Stirred with Love (4 page)

Maddy was her father’s partner and had been with Graham for three years, moving in shortly after her divorce came through last summer. She was in her early forties, with long, blonde hair that fell way below her shoulders and a toned figure that wouldn’t have looked out of place on someone in their late twenties. Her outlook on life suited her style of clothing – young, yet sensible. Subtle, yet sexy.

Even so, Chloe wasn’t certain that she was right for her dad. She wasn’t convinced either that she still felt loyalty towards her mum’s memory, as her friend Manda would often say. It was much simpler than that – she just didn’t like Maddy.

‘I like the idea of being there from the start,’ she continued. ‘And I want to stand on my own two feet.’

‘But you’ll be doing that in October when you go to university. Surely you can stay at home until then?’

‘Are you trying to say that you’ll miss me?’

Chloe turned her head towards his and raised her hand to shield her eyes as she focused on his face, practically a mirror image of Ben’s. For his fifty-one years, Graham had a young outlook on fashion; at weekends his tall, thin build would more often than not be dressed in the latest cut of jeans. Chloe had always been proud to show him off to her friends, even when Manda had called him a ‘last chance trendy.’

‘You’ve got to be kidding! What could I possibly miss about you?’ he said. ‘The times you’ve forgotten your key and it’s been four-thirty in the morning? The times you’ve said you’ll pay me back when you earn a decent salary? The times –’

‘You will miss me!’ Chloe deposited a kiss on his cheek and opened the gate that led them back towards the house. Anticipation fizzed up inside her again as she thought of summer away from home, money that she’d earn herself.

‘It’s not that far away, Dad,’ she added. ‘And even though Somerley looks like a small place, Hedworth’s only a couple of miles away and that promises much more. There’ll be new people to meet and new places to visit.’

‘You’re going there to work though, remember?’

Chloe sighed. ‘I know that. I can really imagine a good business there, once the room is tidied up. I think it needs some colour. Maybe cream or white walls, so that it’s much lighter. It needs comfier seats too. And we could make trendy coffees, like cappuccino and latte. And cakes, we must have cakes. And,’ Chloe paused to take a breath, ‘I think it needs a lot of work.’

‘What’s you new boss like?’

‘She seems really nice, although I think she’s too old to open a new business.’

‘Chloe, you think
I’m
old.’

‘Oh, she’s much older than you.’

Graham pulled her in close and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. Chloe loved it when he did that – it made her feel loved and protected. Of course he’d miss her. The house would be much quieter without her music blaring out at every opportunity. And much tidier, she suspected. She’d be the first one to admit that her clothes and footwear were spread untidily throughout the house.

She’d miss him too, and her brother. And, as much as she hated to admit it, there’d be more room for Maddy to manoeuvre if she wasn’t there to make things awkward all the time.

‘Of course I’ll miss you,’ Graham broke in to her thoughts. He kissed the top of her head. ‘You might be a pain in the proverbial, but you’ll always be my baby girl.’     

‘Hey, I don’t mind being called your baby girl,’ said Chloe. ‘As long as I’m your baby girl with attitude.’

Graham drew back his head and laughed. ‘Chloe Ward, what did I ever do to deserve you?’

Late Sunday evening, dropping numerous glossy carrier bags as she attempted to wave goodbye to Louise, Kate shrugged her colossal handbag from her shoulder and retrieved her keys.

‘Nick?’ she cried as she pushed open the door, but the unmistakeable sound of Rosie racing along the narrow hallway was the only thing to greet her. ‘Oh, hello, girl. Have you missed me? Ow. Get off my legs. Rosie.’ She laughed. ‘Let me in!’

Kate dashed through to the kitchen and set everything down in a heap on the floor, shooed Rosie out of the back door for a wee and flicked on first the kettle, then the radio.

One by one, she undid the pearly buttons on her coat. Then she went back through to the hall to admire it in the full-length mirror. Scarlet and cream swirls adorned its three quarter length style. She stuffed her hands deep inside its pockets and, swinging her arms out to the side, twirled around in a circle to admire every possible angle.

Kate still couldn’t believe she’d been bold enough to buy it this morning. Usually she’d go for a classic, hard wearing design – something that would never age in the fashion market – but the coat had caught her eye as she’d waited for Louise to try on one of many outfits. It had been priced up at a small fortune; however she’d managed to get it for half of its original price in the sale. She reached inside and fingered the label she hadn’t yet had the heart to remove and laughed with glee as she saw the price slashed from absolutely ridiculous to more than a possibility.

Peering closer, she ran a finger underneath her eyes to rub off the remains of smudged, black mascara. Most of her make up had disappeared over the day and the dark shade of her bobbed hair contrasted harshly with her now pale lips and complexion. She rubbed sharply at tired eyes and grinned at her reflection. It had been great fun to go shopping with a bunch of girls. She hadn’t laughed so much in ages, especially when they’d nearly been thrown out of Debenhams for being too noisy. Hen party or no hen party, Shelley shouldn’t have pulled down the trousers on the dummy and shoved her hands down his pants.

With Rosie hell bent on rummaging through her carrier bags, Kate reached for a biscuit and began to empty her overnight case. The eight-thirty news told of doom and gloom just as her stomach gave out a sorrowful groan. How she regretted not taking Stacey up on the offer to include her in their takeaway order. Instead, she’d opted to come home – to an empty house.

She wondered what time Nick would be back, at the same time wishing that he’d made the effort to wait in for her, especially after they’d had words the other night. As a peace offering, she’d bought him a pair of sunglasses ready for their next holiday in August and a couple of CDs.

After she returned from taking Rosie for a quick walk, Kate noticed the red light flashing on the answer machine. She frowned. Had she overlooked that from before or had she just missed the call while she was out? She pressed the play button.

‘Erm, hi, Kate, it’s Nick. I know there isn’t an easy way to say this. I…when you get home, Kate, I won’t be there. I’ve packed up my things and moved out.’

Kate looked up quickly from the leaflet she’d picked up from the post piled at the side of the telephone.

‘We’ve both known that things haven’t been right between us for some time, but I always thought we could work through our differences. The thing is Kate. I can’t live like we have for the past few months. I…oh fuck, Kate. I’ll never be able to find the right words. I suppose there aren’t any really. I’ll be in touch later. Erm…bye.’

Kate pressed the play button again. And again. Every time Nick spoke, the tears in her eyes stung that little bit more. She stared at her reflection in the mirror above the fireplace and held onto the marble shelf for support. She watched as the colour drained rapidly from her face. Her image blurred over, his voice faded out and she fell to the floor in a heap.

‘No.’ Her hand went to her mouth as tears poured down her face. Please God, there must be some mistake. She shook her head as if doing so would rid her of the truth. He’s joking. There’s no way he’d
leave
me.

But he’d just said that he’d packed his things and…

Kate hauled herself to her feet and took the stairs three at a time. Checking the bathroom, she saw that his toothbrush had gone. She opened the cabinet to reveal empty spaces where he kept his toiletries hidden. Slamming the door shut, she sprinted through to their bedroom. It certainly seemed the same but when she flung open his wardrobe door, the empty coat hangers banged and rattled against each other. There wasn’t even an odd sock hanging around in any of the drawers.

In the spare room, she caught her breath as she registered that his prized record collection was no longer there. When Kate had first visited Nick’s flat, she couldn’t believe how many vinyl records he owned. They’d spent nights pouring over favourite hits that brought teenage memories flooding back – fooled around to many a good tune right here on this carpet since they’d bought this house together. And she’d never been short of ideas for presents. All she’d had to do was log on to the internet and she could come up with something interesting for him to meticulously place in alphabetical order somewhere on the rows and rows of shelves that now left the room standing bare.

She ran downstairs, into the living room. She scanned the room searching for...searching for...where’s the note? He must have left one. Her eyes searched desperately but there wasn’t even that. While her back was turned, Nick had left everything they’d built together over the past eight years. He’d left the house that she so desperately loved every inch of. He’d left the belongings they’d saved hard for. Worse than that, she realised, all the time she’d been trying on her stupid coat, she’d been oblivious to the fact that he’d left her without an explanation. He didn’t even have the courage to face her with a goodbye.

Despair seeping in for the second time, Kate picked up the phone and pressed number one speed dial. Not sure if the ringing she could hear was coming from the receiver or her ears, she prayed that Nick had left his mobile on.

It was switched off.

CHAPTER FIVE

The luminous dial on the clock radio read six thirty-three. Through the early morning shadows, Kate stared into the empty space beside her. Where Nick should have been, the sheets were cool as she rolled over and stretched her arm across to his side of the bed. She ran her fingers up and down, trying to sense his presence. Her arm longed to reach out and drape itself around his waist. Her legs felt the need to be entwined with his. Her whole body lurched forward to nestle into his back.

She grabbed his pillow, drew up her knees but squeezing shut her eyes only brought his image to the forefront of her mind. She threw back the duvet and pulled on her dressing gown. Fresh tears formed as she tried to get one last wipe out of a corner of soggy tissue.

The slightest move of her head knocked her off balance. She’d been crying all night, the pain so intense. She reached into the bathroom cabinet for painkillers and moved aside a deodorant canister. Suddenly, her fingers clasped greedily around a half empty bottle of Nick’s aftershave that she must have missed last night in her hurry. More tears burnt the back of her eyes as taking even the tiniest of sniffs took her back to evenings at the pub, of nights cuddled up together. It smelt of sex, of Indian takeaways, of fooling around. It reminded her of their wedding night, nights in on the settee, nights out to the cinema.

It reminded her of way too much and, in a fit of anger, she tipped the contents down the toilet.

She dragged herself downstairs and let Rosie out into the back garden. The kitchen was a mess. The cooker propped up the shopping bags she’d had so much fun filling yesterday, discarded contents spilling out over the floor. Crumpled tissues littered the table. After being unable to contact Nick last night, Kate had rung Louise. She’d been back with her within half an hour and had stayed until gone midnight, trying to comfort her as she’d asked the question why over and over again.

Rain lashed at the window, reflecting her mood as it bounced noisily off the sill. Through swollen lids as she waited for the kettle to boil, she stared out over the garden. They’d spent a small fortune on it last April and some of the many plants and shrubs were beginning to grow again. Nick had covered half of the space with decking, then scattered geraniums and petunias
around the border of the lawn to add a touch of colour. She remembered how, on the first night it was finished they’d sat on the wooden bench in the glow of their newly fitted garden lanterns, drinking hot chocolate as a toast to their success. Now he’d spoiled that memory. Erased it clear, leaving her with a sordid reminder of how things had changed.

Endless questions scrambled for attention in her mind as she sunk into the settee and pulled her knees up to her chest.

How long had Nick planned this?

Why hadn’t he talked to her first?

Where did he go last night? He couldn’t stay with his parents. They’d go berserk if they found out what he’d done. Well, at least she hoped they would. She’d always got on well with them. No, he couldn’t be with them.

What about Mark? But he was married to Sharon, and Kate had become close to her through the years. She’d never let him stay. What about Steve? He’d worked with Nick for a long time. But hadn’t his wife recently had a baby? No, that would be out of the question. Nick wouldn’t want to intrude.

She pulled her dressing gown tighter around her body for comfort as paranoia began to creep in. Had he really been working late all those nights? For all she knew, he could have another woman tucked away for reference whenever he fancied a quickie. Perhaps he wanted more than a mere fumble over the photocopier. A swift blowjob in the men’s toilets. Perhaps he felt like a long drawn out session with her now.

The tears fell again as she tortured herself with images of Nick with another woman. Maybe they hadn’t had much fun recently, but the thought of him licking the inside of another woman’s thigh was beyond her comprehension. Still it played over and over in her mind. She didn’t want to think about her competition but she couldn’t stop herself either.

More to the point, she asked herself constantly, why had he gone without an explanation? Surely of all people, he knew how devastating it would be for her, after her traumatic childhood.

Kate could clearly recall the day her father had left as if it were yesterday. It had followed her ninth birthday. She’d had a party, inviting all the children in the street that had been home since she was born. Lots of her school friends had come too and she’d had a great time. Little did she know that was the last time she’d see them all together.