Unwilling (10 page)

"I don't have a safe word."

"I haven't been doing anything to you that you need one. And I'm not going to."

"Did you do it? Water board her?"

"She spent an hour trying to convince me she really wanted me to. Then she started intentionally trying to piss me off so I'd want to punish her. Finally she pushed me far enough I yelled at her and told her, 'Fine, you want to be tortured, I'll torture you.'" She paused. "I made her leave. I've never talked to her since."

I laughed lightly, then sobered. "That seems pretty sick, wanting to be tortured."

"She was pretty screwed up. But human sexuality manifests itself in a lot of ways. I don't cast judgment even when I think it's unhealthy. Who am I to judge?"

I paused. "You have been side stepping my question."

She chuckled. "Yes, I have." She paused. "Melissa, I'm not the sort of person who enjoys hurting someone. I would have felt horrible if I had hurt you."

"Even though I deserved it."

"You deserved to know how you had made me feel. It's not the same thing. I couldn't make you feel how I had felt, but I could make you feel hurt in other ways. But two wrongs don't make a right. The world wouldn't be better if I hurt you. Neither of us would have come out of it better."

"But you said you would punish me if I break a rule."

"Punishment doesn't mean hurting you." She paused. "I could make you clean the kitchen with nothing but a toothbrush. It would take you hours."

"I'd rather you whipped me with your crop," I told her after a moment. "Get it over with."

"If you deserved a real punishment, I could never bring myself to hit you enough to deliver one. The toys are for fun, not pain.
If I touch you, it's for fun, not pain.
"

She continued to cuddle and caress as we talked, the conversation growing slower and slower. She was still caressing me when I fell asleep.

I spent the next several days trying to tease her into taking things further. I didn't get anywhere with it. By Tuesday I was getting pretty drastic about it. We were talking as I was cleaning up the kitchen from dinner, and I kept intentionally brushing against her, looking for every opportunity I could find to walk past her.

"Stop teasing," she finally ordered. "It stopped being funny two days ago."

In response I brushed past her again, making sure to rub my ass against hers on the way.

She tipped over the last of her soda from dinner, spilling it down the countertop and onto the floor. "Get your toothbrush," she ordered.

"What?"

"Go get your toothbrush and clean up this mess."

"You're not serious."

"Do it!" she ordered firmly. "You just disobeyed a direct order to stop teasing. Go get your god damned toothbrush."

"Fine," I said, starting to feel hurt and pissed off. I stomped off to the bathroom and retrieved my toothbrush. I wondered what I would use to brush my teeth afterwards.

She was waiting for me with her arms crossed. "Clean it up," she said. "All of it. You may use your toothbrush or your tongue."

I glared at her for a moment but then attacked the mess with the toothbrush, cleaning a little of the mess, then tapping the brush into the sink, picking up a microscopic amount of mess each time. She stood and watched me the entire time. It took forever, and it wasn't a very good job when I was done, but I finally decided I'd done as well as I could.

I looked over at her. I hadn't finished cleaning up. There was a small container of leftovers from dinner. Alexandra waited until she had my attention, then she slowly dumped the container on the floor.

"You bitch," I told her.

"What?"

"Oh shit," I said. I dropped to my knees in front of her and lowered my head to her feet. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it."

She bent down, grabbed me by the jaw, and lifted me to my feet, glaring at me, holding my by the jaw. It hurt. She spun me around so my back was to the door and started pushing me backwards. "Bedroom. NOW!"

I backed away from her. She kept pushing me. I turned around and tried to scamper to the bedroom. Every time she caught up to me, she gave me a shove in the proper direction.

"Alexandra!" I said. "I'm sorry."

"Shut up."

She shoved me into the bedroom. I turned around and tried dropping to my knees in front of her, but she grabbed my jaw and held me up. "Naked. NOW."

I stripped out of my clothes as quickly as I could. I tried to take time to fold them, but she yanked them from my hands and threw them in the corner. As soon as I was naked she pointed to the bed. "Kneeling. Get up there."

I climbed onto the bed. "Turn around, back to the foot of the bed, and back up as far as you can."

I faced the head of the bed and backed up until my feet were against the frame of the bed at the foot of the bed.

"Don't move," she hissed. "Not one muscle."

She disappeared into the closet and came out after a moment. She tossed something onto the bed and I glanced down to look at it. It was a coil of rope.

"I told you!" she said, yelling. "Not to move a muscle."

I snapped my eyes forward, picking a spot on the wall and staring at it.

"I'm sorry."

"Shut up!"

"Are you going to hurt me?"

"Shut the fuck up!"

I pressed my lips together and listened as she paced around the room behind me. After several times back and forth behind me, she stepped up and quietly asked, "Are you going to let me do this?"

"Yes."

"Hands behind your back," she said sternly. "Palms together."

Meekly I complied. She wrapped a rope around one wrist, then put several wraps around both wrists, just above the wrist bones. Then she squeezed my elbows closer together before tightening the rope around my wrist a little more. I then felt as she wrapped the rope around itself a few times before tying it off.

Then she wrapped the rope around my waist twice then did something to tie my wrists to the rope around my waist. This left my hands at my back just above my ass.

Then she worked her way up my arms. She wrapped the rope around my arms just below my elbows, used her hands to pull my elbows closer together, and tied them that way. She wasn't gentle, and I started to feel pressure on my shoulders.

"That hurts," I said.

"Where?"

"Shoulders."

She adjusted the rope, taking a slight amount of pressure off my shoulders, then wrapped the rope around me twice more before securing my elbows in a fashion similar to my wrists.

"Alexandra," I said. "I'm sorry."

"If I do something that hurts," she said. "You may tell me. Other than that, shut up. If you disobey, this will be worse for you."

I pressed my lips together.

I'd never been more excited in my life.

She tied the rope once more, this time above my elbows. When she was done she stepped back. "This is inescapable," she said. "You can't reach the knots. They won't slip. Short of finding a way to fray the rope, your arms are tied like that until I release you." She stepped up to me. "You've been pushing my buttons for days. I've had it."

I didn't say anything.

"On your face," she said. But she helped me lower myself to the bed, lying on my stomach. I turned my head to the side.

She used a second rope on my legs. She tied my knees together then my ankles. Then she bent my legs as close to my butt as she could and somehow tied them there.

"You can't reach any of those knots, either, but I am sure going to enjoy watching you try." Then her voice grew gentle. "Does anything hurt?"

"No."

"Are your hands okay?"

"Yes."

"Feet?"

"Yes."

She stepped away for a moment. I heard her enter the closet and return after a moment. She roughly pulled some sort of harness over my head. It felt like it was made from straps of leather. She buckled it into place.

"Open your mouth," she ordered. She had one hand on the back of my head and she was holding something long and black in front of my mouth. I clamped my lips together.

She bent down and whispered into my ear. "Do not fight me, Melissa. You will lose. I can leave you like this all night. You won't like it."

Meekly I opened my mouth. She slid the thing into my mouth and somehow buckled it to the harness. It filled my mouth and served as an effective gag. I couldn't spit it out and I couldn't talk.

"Is that choking you?" she asked. I shook my head. "Can you continue to wear it?" I nodded.

She walked into the bathroom and came back with a small hand towel. She arranged it carefully on the bed underneath my chin. I looked down at it then up at her.

"You'll figure it out eventually," she said to me.

She stepped away and I heard her walk to the dresser. I tried to turn and look, but I didn't have very much mobility. She stepped back up to me and clipped something to the back of the harness on my head. Then she fumbled at the ropes binding my arms. After a moment she said, "You aren't going to like this." Then I felt the harness pulling my head back. She tightened it. When she was done I was flat on my stomach with my neck arched backwards almost but not quite as far as it would go so that I was facing forward towards the foot of the bed. "You don't understand yet," she said quietly. "But that last part was actually a kindness."

She walked out of the room but came back after a short trip to the bathroom. She tossed a book on the bed. Then out of the corner of my eye I heard her get undressed. She left again then came back with candles and set them up in the room. She lit the candles before turning off the lights. She walked to the closet and came back after a moment. She tossed her riding crop on the bed next to the book. She threw one more thing onto the bed. I couldn't tell what it was.

Then she climbed onto the bed, sitting with her back to the headboard and adjusting the pillows behind her. She spread her legs, resting her feet against my shoulders. I found myself staring right between her legs. She was glistening.

"Here are the rules, slave," she said. "You may do anything you want except close your eyes. If you close your eyes, you get the crop." She picked up the crop and whacked me with it. It stung. "Blink once."

I blinked.

"One blink for no, two blinks for yes. Do you understand?"

I blinked twice.

I could do anything I wanted? I couldn't move.
I struggled for a while, but she knew what she was doing
when she tied me up
. She smiled at me.

"This is punishment for you and pleasure for me," she said. "Feel free to struggle. It will get me more e
xcited. You can try begging
. That will get me excited, too." She paused. "You're staying like that until I've had three orgasms. You get to watch."

"Oh god!" I tried to say into the gag.
All that came out was, "Mmm mmmm".

And with that, she settled in a little further, picked up the book, and started to read.

"Mmmm mmmmm!" I said.

She looked over the book at me. "What's that? You say you love the way I tie you up? Excellent."

"Mmmmmmm!"

She leaned forward and patted my cheek. "I'm having fun, too. I'm so glad you're enjoying this."

"Mmmmmm!"

I tried struggling, grasping with my fingers for the knots. I had no idea where they were tied.

"Where are the knots?" I asked into the gag. She ignored me.

If I stretched, I could just barely touch my feet. I tried feeling for knots, but all I felt was rope.

I collapsed for a moment. I was completely, utterly helpless, and all Alexandra was doing was reading a book.
I had finally gotten her to do what I wanted and she immediately ignored me.
My shoulders were already stiffening up. So was my neck. And I realized saliva was building up in my mouth, but I couldn't swallow.
As the saliva began dripping past the gag and down my chin, I realized what the towel was for; it was to catch my mess.

Alexandra looked over her book at me. "Figure out what the towel is for?"

I blinked twice.

"Are your hands and feet okay?"

I wriggled my fingers and toes then blinked twice.

"You look amazingly hot like that, Melissa. Are you enjoying being completely helpless?"

I thought about it and blinked twice.

She laughed. "Let me know how you feel in an hour."

"Mmmmmm!" I started struggling again. It was futile and I knew it, but I couldn't help it.

She went back to reading her book, ignoring me. Frustrated, I closed my eyes. I her a swish then the crop smacked the back of my shoulders. It stung. I immediately opened my eyes.

Alexandra went back to reading while I stared at her glistening
vulva a foot and a half in front of my eyes.