The Love Laws (30 page)

Stepping
outside onto the sidewalk next to her former protégé, Jamie pried the printout
from Cathy’s hand and scanned it quickly. Oh God. It was worse than she
remembered. She sounded like a bitter hag. No wonder Cathy was enraged.

“Listen.
Cat. I’m sorry. I made a mistake.” She shrugged her shoulders helplessly. “I
should have talked to you before publishing this. I’ll call Jeff immediately
and have it pulled, ok?” Jamie said with genuine contrition.

Cathy
shook her head. “Jamie. It’s too late for that. I already tried it. Jeff isn’t
budging. Your latest entry is generating a lot of buzz. None of it good but
apparently any buzz is good buzz as far as he’s concerned.” Her hard tone made
it clear that Cathy was beyond disappointed in Jeff’s part in this debacle. “Regardless,
The Love Laws are history.”

Jamie
gasped. “What? Why? Admittedly, this isn’t my best work. But it’s still good
advice. Women should beware of womanizers. I don’t see why stating the obvious
is so awful. I mean, I still should have consulted with you and I could have
toned it down a little but the article itself does have value. I didn’t say
anything that wasn’t true.”

“Jamie.
Don’t you see?” Cathy poked the paper in Jamie’s hand with one accusing finger.
“This isn’t advice. We started this because we wanted to generate some
publicity for your store and advance my career, but at the heart of these
articles we were actually trying to help women to connect and find
relationships. This…” She poked the piece of paper again, harder this time.
“…Is about you and your own issues. It’s obvious to everyone who reads it that
you have some personal vendetta against womanizers and you’re using The Love
Laws to voice your own prejudices. And I can’t be a part of that. I wanted to
get ahead but not like this. So as far as I’m concerned our collaboration is
over.”

Jamie
felt hot tears flooding her eyes. She could understand why Cathy was so upset
but this seemed blatantly unfair. One little misguided article and Cathy would
abandon their entire project? Why was she surprised? People always demanded so
much from her now. Back when she was working at the Kitty-Kat people assumed
she’d screw up. Now that she was trying to be more responsible it seemed like
she wasn’t allowed to make mistakes. Everyone expected her to be perfect.
Jessica, Duncan, Clay. All of them were constantly criticizing her. Now even
Cathy was judging her.

Needing
an excuse to hide her burning face, Jamie turned slightly away from Cathy and
looked down the bustling street. She cleared her throat and was about to
respond to Cathy’s announcement when a familiar neat figure caught her eye.

“Let’s
go inside. Please.”

Cathy
turned her head and followed Jamie’s terrified gaze. She waved grimly when she
saw her brother approaching with a tray full of coffees. Turning her puzzled gaze
to Jamie she noticed that the formerly confident woman before her seemed to
have shrunk in on herself. She’d gone even paler than usual and appeared to be
trembling.

“Jamie?
Are you ok?” Cathy asked, concerned.

Jamie
was reaching for the door as if her life depended on getting inside but her
unsteady hands couldn’t seem to be able to get the key in the lock. So instead
she leaned against it, holding onto the knob to keep from falling onto the
dirty pavement. “I just don’t want you two ganging up on me.” Her voice sounded
very young and just a tad hysterical.

This
had never happened before but Jamie suspected she was having some kind of
anxiety attack. She didn’t seem to have much control over her body. She felt
icy cold and unable to focus. Her breathing became shallow and her pulse
sounded unnaturally loud in her ears. Around her the pedestrians and cars
speeding past faded into the background until she was barely aware of anything
around her.

 Countless
images of her parent’s disapproving faces flashed before Jamie’s eyes and she
felt herself needing to flee, to escape from those looks. She attempted to take
control and slip into her defiant act but she found herself completely unable
to summon the energy it took to pretend she didn’t give a damn. Because the
truth was that her friend’s opinions mattered and this time she deserved their
anger and disappointment. No amount of pretense was going to hide the fact that
she had behaved like a complete bitch.

Cathy’s
eyebrows drew down in puzzlement as she watched Jamie struggle. She was acting
very odd, almost like she was in a trance. Despite her anger Cathy reached out
to try and comfort her but Jamie flinched away from her hand. “Ganging up?
Seriously? That’s what you think will happen?” Cathy asked softly.

Jamie
tried to focus on Cathy’s voice and appear normal. Despite everything she still
couldn’t allow any weakness to show. She wanted to shrug casually but the
movement was beyond her. She took a couple of deep breaths and then spoke in a
hollow voice that didn’t sound like her at all. “I screwed up. Now you both can
stand around and make me feel like shit. Then you can take off and talk about
what a disappointment I am.”

Cathy
took a step back. “Jamie. I’m pissed off about the article. I have a right to
feel that way, don’t you think?”

Jamie
nodded and then looked down at the ground. That overwhelming feeling of panic
was passing. She still couldn’t bear to see the look on Clay’s face when he
reached them but her body was no longer in flight mode. She would have to face
him without her usual mask in place and it terrified her - made her feel naked
and vulnerable.

The
old Jamie would have tossed her hair back, looked insolent and pretended she
was above reproach but she just couldn’t manage that much false bravado anymore.
Clay would be rightfully furious with her for betraying his sister and she owed
him an honest response. He was a gossip and didn’t shy away from stating his
opinion, even if it was hurtful or unwanted, but he was also incredibly loyal.
He would take his sister’s side in this disaster. And Jamie would be left alone.
With her failing store and that was about it. Abandoned. Again.

In
her attempt to finally be a success she realized that all she’d actually succeeded
in was alienating everyone in her life. Jessica was already so wrapped up in
her new husband and upcoming baby that Jamie rarely saw her. Once she heard
about what Jamie had done Jess would probably give her the silent treatment for
a few months. And her husband would be thrilled.Then there was Kevin. Oh God.
How she wished she’d handled everything with him differently. She’d challenged
him to be monogamous and he’d done so. With his best friend’s evil ex. She
suspected that she’d actually driven him into Kerry’s arms. When what she’d
really wanted was to keep him for herself - when it was convenient for her and
on her own terms.

Hot
tears started trickling down her face. She hated herself for her weakness but
couldn’t help it. She began to turn away, needing to escape before Clay reached
them and told her he was done with her. But it was too late. Suddenly strong
arms were peeling her away from the door and wrapping around her protectively.

“James.
Where do you think you’re going?” Clay’s soft voice murmured in her ear. “I
hope you weren’t thinking you could get away from me. Because no matter what fucked
up thing you do, I will always be here for you. Don’t you know that, you crazy
broad?”

With
a strangled cry of relief Jamie turned into his embrace and breathed in his
familiar expensive scent. They were nearly the same height so she was able to
bury her hot face in his warm neck. “Aren’t you pissed off at me?” She mumbled
against his shoulder.

“Me?
Of course. I live to be pissed off at you. We give each other a hard time.
That’s our thing. But at the end of the day I know you better than anyone and
there’s obviously something very wrong in your world. Otherwise you wouldn’t
have written that whole man-whore rant. So, I’ll leave the righteous
indignation to my sister and I’ll just be here to listen when you need it,
okay?”

That
was all it took. Jamie finally let go of her iron control and let the sobs
flow. Her shoulders heaved and she was getting Clay’s immaculate chartreuse
silk shirt all wet but it didn’t matter. In fact, it felt amazing. She was
crying in front of her friends and the entire world and she didn’t care. It was
such a relief to let her emotions out for a change. As ridiculous as she must
look to a casual observer, she knew she needed to release all of the anger,
frustration and fear she’d been holding onto since her store began to fail.

Clay
held her tightly and murmured words of comfort as Cathy looked on, holding the
tray of coffees and watching in complete confusion as the normally
self-contained Jamie had a complete and utter meltdown.

Jamie
sobbed once more and then laughed. “You’re not going to give me a hard time
about the article? Are you serious?”

“Of
course. When am I not serious?” He smoothed back her hair and nudged her chin
up so he could look at her tear-stained face. “You may have gone a little scary
man-hater, but you didn’t actually castrate one as far as I know. And whoever
you were trying to geld probably deserved it. So give me the details and Cat
can get over herself.” He grinned when Cathy squawked in indignation behind
them. “Now, can we move this pity party inside?”

*****

Ten
minutes later Jamie and Clay were comfortably situated on the lounge in the
observation area of Hidden Treasures. Cathy had left under the pretense of
going to the paper to beg Jeff to remove Love Law #7 from the website again. In
reality, Clay had practically shooed her out the door.

Now
he was eyeing Jamie over the rim of his coffee cup. “Ok. Now that my sister’s
evil clone has vacated the building, why don’t you tell me what made you spew
venom all over her precious articles?”

Jamie,
still shaky from her earlier panic attack, was able to summon a weak smile.
“Clay. Honestly. She had every reason to be pissed. I did go behind her back
and publish that piece of crap.”

“Oh
please. Like the other articles were journalistic gold? I don’t think so. They’re
fluff. Entertaining fluff but hardly ground-breaking,” he said with a
dismissive wave of his hand. “She’s taking this thing much too seriously. And
the bottom line is that you’ve helped her so much over the last two weeks. Even
if you started spouting Nazi propaganda she’d still owe you a huge debt. So,
she needs to get hold of herself. Can’t imagine what she was thinking, coming
here and trying to make you feel guilty. Couldn’t she see that you were having
some kind of conniption fit out there? I honestly wanted to slap the smug right
off of her.” He shook his head in disbelief. “I think you’ve created a monster.
I liked her better when she was scared of her own hair brush.”

“Clay.
You don’t mean that. You have to be proud of Cathy. She’s made so much progress
in the past few weeks. And her articles have been really amazing. She’s a great
writer and you know it.”

“Maybe.
But that still doesn’t make it ok for her to ignore what’s really going on with
you.”

Jamie
tried for a blank look. “Going on? I’m just a little stressed. With the
articles and selling the house and everything.”

Clay
sighed. “Seriously? After that article? And the sobfest? You’re going to
pretend some cowboy didn’t take you for a ride and then leave you at the stable
with your saddle all askew?”

“That
is the weirdest metaphor I’ve ever heard.”

Clay
gave her a withering look. “I was trying to be delicate. Fine. What I should
have said was you finally got some cock but the dick-head attached to the cock
wasn’t interested in more than getting fucked. Am I close?”

Jamie
widened her eyes in shock at his raw language. “Wow. That’s really beautiful.
You should write poetry.”

“I
know. It’s a gift. Now. Am I close?”

She
looked down at her coffee for a moment. “It’s a bit more complicated than that.
But something along those lines. Yeah.”

Clay
sighed and drew her into his side. “James. I know it sucks to be the one left
wanting more but it happens to the best of us. Even me, if you can believe it.”

Jamie
had to hide her smile at Clay’s statement. “Well, actually it was me who left.
Him. In the back seat of his car. Mostly naked.”

“No
way. The writer? You left that fine ass buck naked? In public? Nice one.” He
held his hand up for a high five which Jamie returned with a giggle. “So what’s
the problem? Seems like he should be the one writing whiny-ass articles about
the cold-hearted, yet dead-sexy, red-head who used and abused him.”

She
set her coffee down on a nearby table and turned to look at her friend. “God.
You make it sound so calculated. But that’s exactly what I did, isn’t it?” She
covered her face with her hands. “I finally rejected him too many times and he
gave up.”

“People
do have a tendency to do that eventually.” Clay said with a dry chuckle. “The
ones who don’t fall into the stalker category anyway. But the question is why
did you hump and dump anyway? He’s hot, smart, hot, successful, hot and into
you. Why throw that away? And don’t tell me it’s the whole man-whore thing
because I know that’s just an excuse. You’re not that close-minded. If you were
you certainly wouldn’t be best friends with me. I make your writer look like a
debutante.”