The Ten Year Affair (15 page)

“Peter...Chester.” Ian nodded at both gentlemen. “How is she?”

Peter couldn’t contain his anger.

“You son-of-a-bitch! As though you really care Foster. Don’t you realize
that you’re the reason she’s in here? Of course not. You’re too damn blind to
see what you’ve done to her. You...”

Chester interrupted.

“Peter that’s enough. That’s exactly what Alex doesn’t need right now.”

“I’m sorry Chester. You’re right.”

Peter glared at Ian and stomped down the hall to one of the vending
machines, placed some quarters in it for a soda and gave it a huge bang when it
failed to give him his soda. Julia was just leaving Alex’s room and joined Chester at his side.

Julia gave Ian the same kind of angry glare he’d received from Peter. He
was definitely not feeling welcome.

“Foster, I want you to know that I’m very upset with Chester’s decision
to call you but for reasons I don’t understand she wants to see you. I’ll be
right outside that door and if you upset her even the slightest you’ll be out
of here on your ear!”

Ian bristled at the anger in her voice.

“Julia I have no intention of upsetting Alex. You have my word.”

“Your word doesn’t comfort me at all Foster. Not one bit. Don’t be long.
She needs some rest. She’s had a trying morning.”

Ian took a big breath before opening the door to Alex’s room. He didn’t
know what kind of welcome to expect from her, especially after their
conversation yesterday. Alex was lying on her back with her eyes shut and she
appeared to be sleeping. Well, he’d just wait until she woke up. Her golden
hair was slightly disheveled and he could see the dark circles under her eyes.
Her face was flushed and her lips were slightly parted. She was beautiful. He
approached the bed quietly and stood over her just watching her sleep. How was
he suppose to live without her? Was he crazy to think he could?

Ian lifted his right hand to smooth some stray hairs away from her face.
He couldn’t resist entangling his hand in her hair and gently kissed the top of
her head. He felt her stir and was sorry he’d disturbed her but he just had to
touch her. He always had a need to touch or caress her. Even when they were
together in public. Holding her hand or an arm around her waist. A quick brush
of her cheek. He smiled as he remembered her telling him to never stop touching
her. That she loved his caresses outside of the bedroom as much as inside.

She stirred again.

“Ian?”

He smiled and rubbed his knuckles up and down her cheek. He reminded
himself that she wanted to see him. She would not ask him to leave.

“It’s me baby. I’m here.” She finally opened her eyes.

“I’m glad you’re here Ian. I need you here.” She raised her arms and
wound them around his neck and she couldn’t hold back her tears.

“I didn’t mean what I said yesterday Ian. I’m so sorry. I would never
keep you from your baby Ian. You know that. I couldn’t. Please forgive me.”

Ian held her tight and reveled in the warmth of her body against his. Did
he really think he could live without ever feeling her body molded to his?

“Forgive you? Alex there’s nothing to forgive you for. I know you were
hurt and I deserved everything you said.”

They continued to hold each other as though they’d never let go. Alex
couldn’t believe he was here after all the terrible things she had said
yesterday. She had needed him to come so badly but was afraid to ask him to.
She was grateful to her grandfather for his insight.

“Oh, Ian. I was so scared. If I’d lost our baby...”

“Shhhhh. Baby. Let’s not talk about it. You’re okay and our baby’s okay.”

He sat on the bed and drew back some so he could see her face and place
his right hand protectively on her swollen belly yet still hold her in his
arms.

“It was just a little scare and we’re going to do everything we need to
so nothing like this happens again. I spoke to your grandparents and they say
we need to eliminate the stress from your life and I know I’ve been a big part
of that stress. But I won’t be any more Alex, I promise.”

Ian bent his head to press a feathery kiss across Alex’s lips.

“Oh this is not smart Alex. Not smart at all. But it’s what you want.
What you need,”
Alex thought.

Ian was a little hesitant. He didn’t want to push Alex or anger her but
he’d wanted to taste those lips from the minute he’d walked in the room. Ian
touched her lips softly afraid to ask for more but as he went to draw away Alex
grabbed the nape of his neck with one hand and framed his cheek with the other
and pulled him back down to her mouth. She urged his lips apart with her tongue.
She was gloriously wet and warm and god how he’d missed what she did to him
with that mouth, that tongue. As their tongues tangled and they took the kiss
deeper and deeper it suddenly hit Ian. He might have lost her. He might have
lost their baby. The fear finally emerged. Dear god he’d almost lost the two
most important people in his life! He couldn’t fight the emotions welling up
inside of him and he didn’t want to. Without realizing it his kiss was no
longer gentle. He couldn’t get enough. He needed to be deeper inside her, he
needed to be closer. His kiss became rougher and rougher as he tried to get
closer.

“Ian? Stop Ian.” Alex tried to shove him away and get him to look at her.

“Ian what’s wrong?” Alex could tell by the urgency in Ian’s kiss that something
had happened. Though she loved Ian’s kisses no matter how gentle or rough she
knew something was wrong.

“Ian stop and look at me!”

Ian reluctantly raised his face to look in her eyes and she saw his
tears. She framed his face with her hands then gently lifted one hand to wipe
the tears from his cheeks. She didn’t understand the tears. She had never seen Ian
Foster cry. She never knew he was capable of such emotion.

 Ian collapsed in her arms, burying his face in her neck as his tears
gently fell down his face.

“Baby you scared me so much. I’ve never been so scared in my whole life.
To think that we might have lost our baby. That I could have lost you. My heart
nearly stopped when I got Chester’s call. Please baby don’t scare me like this
again. Please.”

Alex didn’t know what to say so she just held him close as he cried. She
was so touched by the depth of his feelings. He definitely was not the bastard she
had made him out to be yesterday. He was the good, caring man she knew he was.
She didn’t want to give him up but unless he changed and got his priorities in
the right order, she would have to give him up for the sake of their baby. She
didn’t want their child being hurt by his absences the way he’d hurt her so
often.

Out in the waiting area Julia was pacing and driving Chester and Peter
crazy.

“He’s been in there awfully long Chester. I’m afraid he’s upsetting her.
I should go check on them.”

“For gods sake Julia please do!” Chester pleaded. “You’re driving us
crazy with your pacing!”

Julia cast her husband a haughty glare and her mind made up; she went to
Alex’s door and peeked inside. She was startled at what she saw. Ian Foster was
sobbing like a tiny baby in Alex’s arms and she was comforting him! It was just
like Foster to turn the tables and make this all about him. As she was about to
tell him it was time to go he spoke.

“Baby you scared me so much. To think that we might have lost our baby.
That I could have lost you...”

Julia suddenly felt guilty for her eavesdropping and closed the door. She
was shocked. She had never seen such a sensitive side of Ian. He was actually
sobbing. It was obvious that he had deep feelings for Alex and the baby so why
was he fighting it? Why did he keep breaking her baby’s heart? She didn't want
to see the sensitive side of Ian Foster. She didn’t want to like him. Not one
bit.

Julia returned to Chester and Peter.

“I think we need to go now. They might have lost their child today and
they need some privacy. They don’t need to feel that we might barge in on them
at any time.”

“But Julia...”

“Please Chester I don’t want to explain. We’ll call her room on the way
home and tell her we’ve left. Peter dear you need to leave as well.”

Chester and Peter looked at each other in astonishment. Peter was
furious. That son-of-a-bitch was with her now and Peter had not gotten to see
her yet. Didn’t anyone understand that
he
was the one who loved Alex so
much it hurt? Chester and Peter were both shocked at Julia’s change of heart
but they both knew better than to argue with her and they trusted her judgment.

“Let’s go gentleman,” Julia stated and started towards the elevator. Both
men looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and followed her out.

Alex was presently being tucked into bed in her room at her grandparent’s
house by her grandmother and she felt like she was ten years old again. While
she was still worried about carrying her baby to term she felt strangely at
peace. Ian had spent the entire day and night with her at the hospital never
leaving her side. They had talked about their relationship and come to an
understanding that while Ian cared for her deeply, he didn’t feel that he could
ever be the kind of husband or father she and the baby needed and deserved. It
hadn’t been what she wanted to hear but it was time she grew up and accepted
the way things were.

Ian had driven her from the hospital to her grandparents and been efficiently
shooed away by her grandmother.  She smiled as she remembered her grandmother’s
words to Ian.

“You look like hell young man. You need to go home and get some sleep and
clean yourself up. She’s not going anywhere. She’ll be right here in this bed
when you get back. Don’t you have an important job that needs your attention?”

That had been Grandmother’s way of telling Ian he was welcome to come
back. Probably that he
better
come back to see Alex. Alex could tell
that grandmother had softened towards Ian and she was curious as to why.

Julia finished tucking Alex in and sat on the edge of the bed.

“What are you grinning about young lady? Don’t make fun of me simply
because I like to fuss over my grandchild.”

“Actually Grandmother I was thinking about how you’ve been treating Ian
since this whole incident. You actually seem to be acting civilly towards him.
I’m curious as to what prompted the change of heart.”

“Change of heart? There’s been no change of heart with me as far as Ian
Foster is concerned and I don’t know what could have possibly given you that
idea. I still think he is an irresponsible rogue but he is going to be the
father of your child and there’s nothing I can do to change that. I will
invariably cross his path often so I might as well learn to tolerate him.”

“I appreciate that Grandmother. You’re right. You will see Ian often
because it’s important to me that he be a part of his child’s life and if I am
going to be living here with you for some time he’ll be around a lot.
Especially once our baby’s born.”

Julia was afraid of upsetting Alex but she felt that now was a good time
to broach the subject of exactly what Ian and Alex’s plans were for the future.

“Alexandra dear. Have you and Ian discussed marriage?”

Alex knew her Grandmother would ask sooner or later. Everyone would ask
sooner or later.

“Yes Grandmother we’ve discussed marriage and come to the conclusion it’s
not for us...”

“But Alex...”

“Please Grandmother let me finish. I love Ian with all my heart. I think
I’ve loved him since we were five years old but Grandmother he simply doesn’t
love me.”

“Poppy cock Alexandra! No man cries for a woman he doesn’t love!” Alex
cocked her head and looked at Julia questioningly. Julia’s face showed the
guilt she had felt upon witnessing the touching scene between Alex and Ian and
her cheeks flushed pink.

“I’m sorry darling. I came to your room yesterday to tell Ian it was time
for him to go because I was sure he was upsetting you. I left as soon as I saw
what was happening. That man loves you Alexandra whether he admits it with
words or not.”

“Well, Grandmother that is what I’d like to think too but what is
important to Ian right now is his career and he doesn’t have time for a family.
His job is very demanding and once he takes over for John Marshall as County Prosecutor he’ll have even less time for a relationship let alone a family. But he
is committed to our child and will do whatever he can to spend time with his
son or daughter. I have to respect that Ian’s just not ready to settle down. So
I need to get on with my life and accept the fact that Ian will only be a very
small part of that life and certainly not in the role I’d envisioned for him.
It makes me very sad Grandmother and believe me, I’m not through shedding tears
over it yet. I don’t know that I’ll ever be.”

“I knew the first time I set eyes on that boy he would be nothing but
heartache for you dear. I knew that anyone who seemed that perfect had to have
flaws somewhere. I only wish things could have worked out differently. Maybe
they will yet.”

“Grandmother did you know that Peter has offered to marry me?”

Julia wasn’t shocked. That was just like Peter to run to Alex’s rescue.
Peter was a good, decent man who truly loved Alex and was not afraid to show it
even though Alex had rebuffed his love for so long.

“Alexandra you know how I feel about Peter. I’ve wished for a marriage
between you two for some time now. Are you considering his offer?”

“Yes I am but I don’t intend to make a decision until after the baby is
born. I know that Peter will be the perfect husband Grandmother but I don’t
know if that will be enough for me. Do you think I could learn to love him
Grandmother if we were married? Maybe if we were married it would be like
finally giving Ian up and I would work harder at loving Peter.” Alex sighed. “I
just don’t know. Peter deserves someone who truly cares only for him. Ian will
always be between us.”