The Beginning of Never (The Never Trilogy #1) (12 page)

Turning my head, I tried to make eye contact with him
but he was talking to James, and after a few minutes, I realized with a sunken
heart that he was never going to look my way. I had to get up. I first of all
made sure to tell Kate how much I hated her, and then I walked over to his
table with a stern face, just in case anyone thought I was going there because
I was smitten.

I was met with his soft gaze as I approached, and I
sighed at how impossibly attractive he was. His hair was now slicked back from
his face, and his eyes were intense enough to burn. I didn’t blame Kate or any
of the others waiting for him at the table. The first time I had laid eyes on
him I had felt incredibly stunned, of course it hadn’t held me back from
breaking a tray on him and for that I felt braver than all the others. I hoped
he wouldn't humiliate me too much as I reached his table, but before I could
speak James looked up at me and smiled.

"Hey Lenora," he greeted, and I smiled back
at him.

"Hey James," I responded before turning to
Nathan. He was sitting on the edge of the bench.

"I need a favor from you," I said, low enough
so that only he could hear what I was saying. He arched an eyebrow in surprise.

"Okay?" he said calmly, and I didn't fail to
notice how the hall had suddenly become less noisy. Why was I just realizing
all this now after I’d all but doused his face with spaghetti the previous
night? I groaned as I took a quick glance around to catch the curious eyes on
us. He noticed my distress.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Apparently half the school’s in love with you,” I
said.

 
“That’s not true,”
he said and I fought a smile.

“So,” he continued, “what’s the favor?”

“Someone wants to meet you," I said, eager to get
this over with. He studied me for a moment.

"Why?" he asked, his voice back to the
chilling calm I was familiar with.

After considering the question for a moment, I said, “I
don’t think it’ll be proper to explicitly tell you why, so could we just take
it as a favor? Please?”

He continued to watch me and I began to squirm under
his gaze, at a complete loss on what was going through his mind. I expected
that he was surprised, but what I prayed that he wouldn’t be was offended, or
rude if he did want to turn me down.

"Okay," he finally said, and my head snapped
up in surprise.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” he said, like we were just going for ice-cream
instead of going to prostitute him. Now I really wanted him to say no.

“Why didn’t you say no?”

He was just about to get up as I said that, so he sat
back down.

He sighed. “What do you want?”

“What do
you
want?”

“I just want to eat my dinner.”

“Well I thought you’d say no.”

“I thought so too,” he said. “Do you want me to say
no?”

I considered this for a moment, and finally said, “I
don’t know. I think we should just go and get it over with. It’s not a big
deal.”

“Okay,” he said, and he rose to go with me. James was
watching us, probably wondering what was going on but he didn’t ask so we left
without speaking to him.

What the hell are
you doing
? I kept asking myself as we headed towards my table. I wasn’t
even certain that I could come up to talk to him whenever I wanted and here I
was, acting the pimp. And worse, he obliged.
It has to be out of pity
, I thought, and shook my head at how
pathetic I had become.

When we reached the table, I immediately went to my
seat while he took the one that Kate had reserved for him beside her. I sat
across from them and gazed at Kate, but she refused to look at him. She was
trying to pretend like she didn't even notice that someone was sitting beside
her and that aggravated me. Nathan smiled.

"Kate!" I called sharply, and she looked up
at me, but shifted slightly away from Nathan.

I couldn't believe it. I had embarrassed myself for her
and she was acting as though she was mute. I didn't know whether to slap her or
flat out abuse her.

"This is Nathan," I eventually said, my voice
thick with contempt.

It got her to raise her head to him, and mumble a
greeting.
Nathan, instead of being as irritated as I was,
smiled and looked at her like she was the cutest thing since Oreos.
He
asked her a question, she answered, and they took it from there. I looked away
and left them to it.

Nathan participated more fully than I would have
expected him to. He spoke in his usual quiet voice, but it was more than enough
to continuously draw giggles from Kate. It sounded like they were having so
much fun that at a point, I had to look up from the book that I had been
pretending to be engrossed in to see what was happening.

He was saying something about volleyball and she was
grinning like an idiot, all traces of shyness gone. He had completely charmed
her, making little jokes that made her laugh and made my eyes widen.

He can actually
be this warm?
I wondered. Three seconds after meeting Kate he was acting
like they were best friends, but it took us countless accidents to get to the
point where we could even be civil with one another. The distaste and look of
betrayal was apparently obvious in my gaze, because he smiled as he glanced up
at me and said, "You can't blame me. She’s cool."

Kate giggled again and I made sure to send her a look
that warned her to control herself. I picked up my novel and tried to shut them
out.

"Ahem," I heard him clear his throat, and I
looked up to meet his gaze, and Kate's sparkling eyes.

"Um,
My
Blood Approves
?" he asked, referring to the title of my novel.

"Do me a favor and mind your own business
Nathan," I said.

He smiled, but Kate on the other hand was shocked at my
tone; she couldn’t seem to understand how anyone could be rude to Nathan.

"Lenora ..." she chided and I thought about
pounding her head into the table. They returned to their chat, but when Kate
said something to him and he bent down to plant a soft peck on her cheek,
everyone froze, especially me. Somehow, my book left my hands and clattered
noisily as it landed on the wooden table.

Nathan got up immediately after that, and without even
a glance at me he walked back to his seat. Kate on the other hand had turned
every shade of red. I felt a pain come into a corner of my chest that made me
feel as if my heart was splitting into two.

Ignoring it, I picked my book back up, and told myself
that she had to have been the one that had requested the kiss. Her friends
however didn’t think so; they were barely able to keep their excited voices
down as they jostled her.

She was the star for today;
Alexandre
Roque
had kissed her.

The weather was warm the next
Monday morning, so at lunchtime, I was sitting in the courtyard and getting
ready to dive into my meal. Class had barely registered in my memory since I
hadn't been able to stop thinking about the kiss that Nathan had given to Kate,
and how he’d properly ignored that I existed.

It bothered me more how much it had plagued me since
then, but no amount of control on my part had been able to reign in the
disheartening thoughts. Now however, and for a change, I was more than happy to
focus on my beautiful golden French fries. But five minutes later, I was
interrupted.

"Nora," I heard Nathan call. I turned around
and saw him coming towards me. My mouth was loaded with fries so to salvage
some shred of
dignity,
I looked away and chewed faster
so that I could send the food down my throat before he reached my table.

“Don’t call me Nora,” I said when he reached me. I
tried not to notice how good he looked.

“Oh, so we’re back to that?” he asked, but before I
could answer, he sat down and drew my tray to him.

"Hey, give that back," I said as I reached
for it, but he held it away and parted his lips to give me the most beautiful
smile I had seen yet. I cringed.

"What is wrong with you?" I complained.
"You're all smiles these days."

He chuckled and grabbed my drink from the tray before
returning it to me. I watched him take a sip from
my
straw and my insides began to melt. I should have been irritated
but at that moment, all I wanted was to take the cup back and wrap my lips
around it too.

You’re crazy!
I
yelled in my head, and shook it to dispel my lunacy so that I could work up an
appropriate reaction.

"
Eww
, that touched my
mouth," I said in a flat tone.

He let go enough to reply to me, but wrinkled his nose
first. "I know right." And then he teased. "You know, in a way,
we just kissed."

I gave him a dry look, but the way he’d said the last
word made me swallow. Unrepentantly, he returned his mouth to the straw and
took a long slug before he pushed the cup back to me. I pushed it aside.

"So," he started, "why are you always
alone?"

"Because I want to be," I answered
sarcastically before smiling at him. "Could you please leave?"

He gave me a hurt look. "You chase me down for
weeks and now you can't stand my presence?"

I gaped at him. "What do you mean I chased you
down?"

He just chuckled and continued, "Kate is the only
one I've ever seen you with and you're still not very close. It’d be nice if
you made an extra effort in getting to know people."

I pushed more fries into my mouth, and slapped his
hands away when he reached forward to grab some. He tried again, but this time
got away with it.

"I don't need anyone
Nathan,
I'm fine on my own."

"Maybe, but you’re definitely not fine on your
own,” he said, amused. I shook my head and looked away from him, only to meet
the curious stares of a few people all over the yard.

Why am I only
just noticing this now?
I complained under my breath and I frowned when I
saw his hand again reaching for a fry. I slapped it away, but he ignored the
smack and came away with a few that he put straight into his mouth.
 
Sparkling with a wicked glint, his eyes
caught and held my glare, but neither of us looked away.

My breathing became ragged when seconds
later,
we were still staring at each other as we silently
chewed our food. I turned away, and dragged the cup to myself for a drink.

He put his hand on mine, intending to say something but
just when he started to speak, he looked up and saw something that made him
stop. Moving his hand away from mine, he lowered his eyes for a second and when
he raised them up again, he had on another smile. It was a small one, and was
so different from the ones I was accustomed to, that it surprised me.

It seemed genuine but there was a restraint to it, and
as I heard the soft giggles that came up behind me, I understood why. I
returned my mouth to the straw to hide my smile.

His blue eyes move upwards and so did mine as Kate came
to stand by our table, three other girls with her.

“Hi
Alexandre
,” she said with
breathy excitement, and I almost laughed out at the mouthful. I was so used to
calling him
Nathan
that it seemed
weird when people called him
Alexandre
.

"Hello," he said in a very quiet voice that
had the right effect on all of them, including me. Our faces heated up, and
Kate, feeling incredibly welcomed by his politeness, slid in next to him. The
other girls came in after her and she somehow forgot to acknowledge my
presence, as did the others.

They looked up at Nathan as though he had created the
world, while he had his head casually turned away, looking as though even if he
did, he regretted it. It warmed me how wary he was of attention and I almost
began to pity him. But I reserved my concern when I saw how well he was able to
mask it.

To them he probably looked the same but I could see his
unease – the tightness of his lips as he smiled, and the stiffness of his
shoulders. He heard my chuckle and turned to see me lift the straw to my lips.
He snatched the cup out of my grasp.

“Nathan!” I complained, but he just ignored me and put
his lips over it.

Kate and the girls watched with widened eyes as he took
a sip, and then returned it to me. They hadn’t realized that we were
that
familiar, not that I’d realized it
either but at that moment, I didn’t mind. He took the opportunity of their
surprise to get up from the bench.

He held out his hand to the girls, who quickly
recovered from their surprise, and took turns in introducing themselves;
Beatrice, Ana, and the last one’s name I didn’t bother to catch. He shook
Kate's hand last and then nodded at me.

I frowned at him as he walked away, while the other
girls giggled and whispered amongst themselves. Kate, now recovered from her
post-Nathan dazzle, finally noticed me.

"Lenora," she said, in a breathy voice.

I gave her a surprised look. "Oh, so you see me
now," I said, and the smile left her face. "Are you sure I'm still
not invisible?"

"Don't be silly," she said. I just shook my
head and placed my mouth on the straw but tried not to make it obvious that I
lingered on it.

Kate's narrowed gaze met mine so I took one last draw,
and lifted my lips from it. "Alex just placed his lips on that." she
said.

I shrugged. "So? It's mine."

"Well, it's just weird," she said.
"Especially from you.”

"Leave me alone Kate," I groaned, and
returned to my now cold meal.

Her roommates said their goodbyes to her, and left the
table.

"So,” she said when they’d left. “Do you think he
likes me?"

I stopped chewing. "Are you kidding me?" I
asked, and she cringed from the show of mashed food still in my mouth. “You did
this all through last evening. Do you want me to start avoiding you?"

"Well you know him," she continued sorely.
"And I was just wondering if he's said anything today."

I sighed and tried to dull the harshness that I knew
was going to be in my tone. "No Kate," I answered. "He hasn't
said anything."

I watched her face turn somber so I added, "He
doesn't talk to people much, and so far he's been open with you, so I'm sure
that's a good thing."

I said
‘thing’
instead of
‘sign’
because I didn't
want it to prompt her to start expecting anything. But from her delight, I
doubted she noticed the difference.

"Are you serious
Lennie
?"
she squealed, and she started her jabber again.

When I couldn’t take it anymore, I stood up and with my
tray in hand, found my way out of there. I returned to my classroom to eat my
lunch, finishing it just as the bell rang and our chemistry teacher walked in.