Taste (6 page)

Realizing even being in the same room as him was wearing down my defenses, I reasoned with myself that one drink would probably be a good idea. In fact, I decided it was vital in this situation because above all else, I needed to ensure I kept the courage and wherewithal needed to hold out against him. “Yes, please. Whisky if you have it. “

He turned away from me and fixed the drinks. If ever there was a time to start asking questions it would be now when he was not pinning me with that stare of his, the one that had so much power over me.

Unfortunately, he got in before me. “You want answers? Is that why you’re really here, Alyssa?”

“We need to talk.”

“Indeed we do,” he replied, sounding resigned. He turned around and walked over toward me, handing me a tumbler of what looked like whisky. Sitting down opposite me, he placed the half-full bottle on the table before leaning back into the cushions.

I took a deep breath and decided where I wanted to start. “I need to know everything about Gavin Barnes.”

“Because of your mother or because of your company?” he asked, not missing a beat.

“Both. They got married a little over two weeks ago without warning, and my PI cannot find a pre-nup. I have no idea why I was implicated in your investigation, but I need to know so that I can protect myself, my mom, and my company.”

He nodded slowly and his shoulders slumped. He lifted his glass to his lips, and I watched his cheeks move as he swirled the liquor around his mouth before I watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed it down, wincing ever so slightly.

“Can’t handle your own liquor?” I asked wryly.

“Not so much when I know I’m being watched while drinking it,” he retorted back smartly, and it hit me again how strong the pull was between us. A connection that shouldn’t be possible, given the limited amount of time we’d spent together. I diverted my eyes and heard him sigh before he continued. “What do you need to know?”

“Tell me everything.”

“I
can’t
tell you everything, but I’ll tell you what I can. The case is still active; we’re just waiting for things to cool down before moving back in. My cover story was somewhat blown when you overheard us.”

I felt my anger taking hold of me again but had the foresight to realize that blowing up at him would not get me the information I needed. I knew I had to be smart, to protect myself from both Gavin and from the man in front of me, the former a threat to my family and livelihood, the latter a danger to my heart.

“Can you just start at the beginning, Mark?” I asked, swallowing down the animosity I was feeling and showing him my sincerity.

He growled under his breath when I said his name again and before I could stop myself, I felt the corner of my mouth quirk up. I watched his eyes drop to my mouth, just like he had over the table at the rooftop, and inside my hotel room. I was unable to stop flashbacks of his lips on mine, his hands on my body and the way he felt hovering above me invaded my brain. Then his voice brought me back to the present.

“What happened is, I picked up my criminally-funded first-class ticket and boarded the plane. Then I saw the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen and despite knowing I was in the middle of a case that could make or break my career, I couldn’t stop myself from talking to her. As it played out, she just happened to be the very woman I was asked to get close to by the suspect.” Barrett downed his drink and grabbed the bottle from the table, pouring another three fingers of whisky before continuing. “A woman that had me seeing past the criminals I’d been forced to work for, and who gave me a small slither of hope that I could one day end up with a woman like her. She lit up the room with her smile, made me curious when she blushed, and had the confidence to go toe-to-toe with me when I turned on my charm to get her into bed.”

“Well you failed at that,” I said, deadpan.

“So far, yes.”

I gasped at his audacity, which earned me a half-hearted grin that soon disappeared when I glowered at him. “So what you’re saying is that you didn’t know who I was until
after
we got to Vegas?”

“I didn’t until halfway through the flight when I was checking my files and saw your photo.”

“Was that before or after you challenged me to find you?”

“After. Definitely after. Lys, I had no idea.”

I ignored his pet name and pressed on. “Then why did you find me?”

“Because I had to.” His words were very matter-of-fact, leaving no room for argument.

“That’s a brush off and you know it.”

“What do you want me to say? He hired me to find out information about you, your company, your financial holdings. He wanted me to get close to you.”

“And fuck me?” I asked straight out.

The silence stretched between us as our eyes stayed locked together. His non-response told me everything. I lifted my own glass to my lips and took a large sip, needing the alcohol for both courage and control since my gut instinct was to stride across the room and slap his face. Instead, I took a few deep calming breaths before speaking.

“So was it all a game to you? Nail the suspect and nail his stepdaughter too, as a bonus prize?” My tone turned scathing.

Without warning, he moved to sit on the coffee table in front of me. His long legs were bent at the knee, bracketing my own. He leaned forward and gently, but with enough pressure to make it known he wasn’t playing, placed both of his hands on my thighs. All the while, his eyes never left mine. “Lys, nothing that I felt when I was with you was a game. The moment I kissed you, I was gone. One fucking kiss, and I was willing to walk away from the case so it couldn’t jeopardize anything I wanted to have with you.”

Pushing his hands off me, I stood up and moved to stand at the glass door leading to his balcony. I needed distance from him so that he couldn’t mess with my head. I knew I was kidding myself though, because Barrett . . . Mark—whatever the hell his name was—had been screwing with my head and my emotions ever since he walked onto that plane.

I looked out over the water of Puget Sound and tried to work out why I could ever have thought it would be a good idea to see him again.

“Can you tell me one thing?” I asked.

“Anything.”

“Why didn’t you sleep with me?” It was one of the questions I desperately wanted the answer to.

“You have no idea how hard it was to walk away from you.” His voice was raw, so much so there was no doubt in my mind that he was telling me the truth.

“Why did you then?”

“Because I never wanted you to think I was only looking for a quick lay.”

“Well you were . . .”

“On the plane, yes. Once you talked to me, no,” he replied with conviction.

It seemed to be true that the brain and the heart—even hormones—could lead you in the wrong direction, even when the right man was standing in front of them. By letting Aiden walk away from me, I realized that being there with Barrett was a mistake—or staying there would be—and made the decision to leave.

“I need to go. I shouldn’t have come here,” I said to the glass before turning to face him. He was still sitting in the same spot except his head had dropped into his hands, his shoulders were slumped, and his posture was one of resignation.

I made my way across to the couch where I’d left my purse but stopped when his arm shot out and his fingers wrapped around my wrist. His grip was firm but gentle, the meaning behind his action clear as day, but the moment he touched me, my entire body sparked to life as if I’d been electrified.

“Alyssa,” he said in a strained voice, rendering me speechless. I waited for him to say more, for the words ‘I’m sorry’ to leave his lips, but he didn’t say anything.

Instead, he stood up and moved close to me, his body heat radiating through me. I felt like I was burning up from the inside, my heart pounding as my eyes slowly lifted to meet his.

My lips parted when I saw the raw emotion reflected back at me. In that moment, I could see the conflict behind them was no longer there—instead, it had been replaced with steely determination.

His hand at my wrist loosened, and he slowly started to move up the bare skin of my arm, his left hand mirroring the action on the other side, causing goose bumps to follow his touch.

His eyes dropped to watch as his fingers moved over my shoulders and traced the deep
V
of my neckline.

“Mark, I—”

His head jerked up, and his eyes flashed with heated anger, equally parts hot and thrilling. “You call me Barrett when I’m touching you.” His voice was rough as he took the last step to bring his body up against mine. “You call me Barrett when I’m deep inside you.” He moved his hands up to cradle my jaw. “And you call me Barrett when I make you scream my name. To you, I’m always going to be Barrett. You’re the only one who gets that part of me.”

Like a moth drawn to a flame, my body instinctively leaned into his.

“Only you, Lys,” he murmured before dipping his chin and gently brushing his lips against mine, then pulling away. He looked deep in my eyes, not holding anything back. Then it was me who moved my lips back to his. This time I traced the seam of his lips and opened mine in silent invitation, one which he accepted with a guttural groan that scored through me. He eased his tongue into my mouth, circling my own before teasing me with a series of short, shallow licks. My arms looped around his neck as one of his snaked down my side, grazing the side of my breast before rounding my hip and curving around my ass. I melted into him, unable to resist the pull between us any longer.

It was just as intense as with Aiden, yet completely different. Where I felt safe with Aiden, Barrett made me feel vulnerable. Where I felt worshipped by Aiden, Barrett made me feel like I was the air he needed to breathe. With that one kiss, he had me back at his bidding and unable to stop myself from wanting to grab hold of him and never letting go.

His fingers moved into my hair, and he tilted my head to further deepen our kiss. I felt as if I were being sucked into a vortex, my body and heart diving in headfirst while my mind was still firmly ensconced on the other side of the safety barrier.

Then I moved backwards as Barrett walked me across the living room, all the while still kissing me. With his hand firmly attached to my ass and my lips plastered to his mouth, he guided me through a doorway.

My knees buckled when my legs hit something and I fell backward, Barrett’s hand shooting out to soften my fall against the mattress. Feeling his full weight against me, his heat enveloping me, I gave in to temptation and to him.

I tangled my fingers in his hair and held his mouth to mine, moaning as his hard ridge ground down against me. Shockwaves of heat coursed through my entire body, and my loose grip on control snapped. Then it went wild. Our hands grabbed at our clothes, desperate to have nothing between us.

I dragged my teeth against his bottom lip as his hands cupped my breasts before his head dropped down, and he drew my nipple deep into his mouth. I held him to my chest, whimpering when his hand moved between my legs and he circled his thumb over my clit.

He continued his talented torture, priming my body with his mouth and hands. First he slid one finger inside of me, then two, working his way up to three, thrusting in and out, my hips matching his rhythm until my climax blindsided me. I cried out his name over and over until his mouth covered mine, his tongue rolling over mine as he eased me down from my high.

He pushed himself off me, bracing himself on two arms on either side of my body. “Now . . .” he said, his voice low and full of promise as he kissed my lips, then my chin, moving to the hollow of my throat, the valley between my breasts, then down to my stomach, and finally placing a wet, open-mouthed kiss on my pubic bone before dipping his tongue lower.

He trailed his tongue down, circling my clit and making my body ache with need before dipping his chin and pressing his tongue inside me with a raspy growl that vibrated through me. He continued to alternate, dragging his teeth over my sensitized skin and driving his fingers deep inside me while he sucked and licked until my entire body ached for release. He rose above me, reached down and wrapped my hand around his hard shaft and guided him inside me. Then I cried out as he buried himself to the hilt before pulling out and driving back in again. Over and over he pounded into me, his mouth dropping to my neck, my shoulder, his teeth biting into my skin as my entire body tightened around him, catapulting both of our orgasms. His deep groan and my loud cry filled the room as we found our release.

He collapsed down on top of me, and we stayed that way for what seemed like forever. Our breathing slowly drifted from hard and fast to slow and steady, our bodies remaining connected in the most intimate of ways throughout it all.

With his face buried in my neck, he lifted his hand up and ran his fingers whisper-soft down my cheek.

“Stay with me, tonight. Whatever happens tomorrow, whenever you have to walk away from me, I want to always have tonight,” he whispered in my ear and incapable of speaking, the only thing I could do was nod against him.

It was like he knew what we had could never be.

Hours later, once he’d finally drifted off to sleep, I carefully crawled out of his bed and got dressed, allowing myself one last look at him. I committed all of it to memory, from his furrowed brow to his dark lashes down to his full lips and the graze of stubble that covered his jaw.

Then the inevitable guilt hit me like a sledgehammer.

I knew I had been weak. His smell, his touch, his taste—all of it had overwhelmed me, and unable to resist the temptation, I’d given in.

I knew that being with him, sleeping with him, giving in to him would irrevocably change me. But even knowing that, I’d barely put up a fight.

The choice I made was exactly what I needed but also posed the biggest threat to my future happiness. My actions bore consequences I did not want to contemplate, let alone experience. But that would be my cross to bear, and the penance I would have to pay.

Because in that moment, seeing Barrett at his most unguarded, in his most vulnerable state, he both took my breath away and tore at my heart.