The Best of Daughters (20 page)

Pushing past him, she marched into the living room. A candle flickered in the middle of a deal table littered with used crockery, newspapers and what looked like small pieces of a car engine. Bowman shoved his feet into his shoes, running his hand through his sleep-tangled hair in a vain attempt to tame it into shape. ‘I'd ask you to come in, but you've already done so. Is there a problem?'

‘I'd say you're the one who has a problem, Mr Bowman.' Daisy faced him, holding on to her anger. In his sleepy dishevelled state he looked suddenly much younger and defenceless. He was watching her warily and she had to quell a surge of sympathy for him. Instead of wanting to pummel him with her fists, she longed to put her arms around him and hold his head to her breast. But that was ridiculous. She remembered Ruby's condition and her admission that Bowman was already married. She hardened her heart with difficulty. ‘You know why I'm here, of course.'

‘To collect the spare part for the Humberette?' His lips twitched and the old familiar twinkle in his eyes teased and tormented her.

‘Don't try to be funny,' she said angrily. ‘Ruby is expecting your child. What are you going to do about it?'

He pulled out a chair, dusting it off with his shirt sleeve. ‘Won't you sit down, Miss Lennox? How about a cup of tea, or would you like something stronger? It's a bitter cold morning to be out and about so early.'

She shook her head. ‘I don't want to sit down, nor do I want anything from you other than your promise to stand by Ruby and her baby.'

He shrugged his shoulders. ‘I can't marry Ruby, as I'm sure she told you. I'll do my best to support her and the child, but I'm not a rich man.'

‘You told her that you're married. Is that true?'

‘Unfortunately, yes. She was in the family way, although I wasn't sure if the kid was mine. I suppose I felt sorry for her and we got married but it went
wrong from the start. She told me that I wasn't the father and she'd only married me to save face. She left me soon after the wedding and went back to live with her family. That was five years ago and I've hardly seen her since.'

‘Being married didn't prevent you from ruining Ruby's life. How many children have you fathered in that way, Mr Bowman?'

He grinned. ‘Can't say I've ever kept count, miss.'

‘You're a bounder and a cad.'

‘You didn't seem to think so back in the summer. As I remember it you and me were good together, Daisy.'

‘How dare you bring that up? You're not a gentleman.'

‘I never pretended to be anything of the sort. And you forgot you was a lady sometimes, as I recall with great pleasure.'

He took a step closer and his eyes burned into hers causing her pulses to race and her knees to tremble. She moved backwards but the kitchen table was in the way and she was trapped. ‘Don't come any nearer, Bowman.'

‘I might not,' he said slowly, ‘but on the other hand I might.' He seized her round the waist and pulled her into his arms. His mouth found hers, hard and demanding. She fought and struggled but it was a losing battle. The whole intoxicating scent of him filled her nostrils and all her good intentions flew out of the window. In those few mindless moments she felt nothing but the primeval urge to give herself to the dominant male. Their physical beings seemed to melt into one seething mass of uncontrollable passion, but
in the end the need to catch her breath brought her abruptly back to reality. She pushed him away.

‘That was an unspeakable thing to do.'

He nodded, a lazy smile curving his lips. ‘But thoroughly enjoyable, and don't try to deny it, Miss High and Mighty.'

Daisy waved her left hand in front of his face. ‘I'm engaged to be married. You've no right to take advantage of me in this way.'

He threw back his head and laughed. ‘Excuse me, ma'am, but you're the one who marched into my house at daybreak, catching me half dressed and in my stockinged feet. If that wasn't an invitation to a tumble, I'd like to know what is.'

Daisy was shaking from head to foot and she knew she was blushing furiously, which only made matters worse. What rankled even more was the fact that he was right in one respect. She should never have come here at all, let alone under the cover of darkness, and if she were to be completely honest she knew in her heart that it was the sudden desire to see him again that led her to undertake such a reckless course. She edged away, moving towards the door. ‘You're mistaken,' she said icily. ‘I am very much in love with my fiancé, but I can see that you might have misunderstood my reasons for coming here.'

Bowman sprawled on a chair, eyeing her with some amusement. ‘You disappoint me, Daisy. I thought you were lusting after my manly body.'

‘You are quite disgusting.'

His expression darkened and he leaned forward,
holding her gaze with a straight look. ‘So why did you come exactly? You knew that I couldn't make an honest woman of Ruby even if I wanted to.'

‘So you were just amusing yourself with her. Is that it?'

‘I've never forced a woman to do anything she didn't want to. Ruby was a willing partner.' He stood up, pushing the chair aside. ‘I've told you that I'll do my bit, so why don't you go back to your posh soldier-boy and stop interfering.'

His harsh words swamped her like a shower of iced water and she gasped, staring at him in disbelief. ‘Do you dislike me so much?'

He was at her side before she had a chance to open the door and he placed his hands on her shoulders, looking deeply into her eyes. ‘You won't stop until you force it out of me, will you, Daisy? You know and I know that we were made for each other.' He laid his finger on her lips as she opened her mouth to protest. ‘That's why you keep coming back for more, even though you'd never give yourself to a man like me. I bedded Ruby because I knew I couldn't have you.' A rueful smile lit his dark eyes. ‘Don't look so shocked, girl. What I'm trying to tell you is that I love you. I fell in love with you the moment I first saw you, and I think you felt the same.'

She shook her head, attempting to twist free from his grasp and failing. ‘You're just saying that,' she whispered. ‘You don't mean it.'

He opened the door and thrust her outside into the bitter cold of a winter dawn. ‘I meant every word of
it, and that's why you've got to go now before anyone sees you.' He slammed the door in her face and she heard him groan loudly and beat his fists on the wooden panels. She stood as if frozen to the spot, but the sound of footsteps approaching along the street galvanised her into action. She fled in the direction of home, running as fast as her legs would carry her. She did not stop until she reached the coach house. Gasping for breath she went inside and collapsed on the front seat of the Humberette, clutching the wheel and sobbing as if her heart would break.

Everything he said had been true. She had gone to Bowman's cottage telling herself it was for Ruby's benefit when all along she had secretly been yearning to see him again. He was like a drug that once taken had become an addiction. He thrilled her and sent her senses spiralling out of control. She ached for him physically, even though she had no experience and only a vague notion of what passed between man and wife in the intimacy of the marriage bed. She knew that she was no better than Ruby. If Lady Pendleton had not spirited her off to London for four months she might well have ended up in the same dire predicament.

She leaned her head against the wheel, breathing deeply until the storm of grief and shame eased and she regained her self-control, but she felt his presence even though he was nowhere near. The smell of the workshop was in the air she breathed just as it had clung to Bowman's hair and clothes. Sitting in the machine on which he had worked for so many hours
brought him closer than she could have imagined. She felt in her pocket for a hanky and blew her nose. It was Christmas Eve and Rupert was due home later in the day. There was much to do and she must put all thoughts of Bowman from her head, if not her heart.

She slid off the seat and made her way out of the coach house and round the side of the house to the back door. Pausing only to pat her hair in place, she opened the door and went inside. Ruby pounced on her as she entered the kitchen. ‘You've been ages. What happened?' She recoiled, staring at Daisy's face. ‘What's the matter, miss? You've been crying. Has that brute upset you?'

Daisy glanced round anxiously. ‘Is Iris here?'

‘No, she's very late. Tell me what happened. If he's done anything to make you cry I'll go down there right away and give him a piece of my mind.'

‘Don't get excited, Ruby. It's bad for the baby. I made a mistake going to see Bowman but he was quite reasonable, for him.'

‘Then what's wrong?'

‘I don't know. Everything, I suppose. It's just not fair. None of it is fair.' Daisy stiffened as she heard the click of the latch on the outside door. ‘That must be Iris. I don't want her to find me in the kitchen. We'll talk later.' She hurried from the kitchen without giving Ruby a chance to argue. She raced upstairs to her room and shut the door, leaning against it and covering her face with her hands to muffle a sob. What had she done? Her cheeks burned and her heart pounded against her ribs like a wild animal trying to escape. At best she had made a complete fool of herself. At the
very worst she had been forced to face the fact that far from being over, her affair with Bowman had barely begun.

She paced the floor, wringing her hands. Life had been so much easier in London, especially since she had joined the FANY. While she was training she had felt part of something great and important, but returning home had brought her face to face with feelings that she had strenuously denied in the past. Even so she could not quite believe that she had fallen in love with a man who was so far beneath her in every way. She had agreed to marry Rupert, her childhood sweetheart, for that was what he was in essence. Rupert was everything she could ever want in a husband, but her pulses did not race whenever she saw him. Her body did not cry out to be possessed by him, and his kisses did not send her into paroxysms of delight.

Her heart felt as though it would explode and she could not breathe. She went to the window and flung the casement open, leaning out to take deep breaths of the frosty morning air. A sulky dawn had split the dark sky open to reveal heavy clouds that threatened snow. There was a smoky taste to the air and as the sharp east wind fanned her hot cheeks she began to feel calmer. Rupert would arrive some time later in the day and she must greet him as if nothing had changed. He deserved better than a wife whose heart belonged to another, but she would take care that he never discovered the truth. She closed the window and went to her dressing table to tidy her windblown hair. She stared at her reflection and was amazed to see the face
of innocence gazing back at her. None of her inner turmoil was apparent and for that she could only be thankful. She hoped that Rupert would not look into her eyes and see her troubled soul. Only she herself and Bowman knew her dark secret, but she was not sure whether she could trust him to keep it to himself. Perhaps she ought to confess everything to Rupert and start married life with a clear conscience.

Daisy was standing on a stepladder decorating the Christmas tree that Jimmy Gurney had felled from the woods and delivered to Rainbow's End earlier that morning. As she reached up to put the star on the topmost branch she heard the sound of a motorcar engine.

‘I'll bet that's Rupert,' Bea said, running to the window. ‘Yes, it is. How handsome he looks. I wish Jimmy would enlist in the army so that I could see him in uniform.'

‘I'm sure you don't really,' Daisy said, standing back to admire her efforts. ‘You wouldn't want him to be sent into battle.'

‘There won't be a war. Father says so.' Beatrice hurried from the room, calling over her shoulder. ‘I'll let him in. You've got pine needles in your hair, Daisy. Look in the mirror and you'll see.'

Daisy raised her hand to her forehead and grimaced as she felt the tiny green spikes sticking out of her hair. She was halfway across the room when Rupert appeared in the doorway. He held out his arms. ‘Daisy Bell. How wonderful you look.' He rushed forward to
give her a hug and brushed her lips with a kiss. ‘I've missed you so much, my dear girl. Have you missed me?'

‘Of course she has,' Beatrice said, grinning broadly. ‘Kiss her properly, you idiot. Don't mind me.'

He chuckled. ‘Thanks, Bea. I don't need permission to kiss my fiancée.' He threw his peaked cap onto a chair and claimed Daisy's mouth in a tender kiss.

She struggled free, laughing. ‘Not in front of the child. She's much too young to see such things.'

Bea stuck her tongue out. ‘I'm nearly seventeen I'll have you know, and quite grown up for my age. I've been kissed.'

‘I wouldn't let Mother hear you say that or she'll never allow you out of the house again.' Daisy met Rupert's enquiring look with an attempt at a smile. ‘It's wonderful to have you home again. Won't you take a seat? I'm sure that Bea would love to fetch something for you from the kitchen.'

He sat on the sofa, pulling Daisy down beside him. ‘No, I'm fine, thanks. Parkin picked me up at the station so I went home first, said hello to Mother and then I came here to see my beloved.' He raised her hand to his lips. ‘How are you, darling? You look a bit pale.'

‘She's healthy as a horse,' Bea said dispassionately. ‘Daisy has never had a day's sickness in her life.'

Torn between annoyance and laughter, Daisy pointed at the door. ‘Kitchen, Bea. Go and see if lunch is ready. We might persuade Rupert to stay and eat with us after all.'

‘Oh, all right. Spoilsport.' Bea flounced off, stamping
her feet on the polished oak floorboards as she crossed the hallway.