Authors: N.M. Catalano
And my tone rises a little as my temperature does as well.
“Yes, a little.”
“Watching you kicking some big guys ass turns me on too, baby. I’ll be watching as well.”
How does he do this? He has me melting in thirty seconds.
“You’d better be watching me only, Mr. Bond, if you would like to keep your testicles. I’m sure you’re quite attached to them.”
He laughs hard at my threat.
“There is only you, love. And to make things a little more interesting, why don’t we test out your skills at the end of class, you and I at home.” I know he is insinuating something, do I dare assume?
“Maybe we shall, Mr. Bond. Never under estimate a Bond girl, love. We always have tricks up our sleeves.” My voice is dripping with sexual innuendos.
“On the contrary, Elizabeth, that’s what I’m counting on.”
Now I’m getting turned on.
“Well, then, until later, Mr. Bond. I’m heading out into traffic and you’ve already got me distracted enough,” I’m sitting at the entrance of the parking lot of the strip mall waiting for an opening in traffic to enter into the one way of four lanes of traffic.
“I can’t wait. I’ll see you after your dinner with your friend?”
“If you would like, yes. I have to keep my muscles limber, you know.”
“Just wait until you see what I’ve got planned for those beautiful muscles of yours, baby.”
Fuck.
“Good bye, Marco,” I laugh.
“Bye, baby.” I know he’s got a shit eating grin from ear to ear knowing exactly how he’s leaving me.
As I turn the corner in the evening darkness onto Market Street in the historic district one block up from the Cape Fear River front, the city is shrouded in a thick fog lending an eerie air. One can almost sense the presence of the past from the antebellum days hiding within its mist, the ladies swishing with layers upon layers of petticoats, the gentlemen in their black tails. This was a very busy port, bustling with incoming ships being unloaded and loaded with goods making their way up and down the coast. With Halloween coming up maybe their spirits are coming back to reclaim their city, the one they built with blood. As I approach the entrance to the Slice of Life, in my mind I see two lovers from that long ago time in the doorway. Their story was a tragedy that came to an end right here.
He was a well-to-do debutante on his way to the senate, she was a beautiful mulatto from the wrong side of the tracks. He enjoyed his whiskey too much and that night he’d already had more than he could handle. She was in hiding from him because of the beatings he had already given her. They loved each other madly but it was a self-destructive love and she was going to leave Wilmington before it was too late. He saw her from across the street exiting the building, her friend in front of her, and he rushed towards them. They argued and she told him she was leaving. He pulled out a gun and told her she wasn’t going anywhere and shot her right there in the doorway. He was never convicted, his family was too powerful, and he probably continued his career in politics. Some say they see her agonized ghost imprisoned in this spot for eternity. Love can make you do terrible things. I love this tragic love story, it tells of passion so strong it is unbearable.
I walk in and scan the room for Elsie. It’s beginning to fill up with the after work hipster crowd who can’t really afford to eat out at nice restaurants but can look like it here in this modern but simple upscale pizzeria. A little arm starts waving from across the small room and it’s attached to my little pixie friend. An attractive Asian college girl greets me at the door wearing the black Slice of Life t-shirt, at least she’s not another typical Beach Barbie look alike.
“Hi, welcome to Slice of Life. Just one?”
“No, I’m meeting a friend over there, thank you.” Don’t these kids know that people who do dine alone would prefer it if it was approached a little more delicately? Just wait kid, pay back is a bitch.
“Ok, enjoy yourself.”
My friend and I shall enjoy ourselves. Don’t judge me, at least I didn’t say it out loud. I guess I am a bitch, oh well. I do it well, though.
She meets me half way into the room and wraps me in her slender arms in a tight bear hug.
“Hi Elizabeth! We have so much catching up to do, you don’t have to rush off, do you?”
She is so pretty and deceptively delicate looking. She looks like she wants to take on the world but you just want to protect her.
“No, Elsie, I am yours for a while. I want to know what trouble you’ve been getting into, Miss Thing,” I shoot her a sly smile knowing she’s got to have a few tidbits up her sleeve.
She laughs and it sounds like a melody.
“Nothing near as exciting as your wonderful night of decadence,” she says rolling her eyes with a frustrated look. “Have you seen Mr. Sex God again?” Her expression has changed from frustrated to excited expectancy just like that.
The blush automatically covers me from the top of my head down my chest. Before I even say anything she’s bouncing in her chair like a little girl waiting for the surprise she knows is coming.
“Ooh, ooh, tell me, tell me!” She’s practically clapping her hands in glee, it’s so cute it makes me laugh. Girls are so bad, much worse than men, have you ever seen us at a male revue show? We’re raunchy, sex oozing, screaming women that would rip the men apart if we had the chance.
“Yes, a
lot
has happened since the last time we talked. But I wanted to ask you if you wanted to join this women’s self-defense class I’m starting next week. It’s at Evolutions gym in Wrightsville Beach, it’s a place for MMA fighters.” And I sit back and wait.
Her eyes slowly open wide as her pretty little mouth opens up shaping an O. She gets it.
“Are you kidding me?! Being in a place full of big, brawny, sweaty, sexy MMA fighters? I am so there! How the hell did you hear about it…..and why the fuck do you think you need self-defense classes?” She got everything. Just like that. Her eyes are slits glaring at me waiting for me to tell her the whole story.
“Let’s get a couple of beers first and order,” I say as I look up at the waitress that’s approaching our table, here’s the Beach Barbie.
“Ok, but don’t you
dare
leave anything out.” She gives me that, ‘don’t try to get out of this,’ tone.
We order then sit back and get comfortable. I look around and notice the place is filling up. A small group of guys by the bar are looking at us and talking to each other. Every so often one of them motions towards us and lifts his chin so I know the conversation is about us.
“Ok, Elizabeth, talk!”
I focus on Elsie and lean in towards her so only she can hear me. The tables are a little close together and I don’t want all of Wilmington to know the Life and Times of Elizabeth DiStefano and Marco Kastanopoulis, with appearances by Santino.
“Marco told me about the gym, it’s the one he goes to.”
“So you guys are seeing each other.”
“Yes, he texted me a few days after that first night together.”
“You didn’t tell me you gave him your number.”
“I didn’t, he said he got it off of my phone.”
“How did he do that?”
“Elsie, do you want to know what happened or not? I don’t know how he got it, he just did.”
“Yes, I want to know what happened but I want to get the juicy details too. My life is so boring compared to yours.”
“Well, I’ll tell you this, he took me to dinner and then a show at Thalian Hall where we had private box seats and it was the most sexiest, sensual night of my life, even better…..well, maybe….than our first night together. And I’m NOT giving you details, use your imagination.” I give her that little bit just to tease her.
“You suck!”
I chuckle, “Yeah, but you love me anyway. So, we see each other for a little while then Santino finds out about us.”
“How? And why is he still an issue?
“Long story, anyway, Santino showed up at my apartment when Marco was there.”
“Are you kidding me?!” her eyes widen in shock.
“Nope, there was a little bit of a conflict,” if you can call me getting choked a little conflict, “and Marco had called a couple of his friends from the gym to come by. They showed up about that time.”
“Holy crap, Elizabeth, I knew your life was interesting but I had no idea.” She sits back in her chair taking this all in.
“Yeah, things have been pretty interesting. Well, this morning while Marco and I were talking I decided that maybe I needed to start going to the gym. He gave me the name of his and since I kind of know a couple of the guys who work there I thought I’d take a ride over. I went today and they have this new program they’ve just started. I thought it sounds perfect, killing two birds with one stone, building some strength and stamina and learning some self-defense.”
She gives me a sly grin. “You need to keep up with Marco, don’t you, you kinky little thing you.”
“Elsie!” If I thought I was blushing before I was wrong, my face is on fire now.
“It’s cool, Elizabeth, I wish I had someone to get my kink on with. I’m so tired of the plain, same old stuff.”
“Well, come to the class with me and find yourself a great big toy to play with.” I wiggle my eyebrows at her.
“You bet your ass I’m going with you, when does it start?”
“Monday night, I’ll text you the details.”
Barbie comes with our food and we dig in. No dainty-pretending-to-pick-kind-of-eating but the-hot-spinach-and-ricotta-pie-with-white-sauce-then-washing-it-down-with-a-long-slug-of-cold-Michelob-Ultra-kind-of-feasting.
Two guys from the group that were looking at us approach our table as we both have mouths full of food, which is not a smart move on their part.
“Hi ladies, we thought we could buy you a beer.”
Elsie looks up at Mr. Smooth Talker. Oh, no, this isn’t going to be pretty, I can tell by the look on her face.
“Didn’t your mother ever tell you that it was impolite to interrupt a meal?”
“You don’t have to be such a bitch.”
“Obviously I do because you’re an ignorant asshole. Please leave.”
They just look at her for a second not believing that she actually just ripped their dicks off and shoved them up their asses in thirty seconds flat.
“Do you need me to draw you a map, oh, sorry, you probably can’t read.”
“Fuck you,” Frick and Frack say in unison and turn and leave mumbling some string of curses as they go.
“Never, baby,” she says to their backs as they’re walking away.
She turns to me and asks, “You didn’t want them to buy us a beer, did you?”
I just look at her and burst out laughing, “No! Holy shit, you just beat the shit out of those guys without lifting a finger.”
“Well, that was rude, coming over and interrupting us while we’re eating. I hate thoughtless people, especially good looking guys who think that any girl will drop their panties if they just smile at them. Fuck those arrogant assholes.”
“You’re absolutely right, I hate guys like that.”
After finishing our pizza we pile our dishes to the side. The waitress comes over and takes the clutter from our table.
“So, what about the Halloween party? Are you going to come with me….as my date?” she winks playfully at me.
“I’d love to, as long as I don’t have to service you afterwards, I hate going out on a first date when my date thinks it’s an automatic-get-in-my-pants-as-payment.”
“Oh no, baby, unless you want to.”
The girls look at us from the table next to ours and Elsie and I blow each other kisses.
“Maybe I will, I always thought you were hot.”
The girls’ mouths just fall open.
Elsie turns to them and asks, “Would you like to join us?”
I think Elsie is missing that tiny part of her brain that’s supposed to hold the filter to catch things before you blurt them out of your mouth.
“Um, no thanks,” one of them quietly answers. They turn back to each other silently.
Elsie turns her attention back to me, “So, what about a costume for you?”
I get a little embarrassed before I say, “Don’t think it’s stupid and if you can’t help me with this, just say so. But, I was wondering if you had any access to something like a medieval female?”
Here is that excited little girl again bouncing in her chair.
“Oh, yes, yes, I do and it’ll be perfect for you! It’s green and it will be beautiful with your eyes and coloring. You just need to get a corset to push up the girls so they are wiggling their hellos at the top.”
I catch her excitement now. “Ok, thank you. I can do that.”
“Come over this weekend and you can try it on. I can do any alterations if you need it. And bring the corset and heels.”
“Ok, perfect! Thank you so much, Elsie. I’m really looking forward to the party.”
“Me too! We are going to have such a good time.”
“I know.”