Authors: Zdenko Basic
I stood petrified with horror and rage. I endeavored to reply, but my tongue refused its office. At length I turned on my heel, livid with wrath, and inwardly consigning the whole tribe of the Talbots to the innermost regions of Erebus. It was evident that my considerate friend,
il fanatico
, had quite forgotten his appointment with myselfâhad forgotten it as soon as it was made. At no time was he a very scrupulous man of his word. There was no help for it; so smothering my vexation as well as I could, I strolled moodily up the street, propounding futile inquiries about Madame Lalande to every male acquaintance I met. By report she was known, I found, to allâto many by sightâbut she had been in town only a few weeks, and there were very few, therefore, who claimed her personal acquaintance. These few, being still comparatively strangers, could not, or would not, take the liberty of introducing me through the formality of a morning call. While I stood thus, in despair, conversing with a trio of friends upon the all-absorbing subject of my heart, it so happened that the subject itself passed by.
“As I live, there she is!” cried one.
“Surprisingly beautiful!” exclaimed a second.
“An angel upon earth!” ejaculated a third.
I looked; and in an open carriage which approached us, passing slowly down the street, sat the enchanting vision of the opera, accompanied by the younger lady who had occupied a portion of her box.
“Her companion also wears remarkably well,” said the one of my trio who had spoken first.
“Astonishingly,” said the second; “still quite a brilliant air, but art will do wonders. Upon my word, she looks better than she did at Paris five years ago. A beautiful woman still;âdon't you think so, Froissart?âSimpson, I mean.”
“Still!”
said I, “and why shouldn't she be? But compared with her friend she is as a rushlight to the evening starâa glow-worm to Antares.”
“Ha! ha! ha!âwhy, Simpson, you have an astonishing tact at making discoveriesâoriginal ones, I mean.” And here we separated, while one of the trio began humming a gay
vaudeville
, of which I caught only the linesâ
Ninon, Ninon, Ninon à basâ
à bas Ninon De L'Enclos!
During this little scene, however, one thing had served greatly to console me, although it fed the passion by which I was consumed. As the carriage of Madame Lalande rolled by our group, I had observed that she recognized me; and more than this, she had blessed me, by the most seraphic of all imaginable smiles, with no equivocal mark of the recognition.
As for an introduction, I was obliged to abandon all hope of it, until such time as Talbot should think proper to return from the country. In the meantime I perseveringly frequented every reputable place of public amusement; and, at length, at the theatre, where I first saw her, I had the supreme bliss of meeting her, and of exchanging glances with her once again. This did not occur, however, until the lapse of a fortnight. Every day, in the
interim
, I had inquired for Talbot at his hotel, and every day had been thrown into a spasm of wrath by the everlasting “Not come home yet” of his footman.
Upon the evening in question, therefore, I was in a condition little short of madness. Madame Lalande, I had been told, was a Parisianâhad lately arrived from Parisâmight she not suddenly return?âreturn before Talbot came backâand might she not be thus lost to me forever? The thought was too terrible to bear. Since my future happiness was at issue, I resolved to act with a manly decision. In a word, upon the breaking up of the play, I traced the lady to her residence, noted the address, and the next morning sent her a full and elaborate letter, in which I poured out my whole heart.
I spoke boldly, freelyâin a word, I spoke with passion. I concealed nothingânothing even of my weakness. I alluded to the romantic circumstances of our first meetingâeven to the glances which had passed between us. I went so far as to say that I felt assured of her love; while I offered this assurance, and my own intensity of devotion, as two excuses for my otherwise unpardonable conduct. As a third, I spoke of my fear that she might quit the city before I could have the opportunity of a formal introduction. I concluded the most wildly enthusiastic epistle ever penned, with a frank declaration of my worldly circumstancesâof my affluenceâand with an offer of my heart and of my hand.
In an agony of expectation I awaited the reply. After what seemed the lapse of a century it came.
Yes,
actually came
. Romantic as all this may appear, I really received a letter from Madame Lalandeâthe beautiful, the wealthy, the idolized Madame Lalande. Her eyesâher magnificent eyes, had not belied her noble heart. Like a true Frenchwoman, as she was, she had obeyed the frank dictates of her reasonâthe generous impulses of her natureâdespising the conventional pruderies of the world. She had
not
scorned my proposals. She had
not
sheltered herself in silence. She had
not
returned my letter unopened. She had even sent me, in reply, one penned by her own exquisite fingers. It ran thus:
“Monsieur Simpson vill pardonne me for not compose de butefulle tong of his contrée so vell as might. It is only de late dat I am arrive, and not yet ave do opportunité for toâl'étudier
.
“Vid dis apologie for the manière, I vill now say dat, hélas!âMonsieur Simpson ave guess but de too true. Need I say de more? Hélas! am I not ready speak de too moshe?
“EUGÃNIE LALAND.”
This noble-spirited note I kissed a million times, and committed, no doubt, on its account, a thousand other extravagances that have now escaped my memory. Still Talbot
would
not return. Alas! could he have formed even the vaguest idea of the suffering his absence had occasioned his friend, would not his sympathizing nature have flown immediately to my relief? Still, however, he came
not
. I wrote. He replied. He was detained by urgent businessâbut would shortly return. He begged me not to be impatientâto moderate my transportsâto read soothing booksâto drink nothing stronger than Hockâand to bring the consolations of philosophy to my aid. The fool! if he could not come himself, why, in the name of every thing rational, could he not have enclosed me a letter of presentation? I wrote him again, entreating him to forward one forthwith. My letter was returned by
that
footman, with the following endorsement in pencil. The scoundrel had joined his master in the country:
“Left Sââyesterday, for parts unknownâdid not say whereâor when be backâso thought best to return letter, knowing your handwriting, and as how you is always, more or less, in a hurry
.
“Yours sincerely, STUBBS.”
After this, it is needless to say, that I devoted to the infernal deities both master and valet:âbut there was little use in anger, and no consolation at all in complaint.
But I had yet a resource left, in my constitutional audacity. Hitherto it had served me well, and I now resolved to make it avail me to the end. Besides, after the correspondence which had passed between us, what act of mere informality
could
I commit, within bounds, that ought to be regarded as indecorous by Madame Lalande? Since the affair of the letter, I had been in the habit of watching her house, and thus discovered that, about twilight, it was her custom to promenade, attended only by a negro in livery, in a public square overlooked by her windows. Here, amid the luxuriant and shadowing groves, in the gray gloom of a sweet midsummer evening, I observed my opportunity and accosted her.
The better to deceive the servant in attendance, I did this with the assured air of an old and familiar acquaintance. With a presence of mind truly Parisian, she took the cue at once, and, to greet me, held out the most bewitchingly little of hands. The valet at once fell into the rear; and now, with hearts full to overflowing, we discoursed long and unreservedly of our love.
As Madame Lalande spoke English even less fluently than she wrote it, our conversation was necessarily in French. In this sweet tongue, so adapted to passion, I gave loose to the impetuous enthusiasm of my nature, and, with all the eloquence I could command, besought her to consent to an immediate marriage.
At this impatience she smiled. She urged the old story of decorumâthat bug-bear which deters so many from bliss until the opportunity for bliss has forever gone by. I had most imprudently made it known among my friends, she observed, that I desired her acquaintanceâthus that I did not possess itâthus, again, there was no possibility of concealing the date of our first knowledge of each other. And then she adverted, with a blush, to the extreme recency of this date. To wed immediately would be improperâwould be indecorousâwould be
outré
. All this she said with a charming air of
naïveté
which enraptured while it grieved and convinced me. She went even so far as to accuse me, laughingly, of rashnessâof imprudence. She bade me remember that I really even knew not who she wasâwhat were her prospects, her connections, her standing in society. She begged me, but with a sigh, to reconsider my proposal, and termed my love an infatuationâa will o' the wispâa fancy or fantasy of the momentâa baseless and unstable creation rather of the imagination than of the heart. These things she uttered as the shadows of the sweet twilight gathered darkly and more darkly around usâand then, with a gentle pressure of her fairy-like hand, overthrew, in a single sweet instant, all the argumentative fabric she had reared.
I replied as best I couldâas only a true lover can. I spoke at length, and perseveringly of my devotion, of my passionâof her exceeding beauty, and of my own enthusiastic admiration. In conclusion, I dwelt, with a convincing energy, upon the perils that encompass the course of loveâthat course of true love that never did run smooth,âand thus deduced the manifest danger of rendering that course unnecessarily long.
This latter argument seemed finally to soften the rigor of her determination. She relented; but there was yet an obstacle, she said, which she felt assured I had not properly considered. This was a delicate pointâfor a woman to urge, especially so; in mentioning it, she saw that she must make a sacrifice of her feelings; still, for me, every sacrifice should be made. She alluded to the topic of age. Was I awareâwas I fully aware of the discrepancy between us? That the age of the husband, should surpass by a few yearsâeven by fifteen or twentyâthe age of the wife, was regarded by the world as admissible, and, indeed, as even proper; but she had always entertained the belief that the years of the wife should
never
exceed in number those of the husband. A discrepancy of this unnatural kind gave rise, too frequently, alas! to a life of unhappiness. Now she was aware that my own age did not exceed two and twenty; and I, on the contrary, perhaps, was
not
aware that the years of my Eugénie extended very considerably beyond that sum.
About all this there was a nobility of soulâa dignity of candorâwhich delightedâwhich enchanted meâwhich eternally riveted my chains. I could scarcely restrain the excessive transport which possessed me.
“My sweetest Eugénie,” I cried, “what is all this about which you are discoursing? Your years surpass in some measure my own. But what then? The customs of the world are so many conventional follies. To those who love as ourselves, in what respect differs a year from an hour? I am twenty-two, you say; granted: indeed, you may as well call me, at once, twenty-three. Now you yourself, my dearest Eugénie, can have numbered no more thanâcan have numbered no more thanâno more thanâthanâthanâthanâ”
Here I paused for an instant, in the expectation that Madame Lalande would interrupt me by supplying her true age. But a Frenchwoman is seldom direct, and has always, by way of answer to an embarrassing query, some little practical reply of her own. In the present instance, Eugénie, who for a few moments past had seemed to be searching for something in her bosom, at length let fall upon the grass a miniature, which I immediately picked up and presented to her.
“Keep it!” she said, with one of her most ravishing smiles. “Keep it for my sakeâfor the sake of her whom it too flatteringly represents. Besides, upon the back of the trinket you may discover, perhaps, the very information you seem to desire. It is now, to be sure, growing rather darkâbut you can examine it at your leisure in the morning. In the meantime, you shall be my escort home to-night. My friends are about holding a little musical
levée
. I can promise you, too, some good singing. We French are not nearly so punctilious as you Americans, and I shall have no difficulty in smuggling you in, in the character of an old acquaintance.”