Spitfire (Puffin Cove) (26 page)

"
So it sounds like you won't be coming home again," Kevin said. It's not that he sounded sad about it, just…final.

"
Oh, honey. Does that upset you?"

"
I dunno. Maybe kinda. It's just that you're not down the road anymore. If you're happy, then it's okay. It's just been strange, you know?"

She reached through to the front seat and squeezed his shoulder
. "I know, sweetheart. For me too. But I was looking for…myself. I know that sounds dumb, but with you guys all grown up, my life sort of had no meaning anymore. And now, here, I feel really alive again. You know that if you wanted me to come home again, if you needed me, I'd come, right?"

"
Yeah, I know. And I'm glad you're liking it here. Who knows? I might end up liking it too and move in with you."

"Yup
. Who knows? The place really does make you fall in love with it."

If
Kevin, or Kyle for that matter, did decide to come out east to school, she would welcome them with open arms. But now that she had established her own grown-up house, she didn't know what it would be like to share it with her somewhat grown up sons. She laughed to herself. Yeesh. Best to cross that bridge if she came to it.

They pulled up the cart-path, and
Kyle said, "This is your house?"

"
Yup. What do you think?" She held her breath, anxious for their approval.

"
Very nice."

"
Sweet!"

"
You built the porch. I thought you were going to wait for us to help," Kyle accused.

"
I got inspired and decided to get started, then it just snowballed, and it was done. Besides, now it'll give us more time to just hang and sight-see. And there's lumber left over, so if you really have a burning desire, I wouldn't mind having a deck at the back." She winked at them as Kevin elbowed Kyle, looking decidedly unimpressed that his brother had volunteered them for work detail.

Lola
and the smell of roasting turkey greeted them as they went through the front door.

"
Holy cow, Mom. This place is awesome! I can see the ocean right outside the windows."

Kevin
shot straight through the house and out the back door, stopping just short of careening down the rocky slope to the sea. Kyle's eyes lit with delight when the orange cat wound around his legs. He scooped her up and asked her name. When Laura admitted that she hadn't named her, just called her 'kitty', Kyle scoffed at her and said that he'd have to think up a more imaginative name than that.

Kevin
came back in, exclaiming over the view, and Laura took them through the house, telling them about the renovations, then showed them her new 'saves book', chronicling the journey from derelict to home, sweet home.

"
You did good, Mom. I'm proud of you." Kyle hooked her around the shoulders and kissed her cheek.

Tears sprang to her eyes, and she swiped them back, chuckling at her discomposure
. "Aw, g'wan witcha! I'm proud of you two, too, you know. I couldn't ask for more wonderful sons." She sniffed again, Kyle smiled and Kevin rolled his eyes.

"
Geez. So, you got any beer? And none of that gross dark stuff." Kevin stuck his head in the fridge in classic Patterson pose. She laughed and got supper on the table.

After they
had made a decent dent in the turkey and trimmings, Kevin leaned back in his chair, rocking it on its two back legs. A move she used to cuss him over, but now she cherished.

"
Man, I've really missed your cooking, Mom. That was awesome."

"
Good. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Honestly, I don't know how you two stay so slim, the way you put food away. Hope you saved room for pumpkin pie."

Kyle
groaned. "Why didn't you tell me before I had thirds?"

Oh, it was so good to have them here
. And they seemed comfortable with her in her new place. She had had more than a few moments of concern that there could have been strain between them, now that she had moved on. But it seemed as though they had easily hit a new stride.

She gave them the two bedrooms, and she took the sofa
. Kevin had bounded up the stairs, and Kyle argued that he would take the couch. She pushed him toward the stairs, telling him she would see him in the morning. She laid on her make-shift bed, smiling. She had her lovely coast house, her boys, and the only thing that could make her happier she refused to think about. She fell fast into an exhausted sleep. But she soon tossed and turned, too much supper, too little sleep, strange bed, and dreams filled with longing and loss.

***

Laura and her sons toured the coast in her SUV, and she snapped hundreds of pictures. Kyle on the boat holding a stuffed puffin, Kevin on a kayak, half-tipped, giving his mother heart failure, a picture of the three of them with the backdrop of the sea behind them, taken for them by a passing tourist.

They ate at Sweeney
's, where she introduced them to Landon, then the Sullivans. She took them for coffee and pastry at the Bluebird, and Kyle fell half in love with Jill before even meeting her, rolling his eyes and stuffing his face with éclairs and Napoleons.

She caught sight of Kane coming out of Blood
's one day, and her breath stopped, her heart hammered in her chest. She turned her head quickly, hoping he hadn't seen her.

Across the street, he watched her, his heart in his eyes. He drank her in, wild red hair, trim khaki capris, white sneakers and tank top, flanked by two wide-shouldered, narrow-hipped men. His gaze flared, then banked. He realized that these men must be her sons. Jaysus, her sons. How could she have children full grown? He knew, of course, that she did. But seeing her now, with them. Well, it made him realize that he knew so very little about her.

Only that he loved her, and he
had been spectacularly miserable without her. His animals shied from his rough touch, he couldn't work, and Stanley barely tolerated his surly behaviour, preferring to spend his days with the sheep.

He
had had about enough of himself, too. And he was about to fix things or go down in stunning defeat of the trying.

Chapter Nin
eteen

Laura had just put the finishing touches on the devilled eggs when the truck rolled up with two 'Johnny-on-the-spots' loaded on the back. She wiped her hands on a tea towel and went out to direct the men to place them to the side of the house near the trees. She looked up to the sky and thanked God for the beautiful, cloudless, robin's egg blue He had sent for her party.

Kyle
was filling a second tin tub with ice while Kevin stuffed them full of beer and soft drinks. The sound and smell of crackling pork swirled around the yard from the big metal roaster parked out back, and the newly stoned fire pit, courtesy of her boys, was stacked tepee-style with wood, ready for the evening.

Moira had sent
George over hours ago with folding tables and several red and white checkered table cloths. Paper plates and cutlery wrapped in napkins were stacked and waiting for eager hands to ply them with food. A small portable stereo was playing a perfect mixture of rock and traditional east coast music courtesy of the St. John's radio station, and Laura frequently sang along.

She checked the clock for the sixty-seventh time
. People would start arriving soon. Her stomach fluttered. Her first party!

She was bone-deep happy that her boys would be here to celebrate with her
. She was gingerly rearranging the already stuffed old fridge, trying to make more room, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She jumped and whirled, and paled when Kane's visage swirled before her eyes.

"
Laura. Laura love."

His voice was coming from so far away
.

He gripped her shoulders as she crumpled,
then scooped her into his arms and carried her to the sofa, softly patting her face and pushing sweaty tendrils of hair from her forehead.

"
Laura, fer the love o' God, come back." Her dilated pupils slowly returned to a more natural size and she blinked owlishly.

"
Have ye eaten today, love?"

Her eyes widened, and she punched him
weakly in the shoulder, then gained strength and shoved him away from her. She rose from the sofa and batted away his outstretched hand, then stood on her toes and pushed her face into his. Her eyes flashed fiery green sparks at him.

"
Nineteen days! Nineteen damned days since I heard from you last and you waltz in here, asking me if I've eaten? Get out!" She stomped away from him, her light-headedness of moments before evaporating, replaced by a sizzling fury.

"
Laura, love. I'm sorry. Been an ass. Baby. Please. Please, forgive me."

He stood, legs spread, palms facing forward in supplication on arms hanging
loosely at his sides.

Oh,
God. Oh, God. Oh, God.

She let out a soft cry and launched herself into his arms, hooking her legs around his hips as he caught her
. He grabbed at everything he could reach, holding on like he would never let her go. She was kissing him wildly, covering his face and neck and ears and lips, her hands clutched in his silky curls.

"
Dammit, Kane!" she panted. "Don't
ever
do that again! Oh, I've missed you so damned much. Why? Why?"

"
I've only a poor, messed up excuse, love. I was a stupid jealous ass. Saw ye with Mac, and thought….ah, shite. Ye're so beautiful and sweet. I wanted ye t' have the choice. And ye're
so
damned sweet I didn't figure ye'd take it even if ye wanted to. So I stepped back so ye could. Doesn't matter, now. Not ever givin' ye the chance again.
Ever
. And that's a promise. Now, God.
Please
. Laura, say ye forgive me."

She caressed his hollow cheek, looking at the fatigue smudged eyes, and the drawn, pinched mouth
. He had been suffering. Good. Served him right.

"
Alright, you stupid ass." She smiled, all the despair and sorrow of the past weeks gone, in its place joy, elation, salvation. Life was too short for dissection and recriminations. He had backed away for her.

For her.

She slid from him to touch her feet to the floor and kissed him softly on his smiling, drawn lips.

"
Would you like to meet my sons?"

"
Yer sons. Oh, aye. I'd be honoured, love."

Her heart leapt, terrified and excited all at once for the three loves of her life to be meeting for the first time.

"Mom, where do you want…Hey. How's it goin'?"

Kyle
had come through the back door, and was eyeing Kane in a not too friendly way. Kane offered his hand, and Kyle shook it, gripping tight, a silent warning issued, and taken.

"
Kane Downey, friend o' yer mother's."

Kyle
looked him over for a long minute. "Kyle Patterson. Good to meet you. Mom, where do you want the trash bins set?" He was glaring at his mother. She didn't take the bait.

"
Probably just at the side of the house, wherever you think, honey."

"
Kay," he said flatly, staring Kane down, then Laura. He stalked out the back door, shooting her a backward glance, clearly reluctant to leave.

"
Well, that went well," Laura rolled her eyes. "I guess I should have told them about you, but when they got here, there was no you to tell them about."

She s
lanted him a hairy eyeball.

"
Ye're right. It's me own fault. Don't worry, love. I'll get outta yer hair an' let ye enjoy yer party."

"
Uh-uh. You're not going anywhere mister," she told him bossily, and bunched a fist in his shirt. "Now that I've got you back I'm not letting you out of my sight."

He
gave her a dazzling grin. Then his laughing blue eyes darkened, and his adam's apple bobbed with a caveman grunt as he pulled her toward him, trapping her fist between them. It uncurled and spread over his hammering heart. His hand splayed and pressed across the small of her back, and the other snaked through her hair to grip the back of her head, holding her to him so tightly she could scarcely breathe. Had forgotten how. And then he stole away the last of her breath with his kiss. Oh, she had so missed his kiss. The sorrow, the party, the world all melted away in his arms. In his tender kiss.
He's back. I have my Kane back. Oh, thank you God.
A soft cry sobbed in her throat.

Another throat cleared, then ahem
'd again louder. They broke apart, and Kevin was standing in the doorway, arms crossed over his puffed up chest, head tilted, smiling like a loon. Apparently Kyle had sent his brother in to check out the situation.

"
So this is what you've been doing for three months," Kevin laughed. "I hope you've been using socks!" He laughed louder as Laura blushed, feeling like a cheerleader caught in the boys locker room.

"
Kevin!" She choked, adolescent chagrin reddening an adult face.
Jesus
, she whispered under her breath."Kevin, this is Kane Downey. Kane, Kevin Patterson, my cheeky son."

Kevin
's smile widened even more. "Cool. Dude, can you give us a hand moving the chairs around back?" God. Kevin was so bright and light and easy. He just rolled with life. Joyfully.

Kane patted
Laura's bum, kissed her lips, and went to shake hands with the still grinning Kevin.

And
a world that had spun out of orbit was set back on its axis. She watched Kane follow Kevin through the door, sighed happily, and then pitched over the kitchen sink, nausea rolling through her, knees suddenly gone weak on shaky pins.

As she swallowed back the bile
in her throat, she thought
I guess I did forget to have breakfast
. The physical labour of the past few weeks, the emotional turmoil, and the shock of Kane coming back into her life amidst the party preparations all crashed around her and she had an overwhelming feeling that she was going to hurl. She pressed a cold cloth to her face, then tugged open the fridge door to grab the carton of orange juice, and drank deeply, straight from the spout. She took several deep breaths and felt her stomach settle and her energy slowly return. Holy shit. Maybe she was pre-diabetic. She'd have to keep an eye on that.
And remember to bloody well eat. Stupid woman.

Her guests had started to arrive, toting chairs and blankets, and those who hadn't met her boys were introduced. Someone brought a set of horseshoes, and the clanging and thudding, cheering and groaning of the hits and misses rang out above the soft lilt of the radio's music and the calls of the gulls over the ocean, the song birds in her trees. Dishes and crocks and platters began to fill tables, and ice cubes sloshed in their watery buckets as hands dipped in and lowered the levels can by can.

Laura
chatted with Moira and George, filling them in on the remainder of the renovations, what she had been doing with the boys, and evading Moira's leading questions regarding Kane. She met their pretty great-nieces, watching with amusement as they teased her sons about their accents.

She caught up with
Landon's parents, and was pleased to see that Arlene from the café, and her inspector and plumber and their wives had joined the party. Landon and Jill had struck a truce of sorts, and they talked easily with one another, tempered by the children's game of ring toss they were refereeing.

Folks had come with instruments, and they started warming up as the sun tipped over the tops of the trees, dappling her yard with its warm summer kiss
. Kane milled about, chatting with friends, playing with the children, and Laura got a little thrill each time she saw him speaking with Kyle or Kevin. Kyle's body language remained stiff, but as the day wore on, the beer flowed, and as his shell was softened by the pretty girls, he began to relax.

The music started, and someone thought to turn the radio off
. Probably Kane, she smiled. She would catch site of him frequently, her eyes subconsciously seeking him out every chance they could. And every time she did, she would find his eyes on her. Warming her. Thrilling her.

Laura
swiped at tears as a kind soul leant Kevin a guitar and he began playing with the band. The bodhran player was teaching Kyle, and he picked it up quickly, his drum lessons from childhood coming back easily. They made her proud, her boys. Proud of the men they had become, and proud of the job she had done raising them.

Someone rang out the call to arms, they all bowed their heads, and
Jill's father, Tom, led the blessing.

"
Dear Lord, tank Ye fer dis glorious day, fer da food we're about to receive, an' fer da health of our friends an' loved ones. An' most of all, dear God, tank Ye fer makin' women beautiful and foolish. Beautiful so da men would love 'em, an' foolish so dey would love da men. Amen."

Amens were chuckled
out, and the musicians commenced the feast.

George
graciously carved the pig, and the children stood around him, watching him artfully dissect the delicious smelling roast. They chewed on cracklins, and took turns carefully carrying platters of pork to the buffet table that groaned under the weight of all the food.

Along with
the roast pork, there were platters of corn-on-the-cob, crocks of baked beans, toutons and scruncheons, fish and brewis, fried cod tongues, moose stew, a myriad of salads, homemade beet and dill pickles, and for dessert cobblers and puddings and a tray piled high with Jill's pastries.

"
Mom, get the paddles. I think I'm gonna have a heart attack."

Kyle
was lying flat out on the ground, his normally flat belly rounded like a snake after its weekly carnage.

Laura
smiled, and chided, "I think you'd have been alright if you hadn't eaten that last éclair of Jill's."

"
Oh, yeah," he sighed. "Where is she? I'm gonna propose."

Laura
giggled. How funny would that be? One of her best friends turned daughter-in-law, the beautiful little sprite who had stolen her heart, her step-granddaughter. She suddenly sobered.

Jesus
, that made her feel so old!

Jill
walked up to her and nudged her shoulder with her own. "Whadya think, granny?"

"
Just shut it, girl."

Jill
chortled, and Kyle rolled to his side in the grass, grinning. Laura was relieved that Kyle had finally loosened up. Of her two boys, she worried about him more. He tended to scrutinize and weigh everything far too much. Just like his mother.

She looke
d around, locating Kevin, the nieces seated on either side of him, taking turns feeding him forkfuls from their plates. She should probably be worrying about becoming a gramma from that one first.

Kane walked up to stand beside her, sliding a
hand lightly down her spine. She gave a little, hopefully unnoticed shiver. "Ye've got good men there, Spitfire," he whispered into her ear. "Well rounded and confident. I like 'em." She smiled at him, inordinately pleased that he thought so, and that he had said so.