The Game Changer: A Novel (29 page)

Fuck, what if someone saw that?

I quickly scanned the area, noting the absence of prying eyes and cameras. I couldn’t be certain there wasn’t someone hiding, but it looked all clear.

Thank the stars.

“Oh God, Cassie. I’m so sorry.” His eyes widened as a look of horror crossed his face. “It broke my fucking heart to see you crying. You’re too beautiful to cry like that. I just wanted to take your tears away and make you happy.”

I processed his words.

I think.

What is he saying exactly?

I refused to move for what seemed like an eternity, but I’m sure it was only a few seconds. “Um,” I stuttered, “I… I have to go.”

I reached into the open trunk of the car, pulling at my suitcase. “Cassie. Look at me,” Matteo said forcefully. I released my grip on my suitcase, turning to face him. “Please don’t tell Jack. I’m so sorry. I never should have done that.”

“Then why did you?” I yelled as embarrassment and anger all competed for the gold medal in my emotional Olympics.

His long, tanned fingers gripped the edge of his jacket. “Oh, come on. Don’t make me say it out loud.”

“Say what out loud? What the hell are you taking about?” I didn’t have time for this. Not tonight. I was already coming apart at the seams; I couldn’t take any more shit from anyone.

Here, Matteo, pull this frayed piece of fabric and watch me fall into particles of skin, clothing, and hair in a big heap on the ground.

“I like you. I didn’t mean to and I know we can never be together, but fuck!” He started pacing.

“What do you mean, you like me?” I shouted at his back. “You don’t fucking like me. We’re friends. That’s all we’ve ever been. That’s all we’ll ever be,” I insisted.

His jaw worked under his fingertips as he continued to pace. “I know. Like I said, I fucked up. I didn’t mean to go and fall in love with you—”

I interrupted, refusing to hear another word. “You are not in love with me! Do you hear me?” I inched closer to his body, my anger rising. “Say it!”

He stopped pacing and shook his head. “Say what?”

“Say you’re not in love with me! You just think you are because we spend so much time together, and you’re supposed to protect me. But you’re not in love with me. Not really. So I want you to fucking say it.” I jabbed my finger into his rock-hard chest repeatedly.

He shrugged his shoulders, no words leaving his lips. I jabbed at him again. “Say it!” And then I lost it. I started crying out of pure frustration. “Say it, damn it!” I insisted, stomping my foot on the concrete.

He took a step toward me, and I firmly placed my hand against his stomach, stopping him cold. “Do you feel something for me? Anything at all?” his voice pleaded.

I wanted to kick him in the nuts right then and there and tell him that pure hatred raced through my veins for him. And well, that was
something
. But it would have been a lie. “Matteo, I do not feel anything for you other than friendship. I love Jack. I’ve always loved Jack.”

“So you’re not attracted to me? This is purely a one-way street?” His lips formed a snarl, and I fought down the urge to sock him in the jaw. He’d pushed all the wrong buttons tonight.

“I’d have to be dead to not be attracted to you!”

“I knew it!” he shouted, pleased at my apparent revelation.

“But it’s not the kind of attraction that means anything!” I yelled back, my frustration boiling over so hot and thick I thought my skin might blister.

He shoved a hand through his hair in frustration before leaning toward me. “What the fuck does that even mean?”

“It just means that yes, I think you’re hot. But so does anyone with eyes! You’re a good-looking guy. Of course I’m attracted to you,” I explained, intentionally lowering my voice before continuing. “But I don’t want to be with you. I don’t want to leave Jack for you. It’s not the kind of attraction that makes me question anything in my life, if that’s what you’re asking.”

His gaze dropped to the ground, looking like all the wind had just been sucked from his sails. “Oh.”

Guilt seeped into my bones, making itself at home. Scenes of our time spent together ran through my mind like a sports highlights reel. Had I given him the wrong impression? Did I lead him on? Did I make Matteo think there was something between us?

“Look, I’m sorry if I’ve ever given you some impression that I wanted more from you. I don’t. And I don’t say that to hurt you, but I’m in love with Jack. I want that to be very clear.”

“You didn’t.” He paused, exhaling a breath so large his chest caved inward. “You didn’t lead me on. It’s just that I don’t really spend any time with anyone other than you.”

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. You don’t love me, Matteo. I promise you that you don’t. You just think you do because we’re
always together. Maybe we should look into hiring another driver when I get back into town?”

The idea of a new driver filled me with a sliver of relief. The lines of our relationship had blurred so often that I suddenly appeared blinded by it. Matteo worked for us, but the friendship we formed often took precedence. Lines needed to be clear again—business first, friendship second. But how would I ever explain that to Jack without him suspecting something?

His face twisted as he pushed off the curb, standing above me. “Please don’t fire me. I love working for you guys. This is literally the best job I’ve ever had. Give me another chance. Please, Cassie. I’m so sorry. It will never happen again. I promise.”

I couldn’t give him any answers, so I didn’t. Right now, I needed to get the hell out of New York and away from everyone. “I have to go.”

“Are you going to tell Jack?” His handsome face looked nervous; it seemed strange to see him looking so undone.

“I don’t know,” I admitted. I considered keeping the kiss from Jack, and that fact alone nearly wrecked me. Omitting the truth was still being dishonest. I’d be doing the number one thing I’d insisted Jack never to do me: lie.

“He’ll kill me.” Matteo rubbed his temples.

“Yeah.” I couldn’t disagree. “He will.”

Jack

W
atching Cassie run out our door last night practically tore me in two. I knew I had to let her go, but it fucking killed me to stand there and watch it happen. I hoped Melissa would be able to talk some sense into her. Despite all of the torment and pain I’d caused in the past, I knew Melissa still believed that Cassie and I were meant to be together. I thought I could count on that much.

I convinced myself that Cassie just needed some time away. She’d see everything clearly in a few days, and she’d come back home to me. I knew that being in the public eye could be unbearable at times, but hopefully it was worth putting up with in order to be together.

Right?

I knew what I wanted. And what I wanted was to spend the rest of my life with Cassie. I’ve always known it, but having her leave like this only solidified the fact that I refused to live my life without her in it. I wanted her to know how serious I was about us. Nothing and no one would ever come between us again. I didn’t know shit about jewelry, but every guy knew about Tiffany’s. The ring Chrystle sported on her tiny finger had been her late grandmother’s,
so all of this ring-shopping business was new to me. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I hustled down the busy New York streets toward the shop six or so blocks away. I pulled my hat down low and donned sunglasses, hoping no one would recognize me and try to stop me for pictures. Two steps from the Tiffany’s store a voice shouted, “Jack Carter?” and my feet stopped moving. “Oh my God, are you Jack Carter?”

I looked up to see a teenage girl practically dancing off the sidewalk. “Hi.” I smiled, not wanting her to draw attention to me, or the store I was about to walk into.

“Can I get a picture with you? Please?” Her voice shook.

“Sure.” I leaned toward her as she tried to take a self-portrait of us. I grabbed the phone from her shaking hands. “Here, I’ll take it.” I reached out my arm as far as it would go before clicking the button on her phone.

“Thank you so much. Oh my God. I can’t wait to show my dad. And all my friends. They think you’re so hot,” she gushed.

“Just your friends think I’m hot?” I teased, hoping to ease the teen’s nerves.

She laughed, her face turning a bright shade of red before squeaking out, “Thanks again. Bye.”

I turned around, scanning the area for photographers and passed the Tiffany’s entrance just to be safe. When no one else approached me, I turned back around and hastily walked through the revolving door. Once inside, I wanted to puke. Talk about overwhelming. Glass cases lined the entire length of the store. Where the hell was I supposed to start?

“Hello, sir. May I help you find something?” A brunette stepped in front of me with a fake smile.

“Um.” I froze. “Engagement rings.”

Her fake smile deepened. “Right this way.”

She led me past a crowd of people hovering over something and directed me toward a display of cases. “All of our engagement rings are here. Let me find a specialist to help you.”

“Thanks,” was all I muttered in response.

I glanced down. No wonder girls loved this shit. Diamonds of all sizes and colors sparkled like the lights at the baseball stadium. Everything seemed so fancy and showy—neither of which was Kitten’s style. I continued to scan the flashy rings when a voice broke my concentration.

“Good afternoon. My name is Elizabeth. Sasha told me you were looking for engagement rings. Do you have a specific style in mind?”

Yeah. The kind that fits on her hand and makes her say yes when I propose.

“Um, no. I have no idea what I’m doing.”

“How about we start with a price range. Do you have a certain amount you are looking to spend?” She smiled, her overly white teeth blinding me.

“It doesn’t matter.”

Her face lit up. Like seriously… Lit. The. Fuck. Up. Like I’d just told her she’d hit the jackpot.

“OK. So then, is there a certain shape she likes?”

“Honestly.” I paused. “Elizabeth, was it?” She nodded. “I have no idea what kind of shape she likes. I’d just like to get her a ring that fits her personality.”

“Alright then. Is there a shape you like? There’s round, cushion cut, princess.”

“I don’t know what any of that means other than round. Why don’t I just look at these, and I’ll tell you which ones I like.”

“Of course. You go right ahead.”

Holy hell, salespeople are annoying.

I wandered around the cases searching for the one ring that looked right. I passed by all the so-called “fancy” diamonds, assuming that Cassie would probably hate a big pink or yellow diamond on her finger.

I stopped at a case filled with more subtle pieces. They looked more classic, timeless even, and I liked the look. And then I noticed it. A round diamond surrounded on all sides by smaller diamonds. The band held diamonds as well.

“Elizabeth, can I see this ring please?” I looked up, searching for her.

She smiled again, rushing over. “Which one?”

“The round one right there with all the diamonds around it,” I said, pointing.

“Beautiful choice. Now this band comes with either a two-and-a-half-, three-, or four-carat diamond in the center.”

“You lost me,” I admitted.

“The size of the diamond. The center one for this band can accommodate any of the sizes I mentioned.”

I contemplated her words, but still had no idea what they meant. “Can I see the difference in sizes? I have no idea how big or small that is.”

“Of course, let’s go in the back.”

She led me toward a private office in the back, the ring I picked out coming with us in a small white paper bag. “Please sit.” she motioned to the black leather chair, and I sat down.

Elizabeth unfolded a black velvet ring holder and gently placed the diamond ring inside before unfolding another small envelope and pouring out three diamonds. She arranged them flawlessly on the velvet with her tweezers.

I sat back and admired them. “OK, I think she’d hate the four-carat one. That thing is enormous and would take up her entire hand.”

I released a long breath, wanting to choose the right ring at the right size. I pulled at my shirt to relieve the pressure that raced through me. “What size do you like best with that band?”

“Honestly I think the three carats is divine. And the band itself is gorgeous. They complement each other beautifully.”

I nodded in agreement. “I think you’re right. Let’s go with the three carats.”

“Great!” She smiled. “One more question. Do you want this particular diamond, or would you like me to look for a better one?”

“What do you think?”

“Honestly?” She placed a black contraption against her eye as she examined the diamond. “I think it’s a beautiful diamond. I don’t see any inclusions, scratches, or marks in it.”

“So it’s not a piece of crap, right?”

She laughed uncomfortably, clearly stunned by my language. “No, sir. Definitely not. We don’t carry any crap in our store.”

“Great. Then I’ll take it.”

Cassie

I
told Melissa I didn’t want to talk on the drive back from LAX. I leaned my head against her car’s passenger window and closed my eyes part of the time, and watched the palm trees fly by the rest. When I walked through the door of our old apartment, relief filtered through every weight-induced crack in my bones. The pressure I endured living in New York had become such a constant companion that I’d stopped being aware of the heaviness that bore down on me.

I looked over my shoulder at Melissa and took a long, deep breath, filling my lungs before virtually crumpling on the couch.

“Can we talk now?” she asked, tossing me a bottle of water from the fridge.

I stared at her, wanting to confess everything, but not really knowing where to start. “It’s just a relief to be away from everything and everyone. I had no idea how stressed out I was until I wasn’t there. You know?” I buried my head in my hands.