The Rake and the Recluse REDUX (a time travel romance) (79 page)

She did. She watched as he bowed his head and she felt his warm, wet tongue lick and explore. Her breath fled and her lungs heaved, trying to catch air. She saw her skin flush, her breasts lift, the nipples tightly ruching. Her face contorted, and she watched the fleeting expressions change; she saw what she had seen in him, And she realized these were all the faces of passion. His tongue dipped and she cried out again, gasping a breath as one of her hands flew to tangle in his hair.

Her body tensed, her legs fell open, her knees drew up, her toes curled against his shoulders, and her fingers bunched. She felt the tension grow then pulse, and she screamed. He stood before her swiftly and pushed into her, and in two thorough strokes she broke, writhing on the bed beneath him while he held her close.

Perry caressed her dewed skin, drawing a flush across her body, willing it to his command. He moved her back to the kneeling position and went to the basin, replacing the cap he’d used to prevent her becoming with child. He mounted the bed behind her on his knees. Sliding her onto his lap, he entered her once again—this time from behind—and she cried out.

“Watch,” he reminded her, and her head fell back to his sturdy shoulder, her eyes open, staring into the mirror. His arms wrapped about her, one hand going to the soft mound at the crux of her hips, the other claiming one of her pale breasts, teasing it to fullness. He found in this position he was required to hold on tighter to her, against the sway and the speed of the train. He trailed kisses down the side of her neck, breathing heavily at her jaw.

She felt his pace, matched to the chug of the train on the track, and followed him fitfully toward the shining release she knew awaited her. He lifted his gaze as he slowed their pace, his eyes catching hers in the glass.

His hands caressed and held, and he bade her follow them, trailing down to her knees, then back to her thighs, to her hips, then to where he gently rubbed her soft, untouched, stomach. His hands sinking lower with each stroke.

“Watch,” he said again. He spread her knees further apart so she could easily see his intimate stroke, the caress of his cadence.

She was mesmerized, overtaken by the sight of him entering and retreating, the sound of their heavy mingling breaths, the feel of his strength so close to her, surrounding her, penetrating her, carrying her, pushing her, pulling her, drawing her toward a second higher peak. Her lids fell again.

“Watch!” he commanded. His jaw clenched, and she saw the fear and the pain flash across his face and it drove her to the edge, forced her over. She collapsed and he caught her, their eyes holding as her pulsing sheath drew him along.

The second his release came she saw his face change; his jaw released and his eyes drifted closed, his hands clenched and lifted from the bed, taking her with him, pulling her onto him and fusing them together, the sway of the train lulling their passion.

A loud knock sounded at the door, and Perry swept the blankets over Lilly as he sat up in the bed. “Come.”

“Milord, the tray you requested,” the porter said as he entered. Perry waved him toward the table and he moved quickly, bowing before he left. Perry pulled his drawers on, then walked over to fill a plate with fruits, cheeses, and crusty breads. He brought it back to the bed, pulling the blankets down to find Lilly wide-eyed but still in her little cocoon. He smiled.

“Lilly, my sweet, you should eat. We will be reaching Manchester soon, where we will be allowed a short foray into town.” She shifted, wiggling her way up to sit. She rested against the pillows and looked at him patiently. “How are you?”

She smiled serenely, and he noted it wasn’t quite the smile he was familiar with seeing on a partner after a full day of such passion. She still appeared wary and overwrought, not quite as sated as he was known to leave women. It brought him a sense of incompletion, almost incompetence, which unseated the masculine feeling of victory that traditionally elated his mood after a tryst.

He lifted a strawberry to her mouth and watched as her lips parted. When she took it in, his stomach tensed. In the entirety of his life he’d never felt so affected by a woman. He now realized the piece that had always been missing from his liaisons was the need to protect. Never had he wanted to protect a woman, to safeguard not only her body, but her mind.

He followed the strawberry with a scone and some clotted cream. She followed that with moans and sighs.

An hour later they were dressed and descending to the platform, Lilly clutching his greatcoat as she had when they’d first arrived at that inn. He decided what she really needed was a good dose of confidence, though retaining a healthy bit of that wariness would go far for her self-preservation. Somewhere between caution and self-assurance was the precarious position that would keep her from again being targeted as someone’s victim.

He unlatched her from the folds of his greatcoat and pulled her to his side, placing her hand on his arm and drawing her spine straight and tall next to him. She tensed, and he moved his other hand to cover hers, willing the security he provided to pacify her nerves. He saw her features relax incrementally, and as they walked through the station, she glanced around with a quick grin.

“What do you intend to do in London?” he asked as their next train lurched forward. They had yet another private car, and Perry was looking forward to the afternoon ride.

“Whatever you wish, milord,” she replied quietly from the seat across from him.

“I realize that you feel you have no choice but to do as I wish, but I would hope you understand that our relationship has much changed since I informed you of your status in my household as a servant.”

“Yes, milord, but there’s no chance of anythin’ between us, even were I to wish it. I would never find comfort in your world. ‘Tis not possible.”

“I’m well aware of our current dilemma and the need for privacy. What I want to know is what need you have of me at this point. I don’t want to make it seem as though I have ulterior motives in this, and I believe the best way to go about our relationship is to be perfectly honest with one another. As I’ve said, and will remind you again, you are charged with our present, and our future. I will do nothing you are not comfortable with, I will do nothing you do not want. For however long you wish to be obliged.”

She blushed at his speech and attempted to dodge his gaze, but he wouldn’t allow her to look away. “Milord, I— I’d appreciate a position within your household. So that I may, uh—” She closed her eyes, then looked into his directly. “So that we may continue. I believe I’ve much to learn, and I believe, if you’re willing, you’ve much to teach me.” She took a deep breath. “I know at some point we must part, and keeping that in mind, being truly careful, you can still help me. I understand your life, and I won’t keep you from it. You are a rake. It is your nature, as I understand it, to not settle.”

He watched as her hands trembled, twisting in her skirts. “Lilly, for as long as we are together, there will be none other. I would not do that to anyone, not even to you. I will of course make the rounds, present myself to the
ton
as is expected of me, but I will not extend any private invitations for as long as you have need of me.”

Her eyes grew wide and her mouth dropped into an
O
. Then she looked away, flustered. “I would not ask that of you. I don’t want for you to change. There is no need,” she whispered.

He reached across to her and stroked her hand, then lifted it and placed a kiss in her palm. She watched his movements carefully as her skin prickled with the awareness of his proximity. She hoped she would be able to remain in his household without the entire staff being made aware of her position.
Positions
, she thought, and pressed a fist to her forehead.

She stood and leaned toward the window, letting the chill of the night sink into her hands through her gloves. She heard him rise, felt him move to her, then closed her eyes on the anticipation of what he intended. His hands came to the window just outside of her own. She felt his tongue rise from the edge of her blouse to the nape of her neck, and she shivered at the long stroke.

His hands left the window and went to her gloves, slowly pulling them off. Tendrils of excitement spread through her fingers as they were swept away. She shook her head and felt him step back, then lost the warmth of her cape when he took it from her shoulders. She was not long bereft, for his warm hands sank through the fabric covering her shoulders, then lower, unbuttoning her blouse and loosening the simple corset.

He pushed her forward, her breasts meeting the glass of the window. She gasped from the chill as he raised her skirts.

“You want the rake?”

“I do not know what I want.”

“Tell me what you want.”

“I don’t know what I want. How can I know what I want?”

“Perhaps some variety will narrow down the choices.”

He pulled her back against him. She realized he had released his manhood and now pressed it against her backside.

“Milord.”

“I warned you not to call me that.”

“Don’t stop.”

He didn’t.

She hadn’t exactly planned for this. She thought she would be sad, letting him touch her, letting him
teach
her, and then walking away. But she’d measured the options. It had all happened so fast the night before that there was no real consideration. They drove each other easily to the act, pushing one another as the other pulled back, until ultimately there was no room for retreat.

This morning, as the sun broke and she watched his face come back to a wakeful state, she became aware of her peril. He was devastatingly handsome. She knew she’d thought so before, but the realization hit her like waves upon the beach. It would drift away, then come crashing down on her suddenly, without warning, stealing her very breath.

Even if she were to fall in love with this man, even if she were to lose herself in those eyes, she knew beyond doubt that being
with
him was impossible. She promised herself she would be happy to learn from him. To let him teach her what she wanted to know; to help her overcome the fears that plagued her, to feel anything again without pain, to not be afraid. She promised this, but feared that it was merely a delay of the inevitable.