Walk on Water (12 page)

A rising moon hung over the lake, silvering the ripples. Ian skipped a stone. “Your dad misses you,” he said.

“What?” she replied, amazed. “Did he send you to say that?”

“Of course not. Do you honestly think he would?”

She could see his features better now that her eyes had adjusted, but she still couldn’t read his expression. “No,” she admitted. “Probably not.”

“He’s not the same guy since you left. He’s never been what I’d call happy, but now he’s just morose. You need to call him. Better yet, go home.”

“He knows where to find me. He has a phone too.”

Ian sighed. “If you’re as stubborn as he is, you’re both in a lot of trouble. You don’t miss him at all?”

Lexa crossed her arms. “I’ve been keeping busy. I’m sure Blake’s busy too.”

“And what’s this ‘Blake’ thing about? Why do you call him that? He’s your dad.”

She snorted impatiently, tired of his assumptions that she was the one in the wrong. “When I was a baby and my mother died, my
dad
basically abandoned me at my grandmom’s. I was five before he pulled his head out and decided he wanted a daughter again. So he missed a few formative years there, years when things like names get established.”

Ian took that in, then plunked another rock into the lake. Lexa wished she had held her tongue. She rarely spoke of those lost years, mostly to protect Blake. Now she’d made it sound as if she were holding a grudge.

“Look, Ian,” she said, eager to end the conversation. “I’m guessing you mean well, but my family’s complicated.”

He chuckled. “Isn’t everyone’s?”

“You can’t fix us.”

“I just thought you should know.” He threw one last rock, then faced her. “So how are you liking pairs? Is it everything you’d hoped?”

“If I tell you is it going straight back to Blake?”

He looked offended. “I’m not his spy, if that’s what you think. He doesn’t know I’m here. Or that you are. Or anything about that sweet offer you made me.”

“You didn’t tell him I asked you to be my partner?” she asked, almost afraid to hope.

“I said no, so what difference does it make?”

“The difference is Blake’ll flip if he ever finds out.”

Ian smiled. “I might not be smart enough to mind my own business, but I’m not a complete idiot.”

Lexa laughed with relief. “Good to know. And I’m sorry I did that, for what it’s worth. I was so focused on what I wanted that I didn’t think everything through.”

“You did kind of drag me into this,” he said, still grinning. “I mean, in my defense.”

“You don’t need a defense. You like him—I get it. He likes you too, and Blake doesn’t like a lot of people.”

That “Blake” hung in the air between them.

“I thought you had night shift at the gym now,” she said to change the subject. “Is this your day off?”

“No, I came here straight from work. Someone quit, so I’m back on afternoons until they hire a replacement.” He shook his head. “It’s nonstop chaos at that place.”

Someone had cranked up a boom box. Music drifted out to them with smoke from the growing blaze. “So . . . do you want to join the party?”

“They don’t have
anything
to drink besides beer?”

“Sadly, no.” She crumpled the cup in her hand. “But if nothing else, I need a place to throw this away.”

She couldn’t help comparing their heights again as they walked side by side to the fire, but she held her tongue about pairs. This was the closest she and Ian had ever come to having a moment. She didn’t plan to ruin it by forgetting that they wanted different things.

Bry cut them off at the edge of the crowd. “You need to do something about Jenni,” he told Lexa, barely acknowledging Ian.

“Jenni? Now what’s—” She broke off with a groan as she spotted the problem. “Great. Who invited
them
?”

“Who do you think?”

Three jocks from Erie Shores High stood beside the fire, holding six beers among them. Lexa recognized the one Jenni was hanging on as Adam Yale, the beefcake basketballer from commencement. Jenni’s not-so-ex, Jacob Larimore, was there too, watching Jenni and Adam with an expression that promised trouble. Lexa didn’t know the third boy, but he was built like a cross between an offensive lineman and a concrete truck. All three towered over the skaters they stood among—and the way Jenni was flirting with Adam, some sort of fight seemed inevitable.

“Is she drunk?” Lexa asked.

Bry’s eyes rolled. “She’s hitting on someone she barely knows in front of a guy who still thinks he’s her boyfriend. I’m guessing she’s not sober.”

Lexa knew she ought to do something, but she had no idea what. “If Jacob wants to take a swing at Adam, It’s not like I can’t stop him.”

“No, but you can get her out of there before it goes that far.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll try.” Lexa began weaving through the crowd. To her surprise, Ian stuck with her.

“Lexa!” Jenni greeted her, peeling one hand off Adam. Her fingers clamped around Lexa’s elbow and pulled her so close they were touching. “Have you met Adam? Isn’t he cute?”

“Hi,” Lexa mumbled, embarrassed for them all. Jenni had clearly entered the zone where whatever regrets she might have wouldn’t surface until the next morning, and the way Adam was eyeing her suggested he’d like to pile some on.

“What’s up?” he said, still gazing at Jenni. Polishing off the beer in his right hand, he dropped that cup into the fire and started on the drink in his left.

Lexa forced a smile and turned to Jacob. “Hi, Jacob.”

He nodded once, still glowering.

“Did you guys all come here together?”

“I called them,” Jenni said. “Hot night, free keg, single girls . . . can’t beat that.”

“I’m Mick,” the third guy offered. “You one of them ice princesses too?”

“I skate,” Lexa said tightly.

“Wearing those short little dresses?”

Jacob snickered.

“Am I right?” Mick demanded, encouraged. “Best part of the ‘sport.’ ” Four hands filled with beer, he and Jacob settled for bumping elbows.

“Jenni, can I talk to you a minute?” Lexa asked, trying to pry her off Adam.

“What?” she said petulantly. “Tell me here.”

“Yeah, don’t run off,” Mick said, leering. “This must be a nice change for you girls, having some real men around.”

Lexa felt Ian stiffen at her side, but the feelings she cared about most were Bry’s. Her eyes found him where she’d left him, hopefully out of earshot. “Yeah, super awesome.” Anyone with Mick’s lack of subtlety seemed unlikely to grasp sarcasm. “Jenni, I need you alone. It’ll only take a minute.”

“Back in a sec,” Jenni promised, reluctantly releasing her grip on Adam. “Don’t go anywhere.”

As Lexa pulled her through the crowd, Jenni finally noticed Ian. “Ooh!” she said, latching onto him with newly freed hands. “Hello, handsome.”

“Jenni, will you quit it?” Lexa exclaimed.

“What?” she asked, all drunken innocence. “You said you don’t like him.
I
like you,” she told Ian, feeling up the arm she was dangling by. “I think you’re
very
nice.”

Lexa’s cheeks burned. She had never loved her best friend less. “I didn’t—” she tried to explain to Ian.

“Forget it,” he said quickly.

“No, but—”

“We’re good.” Shaking his head, he glanced toward Jenni and mimed draining a cup into his mouth.

Bry rushed up to confront Jenni. “Why did you invite those morons? Nobody else even knows them!”

“Adam,” Jenni said, smiling dreamily. “Adam’s soooo pretty.”

“So you invited him
and
Jacob? That seemed like a good idea to you?”

“No, no, you’re confused. Jacob
brought
Adam. How else was I going to get him here?”

“I’m not the one who’s confused.”

“Everything is perfect,” Jenni assured him. “I told Jacob to come and bring some friends for the too-many girls at this party, because he’d already told me that he’d be hanging with Adam tonight. Which makes me a genius.”

“Genius,” Lexa repeated, still angry. “There’s the word I was searching for. Come on, I’m driving you home.”

Jenni dug in her heels. “Home? No way!” she said, pulling free at the edge of the crowd. “I’m just getting started!”

“And where are you planning to end?” Lexa asked. “With a fistfight between Jake and Adam? A hookup with another guy you barely know? Their buddy Mick is a pig, in case you haven’t noticed, and what I’m seeing of Adam doesn’t look much better. Have a little self-respect.”

Jenni drew herself up, furious. Then she clapped a hand over her mouth and ran for the water’s edge.

“I’ve got this,” Bry said, taking off after her.

“I’ll keep an eye on the goon squad, make sure they stay put till you’re gone,” Ian told Lexa. “Once Jenni’s out of here, they’ll probably take the hint.”

“Let’s hope so.”

“Okay, then. See you around.”

When?
she wanted to ask.
Where?
Her irritation with Jenni hit new highs as she realized his words were probably empty. “Yeah. And thanks again. You know . . . for everything.” She hurried off, cursing Jenni under her breath.

Jenni had finished vomiting by the time Lexa reached her, and her resistance to leaving had ridden out on her dinner. Lexa and Bry hustled her through the darkness up to the road, quickly deciding that he would drive Jenni’s Lexus back to her house, where he’d left his car, while Lexa followed with Jenni.

“If she’s going to puke again, it’s better if she does it in my car,” Lexa said.

“Better for her, anyway,” he agreed.

For half the long drive to the Kims’ house, Lexa remained silent, so full of the angry things she wanted to say that she didn’t trust herself to speak. Jenni sat with her head lolling out the open passenger window, equally quiet.

“What the hell?” Lexa finally burst out. “Nobody but you wanted those losers at the party. Did you bother to think about that? And what’s up with telling Ian that I don’t like him? Are you trying to screw over everyone you know, or is this just the cool new Jenni?”

Jenni gulped fresh air and sat up. In the headlights of the oncoming cars, she looked shaky but unrepentant. “Don’t expect an apology for Ian. If you can’t get your story straight, maybe you’re the one who needs to shut up.”

All the swallowed complaints of the past months rose into Lexa’s mouth at once. “I don’t even get you anymore! It’s like all you care about now is being popular and impressing people who don’t matter, not even to you. You can’t tell me you ever had feelings for Jacob. Everly’s a bitch. And Adam . . . two weeks ago you didn’t even know who Adam was.”

Jenni stared straight ahead, jaw clenched.

Part of Lexa’s brain told her to drop it. That part got overruled. “Bry says you’re skipping practices. Regionals is only three months away! Maybe you think you’ll coast through, and maybe you’re right. But what about sectionals? Are you even thinking that far ahead?”

“Not really. No.”

“So what’s your—”

“Open your eyes, Lexa! I’m not like the rest of you! I’m just a local girl at her hometown rink who’s hung on longer than most. We both know I’ll never be national champion. I’m not going to worlds, or the Olympics, or anywhere else worth mentioning. I’m just not good enough.”

“Because you have to prac—”

“I’ll
never
be good enough,” she said bitterly. “I wasn’t born with your talent, so you don’t get to judge me for wanting to enjoy senior year like a normal person. At least I didn’t run away from home. I’m not throwing away a title, like you are. I’ve risen as high as I’m going to and now it’s time to grow up. You ought to grow up too.”

They faced off, furious, both wanting to say so much more, then abruptly turned their gazes out opposite windows.

Lexa’s jaw hurt from being ground shut when she finally reached Jenni’s street. Jenni tumbled out before the Explorer reached a full stop and slammed its door hard behind her.

Neither one glanced back as Lexa drove away.

“Okay! Yes!” Candace called enthusiastically. Walker and Patrick had just completed their first clean double twist lift. “How did that feel?” she asked, skating out to join them.

“Awesome!” said Boyd. “Back in the saddle!”

“It felt good,” Lexa agreed, disturbed to realize that it wasn’t as much of a thrill as she’d anticipated. Having easily picked up both the throw double Salchow and throw double toe loop the week before, she had needed only the double twist lift to complete the required elements in the junior pairs test, the highest test Boyd had already passed. She should have been ecstatic at a milestone that meant they were about to start learning the senior moves, but ever since her fight with Jenni, Lexa was finding it hard to get excited about anything.

Although they still weren’t speaking, Lexa couldn’t stop arguing in her head. Jenni’s crack about running away had gotten under her skin. The lack of support it took to accuse her of throwing away a title was infuriating. But the worst part was wondering if Jenni was right.

“Let’s see it again,” Candace said, “with the footwork leading out this time.”

Lexa would have to land perfectly to be in position for that footwork, but she nodded and skated off without worrying about it. If she didn’t land this one, she’d land the next one, or the one after that. She couldn’t keep living and dying by every success and failure—especially not with Boyd continuing to act as if all their successes were his and all of their failures hers.

They skated back crossovers around the turn and positioned themselves for the lift, Lexa riding a back inside edge with Boyd’s hands on her waist. Setting her toe pick, she sprang hard, propelling herself up and around him as he pushed her high overhead and released. Temporarily free at the top of the lift, she snapped off two barrel rolls before he caught her waist again. She landed perfectly on one foot, made eye contact with her partner, and launched into the footwork sequence.

She was learning to read Boyd on the ice—his strengths and weaknesses, the moves that always slowed him down—and adjust accordingly. Skating in sync with him was getting easier, but unison was more than lifting the same leg at the same time—it was lifting it to the same height with equal extension and matching turnout. Unison was mirroring each other’s arm, hand, and even finger positions. Unison was pushing together, flying together, landing together,
breathing
together.