The Next Door Boys (7 page)

He laughed quietly, and I knew he had me. “1545. Sorry, Leigh.”

“Darn.” I grabbed his arm and leaned my head against his shoulder. He let me relax onto him. Our time together over the past year and our missing sibling had made Jaron and I closer than any other brother and sister I knew. I sat there until I was wholly comfortable and starting to get bored. Jaron never moved until I did. He was going to make someone a great husband.

“You're a good brother, Jaron.” I kissed him on the cheek.

“The best.” He smiled back.

“You have to feel pretty good about one of your converts going to the temple, huh?” I nudged him with my elbow.

“He's not my convert.” Jaron shook his head slightly.

“Did you or did you not baptize him?” I raised my eyebrows.

“Brian's had to overcome more than a lot of people do, and he's one of the best men I know.” Jaron and I both glanced over to Brian, who was talking quietly with our bishop. “It's his story to tell, though, not mine.”

“I'm keeping you from talking to him.” I'd been selfish with Jaron's time.

“It's okay.” He patted my arm.

“I'm done.” I stood up. “Thanks, Jaron.”

“Anytime.” He moved toward Brian.

I glanced back at them as I neared the doorway; Jaron's arm was around Brian's shoulders. I was happy for Jaron having someone he was so close to. Brian's eyes caught mine just before I walked out. My breath caught, and I felt bad for interrupting their conversation by staring.

I rolled over and checked the clock. 1 a.m. There was no reason for me to be unable to sleep. I'd been at the temple earlier in the day, and I'd caught up in math. I grabbed a sweatshirt, unsure of how warm it would be. I pulled it over my head as I opened my front door and stepped out into the backyard.

“You're up late again.” Brian shut his car door behind him.

“Yeah, sometimes I can't sleep,” I answered. What did he do that kept him out so late?

“Yeah, you said that last time.” His mouth started to pull into a smile. “Well, I'm off to try to get some rest. See ya tomorrow.” He waved at me.

When he passed me, all I could smell was cigarettes and alcohol. Where had he been? He'd just gone to the temple earlier in the day. Had he smelled this bad the last time I saw him out here in the middle of the night? I wasn't sure.

Two more nights that week I saw Brian drive home after midnight. Both times I crouched low in my hammock, hoping he wouldn't see me in the dark.

I wanted to avoid Brian at all costs. How do you confront someone about something like that? Coming home in the middle of the night the way he did? Should I say something to Jaron? Should I talk to Brian? I didn't feel as though I knew him well enough to. No matter how I worded it, it would sound like some sort of accusation. I didn't want to start an argument with my brother's best friend. The only thing I could think to do was keep my distance, at least for a while.

six

“There you are!” Jaron called as I walked toward his car after class.

“Here I am.” I stopped in front of him.

“I thought we'd visit Mom and Dad this weekend. Brian needs Dad's help with something, and I know Mom wants to see you.” He turned to unlock his car.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, she probably does.”

“And…” he looked hesitant. “Brian said he saw you outside a few times, in the middle of the night. If you're not sleeping, Leigh…” He climbed in, and I walked around to the other side of his car.

“Thanks, Jaron. I'm well aware,” I said as I climbed in.

He didn't say anything else.

We'd be taking a drive in the car to Mom and Dad's house… with Brian. There would be no avoiding him then. Jaron started his car, and I almost asked about Brian and why he was out so late, but I didn't really want to continue the subject and draw attention to myself.

I walked up the driveway after a meeting at the church and saw Brian alone on the porch.

“Hey, Leigh?” He stood up. “Do you have a sec?”

I exhaled hard. I couldn't avoid the confrontation forever, but I still didn't want it to happen. I jerked my shoulder up, raising my backpack further onto my back, and walked across the driveway. Brian stepped down from their porch and waited for me.

I stopped in front of him and looked up. He was as tall as Jaron, just over six feet, but as broad as my dad. It was more apparent when I stood facing him. I'd been avoiding him, and I suddenly worried that I'd been too obvious about it.

“Looking forward to seeing your parents?” he asked.

“I guess.” I wasn't sure what to say, and I didn't know what he wanted. He was making small talk, but for what purpose? He could have just waved from the porch if he was worried about being friendly.

Brian concentrated on something really hard, his forehead wrinkled up. “Okay, I'm just going to say it.” He let out a short breath. “I feel like for some reason you don't like me.”

I opened my mouth to say something. I had no idea what.

“No, hold on. It's okay. You don't have to like everyone you meet.” He held his hand up between us. “Your brother mentioned something earlier today, and I feel weird about being invited to your parents’ house. I want us to be able to get along, that's all.” He looked so… nice. “Am I doing something that's bothering you?” He asked, giving me a half smile.

“Look,” I started, “it's just weird how often you're out late—like, really late.”

“You're up to notice.” He held back a smile. Brian had this small, smirkish grin that seemed nearly permanent.

I ignored him. “I don't know what you do with your weekend nights, and I really don't want to know. I do know that when you come home you reek like cigarettes and alcohol, and I find it offensive and it makes me wonder about your seriousness in… everything.”

“Wow.” He pursed his lips together, a little surprised but also maybe a little amused. “I work as a bartender.” He paused, waiting for my reaction.

I was too stunned to react.

“I know it's not the greatest environment to be in, but I only have to do it two days a week or so to pay the bills and continue my education. If I need a weekend off or need to trade shifts, my boss is pretty flexible, which is great if I'm able to get my son up here for a visit.”

Brian was a bartender? Did he even understand the Word of Wisdom? “Wait, you have a son?” I sifted back through what he'd said.

He laughed. “Your brother didn't tell you?”

“Uh… no.” That wasn't the crazy part. “And you work in a bar?”

“Guess I'm not making any points here, huh?” He chuckled a little, as if my response didn't bother him in the least.

“Umm…”

“You know, Leigh, we haven't spoken much, but you're usually better with words than this.” His smirk was still intact.

“Well, cut me some slack here!” I gestured upwards with both hands in the air. “You just told me you have a kid and work in a bar!”

“I figured Jaron would have said something.” Brian shrugged. He looked completely unbothered by my reaction.

“Well, he didn't.” What was I supposed to think? Where was I supposed to look? I took a deep breath. This whole revelation really shouldn't affect me. “Jaron has this thing about people telling their own stories.” I shook my head. It's why he'd told no one about me being sick.

“Are we friends? Do you think I'm some sort of crazy, horrible person? What's going on?” He leaned his head over to try and catch my eyes. He still wore his half-smile like he thought this was all very funny.

“I… I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning.” I looked up and let his eyes catch mine.

“Okay.” He leaned back a little, and his smile left.

I felt something in my chest, heavy like guilt or the knowledge that I should do something else, something more.

“We're okay.” I nodded even though I was still reeling from our conversation.

He stuck out his hand for me to take. I took it, and we shook once. Brian's hands were twice the size of mine and much warmer. I felt a little better about our conversation after our shake.

I let go of his hand and turned to walk home. How did I know so little about him? Was he married? How old was his kid? And he worked in a bar? That could not be healthy for a new member. Was I being too judgmental? Should I be judging him? Was he someone I shouldn't spend time with?

As I opened my door, I remembered how Jaron felt about Brian. How much he looked up to him and what he said Brian had overcome to get to where he was as a member. I felt as if I should share Jaron's opinion and be impressed that Brian lived his life so well. Except how do you work in a bar? And what were the chances of me being able to sleep after that conversation? And why couldn't I force my brain to stop asking questions?

“Leigh, you look really tired,” Jaron said as we filled his car for our weekend at home.

“I am really tired.” I widened my eyes at him.

“Don't you have those… things?” He referred to my sleeping pills, which I avoided unless in absolute need.

I rolled my eyes.

“You'd better get some shut-eye before Mom sees you. Try to nap in the car.”

“I planned on it.” I smiled smugly and crawled in the backseat.

Brian caught our conversation, and I could see him give my brother a questioning look as he walked around to his side. Jaron didn't say anything.

It didn't take me long before I rested in that happy place of being not quite awake and not quite asleep. I could hear them talking but didn't pay attention to the words. The sun shined warm on my face and kept me relaxed. Then I heard my name in the front seat.

“So, your sister, Leigh—is she okay?” Brian asked. “I overheard your conversation.”

I kept still but listened closely.

“Yeah, I think so. She gets tired. She can't sleep and then she'll kind of crash. No one is calling her cured yet, they're calling her ‘in remission.’” Jaron paused. “She had cancer last year.”

“She had cancer?” Brian asked. I could hear the surprise in his voice.

“Yeah. I didn't want to tell anyone. It seems kind of private, you know?” It was private; I'd told very few people, but it didn't keep word from getting out. “I just—I'm a little overprotective of her, and I wanted you to know why.”

“Let me know if I can do anything, okay?” It was silent for a moment. “What… um…”

Jaron continued without any more prompting. “It was ovarian cancer. I remember when Mom first told me, she had to get special permission from my mission president so we could talk. My brain stopped functioning when Mom said the word ‘cancer.’ She won't be able to have kids. I'm sure that's harder on her than she lets on, or maybe she hasn't realized the ramifications yet… or maybe she does and I'm not giving her enough credit.” I heard Jaron shift in his seat.

“You should have seen her, Brian. I was glad I came home early from my mission. I'll never regret that decision. I got home near the beginning of her chemo treatments.” He stopped for a minute. “I barely recognized her.” He sounded so sad. I wanted to tell him what I wanted to tell everyone, that it would have been so much harder to see one of them go through what I went through than to just do it myself. “She was so thin and pale. She'd already lost her hair. I was overprotective of her before, but now… now it's hard not to follow her to class, to check on her every night.”