Sun God Seeks...surrogate? (18 page)

“Uchben? Those are your ‘human allies,’—the ones guarding Chaam, right?”

“Yes. They have a very large army and use my grounds for training, as do our vampire allies. There is an encampment about a half mile from here along with several guesthouses, apartment complexes, a convention center, airstrip, airplane hangar, helicopter pad, underground bunker for fifteen thousand, missile silo, ten-year supply of clean water, fifty self-sustainable greenhouses that double as emergency oxygen generators, a state-of-the-art underground hospital, a library, war room, and satellite control center.”

I quirked one brow. “Is that all?”

Contemplating, Nick’s eyes shifted to the mural-covered ceiling (it was a replica of the
Sistine Madonna
with the two cherubs). “Oh. And a bar with pool tables and a few hundred board game stations.”

“Board games?” Was he serious?

“The men are very competitive—especially the vampires. There’s a tournament every year. I believe this year’s pick is Hungry Hungry Hippos. Cimil is usually the master of ceremonies.”

“Seriously?” I asked.

“Absurd. Is it not?” He shook his head.

“Yeah. Just a tad.”

“Barrel of Monkeys is much more challenging. Those little red buggers never stay together.”

Okeydokey.

“At any rate,” Nick continued. “General Niccolo DiConti, who has direct, day-to-day responsibility for the army, stays at the camp along with the Uchben chiefs assisting with training and preparations for the Great War—the war that will decide the fate of mankind. With so many well-seasoned warriors about, the Maaskab are less likely to attack us here.”

“Only
less
likely?” I started to sit up. Where I was going, who knew? But running sounded like a fab idea.

He gently pushed down on my shoulder. “You need to rest.” He brushed the hair back from my forehead. “Please. I will watch over you. Nothing will happen.”

Although I could take care of myself, it felt oddly pleasant to have a real live deity wanting to protect me. An unexpected giddiness washed over me.

“Why are you smiling?” he asked.

I sighed and closed my eyes. “No reason.”

CHAPTER 19

When my dizziness subsided, I opened my eyes to the heavenly sight of Nick, eyes closed, sitting at the other end of the couch. His large hands rested on top of my legs, which were propped over his lap.

Now that I could think clearly, I saw the truth; I liked this man—deity, whichever—a lot. I loved being near him. I loved having my hair and clothes saturated with his delicious, exotic scent. I loved how he made my cuticles—and other unmentionable parts—tingle with adrenaline.

It didn’t matter that I knew next to nothing about his past, his world, or—gulp—species. It didn’t matter that the timing sucked or that my world was falling apart. My heart knew what it wanted. It knew the moment we’d met.

But how did he feel about me?

Pondering the question, I studied his exquisitely masculine face and watched his wide chest rise and fall with the peaceful rhythm of his breath.

Ask him.

I can’t.

Since when did you become shy? And think of the agony you’ll feel not knowing. Ask him!

Ugh. Okay.

“Nick?”

His eyes snapped open.

“Oh, sorry,” I said. “Did I wake you?”

“No. I was thinking,” he said.

About what?
I wondered.

He ran his hands through his golden brown hair and then stretched his arms above his head. He still wore his white linen shirt buttoned just above the navel.

On any other man, the partially-exposed-chest look would be so “player,” but not on him.

“Feeling better?” he asked and gave my legs a little rub that only made me turn warm and gooey inside.

“I think so.” I sat up, and pulled my legs away; I needed to concentrate. “Can I ask why you’re helping me?”

He glanced away. “Because I must.”

“Must? Like, gun to head ‘must’ or compelled by your own emotions?”

He leaned forward and placed the heels of his palms over his eyes. “This is what I’ve been contemplating; I am compelled to watch over mortals, but with you, it is something entirely different. The two weeks I searched for you, following our night together, were…extremely distressing. I thought of little else besides you.”

My brain buzzed with ego-laden joy. It was almost too surreal to think that someone like Nick could have feelings for someone like me. He was a deity, for heaven’s sake. And a really, really hot one at that.

“Nice to know I wasn’t alone,” I mumbled.

He threaded his fingers through his hair. “I have yet to find a reason or to come to terms with it, but the need to be with you, to be physical, is extremely”—he peered into my eyes—“potent.”

“Potent?” I gulped.

His fierce gaze burrowed into me as he nodded slowly.

If we hadn’t slept together yet, then I sure as heck wanted to now. If we had, then I wanted him again.
And again and again and again.
I wanted to feel his hard flesh buried deep inside my body. I wanted to feel the friction of his sculpted chest against my breasts.

“Wow. Is it getting really hot in here?” I fanned my face with my hand.

Without breaking his hungry gaze, he replied, “Yes, very, very…hot.”

I was about to lean forward and show him exactly what
I
meant by “hot,” but then he turned away and said, “But we can never be together. We are not of the same ilk, Penelope.”

Ilk? Was he trying to say I wasn’t good enough for him? That I was from some lower class not worthy of his greatness?

“What does that have to do with anything?” I asked in a not-so-happy tone.

“There is no future for two beings as ourselves. We live in different worlds, and I am forever bound to my role—its very nature precludes having a life with a human woman—or any woman.”

“Oh.” That was a better response than I’d expected. At least he wasn’t shunning me for being human. But still, I didn’t know how to respond without sounding needy or pathetic. Because what I really wanted to say was, “Are you out of your frigging mind? You can’t throw up your hands! You giant stubborn ass!”

He continued, “I struggled with the limitations of my existence for thousands of years, but eventually, I grew to accept the truth: My plight is eternal. It does little good to fantasize about it changing.”

Once again, he turned his gaze on me, and I thought I might turn into a pathetic little puddle of nothingness. The sting of rejection bit hard.

“And believe me, Penelope,” he said with a gravelly voice, “after the things I’ve dreamt of doing to you, it would break a mortal man’s soul in half to walk away. But I have no other choice.”

How could he simply accept there was no hope for change in his life, no hope for us? As petty as it might be, I suddenly felt angry. “Funny how your brother seems to disagree. Didn’t you say he’s marrying a Payal?”

Nick sprung from the couch. “Because he is a selfish fool. It’s only a matter of time before he is forced to choose his duties over Emma. He will hurt her.”

I didn’t know what to say. His resolve, his belief was ironclad. And if he didn’t think love was worth fighting for, then maybe he wasn’t the man I thought.

Maybe he just doesn’t think you’re worth fighting for.

Ouch. Thank you, self-deprecating thoughts. Your timing is impeccable. Shoo!

“I will see you through this ordeal, Penelope. And then we will go our separate ways.” He moved toward the doorway that led to the bedroom wing of the house.

“Are you sure about your destiny?” I asked.

He stopped, but did not bother to turn around. “I am a god. I am always sure.”

Who knew a man filled with so much heat could be so cold.

CHAPTER 20

I paced the length of my room for about twenty minutes before deciding I wasn’t buying his “I’m a god, so don’t argue with me” garbage. At a minimum, he owed me an explanation about our plans to save my mom if Viktor didn’t return. And how could she possibly be a Payal but not know? How could
I
be a Payal and not know? And if we were Payals, what exactly did it mean? Was I inherently evil?

I wanted my answers. This was my life! Mine. And nobody would take away my right to drive the Penelope-mobile.

Go take that man his lemons, Penelope!

I searched the living room and kitchen—a very nice stainless steel and granite-everything kitchen—but saw no signs of Nick. I found it hard to believe he would go far when monsters had my name on their hit list.

Then I went to Nick’s room but didn’t see him there either. (Again, I resisted looking at what was in his nightstand, which almost killed me.) When I turned to leave, a movement outside the large French-style glass doors caught my attention.

Nick.

He was soaking in the swimming pool, his bronzed face tilted toward the hot sun and powder blue sky. His muscular arms stretched along the edge of the pool, and the swells of his insanely powerful biceps sparked a wave of tension deep in my belly, reminding me that when all was said and done, humans were still animals
.

Grunt, grunt. Me want big, strong, stubborn man. Me like. Grunt, grunt.

Yes, he spoke to my inner cave girl in a way I’d never comprehend. How incredibly frustrating, given how he’d flat-out rejected me.

I swallowed hard, slid open the door, and stepped onto the sprawling flagstone patio. I sucked in a lungful of the fresh desert air from the gentle breeze.

Breathtaking.

The area surrounding his estate was a tropical oasis of palm trees, lush green plants, and bright tropical flowers—oranges, yellows, and reds—that contrasted with the monochromatic starkness of the surrounding desert. On one side of the yard was a fifteen-foot wall made up of stacked boulders. A waterfall ran down their smooth rounded faces and flowed into a pebble-lined trough that trickled into the swimming pool. Opposite the waterfall, stood an enormous adobe chiminea with overstuffed chairs.

This was the perfect place to lie in the sun, sip a piña colada, and relax with a good book.

Or make out. With Nick.

Ugh! Stop that!

I marched over to the pool and hovered above him. “Hi.”

He remained perfectly still, his face tilted toward the afternoon sun.

“Nick, we need to talk.”

No movement.

“Oh, the silent treatment. I get it. Big bad Sun God is going to ignore the pesky little human. Well, I have news for you; we’re not done yet, and I’m not going to scurry away like some timid little monkey”—
I’d much more like to dry hump you like a dirty little monkey—
“even if you are a god.”

No response.

“Okay. Fine.” I pulled off my shirt and jeans, leaving on my black bra and underwear, and slipped into the shallow water, right beside him.

“I’m not leaving until we talk. But now that I have your undivided, divine attention, I’d like to say that I’m extremely disappointed. I mean, I get let in on the big news—there are actual, real live gods living on the planet—but instead of it being a nirvana-like experience where I feel enlightened and inspired, I just feel sad. Wanna know why?”

I paused for a moment, but he still didn’t respond.

“Was that a yes? Good, because I’m going to tell you. You’re more lost than any human I know. Really, who’s going to feel wowed by a being of a
higher
form who doesn’t fight for what he wants. In fact, he sounds more like a dog who’s been kicked and beaten down. Defeated. Don’t get me wrong. I think you’re sexy as hell, and I want you in the worst kind of way, but you come up pretty darn short in the inspiration department, bub.”

Slowly, Nick turned and rose up, towering over me as he gazed down.

I instantly felt like an ant about to be squashed. Not that I’d ever let him know that.

“Are you finished yet?” His nearly translucent eyes bore into me.

I stepped forward, away from the pool’s edge at my back, and balanced on my tiptoes, meeting his scowl with a snarl. “Um. Let me think…Nope.” I poked his bare chest. “Just warming the hell up, big boy.”

“Enough! You are twenty-five and mortal. You have no understanding of the universe. I, however, have existed for seventy thousand years. This is how I know not to waste my time weeping and whining over that which cannot be changed. This is not defeat. This is wisdom!”

I huffed and gave him another poke.
“
Really now? But you’ve already admitted you don’t know everything, so how do you know your life—existence, whichever—won’t change? Personally, I think you’re afraid—afraid to try. Maybe even afraid to fail because your enormous ego can’t handle it.”

“Are you speaking of my place in the universe or of us?” he scathed.

I gave his question a moment to process. Then I noticed how our bodies were lightly pressed together. Tiny sparks fluttered throughout my body.

“Y-y-yesss. Matter of fact, I am speaking about us,” I replied with a raspy voice.

“Did I mention it is very likely that the existence of Payals is accelerating our path toward extinction? That’s right. The gods derive our energy from the life force of the universe, and the farther away we all become from its natural state, the more likely my kind will become sick like Chaam. And if that were to occur, humankind wouldn’t stand a chance. No. I supposed you didn’t think about that, did you, twenty-five-year-old Penelope Trudeau?” His eyes narrowed. “Never confuse ego for wisdom.”

“You think my existence is going to destroy the world?”

He looked away and took a small step back. “We are not certain you are a Payal, but yes. They are not meant to exist because gods and humans are not meant to procreate; it is…unnatural.”

“Then why was Cimil trying to get us to…you know?” I questioned.

He flashed a cold look in my direction. “She holds different beliefs.”