Then Summer Came (20 page)

He was breathing heavily and his nostrils flared.  "I was thinking of you…”  It was a raspy whisper. 

My breaths were ragged, and my mouth fell open as I stared at him, surprised.  The anger was still hot in his perfectly-brown eyes, but his look had softened. 

"What?” he breathed.  “You used me to replace Derek, and I used her and the others to replace you.”

“Why?”  Why would he need to
replace me
?  He had all of them.  There was no need for replacing.  He had a random at his every beck and call—no pun intended.

“I don’t know.”  The breathiness of his uncertainty almost broke me. 

I realized my fingers had found his stomach, and they were pushing into the crevasses of his muscles.  I could feel the heaving motion of his stomach from his heavy breaths.  He lifted his hands to my sides.  His hand was shaking, like he was scared to touch me.  His hair was dripping into my shirt and onto my chest.  My skin was on fire from the heat of his touch, and the water droplets were cool. 

He leaned in, his eyes closed, and his forehead pressed against mine.  Our breaths were colliding, and it nearly undid me.  It was soothing but it also made me tremble, and I closed my eyes as he rubbed his nose and cheek down my neck.  My skin was so sensitive to his breath and his touch.  Being that close to him overwhelmed me, made it hard to breathe or think.  He consumed me.  I wanted him, and I wanted him to want me. 

"I want you," he said against my neck, his voice deep and husky, and his lips met mine. 

That was it; that was what I wanted.  

Our hands found each other, like we were trying to catch hundred-dollar bills in a wind machine.  His fingers fisted into my hair, sliding down to cup my face in his hands.  The tension between us exploded like a well-made bomb.  He yanked, jerked, and pulled at my clothes, raking at me eagerly as he tore the garments from me. 

I pulled the towel from his waste, and it fell to the floor.  His damp, naked body was sticky against mine, and made it easy to climb him.  I couldn’t get into his arms fast enough. 

His fingers dug into my legs harder, deeper, as he carried me and dropped me onto Derek’s bed.  I moaned and cried out when his teeth came down on the inside of my thighs.  He pushed my leg into the air as his teeth grazed the sensitive skin of the underside of my leg.  He jerked my legs over his shoulders, and my heels dug into the muscles of his back.  The sweet smell of Derek’s sheets was swimming in my head. 

Beck was all sounds:  breaths, growls, and groans, as his fingers scratched across my skin—a sharp surge of pleasure.  He was always rough with me, like he couldn’t get to me quick enough; like his very life relied on how close he could get to me and how quickly he got there.  Derek was quick, too, but it always felt like he was rushing it, like he was just in a hurry to be somewhere else.

Two hours had passed, and I lay on top of Beck’s chest, my body parallel to his.  We both sat up, and I retrieved my robe from the bathroom as he tied his towel back in place.  He stopped in the bedroom doorway, his eyes burning into mine.  I wanted to wrap my arms back around him, but I heard the front door. 

“Lis?”  I heard Derek from the living room. 

I could feel my eyes widen, but Beck’s gaze was unaffected. 

I looked around, not knowing what I should do, and Beck moved away from the doorway, motioning me through it.  “Go,” he told me.  “I’ll come out in a minute.” 

I nodded and met Derek in the hallway.  I smiled and jumped into his arms, feeling like a completely horrible person.  He hugged me tightly, and didn’t seem to want to let me go.  I was happy to see him, but I felt awful about what I’d just done, and I my mind was spinning, trying to figure out when Beck was going to come out of the bedroom. 

“Arizona is finally through with me,” he smiled and kissed me, inhaling deeply as he did.

“So you can make it to the Moonlight Dance?” I chimed, trying to act as excited as possible, but I was shaking. 

His hands cradled my face.  “That’s why I came by; to let you know I’m going to make sure I’m there for the dance.  I’ll meet you there.  Walden is going to handle everything.”

“You’re amazing; so, so amazing.”

He wrapped me up in his arms and kissed me.  The kiss was easy at first, but became intense.  He slid my robe down from my shoulder and his lips and tongue slid over the skin he’d uncovered.  I smoothed my hands over his stiffened hair, and he pulled the robe down so that it hung at my hips where the sash was tied.  The cool air found my breasts.  His lips were soft and they grazed across my chest, and his tongue caressed my hardened nipples.  He kissed a trail up to my neck and back to my mouth, pulling my robe back over my shoulders as he went.  A low sound grumbled from his throat and he sighed against my lips.  “I missed you.”

I kissed him, my fingers tracing the soft skin at the nape of his neck.  “I missed you, too.”

He sighed again, louder this time, and pushed me back at arm’s length.  “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”  He kissed my forehead and walked out, assuring me once more that he’d meet me at the dance. 

“What’s ‘The Moonlight Dance’?”

I startled and turned to see Beck standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall, his arms crossed.  His towel was clinging on for dear life, and it made my heart race.  It was so strange to see Derek leave and then turn around only to find his exact replica ten feet away from me. 

"It's a dance they have every year,” I answered.  “I like to go because they play all of my favorite swing band and jazz music, like Louis Armstrong and Sinatra.  Derek takes me every year." 

"So it's some fancy-smancy shit, then?"

I chuckled.  “You want to go?” 

“Uh…”             

"There's an open bar," I added, knowing that was more his style. 

"Tempting, but I think I'm gonna pass."

Chapter Nineteen

I was all dressed and ready to go.  I didn’t’ have to leave for another half hour, so I was just sitting on the sofa at Derek’s, trying not to get anything on my dress or wrinkle it.  I’d bought my Moonlight gown months back when I spotted it in a window across from Mom’s Los Angeles shop.  She’d poked at me for not wanting to wear one of her designs, but she agreed once she’d seen the gown on me.  It was perfect.  It was the sharpest crimson color I’d ever seen.  The top was strapless, and a slit ran all the way up to the top of my thigh, on one side.  The other side was open, allowing my hip to show through—which I was in love with—and the ruching over the sides was a perfect touch.  There were no gems or sequins or beading, and I liked that; subtlety was underrated, and sometimes I just liked a subtle beauty. 

Mik was taking Emily to the dance, and she’d called every fifteen minutes to ask a question about her hair, her makeup, or her dress.  So, when the phone rang, again, I assumed it was her wanting to know if I thought a party dress was too informal or if cleavage was too trashy for such an event.  But when I picked up my phone, it was Derek. 

“Hey,” I spoke sweetly, excited to talk to him.  “Are you already there?”

“I’m trying.  Walden’s wife had her baby, so I’m picking up his slack.”

“Oh…well, there are hundreds of people there.  You can find someone to fill in.”

“I hope so.  I may be late, okay?”

“Derek, please,” I begged.  “Please, just let someone else have the reins.  It’ll be fine.  I’m asking you for this one thing.  Please, don’t’ cancel, babe.”  I sounded pitiful, but I wasn’t sure if I could stand it if he canceled on me again.

“Honey, I’m trying.  I’ll call you in a bit.” 

I tossed the phone onto the sofa beside me. 

“I thought you already left,” Beck said from behind me. 

I craned my neck back until I could see him.  He was in his gym clothes.  “I’m fixing to leave,” I told him.  “You going to the gym?” 

“Yep, it’s an all-nighter, tonight.”

My phone buzzed on the cushion beside me.  It was Derek.  “Hello?”

“Hey, babe.  I’m sorry, I can’t make it.”  He sounded almost as sad as I was. 

“Derek, please.  Just for an hour.  Please?” 

“Baby, I want to, but I don’t have a choice.  I have too much going on here.  I’m so sorry.”

“Okay,” I growled.  “That’s fine.”  I hung up without another word and slipped my heels on.  I smiled at Beck as I passed him, and I slammed the door behind me. 

I got to the dance right-on-time.  The limo pulled away, and I sighed, knowing it was going to be a lonely night. 

There were gowns and tuxes everywhere I looked, and it made me giddy.  I liked to see all of the beautiful, flowing gowns twirling around the floor and the tuxes following close behind. 

I saw Em and Mik over by the refreshment table, and I scurried to hug her.  She looked gorgeous, her cocoa hair in loose curls, and her silver dress sent her skin into a hypnotic glow.  Mik hugged me, and I noted that he looked just as amazing as his new found love did.  They were perfect together, and it made me smile.   

"Oh, Lissa, that dress is perfect on you!" my mother gushed, pulling me into a giant bear-hug, when she saw me.  She’d been that way since my grandmother had passed away:  clingy, but I liked it; when you lose someone, you realize how much everyone else means to you.

I thanked and hugged her tightly, awaiting the question of Derek's whereabouts.  She always pointed out when he was absent. 

"Derek looks very handsome, himself." I smiled at her random statement and noticed her staring over my shoulder.  I followed her line of site to a well-tailored, dark-gray suit, fitted perfectly to the hard body of my impeccably-sexy fiancé. An uncontrollable smile stretched across my face, and we met each other in the middle of the room.  The music started to play, the trumpets loud and amazing, and Derek reached for my hand.  He twirled me and pulled me in close.  Our hands locked, his hand at my back, our fronts pressed together, it was familiar and perfect. 

He spun me through three songs, and when the slow melody of The Moonlight Waltz started to play, I was thankful to be able to just rest my head on his shoulder. 

I breathed in his scent and my heart raced.  I felt his foot brush mine, and I smiled inwardly at his misstep.  I leaned back so that I could look up at him.  I looked deeply into the cerulean color of his irises, and every part of me grew tense and hot. 

He smiled charmingly and whispered, "What is it?" 

I smiled back and replied, "I like your eyes better brown." 

He blinked blankly at me and then smiled.  "You knew it was me?" 

"Of course I knew it was you," I said, settling my cheek back against his shoulder. 

We danced for a second, neither of us saying anything. 

"What gave me away?" he finally asked, his cheek against my hair. 

I peered back up at him.  "Derek's eyes aren't quite that blue."

He nodded, a defeated look in his unnaturally blue eyes. 

"And he would never miss a step,” I added with giggle.  “He's a great dancer."

"Oh, okay, I'm a bad dancer.  I got ya," he said as our dance continued.

"I never said—" 

"No, it's cool.  I get it," he said avoiding eye contact with me.  "I should've taken some lessons before impersonating such a flawless dancer, as Derek."  He mimicked a prestigious, ritzy accent and spun me. 

I laughed and he pulled me back into his chest. 

"Thanks for keeping her warm, man."  Derek's voice rang in my ears, and I pulled away from Beck. 

"Derek…" was all I could muster up.  He bent and kissed me lightly on the lips as Beck slid away from me.  He buried his eyes into the floor; I'm assuming he was trying to hide the fact that he was wearing blue contacts.  Surely Derek would’ve found that a bit strange, and he probably didn't know how to explain that he'd been trying to impersonate him. 

"You came…"  I was still stunned.  He straightened me up and pulled me into step with him.  I looked over his shoulder at Beck, who was making a beeline for the double doors in the back.  My mouth was dry and there was a knot in my stomach.  I felt beyond uncomfortable. 

“I thought you were busy?” I murmured. 

“I had Ken wrap everything up so I could be here.  I knew it was important to you.”

I tried to smile, but I had too much running through my mind.  Beck just left, and I really wanted to thank him.  And I couldn’t help but wonder if my mom or anyone noticed me with Beck.  Would they have even given it a second though?



Derek took me back to my apartment after the dance was over, with talks of meeting me for some wedding business within the week.  I was relieved to hear that he hadn't forgotten about our wedding; it sure did feel like it sometimes. 

I stepped out of the elevator on Derek's floor and unlocked the door of his apartment.  I just wanted to thank Beck before I headed upstairs.  He'd been so surprisingly sweet.  I hadn't expected him to do anything like that. 

I pulled off my heels and grabbed the bottom of my dress with my other hand and jogged up the stairs.  Beck's door was cracked.  I could see the light from his lamp, subtly illuminating the darkened room, and I could hear soft music playing quietly enough that I couldn't make out the song. 

I knocked lightly, and the door opened further.  He was still in his suit, only he’d shed the jacket, and the white button up was opened revealing his Hawaiian-kissed chest, and his pants were undone and hanging slouchy at his waist.  I took in the unusual sight of him in a tux, and my insides buzzed at how sexy he looked only halfway in the suit. 

"Lissa?" he said, thrown. 

I met his now-brown eyes and my chest ached.  They were glossy and the brown was deep and rich; he'd been drinking.  His eyes widened, still waiting for me to say something. 

I blinked away my daze and smiled at him.  "I just…I wanted to thank you…for tonight."  I looked to the floor, and couldn't help but linger at his waist for a moment.  Just where the waistband of his briefs met his skin, the muscle was hard, and the skin looked soft.  I wanted to reach out and slide my fingers under the waistband, across his warm skin.  I bit my lip to shove the thought away.  He's not Derek, I reminded myself.