True Devotion (32 page)

The art gallery showing was by invitation only. It was obvious at a glance that this was not her normal crowd, but for an evening Kelly decided she could pretend she fit in. It was a little like being Cinderella for a night.

“Let’s wander,” Charles suggested.

Kelly slipped her hand under his arm, content to take his advice. “Let’s.”

An hour later Kelly was confident Charles was more interested in her impression of the art than he was in studying it. She also knew from his occasional comments that she had good taste. They circled through the second-floor galleries. “I like this one.”

Charles studied the painting. “Do you? Why?”

“The painter understood solitude.”

“Solitude? The lady looks lonely.”

“She has her memories.”

Charles looked at the painting, then back at her. “Would you like it?”

She laughed. It wasn’t the first time he had asked her that question tonight. “The only thing you are buying me tonight is one of those hot pretzels you told me about from the shop around the corner.”

“Come on, we can have dinner first.”

He took her to a small restaurant near the gallery and told her stories about the Orient, London, Paris, and Rome. He made a life spent traveling come alive. When he suggested his home for coffee, Kelly was comfortable enough to want to go.

His home was a surprise. Not just the baseball glove dropped on the stairs or the stack of library books on the side table, but the trophies on the fireplace mantel and the snapshots on the tables. It looked like a lived-in, comfortable home. A wealthy man’s home. The wall of windows overlooking the crashing surf below made Kelly appreciate why Charles had chosen this house.

“You have a beautiful home. And quite an art gallery of your own.” Kelly paused by a painting in the living room, a small work of flowers. “This is exquisite.”

“Your taste is excellent.” He handed her the coffee. “Wander around; I’m curious what you think.”

“Do you collect intentionally or because something strikes you at the moment?”

“I’m choosy, but more because I have limited room to display pieces than lack of those which capture my interest.”

Kelly wandered through the room, absorbing the breadth of what he had acquired over the years. “I have to admit, it would be a hard choice between the horses and the flowers as to which is my favorite.” When she finally settled on the sofa, she smiled across at him. “Thank you. I can’t remember the last time I had a night of art. It has been a pleasure.”

Charles unwrapped a piece of hard candy. “That painting you were admiring? The flowers? I stole it when I was nineteen.”

The hurt in her expression he had expected, but it still hit him hard. “You see me as a rich man you’re not quite sure how to deal with. I don’t see myself the same way. I was a thief when my wife met me.” He tried to put some perspective on it as he tried to put it in the past. “A charming thief, but still a thief. She knew and she still thought I could be reformed.”

She said nothing for such a long time. Her animation had ended. “You told me you grew up poor.”

“Trying to excuse my behavior? Thank you, but it’s okay. Being a thief is like being a reformed alcoholic, Kelly. You’re a reformed thief, but still a thief.”

“Why are you telling me this? Why tonight?”

“Because I would rather have you know me for some of who I really am than feel a distance over what I have and what that allows me to do.”

“I still like you, Charles. I understand having to redeem a past.”

He gestured around him. “You’ll get used to all the stuff, Kelly. It’s just stuff.”

“You don’t look like a thief.”

“I was quite a good one, actually. It started when I was a child: Being a thief was how I could fit in a world that laughed at me because of the poverty. I stole to have what I needed to fit in, but after a while I did it because I could.

“Amy said I stole her heart, and it was quite apropos. She stole mine. It came down to a choice—between that passage in 1 Corinthians that says no thief will enter heaven or the thief on the cross next to Jesus who repented. Amy asked me which kind of thief I was going to be. It cut. And I changed. I became her reformed thief.

“I bought the painting by the way. I tracked down the original owners and said it had come into my possession. I offered to give it back or buy it. Amy considered that painting my reminder of how far God could bring someone. It’s the only thing I’ve ever stolen that I’ve kept.”

Kelly found he was right; the information changed everything she assumed about him. “How did you ever get to be working with security matters with that in your background?”

“Actually, it turned out to be quite useful. I could sneak around the less savory side of Hong Kong gathering information, and when anyone got suspicious and checked me out, they found out I was a thief because I really was. Amy’s father pulled the initial strings to get me clearance, and after I had a track record, it evolved from there.”

“Your candor about this is surprising.”

“Then let me grant you another surprise. I was sad to hear that you and Joe parted ways. It’s obvious you two are close.”

Kelly relaxed at those words. “Who told you?”

“Someone who noticed Joe was growling. If you ever find yourself at a loose end while you’re waiting for him to get his head on straight, call me. I can at least make sure he has something to be jealous about.”

His offer was unexpected. Charles was having a good time with the situation, even if he was taking care to let her know he understood where she was at. “We’ve just hit a bump in the road. But thanks for the offer. I may take you up on it someday.”

“Do. I want you happy, Kelly. And I enjoy your company.”

When he took her home at the end of the evening and walked her to her door, she was surprised at how much she didn’t want to say good night. “Thank you, Charles. I had a wonderful evening.”

“So did I.” He didn’t try to make it anything more than a smile when he said good night.

Kelly closed the door after him, deep in thought. Charles was a very charming man, and his patience coupled with that were a potent combination. A thief. She smiled at the realization that he could be so honest about his own secrets. She really had to find a friend to introduce him to. She liked him too much not to have him with someone who would appreciate how special he was.

Kelly carefully hung up the dress.

When she slipped into bed that night, she looked at the phone. As lovely as the evening had been, Charles and the fun she had slid easily aside while Joe was an ache inside that didn’t fade.

She missed Joe.

She really missed Joe.

She reached over, picked up the phone, and dialed familiar numbers. Joe’s phone rang until the answering machine picked up.

Joe, I’m ready to talk and you aren’t there. Where are you?

Kelly bit her lip and set down the phone without leaving a message.

* * *

He had to tell Kelly about how Nick died.

The stars were shining overhead late Friday night. Joe had done as the wilderness campers did, left to take twenty-four hours alone in the wilderness with God. He was bringing his relationship with Kelly to the One who could help him figure out what to do.

The grief will hit her hard, Lord, and I’m dreading the change that will be in her eyes when she looks at me. Nick died because I got hurt. It’s time Kelly knows the truth, but it is going to be so hard to tell her.

Did he want to lose her? That was what he was risking. Charles was waiting in the wings, ready and willing to step forward and offer Kelly not only a future but also a ready-made family. Joe couldn’t blame her for liking Charles and Ryan.

What do I do?

The only way to square things with Kelly was to tell her all of it. She needed to know. Nick had died saving his life. Even if that meant he risked her thinking his interest now and over the years had been from survivor’s guilt. He owed her the truth.

And he needed to repay that debt—to one day get Raider and bring him to justice. Leaving the SEALs wasn’t an option for him. And Kelly deserved a husband and a family. She shouldn’t be alone. Either he stepped forward and made that final commitment or he let her go.

He didn’t want to lose her.

There was no way out of this conflict. He would be asking her to delay children, asking her to live with the risk of him possibly not coming home from a mission. He loved her. It was time to tell her that and let her make the decision.

Thirty

* * *

The church was packed, and most men and a few of the women were in uniform, prepared for the Memorial Day weekend Sunday service. Joe walked quietly among friends, touching base, checking in with his men, many who called this church their home, to see how they were coping after a few days off.

He had returned from the wilderness trip with a resolve deep inside to deal with the situation as he found it. What he wanted and what might now be possible were different things. He had yet to find Kelly although he knew she was here somewhere. Joe made his way through the commons area looking for her in the crowd.

“Joe, could I talk to you for a minute?” Ryan asked. The teen looked unusually serious for someone who a few minutes ago had been talking with Lynnette and the others from the wilderness camp.

“Of course.”

“Maybe outside?”

Joe raised an eyebrow but nodded his head toward the side door. What was going on? He followed the boy outside. The parking lot was full. On Kelly’s behalf, he was grateful for that show of support. “What’s up, Ry?”

The teen pulled a folded cloth from his jacket pocket. “Would you give this back to Kelly?”

Joe was stunned when Ryan unwrapped a cloth and handed him Nick’s eagle. “Ryan—”

“Please. Don’t tell Dad.”

Joe suddenly had to face the fact the teen he thought he knew he didn’t know at all. His anger flared because of what Ryan had done to Kelly, at all the time that had been spent searching to find that medallion, at all the pain Kelly had felt knowing it was lost. “You need to give this to her yourself.”

“I can’t.”

“Look at me.” Joe waited until the boy raised his head. “You took it; you have to give it back.”

Ryan dropped his eyes, but not before Joe saw the tears. “I can’t. I’m sorry I let you down,” he whispered.

Joe needed the kid to grow up and face what he had done, yet at the same time he knew the contrition was real. “Why did you take it?”

The boy straightened his back and took a deep breath. “It was there.”

It had the ring of truth.

“I’ll give it back to her,” Joe finally replied. “If you tell your father.”

Ryan slowly nodded. “Okay.” The boy turned back toward the church.

“Ryan.”

The boy turned.

“A SEAL doesn’t steal,” Joe said quietly.

The rebuke hit the boy hard. “Yes, sir. I know.”

* * *

The memorial service had already begun, and Joe saw Kelly sitting with Liz near the front of the sanctuary. He had hoped to be beside her, but she had not saved a place for him as usual. That hurt. Didn’t she want him to come? Had he messed up things between them that badly?

He felt the medallion in his pocket. It was going to be a tough day for her, in more ways than she realized. He found a place in the back.

It was a service that focused on the call of duty, of the call God placed on Christians to follow Him no matter what the cost. His friend in the pulpit delivering the message could have no idea how close that message came to his reality. Joe couldn’t see Kelly from where he sat and he really wished he could. Was his first duty to his country or to his friend? There were times the truth was not all that clear. Saying
I’m sorry
wasn’t sufficient to convey what he felt.

He moved toward Kelly at the end of the service as she stood surrounded by friends.

“Joe.” She turned toward him, her smile somewhat sad, and reached for a hug. This was a day of memories like no other.

“Hi, friend,” he whispered. “I’ve missed you.” He was incredibly relieved at the hug she offered. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I know.” She reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze. “Friends?”

In one quiet word, she set aside days of hurt and uncertainty. It felt so good to have her hand once again in his. “Always.”

Joe took a chance and interlaced their fingers rather than release her hand. He didn’t want their relationship to revert all the way back to just friends, but at the moment he was relieved she was offering at least that. He had missed her. And the thought of how much he had lost settled on him like a heavy weight. There wasn’t a relaxed openness anymore; her face was strained and tired. He wished he could wipe that away.

“Walk with me down to the graveside service?”

Joe nodded. The cemetery was covered with small flags honoring the fallen heroes, placed there by servicemen that morning. She carried another one for Nick’s grave.

It was a short, simple service, given greater impact by the fact they had to walk past almost a hundred SEALs in full dress uniform assembling to pay their respects.

When it concluded, Kelly placed her flag. She stood for a moment before the simple white headstone. His own memories made tears burn behind his eyes.

She stepped back from the grave and her shoulders squared. When she joined him, her eyes were bright and clear. “Let’s go.”

Only after she had passed by did the men begin to disperse.

“Come back to my place, Kelly. We need to talk.”

She looked at him and he was afraid for one moment that she would refuse, and he couldn’t blame her if she did. He was relieved when she nodded and didn’t ask him what it was about.

She was quiet on the drive to his home, and he looked over at her several times. The sadness was there, and the quiet resolve to get through the day.