To Heaven and Back (10 page)

When I looked up from the gurney and recognized the face of my internist looking down at me, I knew I was at last home and immediately lost
consciousness. I was taken into the emergency room and placed in one of the small examination cubicles. My oxygen levels were dangerously low and did not respond to the administration of oxygen.

Preliminary evaluation showed an advanced pneumonia and acute respiratory distress syndrome (ARDS). ARDS is a severe inflammatory reaction in the lungs to a major insult, such as a near drowning, fat embolism, pneumonia, smoke inhalation, or other major trauma. This reactive swelling of the lung tissue often develops after twenty-four to forty-eight hours, interferes with the ability to exchange oxygen, and often leads to death. My internist gravely told my husband that I would probably not make it through the night.

Natalie, the medical assistant of my internist, was sitting in the cubicle next to mine, separated by a thin curtain. She had driven another member of our church, Sherry, to the emergency room for the treatment of a cut finger. When they saw the facial expressions of the people around me and heard the words of my internist, they immediately began to pray. They prayed for the saving of my life, for the healing of my body, for the emotional strength of my family, and for us to be enveloped by God’s grace. They prayed intensely, passionately, and specifically. They soon left the emergency room and went to the high school basketball game, where much of the community was cheering on our young people. They quickly sent around the message
of my injury and encouraged others to begin praying. Within an hour of my emergency room arrival, there were a great many people praying for me. Natalie went home and continued to pray fervently. She prayed until four in the morning, when suddenly she felt like she could rest.

While others were lifting me up to the Lord with their prayers, I was lying in the intensive care unit. For much of the night, my body struggled for survival. According to the medical records, about 4
A.M.
, the same time Natalie felt released from prayer, my vital signs stabilized and the nurses were able to take a tentative sigh of relief. It looked like I was going to make it after all.

A friend of mine later told me that she thought I survived the night because with all of those people praying for me, God would have been embarrassed to let me die. I don’t know about that, but God’s compassion certainly reinforced the power of prayer to everyone involved.

I was awakened the following morning by the arrival of two deacons from our church. They own a local outdoor shop and came bearing a stack of great magazines for me to read. As delightful as my deacons were, I will admit that I was looking forward to their departure so I could get started on the magazines. Strangely, I felt great. I had no pain and was quite clear mentally.

I picked up a
Cross Country Skier
magazine as soon as they left and was surprised to find that, despite my historically having 20/20 vision, the pages were
too blurry for me to read. I put them aside and turned on the television. The picture on the screen was too blurry for me to understand. The nurse came in and I found that she, too, looked blurry. I was no longer comfortable having a conversation, as I could not look at any one spot for more than a couple of seconds without the blurriness becoming too uncomfortable. It was very distracting and irritating, so I opted to take a nap. When I awoke, I asked the nurse if there was a Bible anywhere. She produced a Gideon’s Bible—I always wondered who read those—and I proceeded to look for verses about gaining strength and such. I looked to
Psalms
and searched for well-known verses such as these:

Unfortunately, the printing in the Bible was also too blurry for me to read. Just as I was closing
the book in frustration and tossing it aside, something distinct and clear flashed before my eyes. Presuming that my vision had cleared, I returned to the psalms. The words were still blurry. Again I began to carelessly flip through the pages as I closed the book. Again, something became clear and legible. I then carefully searched through the pages until I was able to find the verse that was crystal clear.

It read:

Wow. I began to contemplate the meaning of this verse, as it was clearly a directive from God. In my contemplations, I thought about the fact that a joyful heart and a joyful spirit are clearly important to God, and the word “joy” is mentioned throughout all the books of the Bible. I had always been a “happy” person and generally saw the rosy side of things, but joy is clearly different than happiness. It is not based on circumstances, but on the presence, hope, and promises of God. Even when it feels as if we are being crushed by earthly troubles, we can remain joyful. If we keep our focus on God, our spirit cannot be trampled. Joy is a state of mind and a state of being. It reflects a conscious choice to believe in the promises of the Bible.

Later in the day, a second verse became clear to my vision. It read:

Prayer is the way we are able to communicate with our Lord. This verse directs us to maintain a continually open line of communication with Him. It instructs us that we should live a life of prayer, continuously offering silent prayers with every breath we take, and always listening for God’s leading.

In the past, I had believed in the power to pray for one’s self: for forgiveness, for change, for insight, and so forth. I had subscribed to the concept that prayer does not change the outcome of a situation, but it changes us in the process. While I still hold firmly to my belief in this aspect of prayer, I have subsequently realized that it does not represent the whole story, for Jesus said, “Where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.” I had now personally experienced this promise of Jesus and the remarkable power of people praying for the well-being of others. I began to see my life and each breath I am given as a living prayer to God and a way to pray for others and for our world.

The last verse that became clear to my vision that day was this:

Double and triple wow! I was immediately reminded of the often-told fable about giving thanks and being grateful for little things:

The rest of the Bible, other written material, the television, and even the faces of those people I love continued to be blurry for several days. Due to this continued blurriness, I wasn’t able to read anything other than these three Bible verses, couldn’t watch TV, and didn’t want to converse with anyone. All I did was read and re-read these three verses. These are three of the briefest verses in the Bible, yet I believe they are far reaching and summarize much of what God asks of us.

I spent a great number of hours contemplating what God was asking of me. Even before my boating accident, I did not really believe in luck or coincidence as phenomena. I believed that God has a hand in most things and that most of what happens is part of a larger plan. I was laying in my hospital bed wondering about the purpose of my accident when I suddenly found myself sitting on a rock in a large, sun-drenched field.

I was having a “conversation” with an angel who was sitting on a nearby rock. I call the being an angel, but I don’t really know what he was: angel,
messenger, Christ, or teacher. I do know that he was of God, in God, and from God. As we conversed, I asked questions, and he gave me answers. We discussed how to “rejoice always,” even in the midst of terrible circumstances, and discussed the longstanding question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” During this conversation, I received the following wisdom.

We are each given the opportunity and privilege to come to earth for different reasons. Sometimes we come in order that we may personally develop and strengthen the fruits of our spirit: those of love, kindness, patience, joy, peace, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Sometimes we come to help someone else develop the fruits of the spirit. We all come to earth to become more Christ-like, as noted in
Romans 8
.

In preparation for our journey to earth, we are able to make a basic outline for our life. This is not to imply that we, the humans, are entirely in charge of our life’s design. It is more like God creates it, then we review it and discuss it with our “personal planning” angel. Within the algorithm are written branch points in our lives at which times we may exit, returning to God, or we may be redirected to a different task and goal.

We may be directed to these branch points by our own conscious choice and by our circumstances, or we may be pushed along by angelic intervention. Have you ever shown up somewhere
at “just the right time”? When you think back on your life, can you remember a person who briefly entered your life, saying something or doing something that impacted your life out of proportion to what they actually said or did? What were the circumstances that brought you together with your spouse or the detailed circumstances of other such notable events in your life? Have you ever been randomly thinking of someone who then unexpectedly shows up or contacts you? Has something ever happened that left you thinking “That’s weird”? Consider whether these are sets of “coincidences” or whether they might be orchestrated events; evidence of God’s hand in our lives.

Although we are rarely aware of angels or their intervention in our world, I believe there are angels all around us every day of our lives. Angels are spirit beings who are mentioned more than 250 times in both the Old Testament and the New Testament of the Bible. They appear as creatures, events, and humans, offering praise and worship to God. They care for, protect, and guide God’s people, frequently intervening or bringing messages to people from God. They are the ones orchestrating the “coincidences” that occur so commonly in our lives.

Of note is that most theologians would agree that angels live among us according to God’s will, not our own. Lewis Sperry Chafer wrote in
Systematic Theology
(Kregel, 1993), “One reason angels are rendered invisible to human sight may be that if
they were seen, they would be worshiped. Man, who is so prone to idolatry as to worship the works of his own hands, would hardly be able to resist the worship of angels were they before his eyes.”