The Return of Brody McBride (22 page)

“What? How do you know they didn’t just put her in there before you arrived?”

“Autumn told me later at the hospital.”

“Hospital?”

“I’ve never seen anyone so listless. They’d barely fed her, just some French fries and pancakes. They hadn’t given her anything to drink. She was severely dehydrated. Roxy had slapped her. Autumn’s cheek was bruised. I’d never even given her a little swat on the butt.” Rain swiped at the tears on her face and went on. “I grabbed her and headed for the door. She held me so tight, like she was terrified I’d leave her there.

“The guy blocked my way out and said the eight grand had only bought me time enough to make sure Autumn was in one piece. They wanted more, and I didn’t have it.”

“How’d you get out of there?”

“Sheer determination and force. When I tried to shove past the guy, he grabbed me and Autumn. I struggled and managed to knee him in the balls, but Roxy grabbed me just as I got the door open. I don’t know what came over me, but I punched her in the mouth, split her lip and made her scream. It was all I needed to get past them and haul ass out of there.”

“What the hell. That bitch. Unbelievable.”

“I’d have done anything to get her back.”

“Of course you would, but that bitch didn’t think twice about hurting you or Autumn.” He vibrated with the need to find Roxy and that guy and make them pay. “If something happened to you, to her, I don’t know what I would have done.”

“I took Autumn to the hospital. I could barely get her to open her eyes. After answering a lot of questions and getting my hand looked at . . .”

“What happened to your hand?”

“I broke it when I popped Roxy.” She went on like it was nothing. “The cops asked a lot of questions about Autumn’s condition and why she lives with me. I called Pop to check on Dawn and tell him what happened. He told me Owen was in town dealing with your father’s death. Pop spoke to him and sent him to me at the hospital. Being Autumn’s uncle and a lawyer went a long way to the cops leaving me alone and letting me keep Autumn.”

“Why didn’t you have Owen call me then?”

“He wanted to, but I talked him out of it.”

He shoved his hands into his jeans pockets and stared over her shoulder at the lights of the cabin behind her. Dark as it was outside, he could still see everything, including the regret and need for him to understand written all over her face.

“Please listen to me, Brody. I wasn’t trying to punish you by keeping them from you. You were about to be shipped overseas to Afghanistan. Your response to Owen about your father’s death told us just how much you wanted to leave this place behind. I don’t know what it’s like to be a soldier, but I know enough to realize you didn’t need to worry about two kids and what Roxy was doing back here.”

“I could have helped you, sent you money.”

“Helped me from a country halfway around the world where you were facing life and death each and every day. How would you have been a father to those girls? By sending them letters? They were three years old. They didn’t know who you were, except for a picture in a frame. How could I explain to them anything you’d written when they didn’t know who you are, or if you were coming back?”

“Better for me to die over there never knowing I had them,” he shot back.

“What do you want me to say? I made the best choices I could for those girls. Autumn was in no condition for you to come rushing back, a stranger in her life, who might take her away from me, too.”

“I’d have never taken her from you,” he said, furious she’d even think it.

“I couldn’t take that chance,” she shouted back. “I couldn’t risk her mental state at that time. Brody, please understand, after I got her to the hospital, she was a mess. She wouldn’t speak. She clung to me, and I had to stay in the bed with her, or she’d scream. Her voice was so hoarse, and she’d have nightmares.

“After a week with a psychiatrist, I decided to take her home. She wasn’t responding to him. I had a long talk with the doctor, he gave me some advice on how to handle her. When I brought her home, I got a few books and I worked with her. She didn’t speak for almost a month. When she finally started coming around, it was at night when we’d lay in bed together. She had to sleep with the light on and always with me.

“You have to understand, before this happened she was a happy little girl, always ready with a smile. She wasn’t shy, but exuberant, like her sister.”

“There’s a definite difference in their personalities.”

“There always was, but Autumn never used to be so reserved, afraid of shadows. Roxy changed her, made her something she’d have never been, except for those three days with Roxy that stole the little girl I’d raised until then. It took a lot of patience and time to discover what happened those three days.”

“I have a feeling I don’t want to know,” Brody confessed.

“If you don’t, I’ll keep it to myself. The point is that Roxy can never take her from me again. Autumn won’t survive. She’s sensitive, has always been that way. Roxy has no idea what she did to that little girl because she only ever thinks of herself.”

“What did she do to Autumn?”

“Besides locking her in a dark closet and slapping her more than once for crying. Autumn was terrified. She didn’t know Roxy and that man. They scared her, yelled at her, mistreated her. Locked in that closet. Autumn heard what she thought was Roxy being hurt, maybe killed. She thought she was next.”

“What?”

“It took me a little while to sort it out from the snippets of information I gathered from Autumn over several days. I think she heard Roxy and that man having sex. Rough, loud, sex. Imagine a little girl hearing those kinds of sounds. Not loving gasps and sighs, but flesh slapping, dirty talk, and a lot of moans and gasps and you’re three and locked in the dark with people you don’t know and all you want is your mommy.”

“Holy Christ,” Brody swore.

“No matter what, we have to protect Autumn from her. Under no circumstances can Roxy ever be left alone with her.”

“You’d actually let Roxy see her?”

“I might not have a choice. She’s Autumn’s mother.”

“You’re her mother. Roxy was just an incubator. I swear to you, Rain, I’ll never let her take Autumn from us again. I’ll do whatever I have to, to make sure that never happens.”

“Sign over guardianship to me. It’s the only way I’ll have any say in what happens to her.”

“Marry me,” he countered. “Then you’ll be her stepmother legally. You can adopt her.”

“Seriously, Brody. Just like that, standing in the dark, no flowers, candles, dinner, you on bended knee with a ring. Nothing. Just forgive and forget and be my wife for Autumn’s sake.”

“I’ll give you all of that and more if you say yes.” He would, too. He’d give her anything. Still, he knew she wouldn’t. Not now. Not yet. “And it’s not for Autumn’s sake alone. It’s for mine.”

“Wow. Lucky me,” she quipped.

“Tell me what you want, Rain.”

“I want the girls to be happy and healthy the rest of their lives. I want a normal life. I don’t want to have to worry about money,” she said, then held up the check he’d given her earlier. “Check,” she said, signing it in the air. “One item down.”

Brody wrapped one arm around her waist and pulled her close. With his other hand, he brushed the wisps of hair from her cheek. “Tell me what you want from me.”

“I want what anybody wants, what you want. To feel safe and loved. To know nothing can ever come between us again. I want to trust you and know that when I have my back turned you won’t jab a knife between my shoulders and into my heart.”

“Brutal, honey.”

“Then you have some idea of how I felt when you left me.”

“You know how I felt being away from you,” he countered. Taking her hand, he not so gracefully kneeled down in front of her on one knee.

“Brody . . .”

“I got it,” he said, wincing in pain. “Will you do me the honor of coming inside and having dinner with me?”

“There’s a bed in there,” she teased.

“I know,” he said with a small groan. “I’ll behave myself and work on rebuilding the trust I shattered.”

“All right, dinner.” She smiled down at him.

“Mind helping me up?” he asked, only half kidding.

“Oh, Brody.” She made a grab for him as he stood. His forehead hit her chin, cracking her teeth together, making her let go and fall back. He grabbed her as they both stood and pulled her to his chest, their eyes locked.

“Man, that hurt.” Her hands gripped his biceps as she worked her jaw to ease the sting. Unable to help himself, he leaned down and kissed the side of her face, planting soft kisses along her jaw to her chin, then moving up and taking her already open mouth in a deep, sensuous kiss. Her grip on his arms grew tight and she drew him in with a tentative slide of her tongue over his. She opened to him and pressed her body down the length of his.

He wanted to devour, to take everything she offered and more. That’s why he gently brushed his lips over her parted ones, taking in the breath that escaped her lips in a soft sigh before he let her go and put her away from him. His whole body screamed in agony from the separation, but he owed her a lot more than one long talk and taking her to bed without any of the trappings that went into a relationship. He’d cheated her out of so much. He couldn’t bring himself to give into what he wanted without thinking first of the things she’d asked from him. Trust. Feeling safe and loved. Knowing he’d never pull her close, only to turn away from her again.

“Come up to the house. Talk to me about our girls.”

“Will you tell me about . . . everything?”

“Everything?”

“What your life has been like these last years. Where you went, the things you’ve seen and done.”

“I don’t think you want to know the things I’ve done,” he said, thinking of everything he could tell her but would only hurt her more. She knew about the other women. He wished she didn’t. Then, there were the things he’d done in the military in the name of freedom and democracy. There were a lot of good things he’d done, he guessed.

“Can’t you tell me a story without starting with ‘. . . There was this blonde . . .’” she said with half a smile.

He couldn’t help himself, he laughed. It was an old joke between him and Owen going back to the early days in high school when they’d tried to one up each other with the girls. Rain had been just his friend back then, and whatever trouble he and Owen stirred up, the story always started with “. . . There was this girl . . .”

Teasing, he said, “Actually, she’s a brunette.” The softness in her eyes told him she knew he was talking about her. It seemed everything meaningful in his life started with her.

Chapter Seventeen

B
RODY WALKED
R
AIN
up to the cabin, her hand safely tucked in his. By silent agreement, they didn’t speak, but let the words they’d already exchanged settle. Lord knew Brody needed time to let the anger simmering in his gut fade. He’d thank God every second of every day Rain had gone to such lengths to keep his daughter safe, unharmed by the woman who’d carried her for nine months and given birth to her.

He didn’t know how any woman could carry a life inside of them, give birth to that child, and toss it away without a single thought, except to how much money she could get for her. Every dime left to Rain by her family members. The money she needed to raise his children.

“Nice floor.”

Rain’s voice pulled him out of his dark thoughts. He squeezed her hand and glanced at the foundation and subfloor the contractor finished and now had to rework with his new floor plan.

“You like it? It’ll be a little cold in the winter, but hey, you can’t beat the view.” His gaze rose to the brilliant stars and surrounding trees and mountains.

“Planning on sleeping alfresco?”

“I want to sleep wherever you’re sleeping.” She glanced up at him through her lashes. Just to rile her, he added, “Well, not really sleeping. A whole lot of loving.”

“You think so.”

“God, I hope so.” He helped her up onto the subfloor, pulled her to the center and into his arms. He held her close and started with a step to the left, a step toward her, and then a step to the side with his left. She followed, matching him easily as they danced under the stars to the sound of crickets chirping and the occasional fish jumping in the lake. For several long minutes, they danced around the wide open floor, until he steered her back to the center and just swayed softly.

She felt so good pressed against him. The citrus scent of her hair surrounded him, drew him in. He raised his hands to her face, cupped and tilted her chin so she was looking up at him. He brushed a soft kiss on her forehead, the tip of her nose, her cheek, along her jaw. His lips pressed to her soft skin. When he reached the corner of her mouth, she sighed. The whisper of breath fanned his cheek and warmed his heart. She still loved him, responded to his touch. She gave him everything she had.

Her lips parted, and God, how he wanted to press his lips to hers and slide his tongue deep into her mouth. Taste all her secrets, erase every bad memory with something good and sweet and sultry. If he took her mouth now, he’d drag her to the floor and bury himself deep inside her. Hard and throbbing, in painful agony, the ache still nothing compared to the hurt in his heart, knowing she didn’t trust him and wasn’t ready to be his wife.

Leaving her sweet mouth, he kissed his way to her ear. “You are so beautiful.” His hands left her face, mapped her neck and skimmed down over her chest to the swell of her breasts. She sucked in a quick breath when he slid his hands over the two rounded, soft mounds to her ribs. His thumbs traced the underside of her breasts back and forth while she settled into his touch, got used to the feel of his hands on her body again.

Her head fell back, eyes closed; he kissed the column of her throat, the sweet spot near her shoulder. “You smell the same. Something sweet and flowery, like a meadow in spring.” He cupped her breasts, his thumbs brushed over her taut nipples. She squeaked and her breath hitched. When he tugged gently with her nipples caught between his index and middle finger, she sighed his name. That was just the beginning of what he wanted. Her soft moans and his name on her lips as he touched her, ignited a spark of what they’d shared before. “I carried your scent with me everywhere I went. In the desert when it was hot,” he said against her throat, “I’d think of you, suck in a ragged breath and smell you. I’d be so hard, I’d ache to be inside you again, my hands on your skin, your breath on my face, our hearts pressed together and me driving into you until you called my name.”