Unexpected (21 page)

Eli couldn't hide his small smile. “Has it been so horrible, honey?”

“You're damn right, it has. I stay sick all the time, and I'm tired and my boobs hurt and my ankles are swollen and—” She stopped suddenly, her lips compressed as if she'd only then realized how she complained.

He wanted to hold her, to tell her to cry if she needed to. He started to tell her he loved her and would take care of her. But he knew such a sentiment would be abhorrent for Ray, so he quickly changed the subject.

“My grandfather was ill with pneumonia when I got home. It was pretty serious for a while there. I couldn't leave him, but I had people searching for you. The damned agency wouldn't give me a single hint about your location so I had to search every small town in Illinois.”

“The agency protects me by keeping things private.”

“I understand that. But it wasn't easy. I should have known you'd live in the most inconspicuous place imaginable. I'm not even sure it's on the map.”

“You were really looking for me?”

She sounded uncertain, keeping him off guard. “Isn't that what I just said?” He squeezed her hand. “Lady, I about went nuts when I couldn't find you right away. I went from swearing I was going to make love to you all night, to wanting to lock you in a windowless room so you'd never get away from me again. I may as well tell you, it's still a toss-up.”

Ray didn't take that threat seriously. “How's your grandfather now?”

“Anxious for me to bring you home so he can meet the woman who's had me so distracted. It's not something he's used to. There was so damned much to do, tending him, breaking off the business arrangement with Jane, making certain Jeremy was settled. And all I could think about was you.”

Ray affected a look of casual interest, though Eli saw through the ruse easily enough. “How did Jane take the news?”

“She still thinks our families should unite.” He smiled. “I thought about siccing her on Jeremy, since he's been behaving like such an ass. Would serve them both right.”

Ray licked her lips. “You may have jumped the gun here.” She didn't meet his gaze, choosing instead to stare at her hands while she petted the dog. “I'm still not interested in a relationship.”

It was in Ray's nature to put up one last grandstand. Eli didn't begrudge her the effort, but he had her and he wasn't letting her go. He already knew it, and he imagined Ray did, too.

Matt came back in with a tray. “I brought the tea and the soup. Usually once she eats a bit, it settles her stomach. I think working in that stupid restaurant is what really nauseates her. But she won't listen to me.”

“I finished that job today, so quit harping.”

“I was thinking about your work,” Eli told her, while moving the dog from her lap. He ignored her incredulous expression when all Precious did was wag his stubby tail in seeming joy, then plop down across Eli's feet.

After Ray scooted up to sit against the headboard, he placed the tray across her legs. “Why don't you teach self-defense or something? You'd be really good at it.”

Matt chuckled. “She tried that once.”

“Being my brother won't save you, Matt.”

Matt just winked at her. “She even worked for the cops. But they kept sending her women to train and the women kept running off in tears. Ray here isn't all that good at tempering her strength or showing any sympathy with broken nails or messed up hair.”

Imagining the whole scenario, Eli grinned. “Prissy women, huh?”

“Regular
women,” Matt claimed, “and not up to Ray's intensity.” He leaned toward Eli in a conspiratorial way. “She had them all whining and crying within minutes.”

“I can see where that might make things difficult.”

Ray's expression had gone from embarrassed to annoyed to chagrined. “Why are we congregated in my bedroom? I'm feeling fine now. Let's go downstairs to eat.”

Eli and Matt said, “No,” at the same time.

“Not until we're certain you won't faint again.” Eli handed her a spoon and sat back to wait while she ate her soup.

“I won't faint.”

Gently, Eli told her, “I'm not sure that's a promise you can keep, honey.”

Ray gave an exasperated sigh at his insistence, then relented. Eli thought she must surely be exhausted to keep giving up so easily.

He waited until she had a spoonful of soup in her mouth, then said, “I have a suggestion. One for you both to consider.”

Matt looked interested, but said nothing. Ray tried to ignore him.

“Come to my ranch with me. Ray can get plenty of fresh air and some much needed rest, and you can both get to know my family. They're dying to meet you.”

Ray promptly choked.

V
ery casually, Eli leaned forward to pat Ray on the back. He pretended not to understand the source of her distress. “Don't gulp your soup, Ray.” Then he settled back in his chair and continued. “My grandfather is back home now, and my grandmother and Jeremy, of course. You won't find a place more conducive to rest, and the weather is beautiful this time of year. You could—”

“No.”

Eli gave her a level look. “Why not?”

“Because . . . because . . .” She looked at her brother in near desperation. “Matt and I both have jobs. We can't just take off whenever we please.”

Quietly, Eli contemplated the problem before giving his attention to Matt. “You're going to college soon?”

“This fall.”

He nodded. “The men who work for me make good wages. It isn't easy work, but if you're interested, I can always use another hand. You can put in as many or as few hours as you like. It would be up to you.”

Matt flicked a glance at Ray. Again, Eli noted the strong family resemblance between them. They shared the same dark eyes and hair, the same high cheekbones and stubborn chin. But where Ray seemed intensely purposeful most of the time, Matt had a natural geniality about him. Eli imagined Ray had done much to see that Matt maintained that carefree attitude—at her own expense.

Ray put her spoon on her tray. “It doesn't matter if Matt agrees. I still have a job to think about.”

Eli hated pushing her when she wasn't up to snuff, but this was too important. “You also have a baby to consider. Look at yourself, Ray. You're exhausted and as pale as your sheets. You need to take care of yourself right now.”

“I've always done just that, Eli. On my own. And without your help.”

“Agreed. But now you have my baby—
our baby
—to think of, too.” He stood next to the bed and looked down at her. “So you'll have my help, whether you want it or not.”

“Is that so?”

He leaned down, caging her in with his arms. “I'm not going away, Ray. I don't know what it's going to take to convince you, but whatever it is, I'll find it.”

Ray tightened her mouth mutinously. Then she suddenly blurted, “Your brother doesn't like me.”

Incredulous, Eli straightened. “For God's sake, he doesn't even know you. I can't believe you'd be offended by anything he said when you knew what he'd just been through. He sure as hell wasn't himself, and your introduction wasn't under the best of circumstances.” Eli shook his head. “I want you to marry me, Ray.”

Her eyes looked ready to fall out of her head. “Marry you?” The words were little more than a horrified whisper. “But . . . why?”

Eli's thoughts scrambled for credible arguments. “I can help with Matt's college bills.”

The color returned to her face in a rush. “We pay our own bills.”

“Don't sound so damned offended. As my wife, you and your family would become my concern, so they'd be my bills, too. Matt would have a good job in the summer, and attend college the rest of the time.”

“I can take care of Matt on my own.”

Matt made a rude sound. “You two make me sound like an infant who needs to be taken care of.”

“Speaking of infants, you
are
having my baby.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Yeah, at this point, marriage isn't going to change anything.”

Exasperated, Eli snapped, “I care about you, damn it.”

There were three beats of silence before Ray replied. “You never said so before.”

“Hell, Ray, you kept telling me to get lost. I wasn't sure you'd want to hear it.”

Matt cleared his throat. “I wouldn't mind going with Eli. You're not the only one who likes to use his hands, you know. I do, too. What he's offering sounds better than working at the mall, which is about the only summer job I could get. And you did say you finished your carpentry job today . . .” At the expression she aimed his way, he rushed to add, “But naturally, it's up to you.”

Ray sighed.

“I have to go out for a while,” Matt said with sudden decisiveness. “Don't, ah, expect me until late. Okay?” He picked up the dog and started out the door.

“We'll leave early in the morning,” Eli called after him. “I'd give you more time, but I need to get back for my grandfather.”

Matt nodded.

Scowling, Ray said, “Matt, wait. Nothing's been decided . . .”

He was already gone, the door closed softly behind him. Eli blew out a deep breath. One down, one to go.

The love Ray felt for her brother, the protectiveness, was plain to see, and Eli decided to use that to his advantage. “You should consider Matt before making a decision, Ray. Don't you think he'll feel better knowing you're well taken care of? I saw how he dotes on you. He's worried.”

“I know.” Ray tilted her head back in frustration, then viciously punched the mattress next to her hip. That didn't appease her and she hit it again, then twice more.

“Feel better?”

“No,” she snarled.

Knowing victory was imminent, Eli hid his satisfaction and reseated himself beside her. He removed the tray before she spilled it and took her hands in his, rubbing her knuckles until she relaxed, loosening her fists, then he kissed each palm.

It was time to get serious, and to do some apologizing. “What happened in the hotel . . . it was my fault. I should have thought of protection, but it never occurred to me. And that's strange because I've always been careful.”

She shrugged. “Me, too. And it wasn't all your fault. I remember being there, Eli, a willing participant.”

Always honest. She pleased him so damn much. “Very willing. But that doesn't excuse me. At the time, all I could think of was showing you how much I cared.” He touched her cheek. “I really do, you know.”

Ray shied away from his declaration. “Here I thought maybe it was the comfort of a real bed.”

“With you, I'm finding time and place doesn't matter. In the jungle, that ratty little hut out in the middle of nowhere, it all seemed . . . I don't know. Surreal.” He would have said magical, beautiful, incredible—but he didn't want to push her more than he already had. “At the hotel, I already knew you were planning to skip out on me. I felt it.”

Ray looked uncomfortable at that. “You're too damned astute.” And she grumbled, “I'm sorry.”

He acknowledged that with a nod. “I'd like to make love to you in my bed, without worrying about bats or guerillas. I'd like to love you knowing you'll still be there in the morning, that you don't want to leave.”

Her bottom lip started to quiver, totally unmanning him. “Ray.” He scooted closer to her on the bed, pulled her into his side. “Honey, I know it's a little late to be asking you this, but how do you feel about having the baby?”

Her throat worked as she swallowed. She shook her head.

He frowned over her distressed expression. “I don't know what that means, babe. Talk to me.”

She looked up at him. “What do I know about having babies or being a parent? I scare grown men, Eli. Matt wasn't joking about those women running off in tears just because I tried to instruct them. Can you imagine what I'd do to a kid?”

Eli felt caught between a laugh and suffocating tenderness. He pulled Ray into a hug, rocking her. “Everything will be all right, Ray. Trust me.”

“You don't understand.” Her voice was shaky and self-derisive. “Look at me, Eli. I'm a thirty-one-year-old part-time mercenary and carpenter. What a joke.”

“You're a beautiful, sensitive woman.”

Her laugh was raw, heartbreaking. “I don't have anything to teach a kid except how to protect himself and how to survive, and given a choice, I don't want
any
kid to have to worry about stuff like that.”

Eli squeezed her tighter. “Those are important things to learn. But you're wrong when you say that's all you know.” He caught her chin and brought her face up to his. “You know honesty and honor, pride, integrity, and the value of hard work. You, Ray Vereker, are going to be an excellent mother.”

Ray blinked at him before laughing. “Did you fall off another planet, Eli? Because you sure as hell don't have your feet planted firmly in this one. And you don't talk like a rich man, either. What's all this about hard work? I thought your type disdained that sort of thing.”

“One of these days, you're going to really piss me off, Ray, do you know that?” Though he knew she resorted to insults to distance herself, it still bothered him. He stood to pace restlessly around the room, finally stopping before a high window. Keeping his back to Ray, he said, “There are a few things you don't know about me. Since you'll soon be my wife and the mother of my child, maybe it's time you did.”

She scooted up higher in the bed. “I didn't agree to the wife part, but I'm all ears.”

Eli turned to face her. “I'll make this as short and uncomplicated as I can.”

“I'm not going anywhere.”

“I never knew my father, Ray.” She didn't look shocked or judgmental, just curious. “He married my mother against my grandfather's wishes, and they ran off together. My grandparents still loved him, but they'd argued and . . .he became estranged from the family.” Eli shoved his hands into his pockets and starting pacing again. He hated rehashing old news, and if Ray hadn't persisted in trying to make him out as some wealthy snob, he might not have told her. At least, not yet. “My mother hadn't counted on that because, just as my grandfather predicted, she'd married him for his money, not out of love. It didn't take my father long to realize my grandfather was right. She was . . . immoral, to say the least.”

“How so?”

Eli shook his head and stared beyond her. “They divorced and my father went home,
before
my mother told him about me.”

She straightened in the bed. “Eli, I swear, I would have told you—”

He smiled to reassure her. “You're nothing like her, Ray, I know that. You would never use a baby. But I can remember my mother laughing about it, saying she'd duped him and that soon she'd cash in. She said I'd take my rightful place in the family and there wasn't anything they could do about it. She made no bones about the fact that I'd be a pawn. Hell, she loved it.”

“That's awful.” She placed her hands protectively over her belly, and it pleased him. “So did she finally introduce you to your family?”

“I don't think she quite had the nerve. Whenever she drank she'd make plans, but when she sobered up, she wouldn't mention it.”

“She was an alcoholic?”

Inside his pockets, where it wouldn't show, Eli's hands curled into fists. “She wasn't really a drunk so much as a partier. I can remember one man after another trooping through. We lived with some of them, sometimes we lived in trailers, and once at a women's shelter.”

“But Jeremy . . . ?”

“Is my half brother. My father remarried and they had Jeremy and were very happy together, from what I've been told. They died in a car wreck before I could ever meet them.”

“Then you must have introduced yourself to your grandparents on your own.” She gave Eli a look of admiration. “That had to be tough.”

He laughed with self-derision. “It wasn't like that, honey. When I contacted them, it was with the intent of using them, just as my mother had always planned. You see, she'd long since washed her hands of me. She disappeared completely when I was seventeen. I just . . . I came home one day and she was gone. Not that I should have been surprised. She told me she'd leave if I didn't stay out of trouble.”

Softly, Ray asked, “And you didn't?”

“Hell, no. If anything, it seemed I got worse, until finally I was arrested for hurting a guy during a brawl. I spent two days in county jail because I didn't have anyone to call or any way to make bail.” His eyes searched her face, looking for some sign of what she thought, how she took his news.

“Why'd you hurt him?”

“Who?”

“The guy in the brawl.”

“Oh.” Eli didn't know why it mattered to her, but he said, “He was drunk and a bully and he was picking on this skinny little guy—”

Ray grinned. “I see. So you called your grandfather?”

“Not exactly. I'd been in trouble before with juvenile authorities, mostly just pranks, but I knew this time it would probably be bad. I decided I had nothing to lose, so I tried looking up my father.”

Ray leaned forward on the bed, curling her legs beneath her and listening intently to Eli. “What happened?”

“My grandfather showed up instead. And let me tell you something about Granddad, no one uses him.” Eli relaxed with that memory, smiling with genuine affection. “He took one look at me, saw a family resemblance, and claimed me as a Connors.”

Ray nodded. “Smart man.”

“So damn smart, it's scary. His bones are weaker now, but his mind is still razor sharp.” He settled his most somber gaze on Ray. “You think my grandfather must be a snob because he's wealthy. But he went through the Depression a poor man. Everything he has, he earned the old-fashioned way—by nearly working himself into the grave. He's a self-made man and even though his attitudes tend to be hard in some ways, he's always fair.”

“Was he hard on you?”

Grinning, Eli said, “He was a mean son of a bitch at first, but then so was I, and we fought all the time. He didn't put up with anything. Before I knew it I was sitting at a table for three meals a day, because Granddad said my grandmother expected it and he wouldn't let me disappoint her. When I wasn't in school, he had me working by his side at the ranch until I was so exhausted, I didn't have the energy to get into trouble. He also bought me my first horse, and my first car.”