Read To Have and To Hold Online
Authors: Ruth Ann Nordin
She opened the storm door and the two went into the kitchen.
***
That night after she tucked the children into bed, Mary brought the kerosene lamp up the
stairs. She set it in her bedroom and glanced out the open window in time to see Dave leave
the barn. Content, she sighed and scanned the land in the distance. She turned her gaze back
to Dave until he stepped onto the porch, the roof making it so that he was out of sight.
She heard him come in through the front door and waited as he washed up before she left the
window. As she undressed, she heard him coming up the stairs. Her skin flushed in
anticipation. They hadn’t made love since that night in her old bedroom back in Maine, and her
body ached for his touch.
By the time he opened their bedroom door, she had removed everything but her chemise and
bloomers. He stopped when he saw her and smiled. “I think it’s too hot to leave those on.”
Picking up on the teasing tone in his voice, she nonchalantly shrugged. “I don’t sleep in these. I
sleep in my nightshirt.”
“You won’t need that tonight.”
Amused, she asked, “I won’t?”
He shut the door behind him and crossed the room. When he pul ed her into his arms, she
wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. He tightened his hold on her and deepened
the kiss. Tingles of delight traveled al the way down to the tips of her toes. It’d been a long
day, what with arriving home and getting settled in, but the last thing she wanted to do was
sleep. What she wanted most was to immerse herself in his love, and she wanted to take her
time in doing it.
She lowered her arms and pul ed away from him enough so that she could unbutton his shirt.
Her hands slipped under the cotton fabric and she encouraged him to shrug it off. Afterwards,
she explored his chest beneath his undershirt before helping him take it off.
She worked on his pants next, her mind inadvertently going back to the time when he had
undressed her in a similar fashion—back when she was insecure about her looks and feared he
wouldn’t like what he saw. Other times when he made her feel beautiful flashed through her
mind, but she chose not to dwel too much on them. She wanted to focus on him and this
moment.
Stepping back from him, she took her time to appreciate his naked body in the remaining
sunlight drifting in through the window. He was as handsome as she remembered him from
when they were first married, though she hadn’t dared to actual y look at him until he had
insisted on it. She no longer had the shyness she did back then because his body was familiar
to her by now. In some ways, it felt as natural to look at him and touch him as it did for her to
look and touch her own body. He was a part of her. She traced his shoulders and then let her
hands settle on his chest.
He took her hands and put them over his heart which beat, steady and strong. “I love you,
Mary,” he said in a voice so soft it came out as merely a whisper.
She looked into his eyes and smiled. “I love you, too, Dave.”
“There wil never be anyone for me but you.”
Before she could respond, he gathered her back into his arms and kissed her. She returned his
kiss, savoring the warmth of his lips and strength of his arms. His tongue swept across her
bottom lip, encouraging her to part her mouth for him, which she did. Her flesh tingled as he
interlaced his tongue with hers. He brought his hands up her back and cupped her face,
deepening the kiss even more as he did so. His rising passion made her heart beat faster. It
was thril ing to be desired in such a way.
After he ended the kiss, he led her to the bed and helped her out of her remaining clothes
before drawing back the thin blanket so she could get comfortable on the bed. He joined her
and pul ed her back into his arms, once again kissing her in a way that made her feel as if she
was the only woman who mattered.
They remained in each other’s embrace for a good while, simply enjoying the buildup that would
eventual y lead to their climax. She ran her fingers through his hair, noting its fine texture. Her
senses became heightened as the rest of the world slipped away. His hands, rough from years
of working on the land, were gentle as they rubbed her back. His leg ran along the length of
hers.
Breathless, his mouth left hers and he kissed her jawline, her earlobe and then her neck. She
rol ed onto her back, and he fol owed, settling between her legs. He eased up on his elbows
and lowered his head, bringing his mouth to one breast and cupping the other with his hand.
With his tongue, he teased her nipple while his thumb brushed her other one. She moaned,
aware of the ache forming between her legs and shifting her hips unconsciously against him.
“Dave,” she whispered, her voice betraying her need.
He lifted his head and teased, “Getting impatient?”
She groaned in slight irritation. “Dave.”
Chuckling, he playful y squeezed her breast. “I’l be good.”
He moved down her body and brought his tongue to her sensitive nub and caressed it with
circular motions that were guaranteed to bring her to completion. She lifted her hips to grant
him better access to her body. It’d been a while since their last coming together, and her body
ached with need for him. He slid a couple fingers into her and stroked her core. She gripped
the sheet beneath her and moaned her pleasure. Her moans grew louder as she neared the
peak, and when she final y reached it, she gasped and cal ed out his name as wave after wave
of pleasure crashed into her and made her body clench around his fingers. His tongue
continued to tease her nub until she relaxed.
Afterwards, she got up and nudged him until he was on his back. As she teased his nipples
with her tongue, her hand lowered to his erection and she ran her fingers up and down him, light
enough to tease him as he’d teased her. When she was satisfied that she’d teased him long
enough, she lowered her head and took his erection into her mouth. He let out a sharp gasp,
indicating how much he enjoyed it. Wrapping his base with her hand and moving it up and down
his shaft, she traced his tip with her tongue, teasing his moist slit from time to time.
“Mary,” he groaned, “I want to be inside you.”
Wishing for the same thing, she moved so that she was on top of him and guided him into her
body. She let out a sigh of contentment. He felt good inside her. He murmured his
appreciation for her body and set his hands on her hips. She rocked her hips in unison with his
until she felt him stiffen and throb inside her. Satisfied he found his release, she stil ed and
waited for his climax to subside. When it did, he opened his eyes and smiled at her. She
returned his smile and leaned forward to kiss him. After the kiss ended, she got off of him so
she could settle next to him.
He brought her into his arms and rested his cheek on the top of her head. “Thank you for
coming to Nebraska to make my house a home. My life is complete with you in it.”
She snuggled against him, her smile growing wider. “You complete me, too.”
A comfortable silence fel between them, and she closed her eyes. Even though it was a long
day, it was a good one. With a peaceful sigh, she listened to the crickets chirping until she fel
asleep.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Mary knew she was dreaming. And once again, she was dreaming of mirrors. She walked
down the hal way, just as she had before, except this time the voices weren’t distorted. They
came through clearly, and she recognized them as being from her children, Dave and his family.
Their images showed up in the mirrors, and in them, she saw different parts of her past. She
saw Sal y stopping her and Dave her second day in Omaha. She recal ed how nice it felt that
Dave wanted her al to himself for a month. She saw herself riding Susannah for the first time
and recal ed how nervous she’d been. In another mirror, she remembered the first day she’d
gone to Dave’s parents, the same day they got Jasper and Dave had cal ed her pretty.
“I don’t care what they say, Mary. I think you’re pretty.”
That was the day she was able to break free from her family’s estimation of her. Her face
flushed with pleasure at the memory of the way Dave had held her. Though Grace had been
supportive and hugged her, her other family members weren’t comfortable with either praise or
touch. Dave spent a lot of time touching her and tel ing her things no man ever had but she’d
hungered to hear. And didn’t every woman want her husband to value her in such high
esteem? How could she not love Dave for al he’d done for her?
Her attention went to other mirrors, some revealing good times and some bad. She recal ed
her miscarriage and the sorrow that fol owed, but then she gave birth to Isaac and cried with
joy when she held him for the first time. From there, she recal ed his first smile, his first steps,
his first words. Then she was expecting Rachel. At that time Dave and his brothers built the
new house so they moved out of the sod one.
She saw images of the men at harvest time as she and the women cooked their meals and
served them to the men who sat on the lawn of the property they were tending to that day.
The friendship she shared with the women warmed her heart. And even more so, she smiled
as she recal ed the times she’d spent with Sal y and Jenny, and then April joined their group
after she married Joel. There were a couple of women she didn’t get along with, one being
Cassie Craftsman who ignored her daughter Emily. Mary recal ed making clothes for Emily and
giving her other things she thought the girl might need.
Mary recal ed days of baking, days of riding a horse, days of helping Dave in the fields. She
remembered bitter winters and a harsh summer where they’d lost most of their crops. Had it
not been for the cel ar where they saved up food, they wouldn’t have made it as wel as they
did. Then there were years of plenty and celebrating at the end of the harvest when the
families got together.
She didn’t feel the need to escape the hal way but felt free to linger until she realized she
remembered everything. This time when she woke up, it was dawn and she was wrapped in
Dave’s arms. She smiled and closed her eyes, content to relive her memories of her life in
Nebraska a little bit longer.
***
Two weeks later
“Is everyone ready?” Dave asked as he opened the front door.
Mary finished tying Rachel’s shoes and stood up. Isaac ran across the parlor and leapt into
Dave’s arms. “We’re ready,” she said as she tied the ribbons on her bonnet and picked Rachel
up.
Rachel snuggled into her arms while she fol owed Dave and Isaac out the door and to the
buckboard wagon. After Dave helped everyone in, he hopped up on his side, whistled for
Jasper to join them and released the brake. “You couldn’t ask for a better day to get everyone
together.”
“No, you couldn’t,” she agreed, putting one arm around Isaac and another around Rachel as the
horses pul ed the buckboard forward. She turned her face to the sky and saw there wasn’t so
much as a cloud in sight. “Is it possible that Sal y knew it’d be such a nice day when she
planned for everyone to meet at your parents?”
He chuckled. “Even Sal y doesn’t have that much power.”
“You don’t know that. She might,” she teased.
Noting his amusement, she smiled and turned her attention to the scenery around them. The
crop was growing wel . This would be one of those good years, but as she’d done in times
past, she’d save aside a portion of the crops for the future. She breathed in the fresh air,
thankful the wind was cooling things down today. On some days, the wind only made things
hotter, but today it made everything just right. While Isaac started talking to his father about
the crops, Rachel fel asleep and took a quick nap before they arrived at Dave’s parents.
Dave parked their buckboard next to Tom and Jessica’s and glanced at the row of wagons and
buggies. “Looks like everyone is here.”
One of the dogs ran up to them, and Jasper barked before jumping down to run off to play. “I
think Jasper needed to see his friends as much as we did,” Mary mused.
“He needs to burn off his energy.” Dave got down from the wagon and helped them to the
ground. He gave Mary’s waist a light squeeze and kissed her cheek. “Wouldn’t it be nice if we