Until the Sun Falls from the Sky (35 page)

Before I knew it, he was gone.
Whoosh
.

I heard the garage door go up, the Porsche roared to life and then the garage door went back down.

The entire time I sat there, not knowing what to do or how to feel, especially about the fact that he just gave me another weird, but extraordinary, compliment.

What I did know was that I, again, managed to screw things up. Even though I thought I was doing the right thing for myself, for my family, for Lucien even.

What I also knew was that I really,
really
needed to call my Mom.

Shakily, I got up and left the fried chicken, the pulverized wine glass and that’s exactly what I did.

The Dream

I finally understood.

As my head lifted, my legs slid open, his hips fell between and my arms wrapped around him tight as if they’d never let go.

And I never
wanted
to let him go.

Never. Not for eternity.

My mouth sought his ear.

“I understand,” I whispered, the budding beauty of it flowing through me.

Lucien’s tongue swept across the wound where he was feeding.

His head came up, his beautiful eyes boring into mine, his blazing with triumph and searing into me like a brand.

His hands moved to my hips, lifting, his mouth came down on mine in a bruising, possessive kiss and he filled me.

Through his claiming thrusts, my mouth against his, I breathed lovingly, “I’m yours.”

* * * * *

“Leah.”

Hands were on me, my lover’s hands but they weren’t touching me in a loverly way.

“Leah, wake up.”

* * * * *

“Say it again,” Lucien snarled but I’d lost track.

I was so full of him; I’d never been so filled. It was beautiful, so beautiful I started crying.

“Say it again,” he demanded, his hand in my hair pulling my head back, not gently, the pain mingled with the pleasure of his claiming.

“I’m yours,” I whispered, my eyes focusing on his. “Only yours. Always.”

* * * * *

I was rolled, I felt weight on me, a hand on my arm shaking me.

“Leah, you’re dreaming. Wake up.”

* * * * *

He melted away. He wasn’t inside me anymore. My arms held nothing.

Everything went black.

The loss of him was immense. I felt it through to my soul.

Fear filled me and I screamed.

* * * * *

“
Leah, wake up!”

* * * * *

They were burning him.

And they were hanging me.

The sentence for his crime was to watch my death before his own.

My eyes were riveted to him as the flames curled around his powerful body.

I felt the noose go around my neck.

I love you
, I whispered to his mind.

* * * * *

The hand shaking me stilled but the fingers curled, biting into my arm.

* * * * *

I watched his eyes close, not with the pain of the flames with a different kind of pain.

I closed my own.

I love you too, sweetling
. I heard his voice in my head.

My heart took flight.

Then the trapdoor fell out from beneath my feet.

* * * * *

I came awake with a jerk and a cry, yanking away from Lucien’s warm, heavy body, my own prepared to flee. From what, I didn’t know.

I had my feet to the floor when an arm hooked around my waist and I was lifted up, back into the bed. Lucien curled me into his body, cradled in his arms. His back was to the headboard, I was in his lap.

I melted into him.

In all this bizarreness, the most bizarre of all was that I was trembling like a leaf and bawling like a baby.

“Ho… ho… holy
crap,
” I whispered, my voice hitching. My arms were around him, holding tightly and I didn’t let go as I kept right on blubbering.

One of his arms left me and I felt his hand stroking my hair.

“Holy
crap
,” I repeated, this time without the hitch. I burrowed closer, not knowing why, just that I needed to get close, as close as I could.

I actually
needed
it. I needed to feel his warm, hard, big body surrounding me, keeping me safe.

“It’s all right, Leah, you’ve just had a bad dream,” Lucien murmured to the top of my head.

Was that what happened?

I didn’t remember. I just remembered the terror.

And the sorrow.

No, not just the sorrow. The
loss
and the sorrow.

“Holy crap,” I whispered again, a fresh batch of tears overflowing, this time silently.

“Shh, sweetheart, it was just a dream,” Lucien soothed gently, his words stirring my hair.

I burrowed deeper as the tears flowed. He held me and I held him back.

Finally, after I had control, I said quietly, “I don’t remember.”

His hand left my hair and his arm wrapped around my upper back, his long fingers curling around my shoulder.

It was then everything came crashing back to me.

Not the dream. Lucien and the wineglass incident. My body tensed and when it did so did his arms. My eyes took in what I could see, which wasn’t much, mostly his throat in the dark.

“You’re here,” I said stupidly.

“Where else would I be?”

I didn’t know. He seemed pretty pissed when he left. I didn’t expect in a million years he’d come back at all much less hold me tenderly after I had a bad dream.

My head tipped up so I could see his face in the shadows.

“You aren’t mad at me anymore?”

I saw his chin dip down to look at me.

“I was,” he told me and I braced. “I shouldn’t tell you this, pet, but it’s difficult to stay angry with you when I can smell you.” He gave me a squeeze and continued on a murmur, “And fucking impossible when I can feel you and hear your breathing and your heart beating in your sleep.”

This made my heart start beating faster.

He went on, “Then you were moving, then screaming, then crying.”

I felt my lips part. “I screamed?”

His shadowy head nodded.

“I
cried?
” I asked.

Another nod.

“In my sleep?” I went on.

Still another nod right before he moved us, sliding down the bed and rolling so we were facing each other. He pulled the covers over us and then his arms moved around me again.

“Do you remember any of it?” he asked, sounding more than mildly curious, and I shook my head against the pillow. “None of it?” he pressed and I shook my head again.

“I don’t think I want to,” I told him. “It made me scream,” I paused then added, “and cry.”

His arms gave me a squeeze. “Do you remember who was in your dream?”

I shook my head yet again. “I don’t know. All I know is, whoever it was, I lost them and it made me sad.” I felt a shudder slide through my body and I pressed closer to him. “Unbelievably sad.”

He gathered me tightly to his chest. “It was just a dream, sweetheart.”

This time I nodded my head.

But it didn’t feel like a dream. I didn’t remember it but whatever it was, it felt real or at least the pain it left behind did.

“Has that ever happened before?” Lucien asked.

I nodded again. “When I was younger I used to have dreams I didn’t remember. My Mom would have to wake me up but it hasn’t happened in a really long time.”

“Did you ever remember those dreams?”

I shook my head and whispered, “I hope I never remember this one either. With those, I would wake up scared or upset,” my voice dipped to nearly inaudible, “this one was worse.”

He gave me another reassuring squeeze. “It’s over.”

It was then I realized what I was doing. And it was a second after that that I wondered if Myrna would snuggle close to her vampire after pissing him off royally.

“Lucien?”

“Yes, my pet?”

“Earlier,” I started, he tensed and even though I didn’t want another wineglass incident, especially when the thing he was holding now and very able to throw and shatter against a wall was me, I forged ahead, “I didn’t mean to make you mad.”

He didn’t reply so I got up on an elbow and looked down on his shadowed face.

“I’m sorry I made you mad.”

He rolled to his back and pulled me on top of him, a hand in my hair pressing my face into his neck.

He still didn’t reply. He simply started to play with my hair.

I decided it was time to get things straight.

Unfortunately, my mother wasn’t answering her phone which meant she was probably out at a movie. Mom liked movies, any kind of movies, mostly weepies and rom coms, but she wasn’t adverse to an action film, the bloodier the better.

Aunt Nadia, who was always my favorite auntie and the one I could talk to about anything, wasn’t answering either which meant she was probably out with Mom.

I didn’t want to call any of my other aunties or cousins because I didn’t want them to know I was such a moron or more of a moron than they already thought I was.

I called Lana who answered. But she said Rafe was going to be there any minute. She was in a tizzy of excitement. I could hear it and now I understood it, but she promised she’d call me back first thing in the morning.

So I was still as in the dark as ever about everything that was happening.

Therefore, it was up to me to get things straight.

“I thought I was giving you what you wanted,” I told Lucien and his hand in my hair stilled for a few moments before his fingers started twirling a lock again.

Then he said something that threw me way off guard, “I want
you
.”

Me? He wanted me?

No one wanted me.

I was, as I just noted, a moron, amongst other not so good things.

This made my stomach feel warm at the same time it made my heart lurch and fear crawl up my spine.

This was just great. Instead of two contradictory emotions now I was having three.

“You have me,” I lied before pointing out the obvious, “I’m right here.”

I felt his head move, his lips touched my temple before he settled onto the pillows again.

“I had you, sweetling,” he murmured, using a different endearment, this one old-fashioned and way, way,
way
too effective. So effective it wiped out the heart lurch and the crawling fear and significantly intensified the warmth in my belly. “Every day and every night, I’ve had you. Until today and tonight. Now, you’re gone.” His hand clenched in my hair gently and he asked softly, “Why have you gone, Leah?”

Something stuck in my throat. I knew what it was but I swallowed it away and pretended it wasn’t there in the first place.

I knew I was lying to myself now but I figured lying to myself was definitely the best way to go.

“I’m here,” I whispered, “right here, where you want me to be.”

His hand went out of my hair and he moved me. He slid me off his body and shifted me so my back was pressed to his front, his arm tight around my waist, elbow cocked, hand pressed flat between my breasts.

“Remember that,” he said into the back of my hair when he’d repositioned me.

“What?” I asked.

“That here is where I want you to be. For twenty years, I’ve wanted you here.” His arm tensed and pressed me deeper into his body as I felt his face press deeper into my hair. “You don’t wait twenty years for a whore, Leah. You don’t take her shopping for books. You don’t move your clothes in her closet. You don’t take her amongst your people. And you certainly don’t put up with her when she’s misbehaving.”

I decided to focus on the last thing he said because it pissed me off. The other stuff made a lot of sense. It also made my belly feel warm again and I really didn’t need
that
.

But Myrna wouldn’t get pissed off. Never.

I tamped down the anger and decided to go with resigned.

“So, where does this leave us?”

“Where we’ve always been,” he replied, his voice somehow lighter like he’d not only had some weight lifted but also like he was amused. “But instead of you coming out fighting, you’ve retreated and put up our defenses.”

Oh no.

He had me totally figured out!

He pressed closer and stated firmly, “But I’ll get through.”

Oh no he would
not
. Not if I had anything to do with it (which I did).