Troubled Waters (The Lake Trilogy, Book 2) (3 page)

I excuse myself to the back yard and find myself walking the long passageway of the dock to the lake for the first time since our arrival here. The path is lined with shrubs and trees with Spanish moss trailing down like vines and is very typically Floridian. It’s thick in some parts and I have to brush branches and vines away as I move. When I arrive at the end of the dock I’m filled with mixed emotions. I’m elated and depressed at the same time. The manmade lake is nowhere near the size of Lake Davidson. Comparatively speaking, it’s more like a massive pond.

I’m taken back to the first time Will and I sat at the end of the Lake Davidson dock together and I’m happy. I remember how nervous he was when he asked if I had seen the lake from the dock at night. I remember how it felt to feel the warmth of his body close to mine, and how he rescued me from an impending broken limb by taking my hand and guiding me up the flagstone to the house.

I feel the sting of tears in my eyes recalling the honesty of our conversations there, but I can’t fight the tears anymore when I play back our graduation night. I trace my finger over my more-than-a-promise ring and recommit myself to the vow I made to Will.
I will never give up on us.

I sit and stare out at the water, waiting to connect with this place as I did with its predecessor, praying to God that it happens soon because I don’t think I will last another second here without the safety this connection will bring.

*****

My phone has been ringing off the hook all day. Marcus has literally called me seventeen times in six hours. Apparently
leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can
doesn’t really mean anything to him. When the day is just about over, and I decide it’s too late for me to go out, I call him back.

“Layla! Are you ok? You haven’t called me back all day!” Marcus sounds distressed. I’ve never heard him like this. He was usually so calm, cool, and collected.

“I’m fine, Marcus. I’ve just been busy today.”

“Well, I’m just glad that you’re ok. So, do you want to get that coffee?” he asks.

“You know, I’m super tired. It’s been a long day. It feels like we’re never going to get fully unpacked,” I say, hoping to convey a reasonable excuse as to why I can’t go out. I’m going to have to face him with the truth at some point. I won’t be able to come up with excuses forever.

“Oh, yeah, I totally understand,” he says hesitantly annoyed.

“Maybe another time?” I say as a peace offering.

“Definitely!”

“I’m sorry to cut it so short. I need to chill a little before I head to bed. Ok?”

“Chilling out sounds like a great plan. I’ll talk to you soon then.”

After echoing goodnights I take a shower and plop myself onto the couch in the Great Room with Luke and Claire. It’s about 9:00 pm and I’m exhausted.  Luke, Claire and I chit chat about the day and do our daily strategizing for the continued unpacking. When the doorbell rings we all mirror each other with puzzled looks. Luke dutifully gets up to answer the door since it’s later than anyone should become an unexpected visitor.

I don’t know why I’m surprised when Luke returns with Marcus at his side.

“Hello, Marcus,” Claire says greeting him a bit more sternly than if he had called before he came. “Layla said you pulled quite a surprise by transferring to FSU. How’s it going so far?”

“Hello, Mrs. Weston. It’s going great. I got settled into my apartment a couple weeks ago and have been coordinating my classes. The last thing to do was to get reconnected with Layla. Now that I’ve done that, my life here is all set up!” He sounds like a little boy who just got the bicycle he’s been asking for, almost giddy. Wait. If he’s been here for two weeks, he arrived just a week after we did! “I know you were too tired to go out, so I thought I’d swing by. I hope you don’t mind.”

Actually, I mind very much.

“It’s fine. Why don’t we go out on the patio?” I get up and give Claire a wide-eyed looked, hoping to convey a “
Please
do not leave me out there too long with him. I really just need enough time to nip this in the bud.”

Marcus follows me like the puppy he has transformed into and we take opposing seats on the patio. “Does that dock lead to a lake? We could go sit down there if you want,” he says.

NO!
“No, this is good. Besides, I don’t think it’s well lit.” There’s no way I’m going down there with him in the dark. “So, I think we should talk.”

“Yeah, I think so, too.” He clears his throat and I am filled with anxiety about what the next words out of his mouth are going to be. It’s not the kind of throat-clearing one does as a means of actually clearing your throat. It’s the kind that’s a precursor to having something important to say. “First, I want to say again how sorry I am about Will. I know you really loved him.”
Love him. I love him. It’s not past tense.
“So I wanted to give you some time, you know, to get over him. That’s why I’ve been here for a few weeks and didn’t tell you.”

“Get over him?” I challenge.

“Yeah. There’s talk that Will’s dad is going to have Will and his mom declared dead. You knew that, right?” Marcus says conversationally, as if he didn’t just say
Will
and
dead
in the same sentence.

“They haven’t found any bodies, Marcus. Until they do, Will and his mother are still alive as far as I’m concerned.” I’m serious in my statement. I can’t be wishy-washy; I have to be strong.

“Bodies or not…” Marcus’ tone is off. I can’t put my finger on it, but something isn’t right.

“So, you’re wanting…what?” I ask needing him to fill in the blanks. I want to hear it straight from him before I possibly tear into him for once again inserting himself into my life without my permission.

“Well…” He clears his throat again and straightens his posture. His puppy dog eyes are gone and in their place I see the fire of a determined man. “I care about you, Layla. I always have. And, not to be insensitive, but, now that Will is…gone…I hoped I could help you start over…with me.” He reaches across the table and intentionally takes my left hand in his. “We could be great together, Layla. You just have to let go.” He runs his thumb over my ring and I snatch my hand back.

“Marcus,” I take a deep breath trying to compose myself. He has tainted any hope of us being friends and that makes me furious. He was another link to home and now he’s ruined it. “I don’t know what you thought was going to happen, but I don’t feel the same way about you. I told you that back in Davidson. I’m sorry that you moved here under that assumption, but…you and me, we’re never going to be more than friends.”
If that
.

“Hmmm. Well, I beg to differ,” he says confidently, his posture and tone changing. He’s sitting back in his chair now, resting his ankle on his knee.

“Pardon me?”

“When we were back in Davidson,
pretending
to be together, it was more than just pretending with me…and I know it was the same with you, too.” He leans across the table in a move to take control of the conversation physically.
Is he trying to intimidate me into being with him?
“Tell me you didn’t like being close to me, and I’ll leave.”

I don’t know why I don’t just lie to him, but when I open my mouth the most foolish thing comes out.

“It was…
nice
. But you have to understand, Marcus, it wasn’t the same for me. I
was
pretending, but it felt nice to be close to someone I thought I could trust when I couldn’t be with Will.” He’s staring at me with piercing eyes and I feel a familiar uneasiness come over me. I can’t place it because I’ve never felt this way around Marcus.

“You may say you were pretending, but I know. I won’t make you say it, not yet at least.” He sits back in his chair again, a disturbing air of confidence consuming him.

“Marcus, I think you need to leave. And don’t call me or communicate with me for a while. I’m trying really hard to still want to be your friend, so you’re going to have to give me some time here. Do you understand me?” I try to be solid in my delivery, the same way Claire can be when the situation calls for it.

“I understand,” he says with a smirk.

“Are we clear?”

“Crystal.”

“Then I think it’s time for you to go. I’ll communicate with you when I’m ready. Don’t rush me, Marcus. Frankly, right now you’re lucky I haven’t called Luke to escort you out.”

“There’s no need to get hostile, Layla. I’ve had a lot of time to think about what you want and I’m confident that you’ll come around.” Marcus lets himself out while I stay on the patio, completely stunned by what just unfolded.

He’s had time to think about what I want? What does that even mean?

“Are you ok?” Claire asks stepping out onto the patio from the porch with Luke a few moments later.

“Yeah, I guess. It’s just so weird. I don’t know what’s come over him. He handled my rejection back home really well, but now, it’s like he’s a different person. You should have seen him. He was cocky and arrogant. And when I told him I didn’t feel the same way about him, he actually said ‘I beg to differ.’ Can you believe that?”

“What did he say?” Luke asks slowly.

“He said, ‘I beg to differ.’ And then he tried to convince me that I preferred being with him while we were all show for Mr. Meyer,” I explain.

“Hmmm.” Luke’s eyes are searching for something in his mind.

“Is that supposed to mean something?” I ask.

“It’s just a strange response, don’t you think?” Claire interjects.

“Definitely. And now I am sufficiently spent. I’m going to bed. I told him not to communicate with me, so…”

“We’ve got it covered,” Luke reassures me. He’s practiced at running interference for me.

I lay in bed thinking about how strange the last 48 hours have been. Seeing the Eliana Meyer clone was enough to freak me out, but then Marcus showing up? Him being here is more than I can handle right now. I wish he had told me he was coming. I would have told him that I didn’t think it was a good idea. I would have told him that what I really need right now is to be in a place where I can start over, where nothing reminds me of the life I was forced to leave behind. But he’s here now and I have a feeling there is nothing I could have said that would have kept him from coming here. I can only hope that he’ll respect my wishes and give me time and space.

I’m making it through my first week of classes pretty well, and despite my efforts against it, I’m making a few friends. It’s a state school, so the majority of the students are like me. We’ve worked hard to get where we are, not having life handed to us on a silver platter. There are a few people who immediately put me at ease, but I still can’t bring myself to take the wall down completely. It’s not as heavily guarded as it once was, so I guess that’s good.

The campus coffee shop is quickly becoming my favorite place to pass the time during my two hour layover between classes. It’s here where I seem to be connecting with someone I might actually be brave enough to let in.

Finn is a barista on a work- study program. He’s tall with short brown hair, brown eyes, and built like a football player. He’s funny, charming, smart, and we have the same taste in men, so
that
not being an issue makes me feel safe. He’s a music major and our little conversations about artists I’ve never heard of remind me of Will.

“Hey chai tea latte,” he says as he comes through the shop to wipe tables. “How’s your day going?”

“Hey barista guy,” I tease in response. “Pretty good, how about you?”

“Great! Didn’t anyone ever tell you that being a barista is the best job ever? I don’t know why we’re all wasting our money on a great education.”

“Seriously!” We both laugh and I have another moment of feeling like Finn might be someone I can trust one day. My gut isn’t screaming that I should turn and run, and that’s a good sign.

“Did you listen to that Alex Clare album I suggested?” he asks as he stocks the counter next to me with stir straws and sweetener.

“Yeah, actually. I loved it! Thanks for the recommendation.” I ponder telling him about having a
friend
back home who challenged me to broaden my musical horizons like he does, but decide it’s too soon. The fact that I’m considering it is very telling, though.

“Well, I’ve got a whole list of artists you’ll have to check out. Now that you trust my impeccable judgment your lessons have officially begun!” His reference to music lessons like Will and I used to have doesn’t scare me like I thought it would have. It actually puts me at ease, allowing me to hold on to something that was so special between Will and me.

We laugh, but the laughter turns sour for me as I spot Marcus across the coffee shop. “Oh, no.”

“What? That guy?” Finn says taking note of Marcus, too. “That guy has been in here every day this week. You didn’t notice him before?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Is he bothering you? You want me to have him kicked out?” Finn offers. “What’s the deal?”

“No, don’t kick him out. I’m not quite sure what will happen if you do.” I sigh, wondering what to tell Finn about Marcus. I swore I wasn’t going to tell anyone about my life before FSU, but my gut tells me there’s something about Finn that I can trust, so I decide to divulge a snippet of my past life to him and still be in the clear since it won’t have anything to do with Will. Besides, if Marcus is going to play stalker, I’m going to need some help here on campus. “He’s a guy from back home. He was interested in me and I told him I didn’t feel the same way. I moved down here with my uncle and aunt to, you know, go to school and kind of start over, and he followed me. I thought we were going to be great friends, but he’s had some kind of psychotic break because he transferred schools and is now under the assumption that he and I are going to be together. I told him to back off and I would call him if and when I was ready to talk. But…here he is, existing in a loop hole to my instructions, staring me down in your coffee shop. So…that’s the deal.”