Unmasked (Revealed #1) (30 page)

Like quit my job.

My eyebrows rose at that thought. It wasn’t like I needed the money. The series of action films I’d done in my early career had actually made me enough money to easily live on for the rest of my life. I could quit now and never have another financial worry ever again. With the way I felt right now, it was a seriously tempting notion. I wasn’t entirely convinced that Allie would be thrilled at having my neurotic arse at her side twenty-four seven though. In fact, I was so completely infatuated by her that I’d probably end up pushing her away with the overwhelming strength of my feelings.

When I looked at it that way, perhaps it was best if I went back to work. I was so out of my depth with regards to how strongly I felt for her that actually, the distance could work in my favour and help me normalise my emotions a bit, level off the way I acted so possessively around her, and set us up for a more stable long-term relationship.

Long-term was good, that was what I wanted. And needed, with Allie.

Nodding my head decisively, I rubbed at my sore knuckles and then rolled my neck to relax the tense muscles bunching there. OK. I could do this, I could leave her in the UK and head off back to America and back to work. It was the right thing to do. Besides, it was only temporary.

As I focused on slowing my breathing I winced as I thought again about the way I had taken her this morning so roughly, and not even with protection. I felt like an utter shit, because truthfully, I had remembered my lack of a condom just before I came, but some crazy, primitive part of me had wanted, no,
needed
, to somehow mark Allie as mine before I left, so I hadn’t pulled out. That made me a prize bastard, didn’t it? It was fucking crazy the way she made me act.
I
was fucking crazy. God, Allie deserved so much better than me.

Had I wanted to get her pregnant? Wincing, I shook my head and ran a hand through my hair. Maybe. Who knew? I barely felt like my head was screwed on straight anymore. Huffing out a sharp breath, I shook my head, hoping to shake some sense back into it. From her statement of ‘I’ll get it sorted’ I assumed she meant the morning after pill, so pregnancy didn’t look like it would be a probability. As crazy as it seemed, I couldn’t decide how I felt about that.

As much as I wanted to hide away and try to clear my head where Allie was concerned, I couldn’t. In fact, if I sat here at the side of the road for much longer, then I’d be in serious danger of missing my flight this afternoon.

Reluctantly starting the car again I pulled out into traffic, still with my mind stuffy and full of images and feelings relating to my girl, but suddenly a scowl fell onto my brows as I thought about my impending trip. First a flight to London where I would kill a few hours and then eleven plus hours cramped on a fucking plane back to the sun and supposed glitz of LA.

In my early career, I had loved the excitement of days like this; packing up my suitcase and flying off to the glamour and easy living lifestyle that America offered to young actors like me. I literally wanted for nothing when I was there, whatever I requested would be promptly delivered: speciality food, made-to-order drinks, women … you name it. I could get it if I wanted it. Not that I took advantage of these perks of my job – not any more, anyway.

As well as flying back to America, I would be travelling back to Savannah Hilton, my co-star, and one of the most demanding women I had ever met in the business. I had no doubt that she frequently took advantage of her famous status, as she was prone to throwing tantrums at the drop of a hat whenever she didn’t get her own way.

Seeing as she was also on a constant quest to get me to sleep with her I was sure she’d be just thrilled to hear that I now had a girlfriend. Sighing, I shook my head and tried to focus on the road ahead. That would be an interesting conversation, that was for sure.

TWENTY

Allie

I stared at the dark curtains of my bedroom, wondering how long it would be until I could see any faint tinges of morning light seeping through them. Hours probably. I daren’t even look at the clock yet. It was probably only one or two o’clock in the morning, which would mean a depressingly long time until I needed to get up. Releasing a long, weary breath, I ran a hand over my face, trying to push away the feeling of exhaustion clinging to my skin.

After Sean had left yesterday I had kept myself busy planning some of my modules for school and had ended up staying up late in the hope that exhaustion might help me sleep. It hadn’t. I’d barely slept a wink and was already awake again.

After spending huge amounts of time with Sean over the past four and a bit weeks, I’d quickly become accustomed to his presence in my house, and as a result, yesterday afternoon and evening had seemed eerily quiet, not to mention depressingly snuggle-free. He might be a little over the top with his constant contact and caring, but I already dreadfully missed the attention from Sean. And now, there would be no being woken up twenty minutes before the alarm for a cuddle or sexy time either. All in all, my life had become rather boring, rather quickly.

Even wearing Sean’s T-shirt all afternoon hadn’t really helped much, apart from to distract me from work because I kept sniffing at the fabric like some weird, scent-obsessed stalker. In bed, I’d continued the trend and buried my face in the pillow he’d used, inhaling the lovely, spicy, smoky smell that remained, but instead of helping me get to sleep it just seemed to remind me of his absence.

Blurgh. This was rubbish. Flopping onto my back I wondered if Sean was having any of the same withdrawal symptoms. Probably not, he was no doubt too busy sliding back into his star-studded lifestyle of cameras, screaming fans, and sunshine. Although, actually, given how long the flight time was, he was probably still on the plane. Sighing, I sat up, finally giving up all attempts at sleep and decided to get a coffee to drink in bed.

This morning was so early that it really called for an extra pick-me-up, so I opted to grind some fresh beans for my coffee to make it a little more special. Poking my nose into the bag of Columbian beans, I pulled in a deep breath, the familiar smell immediately making me smile. These were the same brand that Sean used, purchased by him last week when my supply had dwindled from the presence of two coffee junkies co-habiting in my little house. As it was Sean’s favourite, I knew that it was also going to be the brand I bought from now on.

Once I had brewed and poured my morning coffee kick I climbed back upstairs, snuggled myself against the head board, cradled my mug in my hands, and finally risked a look at the clock.

Five in the morning. Ugh. And it was February half-term this week too, so I didn’t even need to get up for work, which was just typical. Unfortunately, it wasn’t just missing Sean that was keeping me awake, because although he might be far away for the time being, he had left me with one thing to remind me of him, hadn’t he? Which unfortunately meant a very embarrassing trip to the doctor’s was on the cards for me today.

Grimacing, I sipped my coffee and tried to slow my nervous heartbeat. I couldn’t believe that I was going to have to go and get the morning after pill. Just the thought of having to say it out loud to Dr Massey filled me with dread and made my stomach churn. I’d never needed one in the past, and the thought of having to go today just made me feel careless, stupid, and juvenile. Wasn’t this what uneducated, drunken teenagers did?

I was getting myself too worked up about it, and could really do with a supportive voice to help calm me, but Sean was on a plane, Cait was back in America, and Sarah probably wasn’t even up yet. Doing a brief count I realised that, actually, with the time difference it was only nine at night in LA, so chances were that Cait would still be up.

Grabbing my iPad, I loaded Skype and saw the small green icon next to Cait’s name, indicating that she was indeed online. I wasn’t sure I’d ever been so pleased to see a green blob in my life, and wasted no time in pressing the button for video call and shuffling myself more upright.

After an impatient wait while the call tried to connect I finally saw the screen flicker to life as Cait’s jerky image appeared on screen, her chestnut hair looking like a wild mass around her face until the screen settled and she came properly into focus.

‘Howdy, stranger!’ she greeted with a grin that immediately made me feel a bit better. ‘I didn’t think we were set for a Skype today, but I’ll never turn down a chance to chat to my favourite bestie.’

‘Hi, babes, no, we weren’t, but I’ve gotten myself in a bit of a pickle and wanted some reassurance.’

Cait frowned, tucked her hair behind her ears, and nodded. ‘Hang on, I’m in the communal lounge, let me move somewhere a bit quieter.’

I watched as the video bounced around as Cait and her phone obviously walked somewhere else, before the screen righted itself and I saw her now sitting in front of a large bookcase, a look of concern on her pretty face. ‘What’s up?’

Oh God. Now it had actually come to the point where I had to say it out loud, this call suddenly didn’t seem like such a good idea. Maybe I should have used the simple call option, then at least Cait wouldn’t have been able to see the flush of mortification now spreading on my cheeks.

‘I, um … well … what do you know about the morning after pill?’ I blurted.

Watching Cait’s eyebrows rise in surprise, I cringed, fully expecting to see a judgemental look on my friend’s face, but was almost immediately surprised when she burst out laughing instead. ‘Seriously? You’re asking
me
this question? The girl who doesn’t date?’ Joining her in a small smile I immediately realised my mistake. As my best friend, Cait could give me fantastic reassurance and support, but since her experience with Greg the twat she had lived a completely celibate life, so she was hardly the most knowledgeable when it came to issues relating to sex. To be honest, I’d been so desperate for a friendly face that it hadn’t even occurred to me.

‘I’m hardly the best person to give advice on contraception, am I?’ Cait chuckled, seemingly unfazed by the conversation. Bless her. I totally understood her caginess about dating again, but I also knew that I would hate to live an eternal life of spinsterhood like she was. I was independent and loved my life, but the excitement that meeting Sean had brought to it was indescribable. It made me sad to think that my friend would never allow herself to risk experiencing those types of feelings again.

I also noticed that she didn’t dig for any details about why or how I had come to need the morning after pill, which was the typically sweet type of thing that Cait would do. ‘What about Sarah? Is she around?’

Absently twirling some hair around my finger, I shrugged. ‘I don’t know, it’s only ten past five here, so I doubt it.’ I’d phoned Cait first because even though all three of us were besties, Cait and I had an especially close bond. But she was right, if anyone could give me advice on this subject, it was probably Sarah – she’d been a bit of a wild child as a teenager – so I’d probably have to wait a couple of hours and then give her a call.

Nodding, I watched as Cait narrowed her eyes and shook her head, ‘No … wait, it’s Monday with you already, isn’t it? She had that early contract at the school for half-term so she should be up and at work already. Hang on, let me try adding her to the call.’ I watched as Cait’s finger appeared in the video feed as she tapped a few buttons on her phone.

‘I didn’t even know you could have more than one person on a call,’ I murmured in surprise.

‘Yep, it’s like a conference call … I’m just not sure if I can do it while I’m mid-call to you. Oh, wait, I think it’s working.’ Sure enough, a few seconds later my screen split in half, with Cait now on one side and the other half black.

There was a moment of silence, then a ringing tone and a loud huffing noise as Sarah answered, looking decidedly flustered and a little pink in the cheeks. ‘Morning. You two are up early.’

‘Hi, Sarah. It’s evening here, so technically I haven’t been to bed yet,’ Cait explained with a smile. ‘Our bestie has gotten herself into a bit of a pickle and we need your expertise.’

‘Oh?’ This seemed to get Sarah’s attention, and she rapidly seemed to stop whatever she was doing, push some wild strands of hair from her face, and stare into the screen at me expectantly.

‘Yeah, I … um … I need to get the morning after pill, but I’m freaking out about it. Can I just go to my regular GP or do I need a family planning clinic?’ I blurted. As I expected, Sarah’s eyes suddenly twinkled as she grinned at me, her interest in juicy gossip well and truly piqued by my confession.

‘What happened? A vigorous rumpy-pumpy with Sean split the condom, did it?’ I winced, mortified that I couldn’t even use that as the excuse.

‘Um … no, Sean was leaving to fly back to America yesterday and we sort of, uh, got a bit carried away with our goodbye.’

‘You didn’t even use a condom?’ Sarah’s eyes were wide, and I could tell she was bouncing up and down on her heels as she spoke – the gossip was out, and Sarah was clearly in her element. ‘Alexis Shaw, is this where I need to give you the talk about the birds and bees?’ she asked gleefully, causing me to glower at her. I hated when she used my full name.

‘Shut up, Sarah. I know I was stupid. I just got caught up in the moment.’

Tilting her head, she pursed her lips thoughtfully. ‘If I was banging a Hollywood superstar I think I’d probably get caught up in the moment too,’ Sarah agreed, nodding sagely, her face completely stoic and serious, causing both myself, and Cait, to splutter out a giggle almost hysterically. I might be laughing, but she was spot on the money. When it came to Sean, I had absolutely no self-control.

Blowing out a breath, I shrugged. ‘I’ve never had to get the morning after pill before. It’s embarrassing, I feel like some cheap slapper,’ I whined, sipping at my coffee to try and cover some of my mortification.

‘Are you saying I’m a cheap slapper then?’ Sarah asked in mock horror. ‘Because I’ve needed it twice in the past.’

Oops. I pursed my lips in a typical Sean gesture and winced – my words had probably come out wrong, but luckily I knew Sarah well enough to know she wouldn’t take offence. ‘You know that’s not what I meant.’