The Courtship Basket (22 page)

Rachel froze in place. Mike was standing close to the young woman, sharing an evident familiarity with her. Rachel's stomach twisted as Mike touched her arm and then leaned in close and whispered to her. The girl was beautiful, much more striking than Rachel could ever hope to be. Dressed in a dusty rose-colored frock, the young woman had clear porcelain skin, powder-blue eyes, and red hair peeking out from under her prayer cover. The girl touched Mike's arm and then whispered back to him as he nodded in response to whatever she said.

Rachel's stomach soured and bile rose in her throat. Mike
apparently cared about this beautiful young woman. He knew her well, and from the way he touched her arm, she shared more than Rachel could ever share with him.

Rachel hugged her arms around her middle as her body began to shake with a familiar betrayal. It was happening all over again. Mike was seeing another girl behind her back—just as David had done. Mike had taken her heart and smashed it into a million pieces. Their relationship was over before it ever really had a chance to begin.

“Rach,” Emily whispered, placing her hand on Rachel's arm. “Calm down.”

Rachel pulled away from Emily, turned around, and ran down the hallway and through the showroom. She wove her way through the knot of customers before she banged through the front door. As she hit the sidewalk outside the store, a cool spray of drizzle sprinkled her face, mixing with the warm tears pouring down her cheeks.

“Rachel!” Emily called, rushing after her. “Wait up!”

Rachel slowed her pace, allowing her sister to catch up with her. Emily grabbed Rachel's arm and spun her around.

“Hold on,” Emily insisted, huffing and puffing to catch her breath. “You don't know who that woman is. You can't assume Mike is seeing someone else.”

“Please, Emily.” Rachel spat the words at her. “I'm not stupid.” She pointed in the direction of the store. “He obviously is close to that
maedel
. He's never been that intimate with me. He's never whispered to me or touched my arm.” She swiped at her angry tears. “He's seeing her. It's just like David. Only it's worse.” She sniffed as her voice trembled. “I thought what Mike and I had was going to be something real, more real than what I had with David.”

“Stop it.” Emily placed her hands on Rachel's forearms. “You shouldn't assume the worst without talking to him first. That
maedel
could be a
gut freind
who is just as concerned as you are about his
dat
.”

“No,” Rachel said, her voice louder than she expected. “That
maedel
is
schee
. He obviously cares about her. He cares about her more than he cares about me.” Something painful twisted in her chest as she said the words. “She's the reason he hasn't called me to tell me how his
dat
is. He'd rather tell her and be with her instead of with me. I don't blame him.”

“You don't know that,” Emily said, her voice seeping with frustration. “You always jump to the worst conclusions without getting all the facts. You should give him a chance to explain.”

“There's nothing to explain.” Rachel yanked her arms out of Emily's grasp and marched toward the grocery store. “Let's get the groceries and go home.”

“Rachel.” Emily jogged to catch up. “You really should go back there and talk to him.”

Rachel ignored her sister and stepped into the grocery store. Taking a deep breath, she poured herself into her shopping list and tried to ignore her fracturing emotions.

M
IKE STUCK HIS PAINTBRUSH INTO THE PUNGENT CLEAR
stain and moved it over the lighthouse. He worked mechanically as his mind swirled with thoughts of his father. Although
Dat
seemed stronger this morning, he still wasn't able to lift himself out of bed and had developed a cough overnight. Mike didn't like the sound of it. He planned to ask Marie to mention it to the nurses at dialysis on Monday.

Mike offered to stay home, but Marie insisted she could take care of everything. Mike finally agreed to go to work, but he instructed Marie to call him if she needed him to come home.

Mike thought about Rachel as well. He longed to call and
apologize to her, but he'd been so busy since he walked through the door this morning that he hadn't had a chance to get to the phone. He was catching up on his work when Janie stopped by to see him. She'd been worried about his father since she'd heard about his episode last night. Janie was going to head over to his farm to relieve Marie, but she wanted to check in with Mike before she went over there.

“Hey.” Sam appeared behind him.

Mike spun to face him. He pushed his mask to the top of his head, placed the lid on the stain, and then balanced the brush on top. “I didn't see you there.”

Sam sat on a stool beside Mike. “I was wondering how your visit went with Rachel. I didn't see her leave.”

“Rachel?” Mike glanced around the shop. “Where is she? I haven't seen her.”

Sam blinked and paused. “Isn't she a pretty brunette with brown eyes?”

Mike nodded. “That's right.”

“She had a shorter blonde with her,” Sam continued.

“That's her
schweschder
Emily.” Mike looked around the shop again. “Where are they? Did you tell them to come back and see me?”

“
Ya
, I did.” Sam gave him a befuddled expression. “So, you never saw her?”

“No.” Mike shook his head. “I've been back here working. I've only spoken to Janie. When did Rachel stop by?”

Sam craned his neck, turning toward the large clock hanging at the back of the shop. “I guess it's been almost two hours. I wanted to check on you sooner, but it's been crazy up front.”

Mike brushed his hands down his blue work shirt as bemusement overtook him. “Why didn't she come in here to talk to me?”

Sam shrugged as he slid off the stool. “I don't know. Maybe you should give her a call?”

“
Ya
, I will after I finish staining this lighthouse.” Mike slipped the mask over his nose and mouth and then picked up the paintbrush. Sam waved before heading toward the showroom. While Mike finished staining the lighthouse, he tried to figure out why Rachel had come to the shop to see him but didn't speak to him.

Why would she leave without saying hello? Unless she had planned to tell him she was upset about his ignoring her last night or assumed he was too busy when she saw him working, it just didn't make sense.

R
ACHEL LEANED DOWN AND WRENCHED ANOTHER HARDY
, green weed from the garden. The hot midday sun beat down on her neck, burning into her skin. By the time Rachel and Emily had exited the grocery store, the rain had stopped and the sun had poked out from behind the gray clouds. Rachel refused to answer Emily when she tried to discuss the scene with Mike at the shop during the ride home. Instead, Rachel stared out the van window and held her breath to choke back more threatening tears.

When she arrived home, Rachel helped put away the groceries and then hurried outside. Despite the mud, she'd spent nearly an hour pulling weeds. The tedious task did little to drown her heartache or stop the despair that had taken root in her soul. She'd managed to avoid her mother's and Emily's concerned expressions by telling them she needed to work in her garden. Since then, she'd kept her back bent and her hands working. She didn't want to hear their platitudes or encouragement. Instead, she yearned to stay busy for now. She knew the tears would come as soon as she stopped moving.

“Rachel!”
Mamm
called from the phone shanty. “You have a phone call!”

Rachel brushed hands down her black apron as she stalked through the garden and toward the barn. “Who is it?” she called to her mother.

“It's Mike,”
Mamm
said, gesturing to the small shed where the phone was. “I told him I'd get you.”

Rachel's throat dried and anguish bit into her shoulder blades at the mention of his name. “Please tell him I can't come to the phone.”

Mamm
's eyebrows pinched together. “Why would you do that?” “I can't talk to him.” Rachel shook her head. “Please tell him I'm not available or that I went to the store.” She squeezed
Mamm
's arm. “I know it's a sin to lie, but I can't talk to him. Please,
Mamm,
I'm begging you to tell him I'm not here.”

Mamm
paused, studying Rachel. “Why won't you talk to him?”

“I don't want to get into it right now,
Mamm
.” Rachel's voice shook. “I promise I'll explain everything later. Please tell him I can't come to the phone. Tell him I don't feel well and I'm going to my room to lie down. I'll go right now. Please,
Mamm
. I'm begging you.”

Mamm
shook her head. “I can't believe I have to do this for you. It's just like when Jason was trying so desperately to talk to Veronica, and she wanted me to shoo him away.”

Rachel took a deep breath. “Please.”

Mamm
shook a finger at her as if she were a petulant child. “I'll tell him you're not feeling well, but you're not going to your room. You're going to sit down and explain everything to me when I get off the phone with him.”

“All right.” Rachel's voice trembled. She stood in the doorway as
Mamm
lifted the receiver to her ear.

“I'm sorry, Mike,”
Mamm
said. “Rachel isn't feeling well. Could I give her a message for you?” She listened for a moment. “I will tell her. How's your
dat
doing today? Oh,
gut
. I'm glad he's feeling better. I will pass the message along to Rachel. Good-bye.”

She hung up and faced Rachel, a frown turning down the corners of her mouth. “Mike was very disappointed you weren't
able to speak with him. He said he was sorry he missed you at the shop.”

Rachel gave a derisive snort while crossing her arms over her chest. “Is that right?”

“Rachel,”
Mamm
said, shaking her head. “I don't understand what's going on. You said you loved him last Saturday night when he and his family came over for supper. What happened between you two?”

Rachel pointed toward the house. “Could we please go inside and discuss this over a cup of tea?”

Mamm
nodded. “Of course.”

Twenty minutes later, Rachel cradled a warm cup of tea in her hands as she finished explaining what had happened at the shop.
Mamm
sipped her tea and empathy glimmered in her blue eyes as she listened.

“He betrayed me the same way David did,” Rachel said, her voice shaky with fresh emotion. “I thought Mike was different. I thought the friendship he and I were developing was stronger than what David and I had, but I was completely wrong.” She sniffed and stared at the tea rippling in her cup like waves in a tiny lake. “I've spent all these weeks cultivating our friendship. I've sent meals over to him, and I've listened when he needed an ear. But in the end, all I've gained is another hole in my heart.”

“
Ach, mei liewe
.”
Mamm
reached across the table and rubbed Rachel's hand. “You've done nothing wrong. You have a loving spirit. You've helped his family, and that's what we're called to do.”

Rachel blotted her teary eyes with a tissue from her pocket. “I know it's what we're called to do, but why does it hurt so much?”

“I still believe he loves you.”

“What?” Rachel's eyes snapped to
Mamm
's.

“He was truly disappointed when you wouldn't come to the phone,”
Mamm
said. “He told me his cousin Sam said you'd stopped
by the shop, and he was sorry he didn't get to see you. He wanted to apologize for missing you, and he wanted to apologize for not getting to talk to you last night.”

Rachel's thoughts turned to Raymond. “How is his
dat
?”

“He said his
dat
is still weak, but he's in better spirits.”

“Oh,
gut
.” Rachel cleared her throat while considering Mike's sudden change in behavior. “I think I misread Mike. I believe he only wants to be my
freind
. I'm going to still be the best teacher I can to John, but I need to distance myself from the family. Malinda warned me not to get too close, and I should've listened to her from the beginning.” She wiped away another wayward tear. “I'll be all right. I just can't trust myself. I get too attached and then I wind up hurt.”

“You did nothing wrong,”
Mamm
repeated while patting her hand again. “I think you need to talk to him and tell him how you're feeling. Don't give up on him so easily.”

Rachel shook her head. “I can't put myself through any more pain. I need to back away, at least for a little while.”

Mamm
nodded. “Fine. Do what feels right, but don't take your frustration out on John. He's innocent in all of this.”

Rachel gaped. “I would never do that. He's my student.”

“
Gut
,”
Mamm
said before drinking more of her tea.

As Rachel sipped her own tea, the warm liquid seemed a weak balm for her aching soul. She longed to find comfort to wash away the pain that tore at her heart.

L
ATER THAT AFTERNOON
R
ACHEL PACED IN THE KITCHEN
. Although she'd finished washing the lunch dishes, her mind continued to whirl with images of Mike and the pretty redhead at the shop. Her heart ached with pain over losing Mike, and she needed something to take her mind off him. She remembered seeing a
stack of devotional books on her mother's dresser when she put clean laundry in her parents' bedroom the other day. She longed to push away the painful thoughts of Mike and his beautiful girlfriend. Maybe a good book would help.

Mamm
had gone with Emily to the harness shop to help with the accounting books and she didn't want to bother her. She was sure
Mamm
wouldn't mind if she looked at the books. Rachel walked into her parents' bedroom next to the family room. She found the stack of books still on
Mamm
's dresser and sifted through them in search of one that would somehow ease her heartache. None of the books piqued her interest, however, and she sank down onto the corner of her parents' bed and covered her face with her hands.

What could she do to keep her thoughts away from Mike? What could possibly take away the sadness that had drowned her the moment she saw Mike talking to that
maedel
?

She dropped her hands in her lap and looked around. Her eyes widened when she saw
Mamm
's hope chest sitting under the window at the far side of the room. She suddenly remembered that the hope chest had been missing from the attic when she was up there looking for the basket. She wondered why
Mamm
had moved the hope chest downstairs.

This was the same chest where Veronica had found their grandmother's raspberry pie recipe. When had it been moved?
Dat
must have carried it down while Rachel was at school. She wondered if there were any books in the hope chest that could at least serve as a balm to her despair.

Rachel crossed the room and tried to lift the lid, but it was locked. She looked on
Mamm
's dresser and found a key sitting in a small glass bowl. She slipped it into the lock, turned it, and the lock clicked open.

Rachel pushed up the lid and rummaged through the chest.
She lifted a quilt and saw a cross-stitch pattern in a loop at the bottom of the hope chest. The design had a colorful butterfly bathed in purple, blue, and pink, with words below.

Happiness is like a butterfly:
The more you chase it, the more it will elude you,
but if you turn your attention to other things,
it will come and sit quietly on your shoulder.

Rachel studied the words, taking in their meaning, and tears flooded her eyes. She flipped over the cross-stitch and found a note written in neat cursive writing:

Mattie, May this warm your new home and your heart.

All my love,
Mamm

Rachel blinked as tears streamed down her cheek. Her grandmother had made this for her mother. Was it when
Mamm
first married
Dat
?

She closed the hope chest lid and then hugged the cross-stitch to her chest as she sat down on top of the hope chest.

“Rachel!”
Mamm
asked. “What are you doing?”

Rachel stood and spun.
Mamm
was standing in the doorway and studying her intently.

“I finished all the chores, and I thought I might find a book to read that would help me feel better. I looked through your books on your dresser and didn't find one, so then I thought there might be one in your hope chest.” She held up the cross-stitch. “I didn't find a book, but I found this.”

Mamm
cupped her hand to her mouth. “I haven't seen that in years. It used to hang over by the back door.”

“It's beautiful.” Rachel studied the words again, letting them trickle through her mind. “
Mammi
made this for you?”

“
Ya
. She gave it to me when your
dat
and I were first married.”
Mamm
walked over to her and ran her finger over the cross-stitch. “She said she was in a fabric store, and when she saw the pattern, she thought of me.”

“It's
schee
,” Rachel said.
And it's just what I need right now
. Was this
Mammi
's way of reaching out to her? Was
Mammi
trying to tell Rachel everything would be okay and happiness would eventually find its way back into her life? “May I keep it?”

“
Ya
, of course.”
Mamm
gave her a sad smile. “How are you doing?”

Rachel shrugged. “I'll be okay.” She looked down at the hope chest and then back up at
Mamm
. “When did you move the hope chest from the attic to here?”

Mamm
shrugged. “I guess it was a couple of months ago.”

“Why did you move it?”

Mamm
sat on the edge of her bed and faced Rachel. “I felt like I needed to have it closer to me. Where did you find the key?”

Rachel pointed to the dresser. “It was over there in the glass bowl.”

Mamm
got up, locked the hope chest, and then slipped the key into the pocket of her apron. “Let me know before you go into it again.”

“Oh.” Rachel studied her
mamm
's expression, wondering if she'd upset her. “Okay. I will.”

“I'm going to start supper soon.”
Mamm
walked toward the doorway.

“I'll come with you.” Rachel followed her out to the kitchen and wondered why
Mamm
wanted to keep the hope chest locked. Clearly she hadn't wanted Rachel to go through her things, but was there something else in it she didn't want anyone to find?

L
ATER THAT NIGHT
, R
ACHEL PLACED THE CROSS-STITCH ON
her dresser. After climbing into bed, she stared at the ceiling and pondered the quote on the cross-stitch. Her thoughts turned to her grandmother, and tears flooded her eyes. She longed to talk to
Mammi
again. She missed the days when she and her sisters would gather around
Mammi
's kitchen table to eat grilled cheese sandwiches, drink chocolate milk, and talk. If only she could go to
Mammi
's house now and tell her about Mike. What advice would
Mammi
give her?

Rachel rolled to her side and closed her eyes. With tears and anguish constricting her throat, she concentrated on the quote from the cross-stitch and fell asleep.

“R
ACHEL
.” M
ALINDA WHISPERED HER NAME AS THE STUDENTS
took turns reading aloud at their desks Monday afternoon. “This note is for you.” She pointed toward the stack of journals on her desk.

“Oh.” Rachel moved to the desk. “I'll take over the journals, and you handle the reading assignment.”

“All right.” Malinda gave her a questioning expression as she handed her a journal.

Glancing down, Rachel immediately recognized the slanted cursive. The note was from Mike. Her stomach clenched as she lowered herself into the desk chair and took in the note.