The Secret to Hummingbird Cake (15 page)

“This may shock you a little bit,” Laine said.

“Really?” I made a face. “Yes, because I am so sweet and innocent, your terrible deed, whatever it was, is gonna make me swoon.”

She laughed a little bit, then took a deep breath. “Do you remember Mitch Montgomery?” The name sounded familiar, but I couldn't place him.

“Maybe,” I said. “Why do I know that name?”

“He went to high school with us,” she said, “but only for our junior and senior year.”

I thought back and then it hit me. “Lots of curly black hair? Tall? Quiet guy?”

“Yep, that's him.”

“What about him?”

“He was in college at ULM the same time I was,” she said. “I had seen him on campus a few times, but he'd cut his hair short and I wasn't sure it was him, so I never spoke to him. Then one day I saw him off campus at a coffee shop.” She paused. “So we had dinner together that night and . . . breakfast the next morning.”

I stared at her. “So?”

“We had
breakfast
the next morning.”

“People eat, Laine,” I said. “What, was it like the best breakfast you've ever had? I mean . . .” And then it dawned on me. She had
breakfast
with him the next morning. “You slept with Mitch Montgomery?”

“Thank you,” she said. “You want to yell a little louder? I'm sure everybody in the barn wants to know. And there's
probably a guy on a tractor in the next parish who didn't quite catch it.”

“I'm sorry,” I said. “But, Laine . . . I mean, you're . . . you never . . . You're a virgin.”

“No, you and Ella Rae always said I was. I just never confirmed or denied.”

My mind was racing. The fact that she'd had sex with Mitch Montgomery wasn't a big deal to me, but the fact that she'd never told us was huge. “Why didn't you tell us? What happened? Where is he? Was it just a one-night thing or did you have a relationship with him? Tell me everything! Were you in love with him?”

“Seriously, Carrigan?” Laine asked. “Which question do you want me to answer first?”

“Can I tell Ella Rae?”

“Of course,” she said. “But don't scream it.”

“Ella Rae!” I yelled. “Come out here! And bring a popsicle!”

“You have always been so loud,” Laine accused, holding her ears, “and I think being preggers just makes you worse!”

Ella Rae appeared a few moments later, splattered in yellow, with a popsicle in one hand and a paintbrush in the other. “What is it?” she asked.

“Sit down,” I said. “Laine, tell her.”

Laine opened her mouth, but I changed my mind and cut her off.

“Never mind, let me,” I said.

She waved a hand. “Be my guest.”

“Laine had sex with Mitch Montgomery.”

Ella Rae frowned. “Today?”

My delight in sharing the secret was immediately deflated. “Yes, Ella Rae,” I said. “While you were painting and I was in the rocking chair, Mitch Montgomery drove up, and they had sex in the porch swing.”

Ella Rae made a face. “What are you talking about?”

Laine started laughing. “Ella Rae,” she said, “when I was in college at ULM, I had a . . . fling with Mitch Montgomery.”

Ella Rae rolled her eyes. “Whatever. You're a virgin,” she said, “and who the hell is Mitch Montgomery?”

“I am
not
a virgin.”

That was even funnier, and now all three of us were laughing, even if Ella Rae had no idea why.

“Okay, okay,” Ella Rae finally said after we'd composed ourselves. “Somebody tell me what's going on.”

Laine repeated the story, and Ella Rae listened intently. When she was finished talking, Ella Rae asked the same twenty questions I did.

“You two are the exact same person sometimes!” Laine said. “Okay, it happened my senior year. It lasted six months and it was wonderful. Yes, I was in love with him, and yes, I believe he was in love with me. And I didn't tell either of you because . . . I knew from the beginning it wouldn't last.”

We were hanging on every word she said. In some circles, a college fling wouldn't be that big a deal, but in Laine's case the news was enormous. How could she have kept this kind of secret all these years? She'd graduated from ULM nearly eight years ago.

“Why did you know it wouldn't last?” I asked. “He didn't want to move back to Bon Dieu Falls?”

Ella Rae jumped in. “He wanted to move to the city and become an actor?”

Laine got quiet again.

“What happened, Laine?” I said.

She took a deep breath. “Mitch had gotten married his freshman year at ULM. He met a girl, started dating her, she got pregnant, and they got married.”

She paused when she saw our expressions. Ella Rae and I were both stunned. Our Laine involved with a married man? “They were separated,” she said. “In fact, they had already filed the divorce papers, and that happened before I entered the picture.”

“Wow,” I said. “I knew there had to be an explanation. Not that I would judge you. I mean, things just happen sometimes. No one knows that more than I do.”

“For real,” Ella Rae said.

“Shut up, Ella Rae.”

Ella Rae rolled her eyes. “I was just trying to help.”

I ignored her and turned back to Laine. “So why didn't it work out?”

She shook her head, “I knew, in the end, he would choose his son over me.” Her eyes brimmed with tears. “I've never blamed him for that. It's what he should have done. We kept in touch for a year or so after they got back together, but I just never felt right about it. You know, a man living with his wife
and child and professing his undying love. It just felt so . . . wrong. I eventually told him not to contact me any more.”

“I'm so sorry, Laine,” I said. “You deserved so much more.”

She shrugged. “It's fine. Water under the bridge, and I don't regret it. Not a second of it. You both always wondered why I wouldn't date anybody more than once or twice. Well, Mitch was the reason. Nobody else ever measured up, I guess. Maybe it was wrong, but I loved him.”

“It wasn't wrong,” Ella Rae said. “He was almost divorced. They weren't together, and you didn't pull them apart.”

Laine nodded. “I know.”

A brief silence followed before Ella Rae asked the question that was uppermost in my mind. “Do you want to see him again? I mean, you know, since . . .”

“Since I'm dying anyway, and what difference would it make now?”

“Ugh.” I hated the death reference. “I don't think that's what—”

“Oh, come on, y'all,” Laine said. “You both promised me from the beginning we'd call a spade a spade. Don't back out on me now.”

I shook my head. “Fine, so . . . do you want us to find him? Tell him? Do you wanna speak to him again?”

She looked out across the field. “I admit I have thought about it. Just to tell him good-bye, you know? And to make sure his life has been happy.” She looked back at us. “But what good would it do now? It's done. There's no changing it.
Maybe it would just mess him up, and I would never do that to him.”

“Why? Why would you want to spare
his
feelings?” Ella Rae said.

“Ain't that the truth,” I said. If Mitch Montgomery were in front of me right now, I'd beat him to a bloody pulp. He left her and she was still trying to protect him? “What do
you
want, Laine?”

“Don't, please don't do that,” she said. “Don't be mad at him. It wasn't his fault.”

Neither of us commented. She could take up for him all she wanted to, but the fact remained she loved him and he left her. She'd been young and naïve. He was married. He had known the score. Laine was the innocent in this. But if she wanted to defend him, I'd keep my mouth shut.

“Sorry,” I said.

“Me too,” Ella Rae said. “But I don't mean it.”

Laine laughed. “I love you both for supporting me, but it's okay, really. I learned how to live with it a long time ago.”

“But tell us if you want to talk to him, Laine,” Ella Rae said. “Really. We'll find him. Promise?”

“I promise,” she said. “And listen, now is a good time to say something to both of you too.” She sat up straight and looked back and forth between us. “And just listen to me, okay? I really want to say this. I know how much you hate sappy stuff, Carrigan, but you're just gonna have to deal with it.”

I braced myself as Laine began to speak.

“I wouldn't trade a second of this friendship, do you hear
me?” she said. “Not a night when you were both too tipsy to drive and I had to. Not being yanked out to a creek at midnight so y'all could skinny-dip. Not a time when I had to stand between you and somebody you wanted to punch, Ella Rae, and not even the night you punched me. I wouldn't trade a single thing about my life, and that means Mitch too. He may have been the only man I have ever loved, but the two of you were the real loves of my life. The ones I could always count on to beat up a bully in first grade, or come to my rescue, or watch me walk to my house in the dark, or help me look for a lost dog for three days.

“I was never lonely and I was never afraid I wouldn't have somebody to do something with. I went on your honeymoon, for heaven's sake, Carrigan! Some people go their entire lives without a friend like that, and I've had two. I have been so blessed. And I am blessed now. My heart is filled with gratitude. Look at all this.” She gestured at the beauty all around us. “Who gets to go out like this? Y'all did this for me. I love you both so much.”

Ella Rae had begun crying after the first sentence and reached for Laine's hand. “I love you too. I wish you didn't have to go.”

“Me too.” She smiled and wiped her tears. “But I don't make the rules.”

I felt the tears stinging my eyes too, but willed them not to fall. Then she mentioned the Rule Maker, and my hurt turned to anger. If I live to be one hundred, I will never understand the logic behind Laine's illness. If God wanted me to talk to
him, he needed to answer some questions first, and so far, he'd been silent. So that made two of us.

“Enough,” Laine said. “I don't want to waste days on tears. Let's see the baby bump today.”

I was glad to get off the subject and raised my T-shirt.

Laine shook my belly slightly. “Asleep?” she asked.

“All morning,” I confirmed. “Probably so he can wiggle all night.”

“She,” Laine said.

I smiled. I didn't have a feeling either way, and Jack and I had decided not to find out.

“You know that's Henry the Eighth,” Ella Rae said. “Or Jack the Fourth, whatever.” She and Jack had been convinced from the start the baby was a boy.

Jack walked up the steps then and reached down to pat my belly. “Jackson Madison Whitfield the Fourth,” he said. “What's my boy been doing today?”

We became engrossed in the daily argument over the sex of my child, and the Mitch Montgomery conversation was forgotten. Later that night, while I listened to Jack's even breathing in bed beside me, I slipped out of bed, sat in the window seat, and thought about it again. Laine's confession had stunned me. And my heart ached for her. Not just because of the circumstances, but because she never shared the burden with us.

Things had always been easier for me because of Ella Rae and Laine. Whether it was choosing an outfit or some problem I couldn't solve, they had always been my sounding
boards and my touchstone. They kept me grounded, and even when they didn't agree with me, or downright told me I was an idiot, I could always take my problems to them. I couldn't imagine my life without either of them, although the day was approaching when I'd have to.

“Hey, baby.” Jack's voice was heavy with sleep. “You okay?”

“I'm fine.” I went back to bed, laid my head on his chest, and closed my eyes. But sleep didn't come for a very long time.

C
HAPTER
T
WELVE

On the first day of December I woke to muffled but clearly panicked voices. I grabbed my robe and rushed downstairs to see Jack carrying Laine in his arms out the front door. Debra had her nursing bag in hand as she ran after them and called back to me, “Laine is hemorrhaging. We're headed to the ER.”

My knees felt like jelly, but I ran back upstairs and woke up Ella Rae.

“Get up, Rae. Laine is bleeding.”

Immediately she was wide-awake and horror stricken. “What?”

“Get dressed,” I said. I ran to my own room to do the same. The God I didn't talk to heard plenty from me on this morning, but it was the same terrified plea over and over and over.
Please don't take her yet, please don't take her yet.

Within ten minutes Ella Rae and I were downstairs and ready to leave. Poppa Jack was waiting with his SUV running. My heart was full of love for Poppa Jack at that moment. He
didn't say a word, just took my hand, helped me into the front seat, and patted my shoulder. Then he made sure Ella Rae was secure in the back. And off we went to Shreveport at blazing speed.

Ella Rae and I said very little during the ninety-minute drive. Each of us texted and called Jack and Debra every five minutes, but we never got an answer. Poppa Jack reminded us that Jack was probably driving faster than normal and unable to respond, and Debra was surely tending to Laine. He was silent for most of the trip too. But at one point he looked at me and said, “She'll be all right. She's a fighter in her own way.”

I had never heard anyone call Laine a fighter. Quite the opposite. She was a peacemaker. A fighter? She wouldn't even take the chemo. I wondered what in the world would've made him say that. Poppa Jack was wrong, and I was scared to death of what we'd find waiting for us at the other end of this trip because Laine
wasn't
a fighter.