I’m not sure how long I just sat there like that, but when I finally looked up at Maya she handed me a tissue and offered a smile. She made a swiping motion under her eyes, letting me know I had some cleaning up to do. I stood up so I could evaluate the damage. Facing the mirror, I saw I had some serious stray mascara going on. I quickly wiped it out of the way and tossed the tissue in the trash.
Without saying anything, Maya reached inside her purse and grabbed some makeup. She touched up my mascara, eyeliner, and lip gloss and somehow made me look like I hadn’t been crying.
After a moment more of silence, Maya took my hand, “Want to get out of here? This party kinda blows.” At that, I cracked a smile and we both burst out laughing. It wasn’t that funny, but for some reason we couldn’t stop.
Once we collected ourselves, I took another deep breath. “Yeah. Let’s get out of here. First, I want to apologize to Evan and then this ‘piece of ass’ is outta here!”
“Hells yeah!” Maya joined in, giving me a high-five!
Chapter Sixteen
Escaping from the bathroom, I made a beeline to the kitchen. My goal was to find Evan, apologize for biting his head off when he was only trying to help, and then get the heck out of here. Instead of finding Evan in the kitchen, I found Gabe, taking shots. Not wanting to deal with any more of his crap tonight, I turned to head right back out before he saw me.
Too late.
“Look who decided to come up for air after getting some,” he baited.
I knew he’d had too much to drink and that it was useless to argue with someone in this state. For crying out loud, now he was taking shots! But after what he pulled tonight, I was too mad to care.
“What is your problem, Gabe?” I snipped.
He sauntered over to me and looped an arm around my waist. “I’m not used to you being quite this feisty, Emma. Is it just for me, or is it Jake that brings it out in you?” He smacked my butt earning whistles from those around us.
“Cut it out, Gabe. You’re drunk.” Maya said sternly – not hiding her annoyance. Her comment distracted Gabe enough to let me pull out of his grasp.
“Pipe down, Maya. Can’t you see my FRIEND and I are trying to have a conversation?”
Maya looked disgusted. “You really are being an ass tonight, Gabe. Emma, will you be OK for like two seconds? I’m going to go find Evan so we can get out of this nightmare.” I motioned that I would be fine, and then Maya disappeared into the crowd.
Turning my attention back to Gabe, I took a step backward and then crossed my arms over my chest. “What exactly is the issue here, Gabe? Are you really this upset that I didn’t want to date you? Is that what has you acting like such a jerk?”
“Ouch. Low blow, Emmie. And after I did you a favor tonight. Cause isn’t that what friends do? Help each other out?” he smirked.
“My God! What are you even talking about, Gabe?” I shouted.
“I thought it was about time you found out about the kind of guy you were really dating. Too bad you decided to give it up to him before you discovered all the skeletons in his closet.” My jaw dropped as tears threatened my eyes for the second time tonight. He had just announced to the entire room that I lost my virginity to Jake.
I shook my head in disbelief. Out of all the times Gabe has had too much to drink, I have never seen him act like this. In that moment, I decided that I wasn’t going to stand there and try to reason with this version of my friend. If that’s even what we were anymore.
I dropped my hands to my sides, signaling my surrender. “Maya is right. You really are being an ass tonight,” I let out, unable to hide the hurt in my voice. I turned to go find Maya. I no longer cared about finding Evan. I could apologize to him tomorrow.
“I’m sorry, Em,” Gabe said, stopping me in my tracks. Thank God, I finally got through to him. I turned around to find him standing right behind me. He placed his hands on my shoulders as the smirk returned to his face. “I’m sorry I didn’t do this sooner.” In an instant, Gabe had one hand around my neck and the other gripping the small of my back, pulling me in and firmly planting a kiss on my lips. I struggled to get away, but it was pointless. “I have always used way too much self-control with you – not wanting to ruin what we had. But hot damn if it’s not a turn on to hear that pretty little mouth say such naughty words. Tsk, Tsk, Emma.”
All of a sudden, a fist went right by my face and hit Gabe square in the jaw, causing him to release his grip on me.
“You’re lucky it’s me that found you, you dipshit,” Evan barked. “Do you have any idea what Jake would have done to you if he had seen you attacking Emma?”
Gabe rubbed his jaw. “And I’m the dipshit? I wasn’t attacking Emma. It’s called a kiss. Maybe if you ever got some, you would understand the difference.”
Evan shoved Gabe into the wall. “You arrogant asshole. Jealousy is a bad look for you Gabe. In case you haven’t noticed, Emma kicked your ass to the curb.”
Gabe looked from Evan to me before straightening himself up. “You know what, I don’t need this tonight. Emma, gimme a call the next time you need a real man to crawl through your window. It shouldn’t take you long since his friend here doesn’t even know what a simple kiss is.”
Gabe turned to leave, heading for the door. The little voice in my head was screaming at me to let him leave – to go find Jake and figure out exactly why Gabe was lucky that he didn’t find him just now. But Gabe had crossed a line tonight. First, with the verbal assault and then with whatever that just was. Without even thinking, as soon as he was out the door, I took off after him.
“Emma. Wait,” Evan called out.
I stopped and faced Evan. “No. After tonight, I deserve some answers. Starting with Gabe.”
“Ah, shit. I need to find Jake,” I heard him say to himself as I walked toward the front door.
I spotted Gabe halfway across the lawn and took off in a dead sprint in his direction. “Gabe!”
“Go away, Emma.”
“Gabe, stop!”
“Go. Away. Emma!” He yelled.
“Gabe, stop! Stop acting like such a dick.” Gabe halted and turned to face me, momentarily looking like my Gabe again, the Gabe I knew before everything got so messed up.
The moment was fleeting because as quickly as he had stopped, he turned back around and kept going, picking up his pace. Although, it had been just long enough for me to catch up to him.
“What do you want, Emma? Can’t you see that I’m trying to leave?”
“What do I want? I hardly think that is a fair question after how you’ve acted all night.” I panted, placing my hands on my hips.
“It’s all about you, isn’t it?” he shouted as he unlocked his car.
Realizing he had no intention of stopping to talk to me, I ran around to the passenger side of his car. Once I had opened the door, I heard my name being called, and I stopped to look back. Jake was sprinting toward me with Evan and Maya not too far behind.
“Emma! Baby, please don’t get in that car!” Jake screamed as he ran.
I couldn’t stop now. I missed my friend, I was tired of his crap tonight, and I wanted answers. He was going to explain what his problem was if I had to force it out of him.
Hearing the engine roar, I looked down. “Make up your mind, sweetheart. Are you in or out? I really don’t give a shit either way, but I’m going to need you to shut the door so I can leave.” Clenching my teeth together, I scowled at him as I hopped in and shut the door.
As soon as the door was shut, Gabe peeled out onto the street. I glanced in the mirror to see Jake bend over and brace himself on his legs before turning my attention back to Gabe. “You know, I’m sorry everything didn’t work out exactly how you wanted. I’m sorry that you decided you liked me more than a friend and ruined everything! Gabe, what else can I say? I’m just sorry!”
“Are you sorry you fell in love with him? Are you sorry you broke my heart into a million fucking pieces?” he shouted.
“Gabe, stop acting like this! Stop making it seem like I intentionally set out to hurt you. You were one of my best friends, and I hate that you’re not a part of my life anymore. Did you know Maya made a schedule to keep me busy all break…just so I couldn’t sit around and mope about how much I missed you? I can’t apologize for loving Jake. I can’t and I won’t, but why can’t you see that you are important to me too?”
Gabe sped up and gripped the steering wheel so tight his knuckles turned white.
“Do you not see how messed up this is? You just said Maya had to make a schedule so you didn’t sit around missing me. Me, Emma! Not him. Why can’t you just admit that you love me too, damn it!
I threw my head back into my seat. “I told you. I do love you, Gabe. I love you as a friend, just like I love Maya. You two feel more like family to me than friends. Why can’t that be enough?”
He hit the accelerator as we turned, knocking me against the door. “I told you, Emma. I can’t be your friend. I can’t sit around and watch you love him. I can’t pretend to be OK with just being your friend anymore!”
He continued to accelerate, gaining even more speed, and for the first time I realized how bad of an idea it was to let either of us get into his car with how much he had to drink.
“Gabe, what are you doing? Slow down!” I reached for the seat belt and tried to pull it across my lap, but it got stuck.
“You don’t get to make the rules anymore, Em. It’s not always about you. Other people have feelings too. I’m taking your ass home, and then you’re staying the hell out of my life. Got it?” he shouted.
“Gabe. OK. Whatever you say. Just please slow down!” The seat belt finally went loose and I began to pull it across my body.
“Emma.” The pain in his voice, as he said my name, caused me to reflexively look up at him. He was looking right at me with the saddest expression. I couldn’t stop myself from reaching over and placing my hand on his cheek.
He nuzzled his head in my hand. “I wish I could just stop loving you,” he choked out.
How is it that he could make my heart feel like it was breaking all over again? “Gabe.” I let out in a small voice. I turned to face out the window, unable to look him in the eyes any longer. Instantly, my eyes went wide.
Oh my God!
“Gabe!” I shouted as I braced myself for the impact of the crash.
Chapter Seventeen
“Emma! You can’t catch me! Try and catch me!” my sister giggled.
I smiled as I watched the two long, blonde pigtails blowing in the wind as McKenzie ran around in the sand in front of the beach house my family had rented that summer. I pretended to jog after her, knowing I would catch her in just a few strides. She may not be that much younger than me, but momma said I had hit a growth spurt and I currently have several inches on her.
“You better run fast, Kenz! I’m right behind you! When I catch you, I get a chance with the rainbow wand!” I teased, causing my sister to erupt in to even more giggles.
Not long after, I caught up to her. Without breaking my stride, I hoisted her up in the air and twirled her around as she squealed in delight. I sat her down, and those big, green eyes were beaming as they looked up at me.
“Again! Again!” she shouted. “But this time give me a head start!”
“OK. One more time, but then I really do want a turn with the rainbow wand.”
“I guess you can have a turn now,” she said sadly, holding out the wand for me to take.
I smiled at how unselfishly my sister was going to surrender our new beach toy, and for some reason, I just couldn’t make myself take it yet. “Nah, you take it for one more spin.”
Her green eyes lit up. “Really?”
“Yep. One more good run and then I’ll take a turn.”
“Thanks, Emma! I’m so happy you’re my big sister,” she smiled. “I love you, Emma.”
“Love you too, Kenz.”
“I love you, Emma. I love you, Emma.”
Wait. Something’s wrong. What’s happening? Suddenly, the sky went dark, and I couldn’t see McKenzie anymore.
“I love you, Emma.”
“I love you too, Kenz! Where are you? Keep talking!” I shouted, panicking that I couldn’t see anything.
“I love you, Emma.”
“Kenzie!” I cried.
“I love you, Emma. Come back to me!”
All of a sudden, I was in our backyard at home.
“I love you, Emma. Please come back to me!”
“I’m trying, Kenz, but I can’t find you, sweetie. Keep talking so sissy can find you.” My chest tightened and my entire body filled with pain.
“Please, baby, please come back to me.”
Wait. That voice, it doesn’t belong to McKenzie. I was in full-blown panic mode. Pain surged through me as I twirled around searching our yard for the owner of the voice.
“I love you, Em. Don’t you dare leave me.”
“Jake?” The voice. I recognized it. It was Jake’s, but where is he? Why can’t I see him?
“Come on, Blondie. Come back to me,” he pleaded.
“Jake! Jake!” I screamed. “I’m right here! I’m over here!” A pounding in my head started, and I thought my legs might give out as the pain throughout my body worsened.
“Please, Emma. I need you. I need you to wake up.”
“Jake?” I croaked, as I fought my eyelids open.
“Emma! You’re awake!” I registered his voice as a wave of pain surged through me. “You’re awake,” he said slowly, as my eyelids fully opened.
“Jake?”
“I’m right here, Em. I’m right here.”
Once my eyes were fully open, they scanned across the room and I realized I was lying in a hospital bed. “Jake, what happened?”
“What’s the last thing you remember, Em?” he asked carefully.
“Um. I um. I was getting in a car. I was getting in Gabe’s car. Oh my God! Where’s Gabe?”
Jake’s jaw tightened, and I could tell he was trying to stay calm. “Relax, Em. Gabe is fine.”
“Then why do you look so upset?”
“Emma, baby. Let me go get your parents. They went to grab a coffee.”
“Jake. Tell me what happened.”
Jake’s hand tightened around mine, causing me to realize for the first time that he had been holding my hand this whole time.
“Jake?”
“You were in a car accident, Emma. You weren’t wearing a seat belt and you hit your head really hard.”
I reached up with my other hand.
“Drop your hand, Em. You have a lot of stiches.”
I sighed as I dropped my hand back to my side. “Well, that explains the splitting pain in my head, I guess.”
Jake let out a small laugh, “Yeah, I guess it does.”
“Gabe was driving, wasn’t he?”
Jake tensed up again at the mention of Gabe. “Yes. He was,” he swallowed.
“Well if I’m here, where is he?” I pressed.
“Not here,” he said flatly.
“Jake. What are you not telling me?” Concern grew as the memories from that night flooded in.
“Emma, he should have never let you get in that car. He was in no shape to drive even himself.”
“Jake?” I questioned slowly.
He took a deep breath. “Emma, when you got in his car, I panicked. I knew he had been drinking. Then, when Maya told me he had been taking shots, I almost lost my mind with worry. I told Maya she had to drive since she was the only one that hadn’t had anything to drink, and Evan and I hopped in her car. When we found you, y’all had already crashed.” Jake looked away, but I could still see the tears building in his eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Jake,” I don’t know what possessed me to get in that car. I knew he had been drinking, but for some reason that red flag just didn’t go off like it should have.
Jake looked back down at me, and a tear fell down his cheek. “When we got here, they wouldn’t let me see you. They said that you were lucky to be alive, and that they were stitching you up and making sure everything else was OK. The doctor eventually came out and told us that you were stable, but they still wouldn’t let me see you because I wasn’t family.”
“But you’re here now. How?”
He smiled. “Your parents took one look at me and – when they saw the state I was in – insisted that they let me back to see you. I just can’t tell you how happy I am that you’re awake.” He bent down and placed a kiss on my hand. “Baby, I’ll be right back. I have to go get your parents. They have been worried sick.” He stood up, gently placed a kiss on the side of my head, and walked over to the door.
“You still haven’t told me what happened to Gabe.” I let out, causing him to briefly pause before continuing out the door and shutting it behind him.
All of the worry over the possibilities of what could have happened to my friend was pushed aside as my parents walked in with my sister directly behind them. Each one looking like they have been up all night.
My mom rushed to my side as soon as she saw that my eyes were open. “Emma, I am – we are – so happy that you are awake. We have all been so worried,” she soothed. “Can I get you anything? Do you need anything? Are you in pain?”
I forced a smile. “I’m OK, mom. I mean – I’m as good as I can be.”
“Of course you are, honey. Just let us know if anything changes, and we will have a nurse in here right away. OK?” she smiled sweetly.
“OK. Thanks, mom.”
I looked over at my dad, who still hadn’t said anything, and almost broke out in tears because of the concerned expression on his face. “Hey, dad.”
“Hey, my beautiful little girl,” he choked out as he walked closer to the side of my bed and took one of my hands.
His reference to me being his little girl made me let out a small laugh. “Dad, I’m not so little anymore and I haven’t looked in a mirror yet, but I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that I don’t look beautiful in my current state.”
He gave me a warm smile. “You couldn’t not look beautiful if you tried, and you will always be my little girl.”
“Oldest little girl,” McKenzie added with forced sarcasm, trying not to sound as worried as she so clearly was.
I couldn’t help but smile at my sister’s attempt to put on a brave front. “Hey, Kenz. You’ve been uncharacteristically quiet over there,” I teased, which earned me a genuine smile from her.
“Yeah, well, I didn’t want to interrupt the Emma Show,” she attempted to joke, which made me laugh harder than I expected, causing me to wince as I was reminded of the pain.
“Sorry, Em,” she said, the grief returning to her face.
“Kenz, get over here. I’m fine.”
“Clearly,” she said in disbelief as she made her way to my side.
“Seriously, I’m OK. I’m not dead.” As soon as the words came out, all the worry about Gabe came flooding back into my brain. Along with the question of, why hasn’t anyone told me about him yet?
“But, Em, you could have been,” my sister’s voice broke, causing my mom to retreat into my dad’s arms. “Don’t ever scare me like that again, OK? I still need my big sister,” she whispered.
I reached over and took her hand as my eyes filled with tears at her words. “Kenz, I’m not going anywhere. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me. OK?”
She forced a smile as she nodded her head to agree with me, while wiping a tear from her eyes.
After giving everyone a second to collect themselves, I took a deep breath and then addressed the one piece of information no one had volunteered. “Where is Gabe?” I asked to no one in particular. For a brief moment, you could have heard a pin drop in the room.
“He’s fine, honey. He was released last night with a cast on his arm and a few bumps and bruises,” my mom finally spoke up with a tight-lipped smile, causing me to immediately release the breath that I didn’t even realize I was holding.
“Yeah, and a broken face,” McKenzie let out under her breath.
“Wait? What?” I looked at my sister.
“You should have seen it, Em,” she said as her eyes went wide. “It took both Evan and Dylan to pull Jake off of him. It was crazy! Jake took one look at Gabe when he walked out into the waiting room and then all of a sudden Gabe was on the floor and Jake…”
“McKenzie,” my mom cut in sharply. “That’s enough.”
This was a lot of information to try to process all at once. “So if Gabe’s OK, why has everyone avoided just telling me what happened instead of letting me assume the worst?”
“He’s just not everyone’s favorite person right now, sweetie. He should have never let you get in his car – much less allowed himself to get behind the wheel,” my mom said as kindly as she could manage.
“No, he shouldn’t have,” my dad added, not bothering to hide the anger in his voice. “I’m just glad Jake got ahold of him before I had the chance to…”
“William!” my mother cut in again.
There was a knock on the door followed quickly by Jake poking his head back in.
“I wanted to give you guys a moment, but is it alright if I come back in?” He was clearly asking just to be polite because by the time he was finished with his question, he was already sitting in the chair by my bed and taking one of my hands in both of his.
“Jake, you know it would have been alright if you needed to go home and get some rest or at least take a shower,” my mom said, wearing the most genuine smile she had since she first saw that I was awake. She let out a warm laugh before continuing, “Come on you two. Let’s give these guys a minute.” She gave me a little wink before shooing my dad and sister out of the room. She stopped briefly to put her hand on Jake’s shoulder and gave it a light squeeze before exiting behind the rest of my family.
Once the door was closed, I looked back over at Jake. “You’ve been here all night?”
“Emma, I was so worried about you. There is no way I was about to leave you. They would have had to drag me out.”
“You’ve been here all night,” I repeated as a small smile broke onto my face. My eyes glossing over, again, as I let those words sink in.
Realizing I was making more of a statement than re-asking my question, Jake leaned closer to me and let one hand brush the side of my face. “There is nowhere else I’d rather be.”
I smiled while giving his hand a squeeze before thinking about how that might hurt if his hands were sore. Given what Kenz had said, I quickly released my grip. “So I guess I should ask how you’re doing, or how your hands are doing at least?”
Jake clamped his eyes shut, as soon as my words were out, and sucked in a breath. He lowered his head, and his demeanor quickly changed from happy and relieved to worried and anxious. “Before they told us you were OK, he came out in the waiting room. Just walked out, wearing only a cast on his arm. Emma, I was so upset. He is the reason you are here right now, and he walked out in only a cast.”
After a few seconds, when he still didn’t raise his head back up, I squeezed his hand three times. Glancing back up at me, his eyes were full of worry. “I’m so sorry. I was just so mad I couldn’t see straight and he…”
“Did it make you feel better?”
He cringed, “Yeah. It kind of did.”
I gave a little shrug, “OK then.”
“That’s it? I’m off the hook?”
A small laugh escaped my lips. “Yeah. I guess so, and from what I hear he’s lucky it was you and not my father. Plus, and this might make me a terrible person, but I sort of feel like he deserved it. Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad that he’s OK. It’s just, after everything that’s happened…I guess what I’m trying to say is, I understand why you did it.”