The Do Over (36 page)

The sun beat down on the pavement, and the heat was oppressive for a late November morning. I counted on a breeze, but I was disappointed as the palms stood still like soldiers guarding their post. Other than the potential chill of air conditioning, there was no reprieve in sight.

I braided my hair as I walked toward Van Dyke's. The sundress I was wearing offered little comfort. Maybe the umbrellas covering the tables outside would provide the respite I was looking for.
Doubtful.
I sighed as I concluded that we'd just have to eat inside.

I didn't want to admit why I wanted to eat along the sidewalk. I wondered if he was running today. A part of me liked seeing him. I convinced myself that it didn't mean anything. We were just two old friends. I felt better about what had happened or hadn't happened between us. I stopped mid-step and shook my head. I had to stop this foolishness.

What the hell am I thinking?
It was so much easier when I hated Rick. Now, it felt complicated. I didn't know how to explain it. I'd enjoyed his company. For a brief moment, it had seemed like we had traveled back in time to when we were together. I had forgotten how he'd caused me so much heartache. It was crazy, but it was no different than all the love affairs I had with my book boyfriends. I wasn't acting on anything. A few stolen moments hadn't meant anything, and it never would.

Anyhow, it had all been coincidences, just like Rick had said. I doubted he was running today. It was too hot. The weather had to be a sign that I needed to let it go.

I looked inside a storefront and checked my reflection in the glass. As I tucked in a few strands of hair that had fallen out of my braid, my phone chirped. I smiled.

Liam: Hey, baby.

Dani: Miss me?

Liam: All the time.

Dani: I love you.

Liam: Love you.

I loved Liam. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me. I closed my eyes, savoring my thoughts of him. My heart fluttered, and my smile widened.

As I opened my eyes slowly, I caught something in the reflection in the glass.
No, it couldn't be.
I turned around, and there he was. Lying on the ledge by the fountain, he clutched his phone against his chest. He looked pathetically delicious.

I walked over and stood above him, casting a shadow. His eyes were closed. He must have felt my presence as he opened one eye to look at me.

Staring down at him, I said, "Is this part of your reinvention? You've become a bum, sleeping near the fountain?" I laughed.

He chuckled. His upper lip curled into a smile, making his cheek dimple. "I'll have you know that I'm many things, but a bum isn't one of them." He used his hand to shield his eyes from the sun. "I'm dying."

"You're dying?" I raised my eyebrow and laughed some more.
He can be so dramatic.
"And why is that?"

"I'd rather not say. Just know that I had my last dying wish fulfilled. You're standing here. You laughing at me in my despair wasn't part of it, but I'll take whatever I can."

"At least I'm giving you a little shade. It's hot as hell. Come on, get up. Let's get you some water." I held out my hand to help him up.

"I have water right here." He splashed his hand in the fountain. "Don't laugh. I pulled my hamstring, and right now, this is the most comfortable position. I'm waiting for it to fix itself."

"What kind of runner are you?" I put my hands on my hips. "Don't you stretch?"

I couldn't believe I was going to do this, but he was injured. I had no other choice. I was a nurse, and I had a duty. "Okay, look, I'm going to help you stretch."

"I think I've died and gone to heaven." He sighed and winked. "Just don't hurt me."

"You're such a baby. Now, which leg is it?"

After I put my purse down, I kneeled on the ledge in front of him. As I moved his sore leg to rest on my shoulder, he clenched his jaw and squeezed his eyes shut. He really was in pain.

"I promise to be gentle," I said.

"
Cariño
, you have your hands on my leg. You can do whatever you want."

His skin glistened in the sunlight as sweat streamed down his face. His hair was slicked back. When I leaned in slightly, his hands reached up and grazed mine. He opened his eyes and met mine.

He smiled wickedly. "I always liked you on top."

"Behave," I scolded.

I reminded myself that I was a professional. However, that didn't stop the pounding in my chest or the blush that kissed my cheeks. The heat wasn't helping the situation either.

"Why? Being bad is so much more fun."

I forced myself to look away.
I'm just helping an old friend.
I released the pressure from his leg, letting it rest on my shoulder and then pressed my body forward, moving his leg toward him. I needed to distract my mind and fast.
What am I doing?

"So, how was your Thanksgiving?" I asked.

"For the most part, it was great. I ran the Turkey Trot, fed the homeless, and ended the night with the family." He propped himself up on his elbows. "That helped. Thanks."

"Liar. You didn't feed the homeless."

"First, I'm a bum, and now, I'm a liar. Your opinion of me is really low and…wrong."

"Nope. I don't believe you."

He slowly swung his legs over and sat up. I moved to sit next to him.

His face brightened, and his perfect smile burst wide. "As a matter of fact, I have proof."

He tapped on his phone and pulled up a picture of him. He was wearing a shower cap and being silly with his arms stretched wide as he stuck out his tongue. He looked like a complete goofball. Rick was playful, but I'd never seen him look this happy.

"It was quite an experience. I think I'm a better man for it," he said.

I nudged him on the shoulder. "I'm proud of you." I'd always known that deep inside, this man was hiding and waiting for the right time to come out. A part of me felt vindicated. I hadn't been delusional when I'd known there was more to him. He'd always had so much potential.

"I sometimes surprise myself. I couldn't believe something that knocked me down a peg could be rewarding. I was so pumped that I'm now getting my mom involved." He nodded his head with a look of satisfaction.

"Who are you? What have you done with the self-centered, arrogant asshole who broke my heart?" I asked, half-joking, as I leaned into him.

I was crazy for even talking to him. It was downright insane to engage in this game. My friends would ring my neck, and I knew Liam wouldn't understand. He'd go ape-shit caveman. The truth was that Rick had hurt me, but
this
made me feel better. It didn't make sense, but for once, I decided not to overanalyze it.

His shoulders slumped, and the corner of his eyes dropped slightly. "I was waiting for you to bring that up." He let out a deep sigh and looked over at me. "I know I hurt you, and saying I'm sorry doesn't seem to be enough. All I can do is try to be a better man and hope that you'll forgive me one day."

I shrugged my shoulders and smiled softly. "I honestly don't know how I feel, except that I don't hate you anymore. This," I said, motioning between us, "has helped." I felt the need to lighten the moment. "Don't think that I'm letting you off the hook. One day, you'll have to give me an acceptable explanation, but for now, it's too hot. I'm melting."

Leaning back, I dipped my hand in the fountain and then splashed him. For a few moments, we were back to that place where the playfulness was familiar, and the hurt started to slip away.

"I should probably move, so my hamstring doesn't tighten up again." He stood up and grimaced. "Thanks for the stretch and the cool down."

"Will you be okay?"

"Me? Of course. I'm Superman. It's going to take a lot more than a pulled hamstring to keep me down." He limped around in a circle.

"Superman," I scoffed. "Says the man who was crying on his deathbed just a little while ago." I laughed as I offered him my shoulder to use as a crutch. "Come on, I'll walk you to your car. Please tell me you didn't park far away."

He placed his arm around my shoulder as mine wrapped around his waist. I could feel his tight abs under my hands.

"Been working out?" I asked, patting his stomach.
Why did I go there?

I had to remind myself that I was helping him. I was being a Good Samaritan. When I tilted up my head, he smiled at me.
Damn that dimple.

"I run, lift weights, and do a little yoga now."

"You and yoga? I can't picture it, but I'll take your word for it." I chuckled. "I love yoga."

"Thanks for taking care of me. You're an angel and normal. It's refreshing," he said, gimping his way to his car.
Why can't Madison be more like this?

"You're welcome, and thank you, I think."

That was the strangest thing anyone had ever said to me. I looked down at my watch to see that I had about fifteen minutes before Macy and Candace would arrive for our last brunch together. I was cutting it close. I ran possible excuses in my head. The most plausible one was that I'd left something in my car and had to go back for it, but I knew that wouldn't work. I finally settled on telling them that it was too hot outside, so I'd decided to read in bed and meet them on time. That seemed like a good excuse. I had to rehearse it a few times until I believed it. I didn't want it to sound like a lie.

"I'm impressed with this transformation of yours."

He straightened his shoulders and smiled proudly.

"You haven't used your colorful language, especially when you were
dying
," I added.

"With so many words in the English and Spanish language, I've found that I don't have to resort to vulgarity when expressing my thoughts or feelings," he said, staring up at the sky with a look of anguish on his face. He looked like he was in a lot of pain.

I laughed and shook my head. "You're so full of shit. You forget that I know you're the master of all salesmen. The question is, what are you selling?"

He reached over and played with my braid. "I'm not full of anything other than wanting to be a better man. I swear. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life because I was an idiot. I'm trying to make better choices and fewer mistakes."

"I want to believe that. If what I've seen is any indication, then I think you're moving in the right direction. You're a good man, Rick." I tucked in a strand of hair that had loosened out of my braid. "I better get going."

"Daniela, thank you for everything. If it weren't for you, I'd still be paralyzed and dying by the fountain. You saved me."

I rolled my eyes and laughed. "Rick, you're laying it on a little thick there. It's sweet but unnecessary."

"You're killing me. I'm being sincere. Seriously, it means a lot to me that you see that I'm not who I used to be." He closed the gap between us and pursed his lips into an impish grin. His eyes darkened, locking on mine, as he placed a kiss on my forehead. "I owe you a Coke. I'll see you next week."

The guilt started to eat away at me.
This is wrong.
I didn't want to lead him on. "Rick…" I glanced over at him with a dull ache building in my chest. "I love him. You need to know that. I really love him." I looked away, my lip slightly trembling.

He tilted my head toward him. "Look at me. I know how you feel. You remind me every single time I see you. I've told you time and time again that I'm no threat. Less than an hour ago, I was dying in the sun, and now, here I am, walking. You're a miracle worker. So, yeah, I'm buying you a Coke next week. It's a small price to pay for my health."

"I'm being serious here."

"So am I.
Cariño
, you're a miracle worker. Lay your hands on my legs, and I might just start dancing right here." While biting his lower lip, he started moving his upper body and circling his hands in the most ridiculous attempt to dance. "In fact, I think you can make some money on the side. We can pitch a tent right here on Lincoln Road. All the weirdos will come and want you to touch them. It's a sure thing."

His eyes sparkled, and his playfulness disarmed me.

"You're such a dork." I laughed, shaking my head.

And just like that, old patterns reemerged. He was harmless. I knew I could handle this.

I raced back. I didn't want to tell a bold-faced lie to my friends. It wasn't who I was. I wasn't doing anything wrong. At one point, as I entered a light jog, I thought about how ironic it would be if I pulled a muscle from rushing back. I shook it off, but I knew if that happened, I would deserve it. I had about five minutes to get to Van Dyke's.

Macy was the most punctual person I knew. She had a magical internal clock. She had probably parked her car by now. Right now, I'd bet that she was checking her makeup in the rearview mirror, fluffing her hair, and smiling at herself.

As I crossed the street, I could see Van Dyke's. I saw that Françoise was working the outside table service. When he saw me, he waved. I felt hopeful that everything would be just fine.

I arrived, panting, as I tried to catch my breath. Françoise directed me to our usual table, and my diet soda was waiting for me. He was an incredible server—a godsend, angel, fairy godfather, and elf wrapped in one. He was definitely getting a huge tip.