The Life of Anna, Part 3: Embraced (22 page)

He stood and stretched, then went to look out
the window.

The sun was rising on his wedding day. The
day he would become Anna’s husband. Part of him was scared to
death. He didn’t want to cause Anna any more pain, physically or
emotionally. He wanted to be a good husband to her. But what if he
inadvertently hurt her? What if he lost his temper in front of her?
She would be terrorized.

As soon as they were married, he would put
the word out that he and his team were unavailable for a few
months. It would give him and Anna time to get used to each other.
They could settle into their new life and new house.

Alex grinned to himself. He couldn’t wait to
take Anna to the new home he’d bought her. It was a palatial
residence in the Presidio Heights neighborhood of San Francisco.
He’d found it when he was out in August and Kurt had signed the
paperwork for him when he was there in December. When Alex took her
home, he would take her straight there and carry her over the
threshold like a proper husband. They could have a wedding
reception there and celebrate with their friends.

As much as Alex loved Germany, he missed his
friends in San Francisco. It would be difficult to move home when
it became necessary. He hoped everything would be settled with Anna
before that happened. He couldn’t bear to leave her behind. But as
long as she was tied to Devin, San Francisco was her home and he
couldn’t take her away.

That was his next course of learning: to find
out how to free Anna from Devin once and for all.

Alex hummed to himself as he dressed and went
to his father’s room at the Schloss. He wanted to get home and get
ready for the wedding. He couldn’t wait to have Anna as his
wife.

*****

Anna’s eye snapped open and she grabbed her
stomach.

“Not again,” she moaned and ran into the
bathroom, just making it to the toilet before losing what little
was left in her stomach.

She rested her head on the cool porcelain of
the nearby tub while she regained her breath. A soft knock sounded
at the bedroom door.

“Come in,” she called weakly.

She heard a door open and the sound of
something being set down on a table. “
Fraulein
?”

“I’m in the bathroom.”

A girl a few years older than herself walked
in. She wore a black dress with a white apron over it. Her brown
hair was neatly tucked back into a bun and her bright smile faded
when she saw Anna on the floor.

“Oh
, Fraulein
,” she said earnestly.
“Are you all right?” She went to the sink and wet a washcloth and
pressed it to Anna’s forehead and cheeks. “Are you ill?”

Anna shrugged weakly. “I don’t know. I’ve
never been sick before. I’m feeling better now.”

The girl helped her to her feet. “Let me help
you back to your bed.”

When Anna was settled back under the covers,
the girl spoke again. “I am Brigitte. I will be attending to you
while you are here.”

“Hi, Brigitte,” Anna said softly

“I have brought you breakfast. Would you like
to try to eat?”

Anna looked over at the tray on the table and
nodded. She was hungry and it smelled good.

Brigitte brought the tray and positioned it
on legs over Anna’s lap. “Is there anything else you need?”

Anna shook her head. “No, thank you. It looks
wonderful.”

Brigitte curtsied. “I will let
der
Herzogin
know you are up and that you are not feeling well. I
will return in a few minutes.”

Anna dove into her food. As she ate, she
began to feel better and even allowed herself to get excited about
the day.

She had almost finished eating by the time
Ilsa and Brigitte returned. Ilsa immediately went to Anna and felt
her forehead. “You do not seem to have a fever,” she said in her
accented voice. She looked at her closely. “Alex said that you were
ill on the plane as well.”

Anna nodded. “But I felt better after I threw
up.”

“Are you feeling better now?”

“Yes, thank you.”

Ilsa sat down on the bed and studied her
closely. “Is there anything else going on?” she asked softly,
taking her hand.

“When is there not something going on?” Anna
gave her a wry smile.

Ilsa laughed gently. “I meant
physically.”

“Oh.” Anna smiled, embarrassed. “I’ve been
tired, but I also haven’t been sleeping well. Ever since....” Anna
swallowed and looked down at her hand.

“Ever since what,
Liebe
?”

“Since Ben died,” she whispered and started
crying.

She shouldn’t be crying. It was her wedding
day. It wasn’t that Anna didn’t want to marry Alex. She did. But
her heart ached for Ben. For his life that had been taken because
of her.

Ilsa scooted up and held Anna as she
cried.

“I’m sorry. I just...I’ve been crying so much
lately,” Anna said between sobs. “I feel like such a mess.”

“Oh, Anna. It is all right. It has only been
a few weeks since he died, correct?”

Anna nodded.

“Grief does not go away overnight. It might
never go away. But it will soften. With time.” Ilsa stroked her
hair as she spoke. “It will get easier.”

When Anna’s tears subsided, Ilsa smiled at
her. “Would you like to see the dresses I picked out for you? You
can choose any of them to wear today.”

Anna sniffed and nodded. “Wedding
dresses?”

“Not the elaborate styles that most American
brides think of; that would not be practical for a German civil
wedding. I understand you have a beautiful dress for New Year’s
Eve, though.”

Anna smiled brightly. “Oh, it’s so
beautiful.” Her face fell. “But I don’t know if Kaitlyn was able to
find one that fit. The one she picked out originally was too
small.” Anna burst into tears again. “I’ve gained weight. I don’t
fit into any of my clothes anymore.” She looked up at Ilsa. “Will
Alex be upset?”

“Anna, if you have gained weight, you were
too thin to begin with. You are very thin. Alex said he thought you
had lost weight.”

Anna stared at her. “How is that possible? I
don’t understand.”

Ilsa was thoughtful for a moment. “Sometimes
it just happens, Anna. Women’s bodies have minds of their own
sometimes.” She stood. “Let me go get the dresses and you can pick
one out. I am sure we’ll find something you like.”

*****

“Wilhelm? Are you in there?”

Wilhelm looked up at the sound of his wife’s
voice in the hall. She sounded distressed. “I’m here,
Mausi
. What’s wrong?” He stood and walked around his desk
to meet her. He had just returned home a few minutes ago.

Ilsa walked into his study and closed the
door behind her. “I think Anna might be pregnant.”

“What? That’s not possible, Ilsa.” He didn’t
want to discount his wife’s instincts. They were normally right on.
But the likelihood of Anna being pregnant was next to zero.

“She was ill this morning. She was ill
yesterday on the plane. She said she’s been emotional, tired and
not sleeping.”

“Ilsa, she’s been under a lot of stress
lately—”

“She says none of her clothes fit her
anymore, but Alex said she looked like she had gotten thinner.”

Wilhelm thought for a moment. Anna had looked
different last night. Her breasts were fuller for one thing and she
just looked...different. He’d had a lot on his mind last night and
it hadn’t completely registered. But now that Ilsa brought it
up.... But, how? There were ways for her to get pregnant, but they
tended to be mystical in nature, though there were physical things
that could be done. Perhaps she’d had a particularly intense night
with Ben. Intense emotions had been known to make it happen. She
had loved Ben, Wilhelm didn’t doubt that.

“Wilhelm?”

Ilsa’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts.
“I’m sorry, Ilsa. Yes, I suppose you could be right. I know your
instincts are usually correct.” Wilhelm sighed. “Don’t say anything
to her. If she is, I highly doubt she knows it. It would never
occur to her. I don’t want to upset her.”

“You still want her to marry Alex if she’s
pregnant with another man’s child?”

“If it was anyone else except her, I would
handle things much differently. But Anna is different. And she is
meant to be with Alex. Of this I am sure.”

Ilsa frowned. “His first child will not be
his. That’s not fair to anyone involved.”

“Ilsa, I appreciate your concern. But this
wedding must take place. Alex will handle it. He loves her.”

Ilsa sighed. “I know. But what will people
say?”

“No one has to know. She can’t be very far
along. A baby could easily be conceived today, at least in other
people’s minds.”

“Should we tell Alex?”

Wilhelm thought for a minute. “Not until
after the wedding. Let them have this happy day before life
intrudes. Waiting a few days won’t hurt anything.”

“All right. If you think that is what’s
best.” Ilsa set her mouth in a straight line.

Wilhelm could sense that she wasn’t happy
about his decision, but wouldn’t contradict him. “Ilsa, please.
It’s not Anna’s fault. She’s been told her whole life that she will
never have children. She needs our support and our love.”

Ilsa looked at him closely. “You love her,
don’t you?” she asked quietly.

Wilhelm hesitated. He loved Ilsa with all his
heart. He had since he was sixteen years old. She was the best
possible wife a man could imagine. And he never lied to her. They
were always completely honest with each other, even if it hurt. It
was what kept their marriage strong. The last thing he wanted to do
was hurt her.

“Yes, Ilsa. I do. But she will be Alex’s
wife. I would never, ever replace you for another woman.” He walked
over to her and pulled her close. “I love you, Ilsa. I have always
loved you. My desire for you is as strong as it was when we were
first married.”

Ilsa leaned her head against his chest. “I
know, Wilhelm. I suppose it’s only fair. You’ve not fallen in love
with anyone else our whole marriage. I suppose I can’t say the same
thing.”

Wilhelm had decided when he became Elder that
he would give Ilsa the decision to have a lover if she wanted one.
It wasn’t fair for him to be surrounded by young women and her to
be at home alone in a cold bed.

They had gone to school together with the son
of the French Ambassador. Maurice had fallen in love with Ilsa when
Wilhelm had, in secondary school, but Ilsa had chosen Wilhelm, and
Maurice married a woman from France. Maurice’s wife had died a few
years before Wilhelm became Elder and Ilsa had chosen him for her
lover. He knew she loved both of them. Wilhelm was thankful she’d
found a lover who cared for her as much as he did. Ilsa was loyal
and discreet. If plans changed and Wilhelm was to be home when he
was supposed to have been gone, she told Maurice that she couldn’t
see him that night.

Wilhelm had never found another woman that he
loved like he loved his wife. Yes, he participated in the
Brotherhood activities, and there were girls that he had cared
about and took care of. But he hadn’t loved any of them.

Until Anna. Anna was special. Ilsa would see
that as she spent time with her. At least he hoped so. Ilsa wasn’t
a jealous woman, and he hoped that his feelings for Anna wouldn’t
sour the potential relationship between her and Anna.

“Please, Ilsa. She needs a mother figure. She
is so lonely and lost.”

Ilsa smiled up at him. “I know. She is very
sweet. I can see why you love her. And Alex too.” She reached up to
kiss him. “I love you. I will not say anything until you decide
they should know.”

“Thank you, Mausi.” He kissed her again, then
stroked her cheek. “I love you too.

Ilsa gave him a last smile and then turned
and left the room.

Wilhelm leaned against his desk, thinking
about what Ilsa had said. If she was right, this could be a good
thing for Anna. He believed that Alex would do the right thing and
hoped he wouldn’t be disproved.

*****

Anna paced in her room while she waited for
Ilsa to return. Ilsa hadn’t looked pleased when she left. Had Anna
done something to displease her? She didn’t want to upset Alex’s
mother. She was more used to being around women now that she had
been out of the Manor for a while. Katherine had embraced her and
had kept in touch after the funeral. But sometimes, they still
intimidated her.

She was staring out the window when someone
knocked on the door before opening it. Ilsa walked in followed by
Brigitte pushing a rack of white dresses.

“Oh, my!” Anna exclaimed, looking at the
rack. There were so many of them.

“I selected a wide variety of dresses since I
did not know what style you liked.” She turned to the other girl.
“Brigitte, would you please pull them out so that she can take a
look at them.” She turned back to Anna. “You can try on as many as
you would like. We have plenty of time.”

After trying on several dresses that she
liked, and getting discouraged that some she liked didn’t fit, she
finally decided on a tea-length lace A-line dress. Brigitte put
Anna’s hair up in a loose up-do and put white flowers in her
hair.

Ilsa had gone away to get ready and returned
as Brigitte was buttoning up her dress. “You look beautiful, Anna.”
She laughed softly. “Alex is pacing downstairs like a caged lion. I
have never seen him so excited.”

Anna blushed. In a few minutes she would be
going downstairs to see Alex. Her groom and future husband.
Butterflies fluttered in her stomach and her nausea returned.

“Anna, are you all right?” Ilsa asked with
concern in her voice.

“I...I don’t feel well.”

Ilsa said something in German to Brigitte,
who rushed out of the room, and then led Anna into the bathroom.
She wet a washcloth and put it on the back of her neck.