Storm the Author's Cut (13 page)

She shook her head. "Just rotten weather—windy and rainy with fog. The commercial seaplanes had been flying."

"Bonilla Island was the last thing you saw? Could you see the fog bank then?"

"Like a wall in front of us." She didn't need to close her eyes to see it, the sea and sky disappearing into the grey.

"Laurie," he took both her hands in his and the papers fell. "I wasn't there and I don't know what your brother felt his choices were. But no experienced pilot who valued his life would fly blind into a wall of fog. He could have turned back; he could have tried landing at Bonilla; or he could have tried to gain altitude to get above it. You can't blame yourself for that kind of error in judgment."

"But he wasn't experienced. He just got his license, just got the plane—it was my Dad's but he couldn't fly and he gave it to my brother for his birthday. And I forced him to go out in something he couldn't handle."

"Laurie, you could as easily say that Lyell Island Logging is responsible for Friday's crash because they ordered the plane."

With his hands holding hers, his voice in her ears, she could believe that it was true. She shouldn't have egged Shane on, but how could she have known what would happen? Had Shane made a mistake in flying on past Bonilla Island? She remembered his face, panicked and wild, as they had flown into the thick grey fog.

"That pilot that crashed in Darwin Sound—"

"Air crashes are like car crashes. Most can be avoided with a bit of caution, but people are human and mistakes happen. But sometimes equipment fails and there's nothing that could have been done. You can't carry the weight for it."

He let her hands go. Her skin still tingled where his fingers had been. "I've tried to make up to my parents for Shane—for—I was a wild teen. You wouldn't believe..."

"Wouldn't I?" He didn't touch her, but she felt his hands on her again, his lips against her skin. She remembered how she went wild in his arms.

"I smartened up after Shane died. I grew up, stopped getting into trouble."

"The woman I hear on the radio is warm and alive and full of irrepressible curiosity—the same woman I held in my arms Saturday night. You can't just put a lid on her."

The studio seemed hot. There were no windows, but the air conditioning usually kept the room at a perfect temperature. Laurie turned away from Luke, sorting the news items into a meaningless jumble.

"I had to grow up. I couldn't go on being impulsive and immature."

"And your fiancé? Which woman does he know? The one behind the microphone—the one I know? He doesn't, does he? Saturday night was like an explosion, something that had been building up in you for a long time."

"Stop it," she whispered. "Stop it!"

He had been leaning over her, his broad shoulders blocking out everything but Luke himself. He stepped back. Except for the dark eyes, there was no expression at all. A moment ago, his face had reflected—what?

"It's past time for me to go."

She watched his back as he walked away. The moment he reached the door, she knew he was going to turn back.

"If I'm right, Laurie, you can't spend the rest of your life with a man who doesn't even know who you are."

The door swung silently closed, leaving her alone.

He had said too much. At first he had offered her the storm and her memories of Shane as an excuse for Saturday night. But she could not accept Luke's parting suggestion that Saturday night her repressed self had burst free. In one night she had created a nightmare of chaos out of her life. She had to be able to work her way through this crisis rationally, bury that night in the past...

When news time came she spoke into the microphone, hardly knowing what she said. Afterwards Nat rang through to ask her to come in before she left, and Ellen called to say Ken was waiting in the lobby for her.

"I'll be out in five minutes. Offer him a coffee, please."

"I'll look after him."

Nat was behind his usual pile of paperwork.

"Will you ever get through all of that?" she asked him.

"Probably not. I don't work overtime. I spend my nights at home with Violet. It's much more rewarding."

What was Violet like alone with Nat? What was it about the Haida woman he called his princess that made Nat so content with his home and his life?

"I had a call from Ken this afternoon," said Nat. "He told me you're leaving the station. He says you're giving notice as of today, leaving in a month."

"He—It's not true. He had no right."

"He says he doesn't like you working overtime. Just for the record, Laurie, nobody requires you to work overtime. If you do, it's your decision."

Her body ejected from the chair and she paced a restless circle on his carpet. "I'm sorry about this. I don't blame you for being angry. Ken and I argued yesterday. He said he wanted me to quit, but I never thought he would do this!"

"I'd like you for the job, but not if you're going to quit in a month or two."

Chapter 9

Ken ordered a drink for himself. Laurie ordered coffee. She needed a clear head.

"Nat just told me you resigned on my behalf."

"Wait a minute. The waitress is coming back."

"I don't want food. I want to know what made you think you could tell my boss I'm quitting. "

Ken hissed, "Later." Then he actually smiled at the approaching waitress. "We'll both have the salmon—and salad, with french dressing."

"Anything else, sir?"

"No, thanks."

The waitress moved away Laurie fought to keep her voice level while tension built painfully inside her chest. "What makes you think I want the salmon? And by the way, I don't like French dressing."

"You always want the salmon. Incidentally, Beverly and John Wainright are coming here for dinner. I told Bev they should join us." He moved his hand to cover hers on the table. She stilled her hand, resisting the urge to jerk it away from his touch.

"Bev and John? They had lunch together but I can't remember—"

Her thoughts froze when she recognized a man across the room holding a chair for his dinner partner.

Luke—again!

Why was Luke here of all places? Who was the woman with him? Her long, dark hair topped an elegant suit that might have come from Paris.

"What can't you remember?" demanded Ken.

Bev and John. They'd been talking about Bev and John. And dinner. Salmon.

"Ken, we need to talk alone." Luke hadn't seen her, but her heart pounded from the sight of him.

"It shouldn't take long to settle what needs settling, Laurie. We'll get married the end of this month, once you're finished at the station."

"You have no right to interfere with my job."

"We're getting married. That gives me the right."

The members of the band were on stage, tuning their instruments. Ken turned to watch them.

"Where do all those decisions come from? We're getting married next month; I'm quitting my job. It's my life and I have no part in the decisions? Did you miss the turn of the century?"

"Mother and I both agree that you'd feel more settled if we were married. Less inclined to..."

"To what? Run off on rescue missions?"

"Among other things."

"Let me get this straight. You and your mother decided my future? Without consulting me?"

"We want what's best for you."

"How do you know what I want or need? What right do you have to decide that I shouldn't help out when there's a missing plane? Do you have any idea who I am?"

"Laurie, you're shouting. I don't know what gets into you. You've always gone along with me in the past; now, suddenly, you've become completely antagonistic. Here's Bev now, and about time."

Had Ken always been like this? It was true that she had gone along with whatever he wanted since they started dating. Was that a commitment never to disagree with him?

Ken seemed happy to see Bev and John; perhaps because their arrival ended the argument. Across the room, Luke was talking with the beautiful, tall brunette while Bev laughed with John over some witty comment Ken made. Laurie managed a smile, but she had no idea what it was all about.

When the band began to play, Ken asked her to dance. It was the opportunity she needed to talk to him.

She resisted the pressure of his hand trying to draw her close. She could see Luke and his glamorous date talking over drinks at the far side of the dance floor. Luke's hands played with his glass. With Ken's hands on her back, she could only think of Luke caressing her. It was terribly wrong, dancing in Ken's arms, wanting another man's touch.

She waited until they got to the middle of the floor away from Bev and John, away from Luke and his partner.

"I'm not quitting my job, Ken. As a matter of fact, I've been offered a promotion and I've accepted it."

"We've discussed this far too much, Laurie." Ken's voice had a quality of strained patience that infuriated her. "I won't have you working at that job while we're married. You can get another job, one that doesn't interfere with our private life."

He pulled her to him. She felt his body against hers and knew that they were too far apart for talking to make any difference. She had been upset and angry, now she felt only a cold certainty.

"I have a better idea. We'll cancel the wedding."

"Don't be childish. The subject is closed, Laurie. It's a beautiful night outside. We'll dance, and then we'll join my sister and her date and you'll forget this nonsense."

Tonight she had been going to tell him about herself and Luke, but Ken was a stranger and she wondered if she'd ever known him. Had he always been a stranger? Had she danced through the last two years with his arms around her, pretending he was what she wanted? Could she really have fooled herself for so long?

"I don't want to marry you."

"Cut it out, Laurie!" They were stopped, standing in the centre of the dance floor. "This is no place for an argument. We'll go for a drive later."

"No, we won't." She thought she was going to cry and she certainly would not cry in front of Ken. "You're right, there's been enough discussion. I don't want to marry you. I want my job and I want my freedom. If I want to go off on a search for a missing plane, I don't want to be made to feel guilty about it. Ever since I've come back from that search, you and your mother have made me feel like a criminal. I'm tired of being watched and told what to do every minute. I'm not a child, Ken, and I will live my own life. The engagement's off! Find yourself a nice, well-mannered girl who doesn't want a career or a life of her own!"

She turned away from him, shaking his hand off, walking quickly back to the table where she picked up her bag and apologized to Bev and John.

"I'm sorry. I have to go."

Bev said, "Are you and Ken—" but Ken was standing behind Laurie and she broke off at the sight of her brother's glowering face.

Laurie pushed past Ken.

She knew he was going to follow her and she moved quickly, hoping to get away and leave him tied up being polite. But when she arrived at the outside of the building, he was behind her; then he got entangled with the waitress and Laurie headed for the road.

Damn! Her car was blocks away, back at the station. From the look on Ken's face, he was determined now to pursue her, to have this out with her. She wondered if he'd always thought of her as a wayward child. It was certain that she could not hope to escape him now, on foot. The town of Queen Charlotte was too small for her to get lost in.

She turned to the right. If she cut through the hotel parking lot, she might...

Damn! There was Ken now and she hadn't a hope of avoiding him.

"Laurie, this is ridiculous! I've settled up with the waitress. Needless to say, she's upset about our ordering and then running out. Whatever possessed you to make a scene? I certainly won't stand for any more of this! We're going home now. We're going to sit down and settle this for once and for all."

She swung around and planted her fists on her hips. "Stop giving me orders.
This,
as you call it, is settled. I don't want to marry you and I'm not going to marry you."

* * *

Yvette's voice nagged in the background as Luke watched Laurie dance with her fiancé.

"...of course, I'll tell Uncle Doug as soon as I get home. He'll be quite relieved to know where you are. I suggest, Luke, that if you have any sense, you'll pack your bags and get ready to go home. Your father..."

Laurie's face was tense as she talked. When they stopped dancing, it was obvious that they were arguing. Was she telling him? What was she saying? That Hot Spring Island was a mistake, something she hadn't wanted to happen? Not true, Luke protested silently. He remembered looking down and seeing the surprise in her eyes. He could have sworn that it was amazement at just how much she did want him. Looking down at her in the light from the fireplace, he had been certain that the emotions that shook him, also stirred her to her depths—a first time for both of them.

Laurie turned and walked away from the dance floor. Her partner stood alone for a minute, then followed. Luke examined him coldly, but he could see nothing to dislike—except that this was the man Laurie planned to marry.