The Stalker Chronicles (18 page)

Authors: Electa Rome Parks

Tags: #Fiction, #Suspense, #Thrillers, #Crime, #Urban Life, #African American

BOOK: The Stalker Chronicles

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“Please, Pilar.”

“Please, Pilar. Please, Pilar,” I mocked. “Is that all you can say? You make me sick. I hate your ass so much, Xavier. Oooh, you just don't know.”

“Let him go,” he said quietly.

“Did the love of your miserable life tell you what happened to her?”

“Huh?”

“Oh, I have your full attention now. Mention that fucking bitch Kendall, and I finally get your full attention, huh? Well, poor baby got to experience thug love. From what I understand, she was pretty wet for my boy. He had her wide open, literally. Maybe she likes those roughnecks behind closed doors, though, because she's too much of a stuck-up snob to be seen in public with one. You think?”

“You fucking bitch.”

“I've been called worse. Your cute little assistant, she's a scared little thing. I enjoyed messing with her. Oh, by the way, I love the improvements you've made to your home, but your security system sucks,” I said, blindly stroking Dre's cheek.

“Why, I'llâ”

“Do absolutely nothing but stand there like the little bitch you are,” I said, putting the blade to Dre's chin. “Don't make me go there, because you know I will.”

He calmed down.

“That's what I thought. You ain't going to do nothing. Not a damn thing, but stand there like the punk you are. You lame-ass, womanizing piece of shit.”

“Pilar, this isn't going to change a damn thing. You and I will never be together. I don't love you. I never have and never will. I don't want you. In fact, I don't even like you. It's taking all I have not to puke in your face. You're pathetic and disgusting. Now what?”

With those words, something inside of me burst loose like a raging dam. I snapped. It was like everything my mother had said to me over the years came rushing forth. I was sick and tired of being insulted, spoken down to, and abused.

I lunged for Xavier, with the blade aimed straight for his heart. I wanted to cut it out, stomp on it, and shred it to pieces, since he never used it, anyway. However, I managed only to cut his face. Droplets of blood spilled forth. Initially, I had an element of surprise when I lunged for him, but that was very short-lived. We wrestled around the room, knocking over anything that crossed our path. I developed superhuman strength, running on adrenaline, and I somehow managed to hold on to the knife. I knew if Xavier took it away from me, it was over. Everything.

Xavier dipped, dived, and rolled as I cursed, swinging the blade back and forth in a frenzied motion as I attempted to back him into a corner. I wanted to cut his balls off and stuff them in his lying mouth. Make him gag on them.

“I'll show you,” I screamed. “I hate you. I hate you. I hate you so much.”

I was now alternating between screaming and crying. It took a few minutes to realize tears were streaming down my face. I thought I was all cried out over him.

“I guess I showed your ex, huh?” I laughed in his face. “Stuck-up, bourgeois bitch got exactly what she deserved. My only regret was that I wasn't there to bear witness.”

With those words, Xavier lunged at me, and we ended up on the bed, near where Dre' lay. We were fighting as if our lives depended upon it, and I guess they did. I was screaming, kicking, scratching, fighting for my life like an alley cat backed in a corner.

“You are not going to keep coming into my life and hurting the ones I love. This is going to stop today,” Xavier screamed as he punched me in the face. “Do you hear me? This shit ends now.”

To avoid his hits, I turned my head several times and was staring directly at Dre'. His eyes spoke of everything he couldn't say verbally. I saw pain, regret, betrayal, and just a glimpse of love. That was the last thing I remembered before my world went black. I glimpsed love. Xavier sent a right clip to my jawline, and it was lights out. Everything went black.

Chapter 39

Dre'

Life is a bitch! But I was a survivor. It had been six months since that tragic day, a day I would never forget as long as I lived.

Speaking of living, most of my doctors called me the miracle man. It was a true miracle I survived to tell my story. I guess as they say, it just wasn't my time. I was still here for a reason, a purpose yet to be revealed to me. However, I guess that was all in God's time.

I would never be the same. There would be no going back. Besides the emotional trauma, I would have long-term medical problems that would remain with me until the day I died. I just took one day at a time. That was all I could manage right now.

Xavier and I were still thicker than thieves. Hell, he basically saved my life. But ... There was always the “elephant” in the room with us now, mainly Pilar, or Milan, as I would always remember her. We didn't discuss her, or at least we tried not to. Yet she was always with us. She was this unspeakable, invisible, intangible being that hovered around and made its presence known.

Of course, the story broke, and there was a huge media frenzy, possibly as big as before. However, this time I was brought into the mix. All our lives were dissected for the nation to see and inspect. People took sides. It was ugly. As with any news, we soon became old news. Our story finally died down, and life gradually returned to normal. Well, as normal as it would ever be. My life was forever changed.

As much as our bond had strengthened, the elephant in the room somehow separated Xavier and me. I didn't know if the rift would ever be mended. I only hoped our friendship and history together would help us survive the aftermath of the storm.

You see, I didn't blame Milan/Pilar. My feelings were the same. I loved her. I realized most people found that very hard to believe and digest after all she had done to me, but I did. I loved Milan, and I understood she was very sick. I understood how she became what she was. I empathized with her needs and what frightened and pushed her buttons.

Many people didn't agree, some called me crazy, and others would never understand. That was fine. I tried not to sweat the small stuff now. I had been to the valley of the shadow of death, and I had survived. The public saw the media clips and believed what they saw and read. They thought Pilar was simply a monster. Her disease was the monster.

In the beginning, I saw a side of her that was capable of love. I saw her vulnerable, and she shared some of her secrets with me. Even though she attempted to hurt Xavier through me, I still felt that somewhere deep, deep inside, she cared for me. I knew what I felt.

I forgave her. I supported her. And I continued to love her. I only hoped Xavier would, in time, come to understand.

Chapter 40

Xavier

It had been six long months since that tragic day. For me, it had been dÃ©jÃ vu all over again, and the media had had another field day, with our photos and backstory splashed all over the place. We couldn't get away from them. They had literally camped out in front of my home in order to get a photo or quote. I had never understood America's fascination with tragedy and drama. But then again, that was what I wrote about. However, I wrote mostly fiction, but living through the real deal wasn't quite as entertaining.

I wrote, wrote, and wrote to cleanse my soul. It felt good to purge my feelings. Writing had literally become my salvation. Plus, I was seeing a therapist now. There were days I thought I was going to lose my mind; I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, and I couldn't function. All I wanted to do was hurt someone, mainly Pilar. It scared me that I hated another human being so much, and I hated myself because I had allowed her to reenter my life and almost destroy people I cared about. I still blamed myself for bringing her into their lives. They didn't deserve any of this.

I would never forget, as long as I lived, the sight of her hovering over Dre' like a wild predator ready to pounce and devour its prey. When I did sleep for a few hours, that was one of the haunting images I always saw and relived. As much as I hated to admit it, Pilar and I were connected for life. Every time I looked in the mirror at the small scar on my cheek, I was reminded of her. Of what she did to me. Of how she changed my life.

Dre' would never be the same. He had a few lingering ailments from the poisoning. Every time I looked at him, I felt guilt. He and I had many issues to address that we didn't speak of right now. Yet I needed him just as much as he needed me. We were much like survivors of a war; we had our war stories and scars, and that bonded us in ways no one could ever understand. We had walked through the fire and survived. I wished I could say unscathed; however, life was usually not that accommodating.

I didn't and couldn't understand some of Dre's decisions regarding her, so we didn't discuss her. I just knew I loved him like a brother, and we'd get past this, too. It was just another life problem we had to get through, and it wasn't going to be a walk in the park this time. I tried to pretend Pilar was simply a figment of my imagination, but she showed up in my nightmares.

Every week, like clockwork, they arrived. I received a letter from her. Sometimes they were long; sometimes short; sometimes frantic, almost illegible. They all had a common theme: Pilar's undying love for me. I finally gave up trying to stop them from coming. She always managed to manipulate someone to smuggle them out and mail them for her.

She scared me. I could honestly admit that. I only prayedâwhich was something I was doing a lot of latelyâshe would remain locked up for the rest of her natural life. I knew with certainty that that was the only way she would get the help she needed and I'd have a normal life, free of her. Regrets? Yeah, I had many. For the first time, I was thinking about woulda, coulda, shoulda. Now it was too late. It took only one person to change your life forever. Sometimes they came with a big butt and a smile.

Chapter 41

Pilar

They couldn't keep me locked up forever. Sooner or later, I would get out. I was very patient.

I was also smart. I always had been. I knew what they liked to hear; it was not too hard to figure out. I had always known how to play the game, and fortunately for me, I knew how to manipulate people. So, I smiled sweetly and told them what they wanted to hear.

Yes, Doctor, I understand why I became obsessed with Xavier. Yes, I understand how my childhood affected my image of myself and relationships in general. Yes, I now understand that he doesn't love me and I can't be with him.

Leeda was my ally and looked out for me. We shared the same city now, and she even paid my expenses for the best treatment possible. Dre' visited at least once a month. He was sweet, much like a new puppy.

Was I sorry about the people I hurt? Not really. We were all indispensable when it came down to it. Growing up, no one ever saved me or showed me any mercy. So why should I? Xavier, I saw him on TV, and he looked good. He was wearing a beard. Probably to hide the scar. He should realize he could try to hide it, but it was still just below the surface, a permanent part of him. My mark. Masking it didn't get rid of it. I felt that he had finally learned the lesson this time around. I gave him an A+. So maybe, just maybe, there was hope for us, after all. No one said that life was easy. Even soul mates had to go through their difficult times, too. Wasn't it Oprah who said we had to turn our wounds into wisdom?

I took out a pen and a sheet of lined notebook paper, both smuggled in by staff for a small fee. I hated that the paper couldn't be nice, expensive stationery, but I had learned long ago to deal with what was thrown my way.

I wrote:

Dear Xavier,

Someday we will be together. I promise you that, babe. No one and no circumstances can keep us apart. You know that now. Don't you? We were meant to be together; we've been together in other lifetimes. And I've loved you every single time with just as much passion.

I would die for you, babe. I would literally lay down my life to be with you.

With all my love,
Pilar

I smiled sweetly as I placed the note in the plain envelope addressed to Xavier Preston and planted a sweet kiss on it.

Questions for Discussion

1.
What are your thoughts on the way Xavier treated the women in his life?

2.
What do you think of Bailey and Kendall?

3.
Where do you think Xavier's rules stemmed from? Were they effective?

4.
At the beginning of the novel, was Xavier acting paranoid regarding Pilar?

5.
Would surviving a traumatic experience, such as stalking, affect the way a person deals with other people?

6.
Was Xavier somewhat jealous of the relationship Dre' and Milan shared?

7.
Was Dre' really in love with Milan? If so, why?

8.
At some point, should Dre' have been suspicious of who Milan really was?