The Sunset Limited: A Novel in Dramatic Form (4 page)

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Authors: Cormac McCarthy

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Black
   
Oh I’d thought of it that way.
White
   
And?
Black
   
And what?
White
   
Isnt that the real story?
Black
   
Well. I dont want to get on the wrong side of you. You seem to have a powerful wish for that to be the real story. So I will say that that is certainly one way to look at it. I got to concede that. I got to keep you interested.
White
   
String me along.
Black
   
That okay with you?
White
   
And then put me in the what was it? The trick bag?
Black
   
Yeah.
White
   
Right.
Black
   
You got to remember this is a jailhouse story.
White
   
All right.
Black
   
Which you specifically asked for.
White
   
All right.
Black
   
The point is, Professor, that I aint got the first notion in the world about what makes God tick. I dont know why he spoke to me. I wouldnt of.
White
   
But you listened.
Black
   
Well what choice would you have?
White
   
I dont know. Not listen?
Black
   
How you goin to do that?
White
   
Just dont listen.
Black
   
Do you think he goes around talkin to people that he knows aint goin to listen in the first place? You think he’s got that kind of free time?
White
   
I see your point.
Black
   
If he didnt know I was ready to listen he wouldnt of said a word.
White
   
He’s an opportunist.
Black
   
Meanin I guess that he seen somebody in a place low enough to where he ought to be ready to take a pretty big step.
White
   
Something like that.
Black
   
And you think that maybe I think that you might be in somethin like that kind of a place you own self.
White
   
Could be.
Black
   
Well I can dig that. I can dig it. Of course they is one small problem.
White
   
And that is.
Black
   
I aint God.
White
   
I’m glad to hear you say that.
Black
   
It come as a relief to me too.
White
   
Did you used to think you were God?
Black
   
No. I didnt. I didnt know what I was. But I thought I was in charge. I never knowed what that burden weighed till I put it down. That might of been the sweetest thing of all. To just hand over the keys.
White
   
Let me ask you something.
Black
   
Ask it.
White
   
Why cant you people just accept it that some people dont even
want
to believe in God.
Black
   
I accept that.
White
   
You do?
Black
   
Sure I do. Meanin that I believe it to be a fact. I’m lookin at it ever day. I better accept it.
White
   
Then why cant you leave us alone?
Black
   
To do your own thing.
White
   
Yes.
Black
   
Hangin from them steampipes and all.
White
   
If that’s what we want to do, yes.
Black
   
Cause he said not to. It’s in here.
(Holding up the book)

The professor shakes his head.

Black
   
I guess you dont want to be happy.
White
   
Happy?
Black
   
Yeah. What’s wrong with happy?
White
   
God help us.
Black
   
What. We done opened a can of worms here? What you got against bein happy?
White
   
It’s contrary to the human condition.
Black.
   
Well. It’s contrary to your condition. I got to agree with that.
White
   
Happy. This is ridiculous.
Black
   
Like they aint no such a thing.
White
   
No.
Black
   
Not for nobody.
White
   
No.
Black
   
Mm. How’d we get in such a fix as this?
White
   
We were born in such a fix as this. Suffering and human destiny are the same thing. Each is a description of the other.
Black
   
We aint talkin about sufferin. We talkin about bein happy.
White
   
Well you cant be happy if you’re in pain.
Black
   
Why not?
White
   
You’re not making any sense.
The black falls back clutching his chest.
Black
   
Oh them is some hard words from the professor. The preacher has fell back. He’s clutchin his heart. Eyes is rolled back in his head. Wait a minute. Wait a minute folks. His eyes is blinkin. I think he’s comin back. I think he’s comin back.
The black sits up and leans forward.
Black
   
The point, Professor, is that if you didnt have no pain in your life then how would you even know you
was
happy? As compared to what?
White
   
You dont have anything to drink around here do you?
Black
   
No, Professor, I aint. You a drinkin man?
White
   
Are we about to get a temperance lecture?
Black
   
Not from me.
White
   
It’s been a difficult day. I take it you dont drink.
Black
   
I dont. I have done my share of it in my time.
White
   
Are you in AA?
Black
   
No. No AA. I just quit. I’ve had a lots of friends was drinkers. Most of em, for that matter. Most of em dead, too.
White
   
From drinking.
Black
   
Well. From drinkin or from reasons that dont get too far from drinkin. Not too long ago I had a friend to get run down by a taxicab. Now where do you reckon he was goin? Drunk.
White
   
I dont know. Where was he going?
Black
   
Goin after more whiskey. Had plenty at the house. But a drunk is always afraid of runnin out.
White
   
Was he killed?
Black
   
I hope so. We buried him.
White
   
I suppose there’s a moral to this story.
Black
   
Well, it’s just a story about what you want and what you get. Pain and happiness. I’ll tell you another one.
White
   
All right.
Black
   
One Sunday they’s a bunch of us settin around at my house drinkin. Sunday mornin. Favorite time for drunks to get together and drink and I’ll let you think about why that might be so. Well here come one of my buddies with this girl. Evelyn. And Evelyn was drunk when she got there but we fixed her a drink and directly Redge—my buddy—he goes back in the kitchen to get him a drink only now the bottle’s gone. Well, Redge has been around a few drinkin people in his time so he commences to hunt for the bottle. Looks in all the cabinets and behind everthing. He cant find it but of course he knows what’s happened to it so he comes back in and he sets down and he looks at Miss Evelyn settin there on the sofa. Drunk as a goat. And he says: Evelyn, where’s the whiskey? And Evelyn, she goes: Ah ghaga baba lala ghaga. And he says: Evelyn, where did you put the
whiskey? Ah lala bloggle blabla. And Redge is settin there and this is beginnin to piss him off just a little and he gets in her face and he goes: Ah loddle loddle blabble ghaga blabla and she says I hid it in the toilet.
White
   
That’s pretty funny
Black
   
I thought you might like that.
White
   
And is that where the whiskey was?
Black
   
Oh yeah. That’s a favorite place for drunks to hide a bottle. But the point of course is that the drunk’s concern aint that he’s goin to die from drinkin—which he is. It’s that he’s goin to run out of whiskey fore he gets a chance to do it. Are you hungry? I can come back to this. I aint goin to lose my place.
White
   
I’m all right. Go ahead.
Black
   
If you was to hand a drunk a drink and tell him he really dont want it what do you reckon he’d say?
White
   
I think I know what he’d say.
Black
   
Sure you do. But you’d still be right.
White
   
About him not really wanting it.
Black
   
Yes. Because what he really wants he cant get. Or he thinks he cant get it. So what he really dont want he cant get enough of.
White
   
So what is it that he really wants.
Black
   
You know what he really wants.
White
   
No I dont.
Black
   
Yeah you do.
White
   
No I dont.
Black
   
Hm.
White
   
Hm what.
Black
   
You a hard case, Professor.
White
   
You’re not exactly a day at the beach yourself.
Black
   
You dont know what he wants.
White
   
No. I do not.
Black
   
He wants what everbody wants.
White
   
And that is?
Black
   
He wants to be loved by God.
White
   
I dont want to be loved by God.
Black
   
I love that. See how you cut right to it? He dont either. Accordin to him. He just wants a drink of whiskey. You a smart man, Professor. You tell me which one makes sense and which one dont.
White
   
I dont want a drink of whiskey, either.
Black
   
I thought you just got done askin for one?
White
   
I mean as a general proposition.
Black
   
We aint talkin about no general propositions. We talkin about a drink.
White
   
I dont have a drinking problem.
Black
   
Well you got some kind of a problem.
White
   
Well whatever kind of a problem I have it’s not something that I imagine can be addressed with a drink of liquor.
Black
   
Mm. I love the way you put that. So what can it be addressed with?
White
   
I think you know what it can be addressed with.
Black
   
The Sunset Limited.
White
   
Yes.
Black
   
And that’s what you want.
White
   
That’s what I want. Yes.
Black
   
That’s a mighty big drink of whiskey, Professor.
White
   
That I dont really want.
Black
   
That you dont really want. Yes.
White
   
Well. I think I do want it.
Black
   
Of course you do, honey. If you didnt we wouldnt be settin here.
White
   
Well. I disagree with you.
Black
   
That’s all right. That’s the hand I’m playin.
White
   
I dont think you understand that people such as myself see a yearning for God as something lacking in those people.
Black
   
I do understand that. Couldnt agree more.
White
   
You agree with that?
Black
   
Sure I do. What’s lackin is God.
White
   
Well, as I say, we’ll just have to disagree.
Black
   
You aint closin down the forum for discussion are you?
White
   
Not at this juncture.
Black
   
Cause I had a little more to say.
White
   
How did I know that?
Black
   
I did go to one or two AA meetins. Lot of folks didnt like the God part of it all that much but I hadnt set there too long fore I figured out that the God part was really all the part they was. The problem wasnt that they was too much God in AA it was that they wasnt enough. And I got a pretty thick head about some things but I finally figured out that what was true about AA was probably true about a lot of other things too.
White
   
Well I’m sorry, but to me the whole idea of God is just a load of crap.
The black puts his hand to his chest and leans back.

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