The Daughter He Wanted (18 page)

Would Alex have been the kind of dad who let an infant nap on his chest? Would he fall asleep telling bedtime stories?

Paige toed off her shoes and put her bag on the counter before crossing the room barefoot to turn off the bright blue TV screen. She watched them, again, for a long moment. Yeah, he’d have been that kind of dad. Would be from this point forward because it was the kind of man he was. Giving, attentive, committed. She swallowed.

Gorgeous in a rumpled tee and jeans.

She still had no clue what this situation was for Alex. Were she and Kaylie replacements? Were they the accessories he’d been missing since his wife died? Or was this something else, some new thing that he was interested in and would tire of later?

She’d been the accessory for her parents and this didn’t feel like that, not even a little bit. Still, she hadn’t realized she’d basically turned into her parents with the law student until she’d broken his heart. She didn’t want to break any more hearts. Didn’t want her own heart broken.

Or Kaylie’s.

Then again, could this be that something new and shiny that would grow into a solid, sustainable relationship? The three of them. Together. A tiny piece of her desperately wanted to believe that.

After only a couple of weeks she was tired of trying to figure out what might happen. Why not just go along for the ride? She’d picked herself up before, she could do it again. Could protect Kaylie from the romantic fallout if that happened. Somehow.

She curled into a corner of the love seat and lay her head against the back. She’d just watch them until they woke, and then send Alex on his way. Coffee could wait just a few more minutes. Her eyes drifted closed.

* * *

P
AIGE WAS HALLUCINATING
. Exhaustion had taken over and she was losing it completely. It was the only explanation for why she smelled bacon in her living room. The only rational one, anyway, because she certainly wasn’t cooking anything and there were no bacon fairies.

A light sizzle-and-pop sound met her ears. Okay, smell hallucinations were one thing. Hearing hallucinations something else entirely. Paige forced her eyes open but that only made the hallucination weirder.

Kaylie sat at the kitchen counter drinking chocolate milk and cutting bright pieces of construction paper. Normal enough.

Alex wore Paige’s pink-and-red floral bib-apron—the one she used when she worked with watercolors rather than oils—and stood over the stove. He also wore the pink umbrella hat she’d bought Kaylie last summer at the concert under the St. Louis Arch.

Definitely not normal.

Paige sat up and shook herself, blinked a few times, but Alex still stood over her stove, spatula in hand, wearing her favorite apron with the umbrella hat on his head.

“What do you think, Kay?” He’d picked up her nickname for their daughter, and hearing it from his mouth made her stomach go wonky. “Are we cleared of rain for the morning?”

Kaylie hopped off the high chair and put her hands on either side of her pressed-against-the-glass face. The day looked bright and sunny from where Paige sat.

“Nope, it’s raining crocodiles and skunks out there.” She climbed back onto her chair. “How’s the grub?”

Alex lifted several pieces of bacon from the skillet and then poured the excess grease into a stoneware coffee mug before cracking a few eggs into the pan and stirring. Scrambled eggs, Kaylie’s favorite. The lump in her throat that had been there since she’d seen them dozing on the sofa threatened to cut off her airway. He cooked. The man cooked and wore silly clothes for her daughter. Paige cleared her throat and swallowed hard against the tears clogging her throat. She wouldn’t cry, not because she was overtired. Not because Alex cooking in her kitchen was completely new yet seemed as normal as the sunny October day outside her little house.

“Morning, Mama.” Kaylie spun around on her chair. “We’re making you breakfast.”

Paige moved into the kitchen. “Good morning, kiddo.” She squeezed the little girl to her side. “How was your night?”

“We played games and watched movies and Alex didn’t let me play ‘Angry Birds’ very much but he did teach me to make a house from my Go Fish cards.” She finished cutting the shape of a daisy from a piece of construction paper and then glued it to another sheet filled with a house, a boat and some wavy-cut lines that were likely grass.

“Nice picture.”

“Thank you. It’s our house, I’m making it for Alex so he doesn’t forget.”

“I’m sure he’ll love it.” There was that lump again, this time in her chest. She hugged Kaylie close and then turned to Alex as he scooped eggs onto plates. “Where is Alison, by the way?”

He handed her a plate. “Probably lying on her stomach in the middle of her bathroom. She called last night with either a bad case of the flu or a bit of food poisoning. So I stayed with Kaylie.”

“You should have called me.” Paige reached for the phone and dialed Alison’s number but there was no answer. She hung up. “I would have come home.”

“And leave the other chaperone solo? It was no big deal.”

“Yes, it was. I hope it wasn’t too trial-by-fire.”

Alex shook his head, but before he could say anything Kaylie rejoined the conversation.

“I still have to draw all of us. The boat isn’t ours but Alex says he likes to fish so I added it in,” she said. “The house has windows shaped like stars, because I like stars, and the flowers are daisies because you like daisies. So the boat is because Alex likes to fish. And he says he’ll swim with us sometime, Mama. Neat, huh?”

“That’s great, sweetpea.” Paige was still trying to take in the very family-like picture Kaylie and Alex made in her kitchen. Where was the anger? The annoyance? She poked around but found nothing except the lump in her chest that meant she was in way over her head. Her daughter was falling in love with her father. Paige couldn’t be angry about that.

Just go with it, Paige. Encourage the bond. He’s not the kind of guy to run out on a kid
.

But was he the kind of guy to drop a woman like a bad habit? She didn’t have an answer for that.

“Kaylie, why don’t you push the papers down the counter so we can eat? You can finish after.”

“I’m not hungry,” she said and glued another daisy to the paper. “I’ll just have milk.”

“You’ll eat first,” he said and put a plate in front of her.

Kaylie clenched her jaw and stared at him for a long minute. Paige waited for the explosion. Kaylie wasn’t much of a breakfast eater, and she definitely had ideas about finishing projects before eating or bathing or even going to the bathroom. But the explosion didn’t come. Kaylie pushed the papers across the counter and picked up her fork. Paige blinked and couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face.

How had he done that?

“Well done.” Paige accepted a plate from Alex. “Nice hat. Most men would look silly wearing a hot-pink umbrella on their head but you make it work.” Alex pushed the hat off his head and set it on the counter, a sheepish grin on his face.

“We were exploring before breakfast,” he explained.

Paige waved a hand. “No worries. I’ve been known to wear tutus and tees for backyard tea parties. Breakfast is usually a battlefield here.”

He lifted a shoulder and then took a bite of his eggs. “We have an understanding.”

“And?”

“I wear silly hats and play games and she follows my instructions when the time comes.”

“Good luck with that when you’re cooking something other than scrambled eggs and bacon.” But she didn’t want to harp on their differences, not when she’d had ten minutes of sleep in the past twenty-four hours. And not when he’d just experienced his solo parenting gig. “How did the veggies and dip go last night?”

Alex smirked and shook his head. “About as you’d expect. We ordered cheese pizza.”

Paige took a bite of bacon and closed her eyes as flavor assaulted her tongue. “You can handle a kid and you can make breakfast. Are you sure you’re a park ranger and not a nanny in disguise?”

“What’s a nanny?” Kaylie piped up, talking around a mouthful of eggs.

Alex chuckled. “Like a babysitter, only a nanny lives with the family. And, no, I’ve never been one. I’ve picked up a few cooking tricks over the years, though. Mostly with breakfast food. I make a mean waffle.”

“Why not a nice waffle?”

Paige giggled. Alex chuckled. Kaylie looked from one adult to the other, a baffled expression on her face.

“It’s a figure of speech. He means that his waffles are really good.”

Alex bent to pick a couple of paper scraps from the kitchen floor, the move outlining his butt and making Paige’s mouth go dry.

Kaylie shook her head as if the adults in the kitchen had lost their minds. She pushed her plate away, announcing that her tummy was full, and then took her papers to the coffee table.

“Literal kid.”

Paige nodded. “Very literal, although by the end of the day she’ll have tried that expression out on at least three inanimate objects.” They finished breakfast in companionable silence. Paige yawned and pushed her plate away. “That was delicious, thank you, but you didn’t have to cook us breakfast.”

“I figured a night with fifty eight-and nine-year-olds deserved a decent breakfast. You look tired.” There was concern in his voice and it nearly did her in. But he’d been here all night, even if she was still considering how fine he looked in the rumpled tee.

Paige swiped at her hair and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “Nothing a little coffee can’t fix.”

Alex gathered the plates and began rinsing them in the sink. “Sleep would be better.”

“I’ll catch a nap when Kaylie has her quiet time this afternoon.” She yawned again and then snapped her mouth closed.

Alex leaned against her counter and shoved his hands into his pockets. “We had a couple of moments, but she’s a great kid. Smart and funny and mostly easy to please. Why don’t you go upstairs and catch that nap now?”

Paige shook her head and leaned back in her chair, needing a little space from the man taking up too much room in her kitchen. Looking too cute in a floral apron, jeans and bare feet. “I’ll be fine, and you’ve done enough. Go home. I’ll drink a pint or two of coffee and sleep like a baby tonight.” She couldn’t hold back another yawn.

Alex pulled her from her seat and started for the stairwell, holding her hand. It felt nice to let him take the lead and she really was too tired to make much of a fight about it. “I made it through the past sixteen hours relatively unscathed. Kaylie’s no worse for the wear. Take another couple hours and get some sleep.”

Bed did sound wonderful. An image of her snuggled against Alex as Kaylie had been when she walked in the door popped into Paige’s mind. She shook herself.
Nope, not going there.
Holding his hand was one thing, snuggling up quite another. But sleep... The room seemed to waver before her and Paige leaned against Alex. Just for a second, until she got her equilibrium back, she promised herself. But his arms were warm and his chest solid. Paige let her eyes drift closed and inhaled, smelling the sunshiney smell that was all him.

“Are you sure? I’ve made it through tired days before.”

Alex took off the apron and held up his hand. “Scout’s honor. I have nothing else going on today. Get some rest. I don’t want to see you back down here before noon.”

Paige stepped onto the bottom step but her foot slipped and she landed smack against Alex’s shoulder again with an “Oof.”

He scooped her up in his arms and started upstairs.

“I’m fine,” Paige protested but he just kept going up, up, up, forcing her to clamp her arms around his divine shoulders. Their faces were mere inches apart and the part of her body held firmly against his muscles sizzled once more. Paige swallowed. At the top of the stairs Alex stopped.

“Which way?”

It took Paige a second to understand what he meant and then she pointed down the hall to her bedroom. “I can walk.”

He didn’t listen and Paige didn’t push. She was too tired and it felt too good to be in his arms, even after that embarrassing slip on the steps. They crossed the threshold to her room and Alex put her down and then sat beside her on the soft pink-and-brown comforter. He reached over and pushed a lock of hair off her forehead.

Paige was caught by his gaze for a long moment before finding her voice. “Thank you for breakfast.”

“My pleasure.” His voice was low in the room. “Thanks for calling me yesterday. It...meant a lot.” He trailed his index finger along her hairline. Paige didn’t push him away. She was caught, mesmerized by his gaze. Fascinated once more by his full lips and the little scar at the corner of his mouth.

“Alex.”

He rested his hand against the mattress and Paige pushed her back against the headboard. “Paige.”

“Th-thank you, for staying.”

Paige didn’t know if she swayed forward or if he leaned in but in the next moment his lips were against hers, moving slowly. Tasting, as if she might be the sweetest fruit. Paige reached her hands to his neck, feeling the smooth skin there and playing with the hair at the back of his head. She didn’t care. Not about his motives or what might happen down the road. For this moment she only wanted to feel him against her. To enjoy a moment when she was Paige and not also Kaylie’s mom.

She refused to feel guilty about that, and slanted her lips more fully against his, opening for him. This was so much more combustible than the kiss at the grocery store. Alex’s tongue slipped inside her mouth and Paige inched forward, wanting more.

Maybe it was more to the point that she was tired of insisting she didn’t want or care about him. She did. A lot. Cared about the man he seemed to be and the way she felt when he was around. The way he seemed to complete their family unit, but more than that, the way he made it okay to be a woman as well as a mom.

Alex cupped his hand around her head and pulled gently on her ponytail, slipping her hair from the band. His tongue played against hers for a long moment and then he pulled back.

He sighed and rested his forehead against hers. “I shouldn’t—”

Paige shook her head and pressed her finger against his full lips.