Summer of Sloane (18 page)

And then, there’s my dad. It’s hard not to hate what he did, but then I realize…he’s still my dad. And I don’t actually hate
him
.

“You’re not alone, Sloane.” My mom squeezes my knee. “Just remember that.”

But even though I know she’s right, I still feel alone. Because Mick would’ve been the first person I ran to, had things been different. I miss her. I miss us. I miss my best friend.

But she’s half the reason I’m sitting here.

The next morning, I make my way out to the kitchen. Bob and my mom have both left for work, even though it’s a Saturday, but I can’t be mad that she’s working today, because last night she let me know my cast is ready to come off. I have an appointment with her in a couple of hours, and I can’t wait.

There’s a fresh pot of coffee on, and I pour myself a cup, then add the cream how I like it and sit at the table. Staring at my phone, I realize there are so many people I’ve neglected over the past few days.

Other than a couple of texts, I haven’t really talked to Finn. He stopped by yesterday with a bouquet of hand-picked tropical flowers, but when my mom invited him in, he declined and only asked that she make sure I got them. They’re sitting on my coffee table, and they’re beautiful. I think it’s his way of letting me know he’s not going anywhere.

Mick also texted me, followed by an e-mail, but I deleted them both without reading. I’d venture a guess she probably heard about Tyler’s little trip down here. Although I know she’d never even contemplate doing the same thing. Not pregnant. And especially not with a mom like hers.

I haven’t seen Mia, either. I know Penn told her that Tyler showed up, because I overheard them on the phone. She’s texted a few times to let me know she’s here if I need to talk. And that she loves me and misses me. But I still don’t know what to think about her and my brother. And what they’re doing to Shep.

Out of everyone, though, I’m having the weirdest time dealing with the fact that I haven’t heard from Tyler. In a twisted way, I miss all his texts and e-mails and voice mails, even though I’m the one that told him to stop.

I just can’t believe he listened.

You always hear people say that breakups are hard, but that eventually, time heals everything. I think they’re full of shit, whoever “they” are. I think they lied. Because breakups aren’t just hard—they fucking suck.

“Okay, Slo, I’ve stayed away as long as I could.”

I turn to see Mia standing in the entry hall. She holds on tight to a stuffed monkey and balloons, but as soon as she sees me, she throws the monkey on the counter and lets go of the balloons.

“I know you needed your space and I know you’re still mad at me, but seriously, woman, you’re only here for the summer. And I miss you.” She comes and gives me a fierce hug, squeezing me extra tight.

“So before I ask what the hell happened with Tyler, I need to explain a few things.” She holds up a hand to cut me off. “Uh-uh, please, just listen, okay?”

“Okay. You’ve got five minutes.”

She rolls her eyes, but takes the seat next to me. “Sloane, I know I should’ve told you and I know it was wrong for you to find out the way you did.”

“That’s not what I’m mad about—”

“You said you’d give me five minutes. But maybe we should start at the beginning.” She settles into her chair and takes a deep breath. “So last summer when you both were down here…well…Penn and I…Penn and I kinda hooked up,” she blurts out. “He was my first, and I was his.”

Oh my God. This has been going on for over a year?

She sees the zillion questions in my eyes and holds up her hands again to stop me from saying anything.

“I know, I know, Slo, I should’ve told you then. But how do you tell one of your best friends that you just slept with her brother? And because it was right before you guys left to go back to Seattle, we decided we wouldn’t say anything. Besides, we didn’t even know what it meant or how we felt.

“But then we started texting and e-mailing back and forth over the school year and even talked on the phone. I think…I think I’ve always had a thing for your brother. I just didn’t know how to tell you. I wanted to the other day when we went to Waikiki. Crap, there have been so many times I’ve wanted to tell you. But it never seemed like the right time.”

“What about Shep?” I ask, breaking the rules.

“So that night at the bonfire, after you decided to walk home, I realized what my deal was. Penn was with those two girls, and I guess I was jealous.” She pulls her hair band out from her hair, then regathers her curls and wraps them up in a messy bun. “Okay, I know I was…and I ended up getting wasted.

“Then Shep and I got into this huge fight and…I broke up with him.”

“What?”
I blurt.

“Yeah. In front of everyone. God, it was awful. It was the shittiest thing I’ve ever done, and one look at his face, I knew he was crushed. But that didn’t stop me, because the next thing I knew, I was with Penn.”

So she and Shep had broken up before she and Penn did…whatever they did.

She rubs at her face and sucks in a breath, then lets it out. “Don’t get me wrong, I love Shep, I really do. But the longer you and Penn have been here, the more I’ve realized how much Shep is just a friend…and Penn…well, isn’t. And I should’ve told you the other morning that I’d broken up with Shep, but you were
so
angry…I just couldn’t find the words.”

She grabs a napkin from the holder and starts to shred long thin strips from it.

“I really like your brother, Slo. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about anyone before. And I know I should’ve handled things way better with Shep. I don’t know, called things off when I wasn’t so tanked? He deserved at least that. Anyway, what a mess, huh? I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

I blow out an overwhelmed sigh. “Not as messy as it could’ve been, that’s for sure.”

“I know, but still. Slo, please don’t be mad at me…please. And please don’t be mad at your brother. I’m the one that told him you needed to hear it from me. I’m really sorry for everything. And I didn’t mean for you to think I was throwing this in your face, not after everything you’ve been through.” She rests a hand on mine.

“I’m glad you told me…even though you should’ve done it sooner.” I stick out my tongue to let her know I’m giving her a bad time. “And I’m not mad anymore. If anything, I feel crappy for assuming you hadn’t ended things with Shep. I should’ve known better. I shouldn’t have lumped you guys in with Mick and Tyler. I’m sorry, too, Mia.”

“Then we’re all good.” A tentative smile bends her mouth as she leans across and hugs me tight. “So how are you doing, really? Penn said Tyler showed up without telling anyone he was coming. That took balls.”

“Yeah, I can’t believe he came all the way down here.” I pull a knee up on my chair and rest my chin on top and hug it close. “And I guess I’ve been better.”

“Slo, the guy may have royally screwed up, but he loves you. There’s no denying that. I mean he flew all the way down here to try to get you back,” she says. “Do you think there’s any chance you can forgive him?”

I close my eyes. “I don’t know. Seeing him here, in front of me, it was just so hard. But deep down, I really don’t know if I can forgive him. Especially after he told me that Mick said…she told him that she loves him, Mia. And I think he might have feelings for her, too. Or had. I don’t know.”

“Wait a minute…are you kidding me? She’s in love with him? When the hell did that happen?” Her mouth practically hits the floor in disbelief. “Oh my God, I so did
not
see that coming.”

“You’re telling me,” I reply. “He says he doesn’t love her back, but that’s hard to believe, considering. I pretty much told him it’s over, but I have no idea what the hell I’m doing.”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing you’ve got the rest of the summer to figure all of it out. Not to mention, you also have a nice distraction.” She jostles my hand, but doesn’t look away. “Speaking of Finn, I’m sure whatever is going on there isn’t making this any easier.”

I shrug. “No, it’s not. But I think I really like him…and he makes me happy.”

“And happy is exactly what you need right now. So if you want my opinion? I’d give him a chance, see where it goes. You don’t have to commit to anything or anyone. Just enjoy your summer. You deserve that.”

We talk for a little while longer before she has to leave for work. As we make our way to the front door, she jumps up to grab the strings from the balloons that drifted up to the ceiling. Handing them to me, she pulls me in for another hug, then slips out the front door.

Instead of going back to my room, I make my way out to the pool and realize how much I miss it. Sure I’ve got lessons, but I mean true swimming. Without my arm in a cast.

T minus two hours until this sucker comes off. And I can’t wait.

I sit on the edge of the pool and dangle my legs in the water. I’m not sure how long Penn stands there before he comes and sits down next to me.

He leans into my shoulder and stays there. “Are you ever gonna talk to me again? You know, the silent treatment may work on everyone else, but I’m not buying it. I know you miss me. Like something fierce.”

My brother has this uncanny ability to always make me smile. He’s been doing it my entire life, and it doesn’t fail him now. I bump him back with my shoulder.

“Whatever, P. You’re just lucky Mia already came over and told me everything.”

I kick my feet slowly in the water, then look up at my brother.

“Slo, just for the record, I had no idea Tyler was coming down here, I swear. He didn’t say anything to me. Probably because he knows I would’ve told you.”

He’s telling me the truth, even though it didn’t feel that way when I was staring at Tyler sitting on our front step. But my brother is still my brother, and I should’ve known better.

“What do you think you’re gonna do?”

There’s someone else I need to see. Need to talk to. “I’m not exactly sure, but I know where I need to start.”

After taking a shower, I text Finn:

His reply is immediate.

I hear the throaty hum of his bike pull into our drive ten minutes later.

“Hey.” He smiles and taps on my cast. “Ready to introduce me to that arm of yours?”

“You have no idea.”

He stares down at me for a second. “Everything okay? You wanna talk about it?”

“Nah, it’s all good.” Honestly, I’m kind of tired of talking about everything.

“And are we okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, we’re okay.” I can’t help but smile. And I’m relieved he thinks there’s a “we” here.

He hesitates, but only for a second, before leaning down to kiss me. “Good, I was hoping you’d say that.”

We head to my mom’s office and half an hour later, the cast is off. I can’t believe I’m staring at my own limb, because it’s this god-awful pasty white that’s a solid six shades lighter than the rest of me. I flex my fingers for the first time in weeks, and everything about my right arm is stiff, uncomfortable, like it actually misses being in a cast.

“So what’s this favor of yours?” Finn asks after we’ve left my mom and we’re standing next to his bike.

I pause for only a second, because I’m that confident this is something I want to do, even though the idea scares the hell out of me. It’s something I decided the other night, after Tyler left—and I haven’t changed my mind yet.

“I’m hoping you might know a place that would do a tattoo without parental consent.” Considering he’s not eighteen yet, I’m pretty sure he does.

He studies me for a moment, then the biggest grin takes over his face. “Hell yeah I do. Are you sure?”

“I think I am. No, I am,” I say firmly. “Okay, maybe sort of. Just get me out of here before I change my mind.”

He puts on his helmet, gets on the bike, and waits for me to take my seat behind him. Not once does he ask why, nor does he attempt to talk me out of it.

We pull into a small parking lot twenty minutes later. The building is old, and the paint is peeling in so many spots, it’s hard to tell what color it used to be from what color it is now. Not to mention there seems to be some very important letters missing from their sign, because I’m really hoping this place is called Island Classic Tattoos and not “Is ass too.”

I’m suddenly wondering if it’s too late to ask Finn to turn around. If he brought me here to discourage me, it’s almost working.

A bell chimes overhead as we walk through the door, and a man with piercings in places I didn’t even know were possible—not to mention tattoos on every visible square inch of skin—greets us. “Back for more ink, are you?”

“Not me, Sloane here.” They shake hands. “How’s it goin’, Chris?”

Chris studies me, and I get the feeling he’s about to ask my age. So I do the only thing I can think of. I cross my arms, let out a heavy sigh like I’m bored, then hold up a wad of bills saved up from working at the activities counter. It’s more than enough. In fact, if I had to guess, I’d say it was double what it should actually cost.

“So, you wanna go and get yourself a tattoo, eh?” Chris smirks and takes the cash. “By the looks of all that gorgeous blank canvas, I’m guessing you’ve never had one done before, so you should know I only do ’em big and loud. None of this dainty fairy shit, if that’s what you’re thinkin’.”