Authors: Vanessa Black
Souls of Fire (43 page)
I take it all back,
I sobbed,
I don’t care if it’s dark, I don’t care if I’m cold … I … I don’t care if I die! How can I live when he died … for me?
I tried to swipe the tears out of my eyes while my chest rocked from crying, constricting painfully from the grief rolling over me … eating away at me.
It consumed me.
Through my tears, I gazed down at the man I had only come to know mere days ago.
But it didn’t feel that way to me.
Perhaps it was because I had ― literally ― seen into his soul. For whatever reason … it felt like I had known him a lifetime.
And though he had been mean to me for the past couple of hours, I thought I understood why he had done it. The thoughts I had been able to read had told me everything I needed to know.
He had done all of it to push me away. Not because he wanted to, but because he had no choice. I knew how he really felt … because I felt the same way.
And now he was gone … forever … and he would never know … how special he had been to me. How grateful I was for the kindness and gentleness he had shown me when I least expected it … for believing in the good inside of me … for letting me believe it was possible that I was pure … and … worth loving. He would never know!
My hand cupped his face … his cold, clammy skin. His raven-black hair lay wet against his brow, making his deathly pale face seem even whiter.
His full sensual lips … the lips that had been able to smile … the lips that had touched my own … that had been soft and warm and full of life … were blue and still now. Death in all its ugliness had taken hold of this beautiful creature, and I couldn’t take it.
My anguished mind ran around in circles, refusing to believe that this was it, that this was the end of all we had been to each other … were supposed to mean to each other.
My hands moved to my scalp taking hold of strands of my hair and pulling in anger and despair without my even noticing; my mouth was distorted … silently screaming in pain.
This could not be real! I had to do something! What could I do? What …?
As my gaze roamed around in search of a miracle, I suddenly caught something in my peripheral vision that I hadn’t noticed before. It was a hovering sphere of brightly shining light. So beautiful … so … familiar.
I gasped as the realization hit me. I knew what I was looking at. It was Aidan … his soul. His soul had not left me … it had remained by my side, by his body’s side. Maybe there was hope, maybe it could return to his body … maybe.
“Aidan …,” I said desperately, “… return to your body.”
But the sphere did not react in any way. It just hovered there in mid-air. Maybe he couldn’t return by himself. Maybe he needed help. Maybe only I could do it.
I closed my eyes…
I rushed to the place within me that held my power…
I stepped into the sphere of light…
I let it take me over…
I told it to return Aidan’s soul to his body…
I told it to resurrect him…
I hoped … and I prayed … and I begged … and I waited.
I opened my eyes … but there was no change whatsoever.
My eyes slammed shut again…
I went back to that place…
I stepped back into the light…
I felt the anger and hopelessness rise inside me…
Step into the dark,
the inky blackness inside my soul called out.
Only Darkness can save him now,
it urged me.
Will it change him?
I asked, already considering doing anything Darkness asked of me if it only meant I could save his life.
No, it will not.
He will remain good and pure,
Darkness answered.
What about me?
I couldn’t help but ask, dreading I already knew the answer. The universe did not give anything without asking for something in return. That’s just not the way it worked. Everything in life had a price … and I was going to pay.
You will have been touched,
Darkness said,
you will be mine…
I will be evil,
I said, feeling suddenly numb.
You will not be evil, you will be dark. But where Darkness lies, evil can blossom. However, it is not my concern if you turn evil or not. Do you want me to bring him back?
Yes,
I said without hesitation. I would do anything to get him back, and though it scared me just how much I was willing to sacrifice, I knew there had never really been a choice to make. My heart seemed to have decided long ago … before I had even guessed at my own feelings. I was in love with him.
Even though I barely knew him.
Even though I also had feelings for his brother.
Even though everything between us was complicated.
We had seen into each other’s souls. He had been there for me, held me, soothed me.
And the fact that I had just decided to sacrifice the purity of my soul so that he could live, without entertaining any hope of a future with him, said it all.
I was sure he would not like the trade I had agreed to, he might not understand my choice … and he might not forgive me for it. But that was a risk I had to take.
It was the ultimate sacrifice … and there was nothing I wanted more! If I could save him, I would gladly give my life … my soul. At least then, my life would have meant something, my life would have been good for … something … something other than destroying the world.
Silently asking my parents, Aaron and Aidan for forgiveness, I took a deep breath, readied myself … and mentally stepped into the pitch-black center of my soul.
Tendrils of darkness snaked around me, through me, piercing and entering my heart. With an effort I hadn’t been sure was within my power, I managed to step back out of the darkness.
But the beautiful light that had radiated all around me before was dull now, the beautiful colors and brilliance gone. Black tendrils reached out of the center of my soul and snaked around the once luminescent rays.
It was worth it, I thought, while tears streamed down my face, nonetheless.
If it had saved Aidan, it was all worth it.
The moment I opened my eyes and saw Aidan’s mouth twitch, I knew it had worked.
I was about to throw myself at his body and hold him to me, when a furious deep voice suddenly pierced the silence around me.
“Persephone, what have you done!”
Following the sound of the angry voice, my eyes found Malcolm standing before me. Behind him, Aaron’s features mirrored Malcolm’s disbelief and condemnation.
They knew absolutely nothing about what had happened, what we had gone through, what I felt in my heart. But it seemed they had already sentenced me.
And deep down, I knew they were right. No matter the good intentions that had driven me to do what I felt I had to, the fact of the matter was: they were right.
I was guilty…
Guilty of selling my soul!
And now there was only one thing left for me to do.
And as I hung my head and silently awaited my punishment … both from the people whose forgiveness I sought, and the darkness that had finally taken a hold of me, I couldn’t help but think:
I would do it again … in a heartbeat.
TO BE CONTINUED…
Prologue
T
he first vital piece had finally fallen into place. Darkness reveled in what was ultimately the beginning of the end … at least for the human race. For Darkness it was the fulfillment of a century-old promise.
Darkness would thrive … it would finally be able to relish the taste of destruction and despair that would fill the billions of souls of the dying. It would feast off of them … and the destruction of earth’s light would strengthen its power.
And it had only her to thank. Without her, the darkest and most powerful of them all, he never could have accomplished any of it.
Centuries ago, she had let him in … now she had done so again. That was all Darkness needed. Its seed had been planted inside of her long ago, but now she had accepted it … now she had let it become a part of her, and it would grow and manipulate her … twist her into a creature so dark that she would not hesitate to do its most terrible bidding.
Darkness would have destroyed the world long ago. But it hadn’t been in complete control of Morrigan.
Somehow, even though she had done Darkness’s bidding, she had, nonetheless, managed to delay the destruction of humanity for hundreds of years.
But Darkness hadn’t minded the deferral … it had already waited for so long to find the perfect creature to possess … it hadn’t minded waiting a few centuries longer ― it was naught but the blink of an eye for an entity whose existence traversed the dawn of time.
But now it had started … and soon … Darkness would reign…
Chapter 1
*
Numb
I
sat on the window ledge of my bedroom at the Haven’s ancestral castle in Ireland, gazing out at the landscape.
Somewhere in the very back of my mind, so far removed it seemed as though in another life, I dimly recalled hours upon hours sitting in a similar manner in the home I had grown up in. The only difference was: then, I’d seen and felt so much.
Now, I saw nothing ― felt nothing.
I was empty and cold inside.
Back then, everything had seemed so simple. My life had been a succession of choices I was about to make ― choices that would determine the rest of my life.
My
life …
My
choices.
So much had changed since then. My life was no longer mine, my choices no longer voluntary … my path already determined. Destiny had taken my freedom, every course of action leading me further down the road to destruction. That’s how I felt.
Gone was the optimism I might once have possessed. The hope of an actual future had gone up in smoke as darkness and ice had encased my heart…
When Aidan’s life had been at stake, I’d done the only thing I could to save him. I’d sold my soul to Darkness. And Darkness had kept its end of the bargain. It had brought him back. That had been two days ago, and I hadn’t seen him since.
Dimly I recalled the moments after Aidan’s body had once again shown signs of life. Back then, I’d still been able to feel … the numbness had crept over me gradually ― stealthily ― until it completely filled me out from the inside.
I remembered Malcolm’s outcry at what I had done ― he’d known immediately.
I remembered the thoughts that had raced through my mind at seeing Malcolm and Aaron standing in the great hall, looking down at me and the image I presented.
Allegedly Malcolm and Aaron had managed to fight off their attackers and get away without being tracked. As soon as they’d escaped, they’d decided to meet up with Aidan and me, heading for the manor…
Just in time to witness my fall from grace.
I’d thought we’d be staying at the mansion in Scotland, but given Aidan’s situation Malcolm had decided to return to the castle.
It seemed some of the members of the guard were already headed toward the castle, so that it would be safer for us there now ― though Malcolm had instructed the rest of his family and staff to stay away for the time being.
Malcolm had opened a portal and brought all of us back to the castle. Aidan ― still unconscious at the time ― had needed to be carried.
The return to the castle was fine with me. It didn’t matter where I was.
I no longer cared. Everywhere seemed the same … one place as dull as the next. In a remote corner of my mind, I realized all I had lost … but I just couldn’t get myself to care.
My gaze stuck to no particular spot … staring unseeingly into nothingness as I sat unmoving…
Numb.