True Colors (4 page)

He said the words again, sounding like a raving lunatic and making it that much easier to leave his side. It was just getting weird now. I raised my hand in farewell and double timed it back to the club. The bouncer didn’t even check my ID, just waved me through as he recognized me from last time. I gave him a grateful smile and immersed myself back into the thumping fray.

The music felt a million times louder than when I’d left. I rubbed my temples, feeling the onset of a monster headache. It was coming on super-fast, too. Trying to ignore the pain, I wiggled and pushed my way through the crowd. Stella saw me coming and waved. I finally busted my way through to them. Chase caught me against him and placed a sloppy kiss on my lips. He tasted like more than beer and the lax way his limbs were moving made me wonder how much he’d downed while I was gone.

His hungry tongue worked over my neck, something I’d usually enjoy, but my headache was growing worse by the second. My eyes were killing me, my temples were pounding, and nausea was setting in fast. I had to pull away.

“I’m sorry,” I yelled, stumbling away from him. “I gotta go.”

I grabbed my head and nearly fell over as I made my way out for the third time that night. The headache was near blinding by the time I reached the door.

“Caitlyn!” I ignored Stella’s pissed off call and threw myself at the exit.

The bouncer had to catch me as I tripped out onto the curb.

“You alright, Miss?”

“She’s fine.” Stella snatched my arm and dragged me away from the burly guy. “What is up with you tonight?” She swung me around to face her.

“I can’t.” I swallowed back the bile. “I feel sick.”

“You haven’t even been drinking. What the hell did you do in the bathroom?”

“Nothing,” I mumbled. “It’s just a migraine.”

Stella’s frown softened a little and she rubbed my back as I braced my hands on my knees. “Are you still nervous about doing it with Chase? Because I asked him, and he said he's taking you to a motel, so you're not just doing it in the back of his car or anything. It’ll be fine.”

“It’s not about Chase.” Who I was very aware had not followed me out to check whether I was okay. “I just need to get home.”

“But Caity,” Stella whined. “I’m not ready to go yet.”

I knew I should have been pissed at my friend’s attitude. I was seriously in pain here, but I didn’t have the energy to feel anything more than a desperate need to get home. “Just call me a cab. Please, Stella.”

With a reluctant huff she yanked out her phone and dialed a taxi for me. I had no idea how I was supposed to ask her for money, but thankfully my best friend redeemed herself by staying with me until the taxi showed up and giving the guy my address and a fifty-dollar note.

I leaned against the doorframe muttering a thank you and asking her to say sorry to Chase. She promised to do it. I noticed her disappointment at being abandoned by me and made a mental note to apologize again in the morning. Squeezing my eyes shut, I willed the morning to come, anything to stop this excruciating headache.

Chapter 4

The morning brought minimal relief. I woke after a night of weird dreams. My top sheet was tangled around my limbs, a total giveaway to my restlessness. Kicking it off me, I flicked it out and let the cotton float back over me. I squeezed my eyes shut with a groan.

Mom was already in bed when I had stumbled through the door last night. I downed two Tylenol and headed straight for bed, stripping off my clothes as I went. I scrambled beneath my covers in my panties and tank top, begging sleep to take me.

I so didn’t want to get up. I’d never been hung over before, but I was guessing this is what it felt like. I didn't get it. I hadn't drunken a drop. Maybe Chase's alcohol infused kisses got me drunk by osmosis or something.

I placed my hand on my forehead, expecting a temperature, but I was fine. Just aching temples and burning eyes. I’d had migraines in the past - only a couple, but none that had set in this quickly. I couldn’t believe how fast it took me down the night before either. It was weird.

Rolling to my side, I pulled the covers over my shoulders, more than grateful that I could spend the day in bed. I didn’t want to face anyone or anything this morning.

My door burst open.

“You’re still in bed? It’s eleven o’clock already. I got home five hours after you and I’m up!”

I squeezed my eyes shut, cringing at Stella’s staccato voice. Her words felt like bullets raining into my ears.

“Stella,” I mumbled. “I told you, I’m sick.”

“Oh come on.” She nudged my shoulder. “It’s just a headache. Take some painkillers. Don’t waste the day in bed. The sun is shining and lawns are about to be mown.”

I heard her move to the window and shuffle stuff around on my desk. She was no doubt perching her perfect behind on it so she could get the optimum view.

“Eeeeppp! There he is. Come on, Eric, take off your shirt, baby.”

I swallowed, fighting the urge to get up and join her. But I couldn't. My limbs felt like Jello and there was no way my chicken neck could support my concrete head.

The lawn mower started up, another punishing blow to my ears. I grabbed my pillow and shoved it over my head. Stella’s swooning was mercifully muffled. I waited it out, trying not to get pissed. I just wanted Stella to leave me alone! I wanted peace. I wanted quiet.

Finally the lawn mower cut off. With a disappointed tut, Stella got off my desk and plonked herself beside me. Her hand rubbed my shoulder.

“Sorry you’re feeling sick. You missed out on a good night. I didn’t get home from the club until one.”

I grunted.

“Chase was pretty disappointed you had to leave early. He was really looking forward to...you know.”

I wanted to mumble something about him not even trying to see me home, so “you know” probably wouldn’t be happening for a while now anyway. But I couldn’t be bothered.

“You guys can talk about it later today. I’ll tell him to call and take you out for ice cream or something.”

The word NO was on the tip of my tongue, but Stella patted my shoulder before I could talk. “Get some rest, okay?”

I was rising to my elbows in protest, but she was out the door before the pillow had even fallen off my head. I snatched it back and plonked my head down with a sigh.

“Ow.”

*****

Chase called at two. By then I’d managed to get some more sleep, eat a little fruit salad and yogurt, and get some more pain killers into me. My head was slowly starting to clear and my eyes only hurt a little. At first I wasn’t sure if I wanted to talk to him. I was still kind of miffed that he hadn’t even bothered to check on me. My thumb hovered over the screen, but then I sighed and unlocked it.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Chase’s voice was soft, quelling my annoyance. “How you feeling?”

“Better.”

“Is it okay if I pick you up soon? I thought we could go for a drive, have a chat.”

How could I say no? His voice was so soft and sweet and I suddenly wanted to see him.

I smiled. “Sure.”

“See you in an hour, okay?”

“Okay.”

Throwing back the covers, I shuffled out of bed and headed for the shower. I was more than grateful to find Mom’s note downstairs saying she was out for the day with my eldest sister, Layla, and the grandkids. My mom was such a sucker for kids and Layla knew it. She was always calling on Mom to help her out. They were often here on the weekends, overtaking the house. Thankfully they were never allowed in my room. That was my Dad’s ruling and I loved him for it.

The shower revived me, my new handmade Bella Fresca soap making me feel crispy clean. The scent was called Surf & Sand, no wonder it made me feel so fresh. I let my hair dry naturally, something that would take ages to do and probably give me a little frizz, but I didn’t care. It felt so nice wet and cool against my back that I walked around in nothing but
my jeans and bra until I heard Chase honk the horn.

I pulled on my shirt and buttoned it as I descended the stairs. Grabbing my phone and a little cash, I shoved them in my back pocket, yanked on my flat slip-on shoes and scurried out to the car.

“Hey you.” Chase greeted me with a kiss.

I closed the passenger door behind me and blushed. “Hey.”

Putting the car in gear, he pulled away from the curb and headed for the beach. “So, you feeling better?”

I glanced at him to answer and my breath hitched. He looked different this morning. I couldn’t figure out what it was, but there was something weird. His cool charm had vanished and now he looked plain pissed.

My stomach clenched. Adjusting the ring on my finger, I looked at my lap. “Sorry about bailing last night."

"No big deal." He shrugged, looking casual enough. Maybe I had just imagined the dark look I saw. I stayed quiet for a minute, studying him out of the corner of my eye. The longer I looked at him, the more the calm facade slipped away and I could see his anger. The smooth lines of his face were hard and unrelenting as he scowled ahead.

“Why are you so mad?"

"I'm not." Stopping at the intersection, he glanced at me and smiled, but it wasn’t a kind smile at all, it was rigid and forced. I didn’t get it. His voice was so calm and casual, like he actually meant what he was saying, but I could see it all over his face. He was not impressed with me, at all.

I blinked slowly and looked at him again. The anger was gone and I could see the sweet smile he was giving me. The light turned green. As Chase accelerated through it, I kept watching him, waiting for the angry change up. This was freaking me out. Why nice one minute and pissed the next?

He didn’t say anything, which wasn’t helping. I wanted to hear his calm voice and assure myself that all his dirty looks were a figment of my warped imagination.

I bit the corner of my lip and stayed quiet for the rest of the trip. We were soon pulling up to one of our favorite beach lookouts. Chase parked.

“Come on,” he grinned. “Let’s go for a walk.”

I took the picnic rug he handed me and tucked it under my arm. That black look was back in his eyes again. I almost didn’t want to let him take my hand, but he grabbed it before I could pull away.

This was mega awkward, there was no way I could enjoy our afternoon together if we didn’t clear the air now.

I swallowed as we made our way over the grass verge. “I really am sorry about last night. I wouldn’t have bailed if I hadn’t felt so bad.”

“I said it was fine.” There was that shrug again and the smile slipped into a frown. I blinked and looked at him. The frown was gone and he was smiling sweetly at me. I grinned back, but then his sweet smile disappeared and became that hard-edged grimace I saw before.

What the hell was going on?

I jerked to a stop.

“Chase, you look really pissed off...like you don't believe I was sick or something."

He let go of my hand with a huff and stepped away from me. “Come on, Caitlyn, a headache, really?"

"Yes, really."

Why would he not believe me?

The rejection he felt last night flashed across his face as he ran a hand through his hair. It was followed by a look of disappointment and then anger again. I couldn’t believe he was letting me see all of this. Chase Mitchell was not the kind of guy to talk about feelings, let alone let them all show. He obviously really wanted me to know how much I’d let him down.

I so did not want to have this conversation right now and I wanted to die instead of ask, but I knew I had no choice. Not with him looking at me with such open anger. “You're mad because we didn't have sex.”

His smile was tight, forced. “Well, excuse me for being disappointed. I thought I was going to get some and it fell through."

"You did not just say get some." I closed me eyes and looked away from him.

His voice went soft as he took my shoulders and gently squeezed them. "I thought you wanted this too.”

"I do, but not when I have a screaming headache. It's my first time. It's a big deal." I finally looked back at him.

His smile was sweet as he tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. "It's just sex, babe."

Mom’s words rang through my head,
There's no such thing as just sex. I hate the way people cheapen it like that
, and I couldn’t help asking. "Do you love me?"

"What?" He looked incredulous and about ready to gag.

"Do you love me?" I repeated the words slowly.

His chuckle was filled with nervous energy as he rubbed my arm and gently lowered his hands, shoving them into his jean pockets. “We've only been together a couple months, it's a little early to start pulling out the L word, isn’t it?”

"But it's not too early to be screwing each other?”

"What is your problem today?" Once again his voice and face didn’t match. He looked so much more annoyed than he sounded. I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples, feeling the onset of another throbbing headache.

"We're teenagers, Caitlyn. Of course we want sex." I couldn’t help noticing the way his eyes trailed down my body, hunger obvious in his dark expression.

Hugging the blanket to my chest, I looked at the grass. “You know what? Maybe I'm not ready. I thought I was but...I'm sorry, okay?" I shook my head.