Unforgivably Broken (The Broken Series Book Two) (36 page)

“Thank you, Mother,” I said through my teeth, unable to help the way my eyes blurred. No matter how old I was, it seemed
that the disapproval of my parents burned me to my soul. I turned away, ducking my head before moving into the living room, hoping Denni and Kaitlyn were around for a buffer.

Dinner was a quiet affair, consisting mostly of Kaitlyn and
Denni trying to keep up conversation with Zane, who was sitting at the far end of the table. He hadn’t spoken a single word to me since we were outside and though I knew I shouldn’t care because I wouldn’t know what to believe, it still ached.

F
eel completely alone in a room full of people who should all love you was excruciating.

“Excuse me,” I whispered automatically, an ingrained habit
. Jumping from the table, I rushed up the stairs to the farthest bathroom in the house, slamming the door behind me. I leaned against it for a moment until I caught sight of myself in the mirror. I was slightly disheveled, most likely from unknowingly toying with my hair.

Walking to the counter, I stared at the girl looking back. What the hell was happening to me? I was a fucking mess and I was sick of letting it all get the best of me. I wasn’t that girl anymore. Kylee was dead, just as I’d told Lydia. Without thinking, I slammed my fist into her face in the glass. Once, twice, three times
, until spider webbing cracks spread beneath my fist.

“Do you feel better?”

I spun to the door, realizing I’d forgotten to lock it as Denni stepped in.

“Not really. Although Lydia will probably pass out when she sees the damage so that actually does lift my mood a little,” I answered honestly, trying to smile.

“Let’s see
your
damage,” she reached for my hand, turning on the water and running my knuckles under the stream. There were only a few small cuts, none of which looked bad enough to need stitches.

“Did they shit themselves when I ran from the table?” I asked
, keeping my eyes trained on my hand.

“He tried to come after you but your father stopped him. They went into his study,” she replied softly, grabbing for a
Band-Aid from the medicine cabinet. She knew me well enough to know I was asking about Zane. Once she covered the largest cut with the bandage, she kissed it like she used to when I was younger, making me smile. “Look, I don’t know what’s going on with you and him but…” she paused, shaking her head at me when I tried to speak, “that boy loves you, honey. You two are connected in a way that most people only dream about. From what you’ve told me about him and what I’ve seen myself, it’s obvious. Whatever problems you have can be worked out. Let him help you. Let him heal you.”

I couldn’t help the small sob that escaped and she pulled me into her arms for a moment. Hearing it from her — the woman I wanted to be when I grew up — made it hurt even more. “He lied to me. He keeps lying to me. I don’t know how to get past it.”

She sat back, running her fingers under my eyes to stop my tears and fixing my hair as she spoke. “What did he lie about?”

“It shouldn’t matter.”

“It does matter. The reason behind it is important. No relationship can be completely open. We all deserve our moments of privacy. Otherwise, you’ll miss out on the beautiful surprises that can come from those moments.”

“He hid the fact that he was letting his son see his ex, with him present, while I was here.” I hated how petty it sounded when I explained it to someone else. I felt my anger start to slip. “And he promised once I found out that he wouldn’t lie
anymore, but he did it again. He told me he came here because he missed me and wished he was here to begin with but I found out that the guy that shot him was possibly spotted entering the state. That’s the real reason he came.”

“Oh, honey,” she sighed, grabbing for the tissues on the counter as she continued trying to make me presentable
. My eyes threatened to ruin her work once again. “It sounds to me like he’s determined to protect you from being hurt when he can. That’s not a bad quality in a man. It’s the kind of quality that makes a man take a bullet to keep you safe.”

The tears dropped onto my cheeks as she leaned in, brushing them away again. She turned me to face the mirror
. Standing behind me, she put her chin on top of my head. I stared at my reflection again, the way the crack caused a distortion in the girl looking back. “This part of you that keeps thinking of yourself as the broken little girl, it’s inside you. You’re the only one who can take it away. He wants to help heal you as much as you want to heal him. You see him as whole, don’t you?” I nodded, my brows scrunching as I took in her words. “He sees you the same way. He’s trying to do what’s right. Relationships always require a learning curve. You two haven’t had the most conventional of beginnings. It’s been a series of rough times. You have been through more in the first few months of your relationship than most people go through in the first several years. Give it a chance, okay?”

With a deep breath, I nodded, taking her advice to heart. She was right. This was one of several reasons I’d missed her all these years.

She left me alone to finish composing myself but after a few anxious minutes, I remembered her words. Jefferson had taken Zane to his study. That meant he was probably talking to him and that was something I
never
wanted to happen. Zane never needed to hear whatever my father was saying to him. My parents were and always had been heartless people who wouldn’t give two shits about tearing down a man they don’t know. Add that to our fight tonight… and what? Zane’s last words to me rang in my mind as I tried not to stomp down the stairs in my boots.

“Let’s just get this over with.”

What was
this
? Was it the dinner? My stomach twisted with the thought of other possibilities. It had to be the dinner. He couldn’t honestly think I was going to end things. But, at the time, wasn’t that exactly what I was thinking would happen? My hand trembled on the rail of the stairs as I reached the bottom. I could hear Kaitlyn and Denni laughing in the living room but I turned, heading down the hallway to my father’s study.

“From what I’ve seen, between the footage I tried to bury from this fight and what my lawyers have found on you, I’d say my daughter needs to be kept as far from you as possible. You can’t honestly believe
it’s right to pull her into all of this.” Jefferson’s voice stopped me in my tracks outside the door. It was cracked and the sound of shuffling papers had me peering around, trying to see what was happening before I entered. “You’re just like the trash you came from and Kylee deserves much better than that.”

Zane’s back was to me, stiff as he shifted through the papers in his hand. He threw them back on the desk. “You think I don’t know exactly where I came from? I lived
it, I don’t need papers to remind me. Anywhere in all your research about me, did you find that the child you spoke of earlier, my son, isn’t even biologically mine? No? That’s right, my wife had an ongoing affair with my best friend that produced a child. I found out when my son was two but I’ve
never
held that against him. He’s mine. And yes, the lack of positive role models in my childhood could’ve ruined me. Hell, it could’ve ruined Lili, too, for that matter. But honestly, I’ve spent too much of my life trying to convince better men than you that I’m a good man. Myself included. So, with all due respect…” Zane paused, taking a breath and shaking his head. “No, I won’t even pretend that I respect you. In fact, I find it amusing that you think
I’m
not good enough for your daughter when I’ve done nothing but love and protect that girl. It almost cost me my life, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.
You
, on the other hand, chose status and money over putting a criminal who nearly destroyed your own child behind bars. In the end, that decision cost you your daughter and ultimately cost another girl her life. So tell me, who doesn’t deserve Lili?”

My hand was covering my mouth, containing the sob that wanted to break free as I watched Zane’s back heave with heavy breaths. After everything I’d said to him, the way I’d acted, here he was, standing up for me to a man that I never had the courage to stand up to myself.

“She deserves the world, everything she could ever want. And while I may not have the means financially, it’s not the material things in life she wants. I intend to give her everything I have. And I couldn’t give a fuck less what you have to say about it,” Zane said, turning before I had a chance to move. He froze when he saw me through the crack in the door, his expression shocked for a moment before he continued. He opened the door, immediately pulling me into his arms.

“You have to forgive me,” he whispered into my hair. “I don’t care if I have to spend every day of the rest of my life proving to you that you can trust me, I’ll do it. But one day
, you’ll have to forgive me. I won’t give up, Pixie. Not on us. Not ever.”

Slipping my hands around his waist, I clung to him, letting his presence alone remind me of all the things I knew to be true
. He loves me. He would give his life for me. He needs me.

“Get me out of here. Please?” I begged, wishing I’d never even come to begin with. I wanted to erase most of this night, forget that it ever happened. I felt his relief before he even sighed into my hair.

“I love you,” he said, kissing the top of my head before pulling away. He didn’t wrap an arm around me the way he had been since he arrived in Texas. He’d somehow lost that edge that made me feel like he thought I was going to fall apart. Instead, he took my hand, entwining our fingers as he guided me toward the front of the house.

Lying with Lili asleep in my arms was and always would be some of the most peaceful moments of my life. Currently, she was fighting that last drop into a deep sleep, giving little gasps occasionally that kept my hands slowly stroking along her skin to soothe her. Every time I fell asleep, I worried that she would have a nightmare, but there was nothing I could do to help her aside from what I was doing now. Or so she said.

When we’d left her parents
’ house, she’d gotten a call from the prosecutor. Tomorrow they would be closing the gallery to all viewers. They would allow the jury, the judge, both attorneys, and Hunter to watch the video. Lili declined when he said she could be in the room if she chose. I couldn’t blame her. I was glad she wouldn’t have to relive it in a video, especially with that fucker in the room.

Following the video, the two attorneys would give their closing arguments and they suspected that by late afternoon
, the jury would go into deliberations. Most likely, in the next twenty-four hours, this would be over.

And tomorrow, since we would be notified when the verdict was in and we could go back to the courthouse then, I was putting my plan into action. I hadn’t realized until I was talking to
Denni and Kaitlyn that Lili and I hadn’t had anything that could constitute as an actual date. It was a huge oversight on my part, which I was using my new connections to rectify.

Lili’s
eyes suddenly flashed open and she sat straight up, nearly slamming her head into mine.

“Whoa
. Easy, Pix. I’m right here,” I said soothingly. I was getting used to her nightmares now and while this one definitely wasn’t one of the worst I’d seen, I hated anything that had her waking in a panic.

“Zane,” she choked out, curling into me and burying her face in my chest. She was shivering but she didn’t seem to be crying this time.
At least, not yet.