The Knight Behind the Pillar (16 page)

             
Arthur who had said and done nothing and Alain shortly returned to the darkness of tower, but then I saw another face familiar to me.  Alongside Leodegrance, who was at the base of the stairs and about to walk up to return inside, was the lady I had knocked into from the hallway and she was speaking with him.  Her hair no longer platted, just tied back and fell over a brown wrap that in turn covered the her dark blue dress. 

             
Reminded of my quest as she called it, I darted away from the edge and raced to the trap door.  To get across to her and find out who she was before I lost her would not easy given how many people filled the yard, but I would try.  I actually needed to see her!  I could feel my joy racing through my veins just because I had found her, a new feeling that surprised me.  From having only seen her in the hallway for a moment, I now urgently wanted to speak with her again and cross swords once more.  While I did not actually promise I would seek her out, it was almost a promise and I felt that not to try would be wrong.  If I was to be any kind of knight in the future, fulfilling my promises or implied promises was required. 

             
I dropped down the trap door wondering what I would say to her before suddenly all thoughts of her were vanished as a loud booming voice reached me. 

             
“You!” Shouted the voice of Aries and suddenly I realised the moment I had been dreading for the last two days had arrived. 

             
Before I even turned around to face him, a hand reached out took hold of the top of my tunic from nowhere and slammed me against the stone wall next to the ladder.  An arm then pinned me there.  The time and rest I had gained since being thrown of the horse yesterday I lost in an instant and I let out a yell of pain.  If this in anyway surprised Aries he did not let it show and instead I suspected it would give him satisfaction. 

             
“I can explain…” I managed to get out after a sharp intake of breath.   

             
Aries cut across me and yelled.  “Explain!  You’ve avoided me for days, your duties untouched and then I find you spying on a meeting of no concern of yours!”

             
His grip continued to hold me against the wall, his arm against my neck and his raging face only inches away. 

             
“I was told to stay with Arth….”  I attempted to answer.

             
“Who the hell has authority to tell you what to do other than me!  I tell you when to sit, I say when to stand or when to jump.” Aries continued yelling in my face.  “Your duty to me comes first, me, or do you now feel serving me is beneath you now you’re socialising with royalty?”

             
My next answer was in danger of getting me killed and I had to be careful.  “No, no my lord.”  I squeaked, settling for submissiveness to calm the storm. 

             
Aries relaxed his arm and I could move again, but not far enough to escape the wall.   

             
“A bit of nobility arrives here and suddenly you’re the son of a king again?” Aries continued yelling.

             
“No my lord.” I pleaded.

             
Above me the light from the open trap door was cut off as someone was about to come down, but quickly changed their mind seeing Aries’s glare and hurried along to find another way down.

             
He turned back to me.  “You are a pathetic nothing your father wanted rid of, you understand, a useless runt he got rid of.  Had I not owed your father, you think anyone else would have wanted you?” Aries onslaught continued and I gritted my teeth, willed myself to not react as I knew it was what he wanted.  “And yet you have no appreciation of the training I’ve provided you, all my food and my time wasted!”

             
With a parting push, so I would hit my head against the wall once more, he then let go and stepped away.

             
“I do my lord and, and I thank you for it.” I answered automatically dropping down to crouch with my back against the wall.

             
He saw through it.  “Oh please don’t act the servant, it’s an insult.” He snapped and paused awaiting a reply from me, but I had decided shutting up was now the best idea.  “No words for me now, eh, now there‘s no more explanation aye!  You’ve decided you don’t want my hospitably have you, no longer answer to me and think he’s going to help you out of this place eh?  Make you a knight perhaps.  And what kind of knight would that make you I wonder, of what worth?”

             
“I….” I begun, but stopped. 

             
Standing up again cautiously, but remaining against the wall I sensed that I should find some reply.  However, as Aries paced the chamber and I stood there obediently and the words deserted me.  At the back of my head I decided it was already too late to hope I would find the woman from the hallway and I was disappointed, yet the rest of me was telling me to focus on survival right now.  Aries was yelling and all I could think about was her, what to say to her, it was foolish, it was unexplained and certainly not me ordinarily.

             
“Pathetic.” Aries stated loudly as a conclusion to my lack of fight as he stopped moving and faced me again.  “Can’t see what they see in you myself, why they want you to help our new king I have no idea either.”  He splattered. 

             
“What!” I blurted out in surprise and unable to stop myself.

             
“It would appear you are indeed someone’s favourite,” Aries explained with a sarcastic voice and mocking arms out stretched, “you have been volunteered to practice your skills with our new king.  A decision made after you left the meeting yesterday.  Given the forthcoming challenges, as my lord would put it, Arthur needs to ensure he has good enough skills to defend himself.  And so you are to report to Bedivere this afternoon.”

             
Bedivere was the fort’s marshal.  He was kind of leader of the guards in a way.  He often trained others in swordsmanship and how to fight while riding.  He was also one of the keepers of the main armoury, one of the most trusted positions to hold.  I had trained with him on occasion, more often of late now I was a squire.

             
“Me?” I queried foolishly to be clear of doubt.

             
Aries smiled, but it was certainly not friendly.  “Oh don’t think your gaining any reward or anything that important boy.” He sneered as he approached me again and I increasingly feared being hit or worst.  “Bedivere is instructed to act as a personal trainer to the king and to concentrate all his time on preparing him, but Arthur is going to need a practice target.”  Face to face and too close to bear, he pushed me back with just his index finger.  “You.” He said and then he backed away again to my utmost relief.

             
“Oh, I mean yes my lord.” I quickly said. 

             
“Given how useless you’ve been the last few days I can’t think of a better place for you.  At least none of the others need waste their time entertaining our new king.” Aries commented and I knew others meant other squires.  I was also clear he was not enormously keen on Arthur by his tone.  He turned away and headed for the stairs adding threateningly.  “You start this afternoon and by the way don’t think this is the end of it.  You might wish you are killed in practice by the time I am finished.”

             
I stared at the black sweeping cloak disappear with his final words from view and took a deep breath.  In truth I needed to punch something, shout out my hate for this man and let go the tight ball of rage inside the pit of my stomach. 

             
I was not nothing! 

             
I stopped myself from actually shouting such declaration after him and just mouthed the words towards the blank stone walls of the stair. 

             
I guess if you were to consider it carefully I had been sent away almost as far as it was possible to travel from Northumberland and still stay on land.  Unless you were to go a little further south and reach Cornwall, but that was King Mark’s land and he controlled his borders so fiercely it might as well be across the sea for the difficulty it was to enter.  Wanting to be a knight was my idea.  While I had upset my father with the decision and he did send me away, at least he still provided for me to be a knight one day.  He had arranged for me to be at Caerleon, be it a favour from Lord Aries or not.  I knew I had disappointed my father and yes I knew I was nothing to him now, but have it be told to you so bluntly cut a wound and hurt as much as if it were a cut from a sharp knife.  It was none of Aries’ business and he had no right to say anything!  Then again, maybe my father had not been as helpful as I first thought.  Why chose this place, why this far and with a Lord who had so many squires?  Was I just living in hope as a squire and had no other choice, just like the others and many of them had more influential sponsors than me?  These were thoughts I had often denied, but each day it was getting harder. 

             
Maybe Aries had a good idea.  It was something I had not considered in the very short time I had known the once squire and now future king.  Perhaps I should seek to serve Arthur, but people might then think I had not been trying to be a friend and instead I was seeking to use him to my advantage and get him to make me a knight?  Would I want to use him like everyone else, and in my view this included Alain and Merlin who were playing some game of power and Arthur was the prize.  Maybe, maybe, question on question, the world started to annoy me and just maybe I did not care. 

Alain being here in Caerleon was certainly a factor influencing Aries.  My lord was not normally in such a foul mood, well he had moments and I had never known him to be cheerful.  Being held against the wall was about him wanted to vent anger and frustration and looking for an excuse to allow him the opportunity.  I was the excuse.  He might accuse me of changing somehow to impress the face of nobility arriving, but he was just as guilty.  He was Alain’s vessel and since his liege lord had arrived at Caerleon for the first time along with a number of high ranking lords his sudden change in character was clearly connected.  Abruptly he was not as in charge as he was use to being and I was thankful for it as it might be the reason
I stood still alive to think.

             
Where I stood was now an empty stone room and deduced that this reflected life.  I spent a little more time surrounding myself with self pity, or it might be regret still that I had failed to reach the nameless woman.  Finally moving, feeling renewed pain through my shoulder now, I let the world back in. 

             
It was by the second step down the stairs that realisation dawned.  I had been given free time.  This gift of time was something Aries had given me without thinking.  It was clear he did not want me anyway near him or my normal duties.  With my arranged training practice session with Arthur not until the afternoon, I was free.  My now hurried steps had headed me out of the town within minutes and I travelled northwards towards the hills.  This was a rare escape from my humble existence within the stone walls of Caerleon.  Soon the town dropped away behind me and formed part of wider world of the Usk valley and the river.  Permission to leave or not I did not care.  Partly I wished I had brought a Falcon with me, but thought it best not to alert anyone that I was unoccupied as it would have been just asking for a job.  Besides I doubted my freedom would have gone down well with other squires.

             
Instead I found an outcrop of rocks and climbed to the top, having pursued my bruises from yesterday it was a good idea and worthwhile.  I had not gone as far as the woods to the north west with its hidden old hill fort or as far up to see the valleys beyond, but I was just high enough to see most of Caerleon.   I sat on the edge and watched the world.  Here the stale damp air of the fort could not reach me, here the noises of working life faded to be replaced by sounds of the wind and the odd bird and here I could see how small everything was.

             
My thoughts still lingered around my parents and the notion of home.  Caerleon was familiar and safe, but not home.  Before that home was more about my father than the stone walls I lived within.  His personality was more dominate and stronger than any stronghold.  Yet perhaps my big adventure to become a knight a few years ago was simply to switch one stone wall for another.

             
A light breeze carried across the side of the hill and whipped my hair around at times.  It was cool, but not enough to chill just awake the senses.  I could see many carts moving along the bridge, mostly heading to the town as suddenly everyone seemed to want to be here for the new king, or more importantly to find potential custom for their wares.  The odd messenger could be spotted to, galloping through to seek an audience and reveal the latest news.

             
My father was not around when I left, busy with duties as he always was.  Mother was busy with my younger brothers to see me leave and perhaps I should have sought audience before I went.  Years have since disappeared.   In the last two days I had needed to mention or had the likes of Merlin and Aries mention my father more times than I had since leaving.   I had heard nothing from him since leaving.  Why would he be interested in me now and I was so far away.  My mother would not have dared to have written to me either despite knowing I could write.  At least I think she could write as well, but she never dared admit it.