The Courtship of Julian St. Albans (26 page)

“Do you want us to stay
outside?” asked James, quite seriously.

Alex chuckled. “No, no, a third Courtship
date isn’t meant to end in bed, you’ll be fine, though I will take over the
living room so you’ll mostly be lurking in the kitchen, I expect.”

“We lurk very
well,” said James with a laugh.

Their waiter showed up then, and they busied
themselves with ordering, chatting familiarly and coming to an agreement on a
nice, big family-style meal with a bit of everyone’s favourites and a lot of
chai. Jacques made them all get mango lassis as well, which amused the waiter,
but he declared that they needed the nutrients and they acquiesced readily
enough. The meal passed like one between friends, and Alex had a pang when he
thought that he might not ever see his two Guardians again, once the case was
done and life had moved on.

“Do you ever keep in touch with your
previous charges?” asked Alex, nibbling on a pakora.

“Sometimes,” said
Jacques.

“We will with you,” said James,
giving Jacques a poke. “We only lose touch with the boring ones.”

“Mostly the
politicians, ugh,” added Jacques.

The thought was derailed when more food arrived
and they started eating in earnest, talking mostly about the food this time,
since Alex would be expected to mostly do the ordering. They’d talked about
food some with Julian last night, and so Alex had an idea already of what he
might like, but it felt good to have someone to discuss his ideas with.

“How’s the leg?” asked James, when
they were sighing happily over sweets and yet more tea.

Alex sighed. “I think it’s improving,
yesterday was a bit too much so it aches today.”

Jacques nodded. “You’ve been limping more
and making that face, like you think it’s all very inconvenient.”

That made them all laugh, and Alex shrugged.
“It is all very inconvenient, but better inconvenienced than dead.”

“So mote it be,” said James, and they
all clinked their teacups in a toast to that very wise sentiment.

~ ~ ~

Alex was grateful for the day of rest, because
the next day brought more PT in the morning and a crime scene in the afternoon,
one that stank of old blood after two days. It had clearly been carnage much
like the artificer, with poor Pembroke helpless against the construct, which
the lab declared was probably something like an earwig.

Alex shuddered at the
thought.

“Let’s see if we can find how it got in
through the wards,” said Alex, proper latex gloves and tools at the ready.
He struck his tuning fork, pacing around first the room and then outside, the
Guardians following along, and Lapointe as well to be sure he didn’t wander in
on anyone in the loo or anything.

Though they did, in fact, find the ward-breach
in a water closet, it was unoccupied at the time. A small leak had worn away
both physical and magical structure, giving just enough space for the construct
to wriggle in and go hunting for its prey.

Alex spared a moment to be grateful for his
freshly checked wards, then showed Lapointe and let the crime scene techs take
over so he could go home.

Home sounded wonderful, and
very safe.

~ ~ ~

Thursday Alex declared he was just damned
tired, and if anyone wanted to talk to him they could come to the flat, which resulted
in a small stream of people and Alex sulking about in his pyjamas and dressing
gown anyway. Lapointe and Smedley spent the morning there together getting
Alex’s various statements put together. Geoff came and claimed the couch for an
hour after lunch now that his healing was nearly done and he’d been released
from the hospital. Victor came by to make sure Alex wasn’t going to embarrass
the family for his third date, and then Henry came by to make annoying comments
about Alex’s wardrobe.

Alex was in a deeply grumpy mood by the time he
kicked Henry out, and so he flopped dramatically on the sofa and called out to
his Guardians, “Pizza?”

Jacques leaned against the kitchen door and
grinned. “Pizza, and then you are going to go meditate or take a bath or masturbate
yourself blind or something, because you are a very cranky man.”

Alex laughed, wry but genuine. “Yeah, I
am,” he agreed, pulling out his phone. “What d’you guys want on
yours? I’ll get three and then we can have leftovers.”

“Something with lots of meat,” said
James, flopping into one of the chairs. “Is there one of those special
things?”

“Yeah, they’ve got
something like that,” said Alex, “How about you?”

Jacques had found the actual menu and was
looking it over. “I’ll have the spinach one,” he said, pointing it
out to Alex before showing James the meat one. When James nodded agreement,
Alex dialled and ordered for all three of them, grateful for delivery service.

Once Alex had hung up, James looked at him with
a not-quite-serious expression and asked, “Will you masturbate yourself
blind?”

“Of course not,”
said Alex, “I’d be even crankier if I was blind.”

They made more juvenile jokes until the pizza
showed up, and Jacques went to answer the door. Everything seemed to go fine
until Jacques went to close the door and they all heard a small but distinct,
“Oof.”

Alex sprang up, whistling to activate the
revealing-wards, and then laughed when he saw who had been caught in them.
“Didn’t think I’d get to it so fast, I take it?” he asked with a
grin.

Con glared up at Alex, annoyed. “I’m back
for m’whiskey, like you promised.”

“Is that the only reason you’re
back?” asked Alex, mostly for the benefit of the two Guardians who looked
like they were about ready to see if pulverised earth sprite was any good on pizza.

Con looked shifty, then sighed. “I might
have some more information to bargain for yeh, if’n you keep them big brutes
away from me tender hide.”

Alex chuckled. “You may
enter as a guest,” he said, “or not at all.”

“Ooh, guest-rights for
little ol’ me?” said Con, perking up. “I’ll take it!”

“So mote it be,” said Jacques,
turning to take the pizzas to the kitchen. Alex whistled the little sprite free
of the wards, and escorted him to the sofa before heading to his lab for the
last bottle of whiskey.

“So,” he said, pleased to see the
little sprite had been offered tea in his absence, “what do you want for
your information?”

Con took a long sip of his tea, making enough
room for a bit of the whiskey Alex was holding, no doubt. “I ain’t decided
yet,” yet said, holding out his hand for the bottle.

Alex trusted he knew his own strength and
handed it over, watching the little sprite do something that made his eyes ache
a bit so that suddenly the cup was full and the bottle a bit more empty, and
sitting on the table. “Not sure how valuable your info is, then,”
said Alex, amused. “Thanks,” he added sheepishly, when Jacques came
over to push him down into a seat and give him food and tea.

“So, this is the earth sprite from the
other night?” asked James. He was still giving Con the side-eye a bit, but
they’d both relaxed since guest-rights were agreed upon.

“Right,” said Alex, between bites of
pizza. “He left the whiskey here in my trust, so I was expecting him
back.”

“I weren’t ‘specting to get caught in yon
wards,” said Con with grudging admiration.

Alex chuckled. “You had a little help last
time, someone planted a ward-breaking device in my dry cleaning.”

“Oooh, so they wasn’t all your fault, the
holes I wriggled through,” said Con with a chuckle. “Well, it turned
out all right for me, din’t it?”

“For both of us,” said Alex, slowing
down now that he had one slice in him. “What sort of thing are you
wanting, a favour, a bauble, more whiskey?”

Con chuckled. “You magic-types is too
worried about this and that to relax and enjoy,” he said, having a nibble
of the bread and honey Jacques had found for him in lieu of the pizza the men
were eating. “Eat your food, Mage.”

“Yes, yes,” said Alex, rolling his
eyes. “But I want to strike this bargain before you leave and take your
information elsewhere.”

“As do I,” agreed
Con.

After that, the four of them concentrated on
enjoying their individual portions, the silence punctuated by requests for
refills of tea or a passed napkin. Once their plates were empty and cups filled
enough times, Con cleared his throat.

“I been thinkin’ I got two bits of info
for you,” he said, swinging his feet over the edge of the sofa in a
strangely childlike manner. “‘Cos I see you ain’t got your fridge fixed
yet, neither.”

“And you did say you knew a brownie who
might help,” said Alex, nodding. “Yes, all right. So, I ask again,
whiskey, favours or trinkets?”

“Well, you see,” said Con, shifting a
bit, “I got this lady-sprite I been tryin’ t’woo, an’ she likes me bits
and bobs wot used to be magical,” he said, pointing to the various bits of
rune-etched metal decorating his clothing, “So I was thinkin’ a properly
magical somethin’ might win her.”

“What sort of something?” asked Alex.
If Con just wanted something that was magic without caring much what it did, it
would be easy enough for Alex to create something for him.

Con shifted again. “Well, you got lotsa
cufflinks an’ tie pins, an’ I were thinkin’ of the ones you got that glow all
special.”

Alex chuckled. “What if I made you
something else that glowed? It doesn’t take a lot of magic, and that way it can
be made to your size, like a pendant or bracelet.”

Con looked surprised, clearly having expected
to be shot down. “You c’n do that?”

Alex chuckled. “Of course I can, I am a
mage,” he said. “If you promise not to touch anything, I’ll take you
into my lab and you can choose a stone that’s not too valuable, and a metal for
the setting, and I’ll do it in the next moon.”

“For that, you ought to get three bits of
information,” said Con thoughtfully, clearly wanting to be known for
striking a fair bargain. “I can owe you one?”

“Three bits of information for one glowing
pendant,” said Alex, holding out his hand. “It’s a bargain.”

Con shook on it, solemn as before, as oaths and
deals were very serious business to the fae. “You’re a good ‘un, I’ll be
sure it’s known,” he said, nodding. “Just let me finish my tea, and
we’ll talk.”

Alex smiled. “Of course,” he said,
sitting back to savour his own cup. He had no worries that the sprite would
leave without imparting his bits of wisdom, he’d shown himself to be a
good-hearted creature, if a bit thieving, and honourable in the way of his
kind.

“So, you been havin’ trouble with yon
nasties comin’ to life an’ goin’ after coppers, right?” said Con, once
he’d set down his empty cup with a satisfied sigh.

“That’s true,”
said Alex, a bit surprised the sprite knew about it.

“Well, I was thinkin’ about how I got into
the first place, with the man who fixes magic bits and bobs, an’ I remembered
him as what caught me before sayin’ that he’d fixed it so I could get in.”
Con gave Alex an expectant look, as if willing him to connect the dots.

“So, you’re saying there’s one of those
ward-disruption devices among the evidence we collected?” asked Alex, just
to be sure.

“I reckon so, ‘specially if it were how he
got me in here,” said Con, looking smug. “If it ain’t in one of them
fancy boxes, it’d mess up everything just a little bit, ‘cos them boxes ain’t
meant to keep stuff out.”

“And you would know
that because?” asked Alex, curiously.

Con just smirked. “I got my ways,” he
said. “Now, let’s look at yon baubles, an’ I’ll tell you how to call the
brownie, he’s expectin’ ya so he won’t be mad.”

“So not his true name, then,” said
Alex with a chuckle. “That’s good, I wasn’t wanting to make a bauble that
fancy while I’m still healing.”

Con chuckled. “No, no, that ain’t mine to
bargain away.” He hopped down from the couch, leaving empty cup, plate and
bottle behind as he tottered over toward the door to the lab. “I admit I’m
right curious ‘bout whatcha got in here.”

Alex followed, cane and all, and opened the
door, which wasn’t locked physically but only responded to his touch. “I
probably should carry you, shoulder maybe?”

“That’ll do,” said Con, clearly
amused. Alex scooped him up and they spent a few moments arranging, but the
sprite clearly didn’t worry much about falling. They rummaged around in Alex’s
strange collection of ingredients, door open invitingly, and by the time they
had a little pile of items for Con’s consideration, the two Guardians had
drifted inside to look around curiously.

“That is a lot of shelves,” said
Jacques, staring at the rows and rows of shelves and cubbies and drawers built
along every inch of wall space, floor to ceiling. Some of them were shallow and
narrow, some were deep and tall, but all of them were full to overflowing with
materials, tools, books, and the other things Alex had collected over the years
that he wanted to keep squirrelled away from the world. “Stay out of that
bookshelf,” he said, gesturing to the one that held the true grimoires,
“and don’t open anything that’s sealed shut, and you can poke around a bit
if you like.”