Read The Smiths and Joneses Online
Authors: Ira Tabankin
Twenty-one new FB pages launch all protesting the lack of the people’s ability to own a pet when they wanted to.
Talk radio in the USA is jammed with callers talking about the lack of moral right and wrong in the LSA. Some call to say Sean has sold out and should be removed from the program. A caller gets in from a prepaid cell phone calling from the LSA in New York City. He goes on a rant over the poor way the Smith family and the entire LSA is being portrayed. He accuses the media of distorting the truth. Before Glenn can respond, the caller goes on a rant about religion and how man made up God. Glenn can’t get the man to pause or even take a breath, so he cuts him off hanging up on him.
The LSA Minister of Truth decides the LSA isn’t being treated fairly, he tells his staff to call every talk radio program in the USA and bombard them with the truth about the LSA. The Minister gives his entire department the rest of the day off to make the calls. Shortly thereafter, every talk radio station in the USA is overwhelmed with over one hundred thousand calls. Web site servers crash, phone lines are jammed to the point no incoming or outgoing calls can be made to the talk radio programs.
The Minister receives permission from President Bloomberg to go on LSA National Television to make the case the USA has broken the joint agreement in the treatment of the material in the program. The Minister makes the claim the USA set up callers to call talk radio to say horrible things about the LSA. The Minister demands equal time; he demands to be allowed to call and have his call unedited and broadcast over talk radio and the USA television networks. The Presidents of the three other major networks quickly agree to give the Minister a thirty minute time slot to make his case before the people of the USA.
Wolf and CNN protest the Minister receiving a thirty minute time slot on the other stations claiming this violets the agreements signed with President Bloomberg and the two networks. Wolf and CNN quickly file a legal motion requesting a temporary restraining order to stop the broadcast of the LSA minister. The federal court in Washington, DC, agrees to hear the case on an emergency basis. The three judges listen to the lawyers from Wolf and CNN for twenty minutes. The Minister isn’t able to arrange his lawyer to attend the hearing due to how quickly the case is heard. The three-judge panel looks at a single issue which is the contract between the networks and the LSA giving the two networks the exclusive rights to the program and follow-up broadcasts for an additional thirty days. The three judges rule in favor of Wolf and CNN after taking less than an hour to review the case.
ABX, NBX and CBX rush to court to get the temporary restraining order lifted. They can’t find a federal court who will agree to quickly review and potentially reverse the existing order. The networks are given a court date in the federal appeals court 90 days later. The three agree they have to cancel their evening program with the LSA minister of Truth.
Upon hearing his thirty-minute interview is canceled and receiving an electronic copy of the restraining order, the minister decides to wait a couple of days to see how the next two episodes are received. He continues his instructions for his staff to flood USA talk radio with calls and complaints jamming their networks so no calls can be heard on the various programs.
Pet owners in twenty-two USA cities take to the streets to protest the LSA’s denial of allowing children to have pets whenever they want them. Pet owners demand the LSA overturn their law because owning a pet is something that brings love to children and teaches them responsibility. Companies that sponsor dog shows also protest the LSA’s anti-pet laws. Web forums are filled with how the LSA is pro-child sex and anti-puppy.
President Bloomberg meets in the Gray House with the Minister of True, “This isn’t going as well as we’d planned. We started off leading the ratings; then these stupid people latched on this stupid pet issue. We’re getting more bad press over the puppy issue, someone in Washington, DC, even nicknamed it the ‘puppy-gate.' I won’t have us made to look like fools over a stupid puppy. Give the damn girl a puppy and announce we may have been mistaken, we’re changing our rules on puppies.”
“Sir, are we?”
“Are we what?”
“Changing our rules?”
“Of course not, puppies are dirty; they lick themselves; they eat shit, of course, we’re not, but once the program is over no one will know we didn’t change the rules. All I want to do is get the heat off of us and change the impression about us around. Get a release out in time for this evening's news programs, place a notice on the international web to get it to the USA press. Damn them.”
“Yes sir.”
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Ron and Beverly flew 3.5 hours from Washington Dulles International airport to Dallas Fort Worth airport where they only had 35 minutes to change planes, they then flew for another 2.5 hours landing at the Las Vegas Airport. Neither had paid any attention to the news during their travels. They slept, read and listened to music. Upon landing, they were surprised to enter the terminal in the middle of a massive demonstration both against and for the LSA. Ron looked around; he put his arm around Bev saying, “I don’t like the look of this crowd, I suggest we find our bags and get out of the terminal ASAP. Don’t linger, this could turn bad any moment.”
“What are they protesting?”
“I don’t know, I see signs about something to do with puppies.”
“Please don’t tell me those idiots in the LSA are eating dogs? I’ll have to go over there and give Bloomberg a piece of my mind.”
“Give me a minute to check my phone for the news. Look at how the crowd is yelling at those carrying LSA entrance passes. It looks to me like the crowd is going to tear those poor people apart. Maybe I should help them.”
“Ron, mind your own business. You’re retired now. Whatever is going on isn’t your business.”
“I can’t allow those innocents to be harmed.”
“Look, the airport police and security people are arriving.”
As the Las Vegas police and local airport security forces arrive, the crowd turns on the newcomers thinking they're taking the LSA’s side. The crowd rushes the police and the LSA passengers who are trying to return to LAX. Fists land, carry on bags are used as weapons, the departure security gate area is being turned into a free for all fight. One of the Las Vegas police officers draws his side arm firing into the air to get everyone’s attention. The bullet goes into the ceiling knocking down a large light fixture which lands on the crowd. Blood and broken bodies are tossed everywhere
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The flying blood stops the fight in its tracks. Minutes later fifty heavily armed Las Vegas SWAT officers arrive to take control of the situation. SWAT is followed by groups of EMTs rushing to assist the injured.
Bev looks around saying, “I told you not to go over there, had you entered to the crowd you would have been right under the falling fixture. I just saved your life; you owe me now. You owe me your life.”
“Great, what now, am I your slave or something?”
“Something like that.” Bev winks and smiles, “I agree with you, let’s get our luggage and get out of here. I want to get to our hotel.”
“I’m going to call Brad and Kathy to see what they know. I don’t know if we’re going to be able to take the side trip to Disneyland if there’s trouble in the LSA.”
“Call them after we get to the hotel. I want us to get out of here ASAP.”
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President Bloomberg places a call to Wolf, “Wolf; I’m disappointed in you. I thought you, of out of all of our reporters, could handle a simple interview. How the hell did you allow the discussion to get so far off track? Why the hell did you allow that brat to go prattling on about the dog issue? Didn’t we have the discussion about no pet conversations before we agreed to the program format? I warned you pets, and puppies evoke strong emotions. Emotions I don’t want turned against us. I expect you to turn the tables before this gets out of control. The USA and rest of the world was shocked over our policy about joint restrooms and showers but once the puppy issue hit home, it took center stage. I can’t believe how crazy people are over a stupid dog.”
“Mr. President, many people consider their dogs as members of their family. They don’t see them as animals.”
“Wolf don’t get mushy on me, dogs, cats they’re animals, nothing more. Hell in China they eat them. I want you to get public attitude changed right away. We were leading in the ratings. Fix it.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll start turning Sissy into a superstar.”
“Who the hell is Sissy?”
“Mr. President, she’s the youngest child of the Smith family.”
“Yes, the one who wants the puppy. I like your idea of turning her into a superstar she won’t be able to say a bad word about us.”
“Mr. President, please remember she’s only a child of 7. We’ll have to guide her.”
“Send one of your special advisors to coach her, give her a puppy and let her know what happens to the puppy if she blows it. I want her to be a bigger star then Beth. Make it happen.”
“Yes sir, I understand.”
“Wolf don’t fail me on this.”
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The world isn’t sure what to think about the direction the LSA has taken. Millions protest against the LSA due to their stand against organized religion; millions protest the LSA over what they consider child abuse. On the other hand, the LGBT block is solidly behind the LSA. They protest against the USA and for the LSA. They applaud the forward thinking of the LSA in recognizing everyone is equal and deserves to be treated the same. Overall the largest supporters of the LSA have turned out to be teenage boys who are supporting the LSA 7 to 1 over the USA.
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President Rund calls Sean, “Sean, I know I said I wouldn’t interfere in the program, however, the support for the LSA over us is growing too quickly. I was happy to see Beth steal everyone’s heart. I was happy to hear the Smith’s be honest about some aspects of their lives. I didn’t count on the LSA scoring so strongly with millions. I’m asking you to find a way to keep Beth and Leon in the spotlight, show our values in the best light, discuss the potential damage the LSA is causing to their children. If too many of our people think the LSA has the better answer, they will push us to change, or they will move to the LSA. We can’t afford to lose many talented people.”
“Sir, I understand.”
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The fourth night of the program looks to break every record. The early count of viewers tuned in to watch the program exceeds 276 million households in the USA/LSA. The rest of the world is also drawn to the program causing some broadcasters to give up even trying for any ratings on the nights the program is going to run.
Chapter 11
Half of the USA and the eastern section of the LSA are being pounded by massive thunderstorms. Winds reach 65MPH in New York City. Golf ball sized hail blankets a third of New York City and northern New Jersey. Newly elected New York City mayor, Rose Menenz, goes on television to announce the freak storm is due to the worsening effects of global warming. She asks everyone in New York City to continue their efforts at reducing dangerous emissions of carbon dioxide. She orders all non-electric cars, of which there are less than 10,000 left in the city, to cease operations. She orders all air conditioners that haven’t been converted to the new, and much less efficient cooling chemicals, to be turned off. She orders the reduction of steam released from electrical plants. She goes on to announce that due to the global warming crisis, she is ordering the electrical plants to be turned off for four hours a day. During these four hours, the city will experience brown outs and black outs. She explains that while inconvenient, emergency action is required to stem global warming.
President Bloomberg reviews the comments made by Mayor Menenz and agrees time is of the essence. He orders similar actions across the rest of the LSA in the name of reducing global warming.
Upon hearing of the actions by Mayor Menenz and President Bloomberg, USA President Paul announces he’s going to issue an executive order expanding the offshore areas that can be developed for oil and gas exploration. He tells his staff. “Menenz and Bloomberg are crazy; the temperatures haven’t risen in the previous twenty years. They’re using a single storm to push their political bullshit about global warming. I suggest we do everything we can to prove them wrong. They’ll have brown outs and black outs, we’ll cut taxes on electrical generating plants lowering the cost of electrical service for the USA’s citizens. Our economy will grow while theirs fails from a lack of power.” President Paul smiles thinking he’s really going to be sticking it to President Bloomberg and the LSA. The LSA declares global warming is speeding up, the USA announces that the planet is cooling off. President Paul decides to ask Sean to sneak global warming into the next episode, sure that he’ll be able to confuse the LSA citizens.
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President Bloomberg issues a press release stating, “The LSA never intended to deprive our children of the joy that owning a pet brings. Owning and caring for a pet helps our children become more responsible. Children with pets learn how to care for others quicker, they learn how to teach and take care of others. The USA may have misunderstood our laws. We didn’t outright forbid pets. The USA press took a simple rule completely out of context so they could throw mud on the LSA. Since the LSA recognizes everyone as equal, we have always allowed anyone who wants to own a pet to acquire one with the following provisions, any pet has to be neutered, we don’t want to have unapproved breeding that could overrun our environment. Second, all pets must have state-approved health insurance; we don’t want pets to get sick and not be able to get well-deserved treatment. We’ve provided health insurance for everyone in the LSA, and we’re happy to report we’re expanding our national health insurance to cover all of our pets. Lastly, no pet shall be purchased and turned loose into the wild. This is a hard and fast rule. Anyone who releases an animal will be caught. All pets will have an embedded RFID chip under their skin that contains their owner’s information. If a pet is injured, released into the wild or abused, we’ll know who did it. These new rules will go into effect at midnight tonight.”