The Field (5 page)

Mick:
Well, that's the way it is. There's a boycott all right and there could be trouble … serious trouble.

William:
What sort of boycott?

Mick:
I wouldn't want to lead you astray but for the past five years now a farmer whose land is right next to the field has rented the grazing. He believes he has first claim …

William:
It's a public auction, isn't it?

Mick:
Yes … yes … but I thought I'd warn you. The village would hold it against you.

William:
I wouldn't be selling blocks to the village.

Mick:
You wouldn't get men to work for you.

William:
A few of my men in England would give their right hands to get back to Ireland.

Mick:
You don't know about land. You're a stranger … you wouldn't understand. There will be trouble.

William:
All I know is that my wife isn't well. If I don't get her back here quick, she'll crack up. Now, if that isn't trouble, tell me, what is?

Mick:
Look! I'll tell you what … you go back to your wife and I'll find a suitable field for you. I won't let you down. I'll search high and low. You won't have long to wait.

William:
You're an auctioneer?

Mick:
Yes.

William:
And this is a public auction?

Mick:
Yes.

William:
Well, I'm a prospective buyer, so how about getting along with the auction?

[Enter Maimie with a tea-tray. She comes between them]

Maimie:
[To William]
Would you like a cup of tea?

[Mick glowers at Maimie as she places tea on table]

William:
Thanks, I would.

Mick:
D'you know what he's doin'?

Maimie:
No … what?

Mick:
He's biddin' for the field!

Maimie:
What's so awful about that?

Mick:
[Furious]
Cripes Almighty, woman!

[Maimie exits with the tea-tray]

William:
I'm not so welcome, am I?

Mick:
Look, I've nothing against you personally.

William:
And I've nothing against you, personally or otherwise.

[Enter Maggie Butler]

Mick:
Ah, there you are, Mrs Butler. You're welcome!

Maggie:
Is it time for the auction yet?

Mick:
Any minute now. We're waiting for the bidders.

Maggie:
There don't seem to be many here.

Mick:
It won't be so. It won't be so, I assure you.

[Enter Maimie]

William:
[To Maggie]
Are you the owner of the field?

Maggie:
I am, sir.

William:
I'm pleased to meet you. My name is Dee … William Dee. I expect to be bidding for your property …

Mick:
[Confidentially to Maggie]
It might be better if you weren't here until the auction starts. Why don't you go upstairs with Maimie for a cup of tea?

Maimie:
Aye, Maggie, do.

Maggie:
Very well.
[She rises and Maimie solicitously takes charge of her]
You'll do your best for me, Mr Flanagan?

Mick:
We'll do our best, our very best.

Maggie:
You'll be sure to call me, Mr Flanagan.

Mick:
To be sure, to be sure.

Maimie:
Come on this way, Maggie, watch the toys.

[Exit Maggie and Maimie]

William:
As a prospective buyer, I have a right to know everything about the field.

Mick:
You know too bloody much!

William:
I know how to look after myself.

[Enter the Bird. He sidles to counter and rests his elbows on it, watching Mick and William. He is followed almost immediately by the Bull McCabe who carries an ashplant. Following the Bull, comes his son, Tadhg. They both glare at William who is somewhat surprised by their attitude]

Bull:
[Stops inside door to survey William]
Give us three half pints o' porter.

William:
Hello there.

[Mick goes behind counter to fetch the stout. The Bull scowls at William who is somewhat amused by his antics]

Bull:
We were told about you. Are you aware there's an objection here?

William:
So I'm told.

Bull:
What do you want the field for?

William:
That's no business of yours.

Mick:
He's going to make concrete blocks.

Bull:
What?

Mick:
To cover the field with concrete.

Bull:
What about the grass? What about my lovely heifers?

Tadhg:
No more meadows nor hay?
[To William]
You're an oily son-of-a-bitch!

Bull:
No foreign cock with hair-oil and a tie-pin is goin' to do me out of my rights. I've had that field for five years. It's my only passage to water. You're tacklin' a crowd now that could do for you, man. Watch out for yourself.

[Mick arrives with three bottles of stout]

Bull:
Give us sixpence worth of biscuits – far-to-go ones.

William:
[To Mick]
Isn't it time the auction was started?

Bull:
If you know what's good for you, you won't bid.

William:
Is that a threat?

Tadhg:
[Intimidating]
Make what you like of it!

William:
If you care to make yourself clear, I certainly will.

Tadhg:
[Fighting pose]
If you fancy yourself, you can have it here.

William:
For God's sake, be your age!

[William rises, goes to stairway and calls for Maggie Butler before anyone can stop him]

William:
[To others]
I think you'll all agree that Mrs Butler should be present. She
is
the rightful owner, I believe.

Mick:
Mrs Butler, I'm going to start the auction now.

[Mick places bag of biscuits on table and accepts money from Bull]

Bull:
[To Mick]
He'll get his head split if he isn't careful. Bloody imported whoresmaster, taking over the village as if he owned it.

Mick:
I want no trouble here now, Bull. There's a way for circumventing everything.

Bull:
I'll circumvent him, if there's circumventing to be done.

[Enter Maggie Butler followed by Maimie]

Mick:
Mrs Butler, take a seat.

[Reluctantly Mick goes behind counter and emerges with two long slips of white paper]

Mick:
I'll read the conditions of sale.
[Stands on a low box] ‘
The highest bidder shall be the purchaser and if any dispute arises as to any bidding, the property shall be put up again at the last undisputed bidding. There will be a reserve price and the vendor and her agents will be at liberty to bid. No person shall advance less than five pounds at any bidding and no bidding shall be retracted …'

Bull:
I see the dirty hand of the law in this!

Mick:
[Reading]
‘Two … The purchaser shall immediately on being declared as such, pay to the Auctioneer one-fourth of the purchase money as a deposit together with the usual auction fees of five per cent …' And so on and so forth, et cetera, et cetera.

[Mick hands form to Maimie who places it on counter. Bull snatches the paper]

Bull:
Law! Law!
[To Tadhg]
That's the dear material. All the money in Carraigthomond wouldn't pay for a suit length of that cloth.

[He slams form back on counter]

Mick:
And now the ‘Particulars and Conditions of Sale' …
[Reads from second paper]
‘Particulars and Conditions of Sale by Auction of the undermentioned property pursuant to advertisement duly published for the purpose …'

Bull:
Oh, merciful God, that's the rigmarole. Start the bidding and get it over.

Mick:
[Hands paper to Maimie]
… Now, this land, as you all know, is well watered and well fenced with a carrying power of seven cattle …

Bull:
Thanks to me and Tadhg. 'Twas our sweat that fenced it and our dung that manured it. Come on, man, get on with the bidding!

Mick:
Do I hear an opening bid for this excellent property?

[Bull, Tadhg and the Bird sip their stout and nothing is to be heard unless it is the sound of Tadhg crunching biscuits]

Mick:
I repeat, ladies and gentlemen, will someone bid me for this fine field on the banks of the Oinseach river.
[Pause]
This property of three acres one rood and thirty-two perches or thereabouts. This green grassy pasture …
[Pause]
… come on now! … Do I hear an opening bid? … Will someone bid me, please!

[Bull nods at the Bird and the Bird shuffles a pace forward]

Mick:
Do I hear a bid?

Bird:
£100.

Mick:
I hear you loud and clear, sir. £100 it is from the Bird O'Donnell … Now, this is more like it. Do I hear any advance on £100?

[All eyes are turned on William who calmly lights a cigarette]

Bull:
£110.

Mick:
£110 from Mr Thady McCabe.

Bird:
£120.

Mick:
£120 from Mr Bird O'Donnell.

Bull:
£130.

Mick:
Do I hear … Do I hear an increase on £130? Do I hear an increase on £130?

Bird:
£150.

Mick:
£150. Do I hear –?

Bull:
£160.

Mick:
£160 from the Bull McCabe. Do I hear any advance on £160?

[At this stage they all look at William who smokes on unperturbed]

Bird:
£190.

Mick:
Any advance on £190? Any advance on £190?

Bull:
£200!

[Pause]

Mick:
I have £200. Do I have any advance on £200? On £200? I have £200 from Mr Thady McCabe of Inchabawn …
[Again William is the subject of all eyes]
Is this to be the final bid? There is a reserve and I will negotiate by private treaty with the highest bidder. C'mon now, ladies and gentlemen. Before I close this public auction, do I hear any advance on £200?

William:
[Casually]
Guineas!

Mick:
Any advance on £200?

William:
Two hundred guineas.

Tadhg:
What's guineas?

Bull:
He should be disqualified. There's no such thing as a guinea going these days.

William:
All right. I'll bid £300.

[An audible hush]

Mick:
[Nervously]
I have £300 … have I any advance on £300? I'm bid £300. Do I hear £350? Do I hear £350? No! … In that event, I'll call a recess for a day and negotiate by private treaty.

[Mick is about to turn away but William rises and stops him]

William:
What time to you propose to start tomorrow?

Mick:
Oh, some time in the morning. We can't all be on the dot like you. These people here are hardworking people with little time to spare.

William:
What guarantee have I that you won't close the deal with him?
[Indicating Bull]

Mick:
Now, let that be the least of your worries. Everything is nice and legal here.

William:
I take it then that my bid being the highest, you'll give me something in writing until morning.

Mick:
[Anger]
You'll get no bloody writing from me … You'll be here in the morning if you want to bid again.

William:
Bid against whom?

Mick:
[For the benefit of Maggie Butler]
You'll bid till this woman's reserve has been reached. There's no one going to wrong an old woman, not while I'm on my feet, Mister. I'll give you a guarantee of that.

William:
How much is the reserve?

Mick:
£800.

William:
That's not beyond me and I'm prepared to bid again. When can I see the field?

[Tadhg and Bull step forward]

Tadhg:
Stay away from that field.

Bull:
There's cattle of ours there.

William:
If the field is for auction, I'm entitled to have a look at it.

Bull:
Use your head while you're able. Stay away!

Tadhg:
That's right! Get the hell out of here now … while you can.

Maggie:
You can see my field any time, sir.

Bull:
[Roars]
Shut up, you oul' fool! What about my claim?

Maggie:
You've no claim!

Bull:
[Dangerously]
Look out for yourself, you! Look out for yourself.
[He cows the old woman]