The Waitress (17 page)

‘Crichton Brown’s. That’s our surnames, my partner and me, and it’s all going to be re-painted coffee and cream. Soothing yet trendy, fresh yet warm, smart yet casual. The menu will have organic everything, rice milk, soya milk, you-name-it milk, wholemeal, unrefined flour in the pastry and quinoa in the salads.’

‘What?’ asked Matt.

‘Salads,’ said Katie.

‘What will we give people who want stuff that tastes nice?’ asked Sukie.

‘I think it’s brilliant!’ said Katie excitedly, trying not to bounce.

‘And here’s the best part,’ said Paul, ‘you’ve all got
two
weeks’ paid leave – yes, paid – while we totally refurbish.’

There was a pause.

‘Don’t all cheer at once.’

‘But what will the commuters do during those two weeks?’ asked Katie.

He shrugged. ‘I’m sure they can cope for a fortnight.’

‘No no no!’ said Katie. ‘They might cope for one week. For two weeks they’ll settle into a new routine and never come back.’

Sukie nodded. ‘And then Crichton Brown’s would be a bit trendy yet empty.’

‘How about we just do coffee,’ suggested Katie quickly, ‘while the rest of the place is being done up? All you’d need is the coffee machine, milk, coffee, paper cups, and one of us, of course, to make the coffees and serve the regulars. I’ll do it. Then I can work with you on the new menu ideas at the same time.’

‘Right,’ said Sukie. ‘I’m glad that’s all been decided then. Well done Paul. You’re doing a cracking job.’

Paul swallowed. His mobile rang. He turned away and whispered frantically into it, the shirt on his back a darker colour due to sweat. All Katie heard was ‘already a fucking coup’ before he rang off. He turned back round and gave them another smile.

‘That was my partner and the new chef. They’re just parking. Traffic’s been lousy apparently.’

‘It always is this time of day,’ said Sukie.

‘Right.’

They heard a high-pitched voice from the café.

‘I think the toaster’s broken!’

‘Ah,’ said Paul. ‘Patsy. Who’d like to bring her in?’

‘I’ll go,’ said Matt, moving faster than Katie and Sukie had ever seen him move.

‘So,’ said Paul. ‘Everybody happy?’

‘Yeah,’ said Sukie. ‘I think it’s brilliant, Paul. And on behalf of all the staff, I’d like to say how much we’re looking forward to working with you.’

‘Thank you, Su—’

‘I feel I can talk on behalf of everyone,’ continued Sukie, her smile rigid, ‘because, as you may know, I’m the longest serving member of staff here.’ Paul nodded slowly. ‘By quite a long way I think,’ she went on, turning to Katie. ‘How long had I been here when you came to do part-time shifts?’ she asked. ‘You remember, when I had to show you how to use the coffee machine?’

Katie stared at her friend. It was only the pain in Sukie’s eyes that stopped her from asking what the bollocking hell she was playing at. ‘Er,’ she spoke softly. ‘I’m not sure.’ She turned to Paul and gave him a resigned nod. ‘It was quite a considerable while, I think.’

Sukie nodded. ‘Mm. It was two years actually.’

There was a pause and Paul started visibly sweating. He licked his lips, swallowed hard and turned to Sukie. ‘You’re an actress, right?’

‘Hmm,’ allowed Sukie, crossing her arms.

‘Well,’ said Paul. ‘After careful consideration and of course, Alec’s opinion taken into account, we finally decided that we couldn’t possibly have a manager who might have to go on tour suddenly. After I’ve finished my sabbatical from my job, I’m going back to work full-time and my partner has absolutely no restaurant experience,
so
we needed a manager who was one hundred per cent committed to this job. No other commitments at all. No other priorities. No other career goals. And, if I’m honest, for a while, no other interests at all. Being manager is going to be a hugely responsible, largely thankless job at first, with longer hours and only a little more pay.’

Paul stared intently at Sukie, while beside them Katie felt her inner core slowly shrivel up and topple over. She stayed motionless, hoping the others might not have noticed the subtle implication that her promotion was actually a public declaration of failure. That might have been embarrassing.

Sukie nodded, convinced. ‘I didn’t mean to be funny or anything,’ she explained kindly. ‘I think Katie will be absolutely fantastic. But you know, I just wanted to know.’

Paul smiled uncertainly, wiping his forehead with a handkerchief. ‘Blimey, I hadn’t realised it would be this hard,’ he joked with his new staff.

‘Well, what did you expect?’ Sukie asked with a big smile. ‘You come here with your “smart yet trendy; bijou yet bollocks” and expect us to just take it.’

Suddenly Paul walked to the kitchen door, muttering about Patsy. He called and was answered by the sound of giggling. Patsy was holding a mug of coffee as she came in with Matt.

‘I was just showing her how to fix the toaster,’ Matt explained. ‘And I made her a coffee.’

‘Ooh! That would be lovely,’ said Sukie. ‘Mine’s an espresso.’

They heard the strangled sound of the café door opening.

‘Did someone just kill a cat?’ asked Sukie. Everyone laughed and Katie managed a smile.

‘Aha!’ cried Paul almost ecstatically. ‘That’ll be my partner in crime.’

They waited, Sukie, Katie and Matt all watching Patsy sip her coffee.

‘Ooh,’ she enthused, licking her lips. ‘It’s lovely coffee.’

‘Yeah,’ said Paul thinly. ‘We’ll be changing it.’

Ignoring their response to this, his face lit up at the sight of a tall, broad blond Adonis who had appeared in the kitchen doorway. All eyes left Patsy.

‘All right?’ nodded the Adonis to the room in general, grinning from evenly tanned ear to evenly tanned ear.

‘Ah! Nik!’ called Paul. ‘Everyone! Meet the new chef!’

The two men bear-hugged, thumping each other so much on the back it looked like part of a ritual slapping dance.

‘Sorry we’re late, guvnor,’ said the new chef, slouching one muscle-bound shoulder higher than the other, hands in denim pockets, ‘but I had a nasty hangover. He had to wait till I got showered. He’s just parking the motor.’ He gave Patsy, Sukie and Katie their own individual cheeky grin from under long eyelashes. A giggle escaped from Patsy.

‘No matter,’ said Paul. ‘You’re here now.’ He gave a little cough and then began the introductions. ‘This is Katie, your new manager.’

‘Respect!’ exclaimed Nik and winked at her.

‘Thank you,’ said Katie primly, ‘same to you too, hopefully.’

‘And this is Sukie,’ said Paul. ‘Head waitress.’

‘Nice one,’ nodded Nik, giving her a thorough once over. ‘Nice one.’

‘I’m an actress,’ said Sukie. ‘This is just my part-time job.’

He nodded again. ‘Nice one,’ he repeated.

‘And this is Patsy,’ said Paul. ‘New waitress.’

‘Hello gorgeous,’ he said. Sukie went visibly rigid and Katie hoped very much that Nik was a good chef.

‘And this is Matt,’ continued Paul. ‘Chief washer-upper.’

‘Nice one mate,’ Nik smacked his hand into Matt’s and shook it firmly. ‘Nice one.’

‘Ow,’ murmured Matt before explaining that he was doing his A-Levels and when he wasn’t here, they’d all just have to pitch in.

‘Where the hell is the man himself then?’ Paul asked Nik. ‘Don’t tell me he’s done a runner and left the country.’ He laughed nervously.

Just then they heard the sound of the café door slamming shut and the cat being throttled once and for all. ‘We’ll get rid of that for a start!’ shouted a male voice from the café.

‘We’re in here!’ shouted Paul. ‘Move your arse!’ He started pacing. ‘Right. You’re all about to meet Dan. You’ll love him, he’s –’

‘Pardon?’ interrupted Katie. ‘What did you say his name was?’

‘Dan.’

She swallowed.

‘It’s not going to be the same one,’ tutted Sukie, examining her nails. ‘There are other Dans you know.’

‘Same one as what?’ asked Paul.

‘Nothing!’ squeaked Katie.

‘She had a hilarious date with someone called Dan,’ explained Matt. ‘We’ll tell you about it some time. We’ve got a photo of him actually –’

‘He doesn’t need to see the photo –’ said Katie, blocking the fridge.

‘You’re right,’ said Sukie, staring at the man in the doorway. ‘Because he’s standing right here.’

They all stared as their new boss stood on the threshold, beaming at them: chiselled cheekbones, blue eyes – one with a hazel fleck – and a face they all knew well from the fridge door. He was looking at Paul and hadn’t seen Katie yet.

Then he came into the kitchen.

He looked at Sukie and frowned slightly before stepping towards her and shaking her hand. He still hadn’t seen Katie. She stood, stuck to the floor in fright, as if she’d just been caught naked in someone’s living room, knowing that there were only seconds before they caught sight of her. He was saying something to Sukie and still had his back to her. Now he was shaking Matt’s hand and saying something to him. He was only inches away. She tried to think of something to do but her brain cells were too busy running round her head screaming. He turned slowly towards her and she watched as his face went from side view, still side view, nearly front view, nearly front – front view. He started to give her a polite grin. Then stopped. Then stared. Then blinked and tried to grin again. Then swallowed almost audibly. Then glanced away and then back again. Then started to speak. Then stopped. Then gave a little cough.

‘Hello,’ she probably shouted.

‘Hello,’ he said, his face frozen.

She held out her hand. He looked at it as if it was a plate of live octopus.

‘Oh,’ he said and eventually shook it. ‘Yes.’

‘Katie,’ introduced Paul proudly, as if he’d made her himself, ‘Crichton Brown’s new manager.’

‘Oh!’ Dan repeated. ‘I never . . . what was the surname again?’

‘I don’t remember,’ said Paul. ‘What was the surname again?’ he asked Katie.

Katie turned deliberately to Paul. ‘The surname is Simmonds.’

‘It’s Simmonds,’ Paul told Dan.

‘Oh,’ said Dan. ‘Excellent.’

Paul laughed nervously again. ‘Am I missing something here?’

Katie decided now would be the perfect time to explain her behaviour last time they’d seen each other.

‘I-I-I-it-you . . .’ she explained.

Dan turned to Paul. ‘Can we have a word outside?’ They left the kitchen, closing the door behind them.

Sukie looked at Katie. ‘Well done!’ she said. ‘Pithy yet pathetic.’

11

The nightclub’s low ceilings, uneven walls and interminable bass made Katie feel like she was pot-holing in hell rather than out having fun with friends. She was scrunched up between Sukie and Matt, which would have been fun were Sukie not chatting up the new chef Nik, and Matt chatting up the new waitress Patsy. Dan and Paul hadn’t come. She hadn’t wanted to come either, she’d wanted to go home and write up her menu ideas or failing that, jump off a high building, but when she’d suggested getting an early night, Sukie had thrown her a look that said ‘manager’ all over it.

She decided to go back to the upstairs bar, where she could chat to Jon, eat bar nuts and feel her own heartbeat again. She shouted to Sukie that she was going up, making enough sign language for her to understand. She squeezed out and felt Sukie and Matt lean back into her space as she tried to step over legs and feet. She pushed her way through a mass of junkie-garbed teenagers with piercings and tattoos. She felt as if she was looking at the world through the wrong end of binoculars. As she climbed the stairs, she wondered when she’d got so old. What was the
point
of thinking like a parent if the nearest she got to having children was half a first date? And then, naturally, she thought of Dan and felt sick again. Was she living a hideous reality show? Was God switching the channel back from some worthy wildlife programme in Africa to titter at the comedy that was her life?

She was in shock, that was all. It was understandable. She’d been given wonderful news and received a bolt from the blue in the matter of one hour. Everything that was happening to the café was a dream come true. It had reminded her exactly why she’d wanted to go into the restaurant business in the first place. All the enthusiasm that she’d thought had died within her had in fact just been latent, like a volcano ready to explode. And today when she’d been made manager, it had exploded, red, hot steamy lava everywhere. Then she’d been told that her new role as manager was because she was the only one of the staff who had nothing else in their life. Then, after it had taken this long to finally forget Dan, he was suddenly very much back in her life, instantly turning her insides to compost. Not only that but he was angry, which turned her insides to rotting compost. And the final icing on today’s cake was the new, totally unexpected ugly in the form of Sukie. It was only now that Katie was able to appreciate fully how great their friendship had been when they’d both just been waitresses. Would it ever be the same again? Or was Sukie too angry with her and was she too hurt by Sukie’s stunning display of disloyalty? Ah yes, yesterday, she’d had no prospects, no boyfriend and a shit job. Today, she had an even shittier job, an angry ex as her boss and she felt like she’d lost her best friend. She
should
place bets on catching flu first thing tomorrow.

Thankfully, by now she was approaching the bar. She wondered if the music in here was the newest craze to hit London or if it was her ears just ringing so loudly it was a sound in itself. It was much emptier up here. It was too posh for the teenagers and the after-work drinkers had started drifting away, having put off going home for as long as possible. She’d been here once at a weekend and watched in amazement as Jon rushed to and fro serving drinks to a queue that, like some mythological beast, just grew longer and longer until suddenly daylight robbed it of its powers. Tonight was different though and he and his colleagues were chatting easily together. He was the only bar staff without acne, and even though this was because he was the only bar staff in his mid-twenties, it was a fact Katie felt almost maternally proud of. She went and sat at her corner of the bar, picking up a bowl of nuts on the way. Jon raised his eyebrows in greeting, stopped chatting to his mates and met her there.