Sunrise (14 page)

“Yes I did, Dakota.”

“How could you have robbed me of something if I wanted it all along?”

The cloud of doubt before Jamie’s sad eyes seemed to clear instantly. “What?”

“I’ve had a crush on you since the first day I got here. “

“You have?”

“I have.” He tightened his grip. Jamie squeezed his hand in response. “I’m eighteen years old, I’ve never been with another man, and it’s the end of the world. To be honest…if you hadn’t done that, I probably would have never worked up the urge to do it. You’re not like most other guys, Jamie.”

“I’m just like everyone else.”

“No you’re not. I’ve been around a lot of them, and I can tell you that I’d never been around a man that had such a calm presence until I met you. Hell, Steve’s been my best friend for years and I still get nervous around him sometimes.”

“He seems angry,” Jamie mused.

“He is,” Dakota sighed, “about a lot of things, but it doesn’t change how I feel. I love him like a brother. He’s one of the few things that kept me from going off the deep end after that first year in the foster home.”

“What happened that first day, Dakota? You know…when they came to your town.”

“The woman who ran the foster home had taken everyone else to the park. I said I didn’t want to go because I was still upset about being told that I would have to leave by the end of the week. I knew something was wrong, because I’d seen the reports of the rioting on the news, but she told me it was nonsense and to turn it off. It wasn’t long after she left with the rest of the kids that Steve came pounding on the door, screaming that the ‘zombies from New York’ were coming.”

“They weren’t even being called zombies at that time.”

“What were they being called before?”

“Infected,” Jamie said. Dakota shivered. Jamie squeezed his hand. “I wish I could be as strong as he is. I’m feeling pretty worthless right now.”

“Hey,” Dakota said, stepping away from the bed. He tilted Jamie’s head up so they could look each other straight in the eyes, unnerved at the feeling of the man’s beard under his fingers. “I’m gonna help you get through this. You don’t have anything to worry about.”

“You’ll help me?” Jamie asked.

“Of course I will. You can count on it.”

“There’s a meeting at dinner tonight. I’m not sure how it’ll go.”

“I’ll be there for you.”

Jamie smiled.

The sight nearly broke Dakota’s heart.

Jamie rose from his place at the head of the table. “Listen up, everyone! I’ve got something to talk about.”

Chatter around the table stopped instantly.

Please let this be ok,
Dakota thought, scooting his chair closer to Steve as he waited for Jamie to speak.

“I know we’ve all had a bad day,” Jamie continued. “It’s tough, losing someone that we admire and respect, and it’s especially hard to lose a man like Sergeant Armstrong. I’m sure you all know what’s coming. We need a leader, someone who can keep peace and order as we try to rebuild ourselves and the world we now live in. By chain of military command, and by orders from the sergeant himself, I will now assume command of the Saint David’s Ward Mental Institution Base.”

“Bullshit!” Kirn cried, slamming his hand on the table. “Fucking
bullshit.”

“Is there a problem, Deputy Kirn?”

“The sergeant would never let a pussy like you take over the base.”

“It’s in the note,” Private Roberts said, raising his voice above its usual low pitch.

“He was out of his mind when he was writing it, you fucking piece of shit!”

“He’s been out of his mind since the day this started,
Deputy.
In case you happen to have forgotten, Derek, Sergeant Armstrong had
stage three testicular cancer.
The chemo was the only thing keeping him alive. No chemo, no prevention; no prevention, nothing to keep the cancer from spreading.”

“It was probably in his brain by the time he died,” Jamie concluded, setting both hands on the table. “For your information, Deputy Kirn, Private Roberts was studying with the army to be a nurse before we were called back to service. And if you give
either
of us any shit, I’ll have you removed from the base.”

“So this is how it is?” Wills spoke up, his big mouth once again notorious for coming in two steps too late. “The sergeant dies and we get reduced to chicken shit?”

“The sergeant’s gone. I’m in charge now. Besides,” Jamie added, “neither of you were above either of us to begin with. You were
cops
before this. We’re
soldiers.”

Wills said nothing. Kirn’s mouth curled to one side in a snarl, but he somehow managed to contain himself, despite the crimson spreading across his face like blood on a tile floor.

In the lapse of silence that followed, Desmond stepped forward with the food and began to arrange it on the table.

“Thank you, Desmond,” Jamie said, clapping the young man’s shoulder. He did not seat himself. Instead, he remained standing, looking upon the eight men before him. He cleared his throat to return everyone’s attention to him. “I’m instating a few other rules and precautions while we’re at it.”

“Here we go,” Kirn groaned.

“To start,” Jamie said, “we need more than just four men guarding the front gates. Our shifts are too long and it isn’t fair when any of us have to sit out in the cold and rain for twelve hours straight. I am appointing Michael, Dustin, Steve, Ian and Dakota as tower guards until further assistance is provided to us.”

“CIVILIAN AUTHORITY?”
Kirn roared.

Jamie slammed his fist on the table. “Listen here you motherfucker. I don’t want
any
more lip from you. If you have a problem with something, please, feel free to speak up, but don’t
scream.”

“This is ridiculous,” Wills said. “They’re civilians!”

“Unless you would rather continue your twelve-hour shifts, I’d suggest you keep your mouth shut.”

Dakota grimaced. The hot throb in his chest intensified.
Someone’s going to pull a gun if this keeps up.

“Here’s the thing,” Jamie continued, taking a breath before he continued. “Everyone I just assigned to guard duty knows how to shoot a gun. Right, guys?” Every appointed guard nodded. “Erik previously addressed his concerns to the sergeant about one of us getting sick from exposure to the elements. With nine guards in place, we can alternate eight a day, two-and-a-half hours at a time, with a spare taking the place of another to give them the day off. I’m doing this to give us a break, and I’m doing this because I know it’s hard as hell sitting out there all day watching the world crumble all around us.”

No one spoke. Such a harsh statement was likely to create the effect, a ripple of emotion across a room of nine men. Even Desmond, usually reserved to such political notions, frowned, despite the fact that he was in no way involved in the guard duty.

“The other civilians will keep their chores,” Jamie continued, “and their weapons will be returned to them to better protect themselves. Military and law personnel will assist them with the maintenance of the building. Saint David’s will no longer close its doors to those who may need help. We will continue making supply runs on a weekly basis. This is only the beginning. We’re in this for the long haul, guys. We don’t want to start ripping each other apart.”

Steve placed his hands together and clapped. Most everyone else followed suit.

In the back of his head, Dakota couldn’t help but feel nervous about their new situation.

“I don’t like sleeping behind an unlocked door,” Jamie said.

“Who would?” Erik asked, bracing himself as they settled the mattress over the bare bedspring in the sergeant’s old room. “Especially not after what happened tonight.”

“Wait a second,” Dakota said, drawing both men’s eyes toward him. “The doors aren’t locked?”

“They were still renovating this place. I don’t think they ever got around to putting lock-locks on the doors.”

“There’s chains,” Jamie said.

“But they won’t do shit if someone wants to break into your room,” Erik said, gesturing Jamie to lift his side of the mattress.

Dakota turned to look out the windows, then allowed his eyes to travel across the room, toward where an old oak desk and a push-button phone sat in the corner of the room. “What did this used to be?”

“I’m guessing a warden’s office,” Jamie said.

“You know where I am if you need to find me,” Erik said, clapping Jamie’s shoulder. “It’ll be ok, J. You can do this.”

“I know. Thanks, Erik.”

The two exchanged nods before Erik left the room. Sighing, Jamie stooped to gather a tangle of sheets and blankets off the floor, then sorted them over the footrest. Dakota stepped forward and took the opposite end of a sheet when Jamie lifted it from the row. “Sleep with me tonight?” he asked.

Dakota paused in place.

“Not like that,” Jamie continued, pursing his lips when Dakota leaned forward to stretch a sheet corner into place. “I would never ask something like that. I just don’t want to be alone.”

“It’s ok. I’ll sleep in here with you tonight. It’s no big deal.”

“Thank you, Dakota.”

“Don’t thank me.”

Night offered no solace for the restless. Shrouded by clouds and hidden by rain, no moon would shine tonight.

Dakota lay in bed, shivering in the dark. Eyes trained on the window in the hopes that even a sliver of light would pierce through the clouds and offer some form of comfort, he listened to the sound of Jamie’s breathing, surprised that no touch had come any time throughout the night.

I would never ask something like that,
Jamie had said.

“He’d never ask,” Dakota muttered.

Especially not on a night like this.

Not once had Jamie moved since they’d lain down over an hour ago. Their backs opposite, their hearts nearly in the same place, Dakota longed to roll over, to press himself against Jamie’s back and wrap his arms around his chest—something,
anything
to comfort him, but neither his heart nor his mind would allow him to do such a thing, for it was the beast of envy that was said to rest at night, in two lovers’ bed, in one place where, despite everything, all things were supposed to be well, and it would prey on them as though it had all the time in the world, silently waiting but ready to strike.

The bed shifted.

Dakota breathed.

An arm snaked over his back and a hand reached for his fingers. “Are you awake?” Jamie whispered.

“I’m awake,” Dakota said, joining their fingers together.

Neither of them spoke for several long moments. Dakota sighed as Jamie pressed half his chest against his back and moved his head to join him on the second pillow. “Is this all right?”

“Yes.”

“Does this make you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

It makes me feel better.

He didn’t speak his thought. Instead, he allowed his body to loosen under the taller man’s weight and resigned himself to his emotions. Already he felt warmer, though whether or not it was actual physical warmth he couldn’t be sure.

“Jamie?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

Jamie squeezed his hand.

A scream tore through the silence of the morning.

“What the fuck was that?” Jamie asked. They both sat up abruptly. Someone pounded on the door. “Get in the closet.”

“What?”

“I said
get in the closet.”

“There’s a girl out here!” Steve called, pounding on the door. “Jamie! Jamie! There’s a girl!”

Jamie threw the door opened. Steve stumbled forward, jaw dropping when he took notice of Dakota still sitting upright in the bed. “What the—?”

“Not now,” Dakota said, scrambling out of the bed.

He pulled his shirt over his head and ran out the door.

“HELP!” the girl screamed.

She appeared to have fallen from the barbed wire fence. Palms shredded and face scrunched in anguish, she wrapped her fingers through the chain-link and looked on in horror as Steve, Jamie and Dakota ran to join Erik at the gate. Nearby, Kirn and Wills stood with their guns trained on the infected, fingers drumming against the curve of their triggers.

“Are you bit?” Jamie asked.

“No!” she cried.

“Don’t scream,” Dakota said. “What’s your name?”

“Alexis.”

“Alexis. My name’s Dakota.”

“I didn’t know anyone was here,” she said, sobbing, tears coursing down her face. “I tried to climb the fence and I…I thought I could get over the barbed wire, but then I fell and my baby…”

She sobbed. Dakota instinctively sought out the obvious swell in her stomach and felt a pang of guilt roll through his gut as he found it. “How did you fall?” he asked.