Stepbrother With Benefits 15 (Third Season) (5 page)

Yes, um...
Ashleyisaslut.com
, how could I forget that?

I guess maybe that's what Jake was going for, but it doesn't mean anything.  I'm not actually a slut.  Is that what other people would think, though?  Even if I don't think I'm a slut, it's true that I've been having sex with my stepbrother, and... well, it's not exactly the most normal situation ever, now is it?

I don't think it's wrong, but I don't know what other people would think, too.  Even if I don't think it's wrong, it doesn't stop other people from disagreeing with me and from harassing me.

Ugh.  I shouldn't be doing this.  I shouldn't be questioning myself, especially not after the wonderful summer that Ethan and I had together, with a wonderful promise of much more now even though we've been forced into a long distance relationship.  It's hard, though.

The website loads and I show it all to my mom.  She looks through it with an open mind, but she pauses when I scroll down to show the screenshot of the text message I accidentally sent to Jake.

"Oh my," she says.  "Ashley!"

"What!" I say, defensive.

"That's kind of dirty, don't you think?  Ethan's your stepbrother, so I can see how you might call him your brother now and again, but doing it in a sexy way?  Really now..."

"Mom, I don't even know how to dirty talk to anyone and I wanted to try it!  It's, um... taboo, you know?  It's kind of exciting.  Ethan liked it the one time we..."

Er... wait... I can't say that.  Yes, I'm definitely not going to tell my mom about the times I coaxed Ethan on during our stepbrother with benefits week by calling him "brother" while we were having sex.  Because I'm just not even going to explain the sex parts to my mom.  I won't!  I refuse!

"It's alright," my mom says, laughing.  "It's a little different, but sometimes it can be fun to get extra naughty, right?"

"He, um... don't get the wrong idea, alright?  But... when we were... and I said that... Ethan got harder?"  Wait, didn't I just tell myself I
wasn't
going to say this?  Yes, well...  "Not for any reason.  I mean, that's not true, it was obviously for a reason, but I don't think it's bad, because we don't actually have any regular brothers or sisters, so... I've heard that only children tend to have fantasies like that the most.  Do you think that's true?"

"Oh, that's interesting," my mom says, thoughtful.  "Really?  He got harder?"

"Mom!  That's all you got out of what I just said?"

"Well, I'm trying to take this all in!" she says, laughing.

"I just... I don't know... there's a whole website now.  Everyone knows."

"The thing is, honey," my mom says, "everyone has their own fantasies, and there's nothing wrong with that, as long as everything is legal and everyone involved is consenting adults."

"Now," she continues, "that doesn't mean everyone's going to accept or understand them.  They might think you're weird or disturbing or wrong.  Honestly, though, who cares?  You're not having sex with them, you're enjoying yourself with Ethan, and if you two want to say some words that you both find exciting, then I don't think there's anything wrong with that."

"I guess..." I mumble.

"I mean, really, there's plenty of other fantasies that people think are strange, too.  Like that BDSM thing in those books with the billionaire.  Spankings and tying people up and kinky fuckery.  Actually, those were nice books.  Have you read them?"

"Um... maybe..."

"Or, oh!  I read some book about breeding fantasies recently.  That one was interesting.  I'd never thought about it before, but, oh, the risk of impregnation is kind of exciting.  And then the man claiming you as his own by making you his and filling you with a baby, and—"

"Mom!"

"To be fair, I don't quite understand the appeal, but maybe I'm biased.  When I was dating Ethan's father, his money caused us more grief than anything, so the idea of billionaires isn't very sexy to me on its own.  Really, if the man isn't nice, it doesn't matter how much money he makes.  Also, pregnancy?  Been there, done that.  It's fun enough sometimes, especially the act that gets it all started, but then there's aches and pains and... I love you, dear, but by the third trimester you were kind of a pain.  As for spanking, who doesn't like that?  With maybe some fuzzy handcuffs now and then."

"I don't even know what we're talking about anymore," I say.

"We're having a slumber party, Ashley!  Remember, I'm staying over tonight?  Alright, let's play a game.  You tell me your most private sexual fantasy and I'll tell you mine, and then we can laugh about it."

"...Are you serious?"

I don't know what kind of game this is, but it's definitely a little awkward...

"Fine.  I'll go first.  Mine's a doozy, so hold onto your seat," my mom says.

"Really, you don't have to..."

"No, no, I insist," she says.  "I'd never do this, of course, but sometimes I think it'd be exciting to be a stripper for a day, and then go into one of those VIP rooms, you know?  And have the man pay me extra for a... a happy ending!  Is that what they call it?  I don't know.  I mean, I wouldn't do it with just anyone, and I don't think I'd want to be a stripper, either, but I think it'd be fun to play at it with Ethan's father sometime.  Hm..."

I don't know why, but I'm honestly not surprised that my mother has weird stripper fantasies.  Also, it makes me laugh.  She smiles at me and gives me a hug, squeezing tight.  I hug her back.  It's nice.  I feel safe and comfortable, despite the awkwardness of the conversation.

"Alright, you're turn," my mom says.

"Um..."

My mom is patient, though.  She smiles and waits, watching me.

"It's a secret, alright?" I say.

"Oh, yes, of course," she says with a nod.

"Um... this is hard, because... I don't know.  Ethan and I have rules, right?  There's a lot now.  You can't tell him I told you about them, though."

"I won't," my mom says.  "I promise."

"So... there's this rule.  Rule number seven.  It was when Ethan and I were talking about..."  I mumble the next word.  "
Blowjobs...
"

My mom makes a funny face, trying not to giggle.  I glare at her.

"I'd never given one before, but Ethan said he'd help me."

"Oh, yes, how
generous
of him," my mother says, somehow managing to keep a straight face.

"Shut up!  I know!  I kind of lied, though, because I know he's done a lot, and I haven't done nearly as much, but he figured it out, so we made rule number seven, which is no lying, but it's also that it doesn't matter what I've done before, it's about what I want to do, so... I don't know.  We've always kind of been open about that, and I think that's one of the things I like the most about him.  He doesn't judge me, or make me feel bad or inexperienced, you know?  He helps me figure out what I like, but sometimes it's fun because I can figure out what he likes, too."

"Aww," my mom says, gushing.  "That's adorable.  I don't understand what this has to do with fantasies, though."

"Well... um... I don't know.  We..."  Am I really going to say this?  Yes... maybe... "We tried anal sex the other day and I really liked that, but it wasn't actually supposed to be that, it was supposed to be double penetration, because I saw a movie and I really liked it and it was about this girl who was celebrating her newfound freedom so she went to a dance club and these two men were dancing with her and then they whispered to her.  They brought her back to their place and, oh my God it was kind of amazing, so..."

"Just be careful with threesomes," my mom says.  "It sounds exciting in the moment, but it can cause jealousy and hurt feelings if you aren't careful."

"No, um... we already talked about that, and neither of us would like it, but... so the replica dildo thing Ethan gave me?  Double penetration with that, so it's like it's Ethan and another Ethan, and... that's it."

"Oooh, interesting," my mom says.

"But what I meant to say before is that Ethan and I have always talked about this kind of stuff, and we just... we try it.  Like the breeding thing.  Really, is that what it's called?  I think it's kind of sexy and—"

And it's at this moment that I realize we're not alone.  The website showcasing me naked is up on my laptop, not exactly hidden, and my roommate is standing quietly in the doorway to our dorm room, while my mom and I are having a conversation about double penetration with dildos and sex with a risk of pregnancy.  Um...

"Um... hey there!" Jacky says, quietly stepping in and closing the door behind her.  "Er... should I go?  I don't know if I was interrupting anything..."

I look at her blankly.  I'm just going to give her the worst impression of me ever, aren't I?  I swear I'm a nice girl!  I'm not a sex fiend, and I do really well in school, and I promise I'm not going to cause problems, even though I guess it looks pretty bad right now...

"Oh, no," my mom says, nonchalant.  "Ashley and I were just starting off our slumber party.  Want to join us?  We were doing an icebreaker truth challenge and telling each other our most private sexual fantasies."

"Oh!" Jacky says, relieved.  I have no idea why she's relieved.  "I thought maybe Ashley was pregnant or something.  That makes a lot more sense."

I grumble to myself, but no one seems to care.  Pregnant, really?  I'm a little more careful than that!

"Mine was pretending to be a stripper for my husband," my mom says, for context.  "Ashley's boyfriend made her a dildo replica of his penis and they might do a double penetration thing with it."

"Mom!  You can't just—"

Really, she can't just...

Or apparently she can, because she just did.  Thanks, Mom.

Jacky interrupts us, bursting out with, "I really like men with other men.  Watching it, I mean, because obviously I'm not a guy.  Or books.  Oh my God, I've read so many gay romance books, you wouldn't believe it.  They're so...
forceful!
  It's exciting."

I stare at Jacky, mouth open, unsure what to say.  She looks lost in thought for a second, but then notices me staring, and gives me a funny look.

"What?  They're good books!"

I try to be open minded.  It's not that I'm not open minded, but I've never really considered the possibilities before.  What if... I mean, for purely hypothetical purposes, what if Ethan was having sex with... Ethan.  That's all I can think of.  Two Ethan's?  Yes.  Actually, considering the fact that I have a dildo replica of his penis, this could become a reality, couldn't it?  If he used it... or what if I used it on him, and pretended to be the second "Ethan" in this scenario?

This is weird.  And kind of sexy.  Oh my God, I can't even tell him I'm thinking about this.  They make those, um... strap-on holders for women, though, right?  Harnesses?

This is kind of sexy in the weirdest way possible and I don't know what to think about it.

"Do you really have a dildo replica of your boyfriend's penis?" Jacky asks me.

"Um... yes," I say.  "I do."

"Can I see it?  I'm just curious.  It's not like... I don't want to borrow it or use it or anything."

"See!" my mom says.  "I'm not the only one!"

"No!" I say.  "It's... it's private!  You two are weird!"

"We're all weird in our own way, and that's fine," my mom says, nodding twice, acting like she's some wise sage with infinite wisdom.

"You were checking out that website on the flyers, too, huh?" Jacky asks, peeking at my laptop.  "I didn't realize it before, but that's Jake, isn't it?  The guy you used to date?  You mentioned it earlier, and then I checked out the site, and..."

I take a deep breath, inhale, exhale, and prepare myself.

"It is Jake," I say, quiet.  "It's me, too.  On the website.  That was my picture on those flyers.  I... I accidentally sent Jake a text message instead of Ethan.  My boyfriend.  And..."

"Oh," Jacky says softly.  I'm not sure what she's thinking, but I hope it's nothing too bad.  "What about the text message on that site, though?"

"Um... yeah... Ethan's my boyfriend, but... he's also kind of my stepbrother?  The text was supposed to be sexy and naughty, but I guess maybe it's weird?"

"Ohhhhhh," Jacky says, suddenly understanding.  "That makes sense.  That's not so bad, right?  Stepbrother, so it's not like there's anything wrong with it.  I have a stepsister, but she's kind of a bitch and bratty.  Sort of wish I had a sexy stepbrother now.  Not sure my parents would understand that one, though."

"It's not that weird, I guess," I say.  I just kind of want to tell her more now.  It's weird, but I feel better telling someone new.  We're going to be roommates for the entire rest of the year, right?  Might as well be open with each other.

"We met when I started going to his school in the second grade," I tell her.  "My mom didn't marry his dad until we were fifteen, though, so we knew each other for a long time before that.  Ethan says he liked me since the second grade, but I don't know if he was just saying that or if it's true."

"Oh, I'm sure it's true," my mom says, winking.

"I bet it's true, too!" Jacky says, excited.  "Wow, really?  Since the second grade?  That's amazing.  It's like you were destined to be together!"

I laugh.  "I don't know if I'd go that far.  I really do like him, though, so... please don't get the wrong idea, alright?  I'm not some sex freak and I work hard at school and I promise I won't be a bad roommate."

"What?  Oh, pft!" Jacky says, laughing.  "To be honest, I was kind of worried about being your roommate, too.  You have a reputation of being...
too
good, I guess is the best way to explain it?  I thought maybe we wouldn't get along and you'd be uptight and always following the rules exactly, studying forever, and... not that's there anything wrong with following the rules or studying, don't get me wrong!"

"I understand," I say, grinning.

"Kevin said you're cool, though.  I like what I've seen so far, too.  You seem fun.  Not uptight or anything, actually.  No offense, I was just kind of worried.  Sorry about the naked pictures all over the dorms, though."