Wanting More (29 page)

“I’m not goin’ to stand here and let this keep happenin’.” I didn’t give a shit about what my sister was thinking.

Amy kept at it though. “It’s not like you think. Just stop it. He doesn’t know you are back. He thinks you moved back to Kentucky.”

“Conner, you need to calm down. I don’t know what’s goin’ on here, but that man is at our door and he’s waitin’ for his wife.” My sister pushed me away from the door.

Ty came walking in and I wasn’t worried about beating my way through him either. “He needs to know what it’s like to have a fist thrown at his face.”

Without asking his wife, Ty walked closer to Amy. “Amy, I don’t care if you stay here for Christmas, hell, I don’t even care if there is something really happening between you and Conner, but right now your husband is at our door and he ain’t going to leave until you talk to him. Now, I will stand beside you the whole time if that’s what you want, but if you want to remain friends with Conner, or whatever else you are to each other, then I suggest he stays put in this room and keeps his mouth shut.” I was going to punch him for giving me that look.

For some reason when Ty grabbed my sister’s hand, they looked at each other and smiled and she changed her attitude. “I’ll stay back here with my brother. You two go do what you need to do. Amy, if you want to stay, you know you’re welcome. You don’t have to go back with him.”

Amy put her head down and started to cry. “I wish it were that easy. Conner, you know I can’t stay. You know why I have to go.”

“You’d pick that over your own safety?” I couldn’t believe this was happening. What was she thinking?

“I have to. I’m so sorry you guys. I have to go with him.” I went to follow her out of the room, to beg her to stay with me. I didn’t care about his threats to my family. We could handle them together. They would all understand.

Ty walked in front of me and pushed me back again. I gave him a desperate look. “Ty, you don’t understand. She doesn’t want to go with him.”

When he pushed me down to sit on my bed, I knew it was going to be a fight I didn’t want to start. “She ain’t goin’ to leave him. He has somethin’ on her and she can’t afford to leave. I told her she has friends that would help her, but she’s adamant, man. I can’t just sit back here and know that he’s goin’ to be layin’ his hands on her, forcin’ himself on her again.” I couldn’t tell them the whole truth, so I made it sound like it was something other than our relationship.

Ty was watching me like I was going to run past him and go after Amy. I was considering it.

“You have to let her make the choice. Look, dude, I know she’s your friend and I know you care about her, but she’s a grown woman. If she wants to leave with him, you have to let her.”

When I heard him putting on a pathetic show to try to get Amy to leave with him, I thought about grabbing my damn shotgun and chasing him off our property. I didn’t know what he had on Amy, if it was even something at all, but she needed to know that I was there for her, no matter what.

“This is bullshit!”

Noah and Bella came walking down the hall and Ty grabbed them right away. “Somebody came to see Aunt Amy and we don’t want him knowing we are all back here. Can you two be quiet for a couple more minutes?”

They both shook their heads and stood there with us, being good for once.

I heard the front door close and put my head down. She had gone with him and I didn’t think I could take it anymore. The weather was terrible and she was putting herself in even worse danger.

My bedroom door creaked open and Amy was standing there with tears in her eyes.  Ty patted me on the shoulder and left us to be alone.

Amy sat down beside me and looked at the floor.

“You stayed?” I was so relieved.

“I have to tell you something and you might just tell me that you don’t want to be with me anymore.”

Oh God. All I could think was that she was still sleeping with Rick and he threatened to tell me. I tried so hard to think it could be anything else, but I couldn’t think of a single thing that she would have to hide from me, unless she was sleeping with him.

“Before I tell you, I need you to promise not to freak out. I wanted to tell you when it happened, but I was so scared how you would handle it. I just love you so much and I can’t deal with thinking I could lose you over this.”

I cleared my throat and spoke quietly. “How bad is it?”

“It depends on how you take it. I guess it could be a deal breaker.” She started to cry and I knew it was bad news.

I’d heard of people having affairs only to realize that they just wanted to stay in their marriage. For the life of me, I couldn’t believe she would want to be with an abuser and a liar over me. It made no sense. “Do you want to be with him?”

She fell to the floor in front of me and put her hands on my legs. “Why would you think that?”

I couldn’t look at her. It hurt me too much to look at something that I might lose. “Just tell me what you have to say. It’s late and I don’t think my heart can take much more, to be honest with you.”

She spoke in a whisper. “Conner, please look at me.”

“I can’t. I know what you’re goin’ to say and I don’t think I can handle it. I’m just not ready to hear somethin’ like that.”

She stood up and walked away from my bed. “I was afraid of this. I knew it was just too much to ask. I mean, how could I ever think you were ready to hear something like that? Who would want to be involved with a married person and find that out?” She turned around and faced me. I kept my head down, but I could see her feet facing my direction. “I just want you to know that no matter what, I’m keeping it.”

I looked up at her, because I obviously didn’t hear her clearly. “Come again?”

“I’m keeping it, Conner. There’s nothing you can say to make me change my mind. I didn’t want to tell you, but Rick threatened to tell your family what a whore I was. He said he would make it so they would never accept me.”

I stood up and walked over to her, but didn’t touch her. “Wait, did you just? Are you pregnant?”

She nodded but didn’t speak.

“And it’s mine?”

This time I got a dirty look. “Of course it’s yours. Why would you ask me that? “She backed away from me and got all defensive.

“I just…I thought you were goin’ to tell me you were sleepin’ with Rick still. I didn’t know that you were goin’ to say that.” I sat down on my bed and looked up at her again. “Pregnant?”

She nodded again. “I understand if you’re pissed. I’m keeping it though, it’s not like we can do anything about it now anyway. It’s way too late for that.”

She had her arms crossed over her chest and was waiting for me to say something. I was so shocked that I didn’t know what to say. “What do you mean too late?” I threw my arms up in the air. “Wait, I didn’t mean it like that, I swear. I just don’t understand.”

“I’m too far along, Conner. We’re four and a half months pregnant.”

I stood up and pulled her into my arms. “You said we’re.”

“Well, you are the father, but I meant what I said. If you don’t want all of this, I can do it on my own. I never thought I could have children and when the doctor told me I was pregnant the other day, I was so happy. I want this baby.”

I kissed the top of her head. “Are you kiddin’ me? This is the happiest moment of my life. There ain’t no way you’re raisin’ our child without me.”

She fell into my chest and just burst into tears. “I was so afraid to tell you.”

I cupped my hands on her cheeks. “Listen to me right now. I love you and I want a life with you. I don’t give a shit about any damn lunatic ex-husband. I don’t care about how much money you have and I sure as hell don’t care if you ever work again. I want you and now I want our child. I talked to Ty and he and his dad said I can have a parcel of land on the farm and build on it. I’m goin’ to give us a home and we’re goin’ to be together. Hell, you can even invite your family for Christmas next year.”

“I don’t know what to say.” I wiped the tears that were falling down her cheeks and she smiled.

“Say you want that too. Just tell me you want this. That you’re finally ready to give yourself to me completely.”

She nodded her head. “I am, Conner. You’re all I want.”

I kissed her perfect lips and held mine there as I spoke. “Good, let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow my family is going to eat you alive.”

Chapter 38

Amy

Getting Rick to leave wasn’t as bad as I thought. When I first walked out and saw him standing by the door, I half expected him to drag me out of there. One thing made me feel safe and that was the fact that he didn’t like people to know he was a violent man. With Ty and Miranda lingering around, he kept up with his fake appearance.

He started to threaten me about telling Conner’s family about my pregnancy and ruining my happiness. Since Conner didn’t know about our bun in my oven, it became my first concern. I had to get rid of Rick.

As soon as I accused him of being drunk and laying his hands on me, he was quick to back down. To protect mine and Conner’s secret, for the time being, I gave Rick the number to the house and told him I wasn’t leaving because he was drunk. I said it loud enough so Miranda could hear it. I knew she was about to learn the real truth, but it was about protecting Conner from Rick. It didn’t matter anyway, I had written down the wrong number. When he finally settled for leaving me there, I finally felt safe. Still, I didn’t leave that door until I watched his headlights disappearing down the road.

I didn’t know anything about the money he was talking about and I certainly didn’t owe him a dime, so if he thought he was getting something from me, he was very wrong. As soon as the holidays were over, I was going to the police. There had to be some way to keep him away from me and from Conner’s family.

Being back in Conner’s arms, in his bed, made it all seem real. Even though I didn’t have a belly, he wrapped his arms around me and held his hands on my stomach. I laced our fingers together and closed my eyes. “You’re safe now, Blaze.”

I kept my eyes closed as I talked. As long as I was in Conner’s arms, I felt safe. “I still can’t believe he left. I mean, I thought he was going to drag me out by my hair.”

“I thought you were going to leave with him.”

“I think I decided that was a bad idea the moment I stepped out of your bedroom. The thought of not being with you killed me. I finally realized that I didn’t have to do this alone. As much as I don’t want you to have to be involved, I appreciate that you always protect me.” He was so warm and I nestled my head over his chest. With my eyes closed, I listened to his heart beating.

“I will always protect you. I don’t care about a damn piece of paper.”

“You know he’s going to come back, right?” As safe as I felt, I didn’t want to ever see Rick again.

“Darlin’, there are so many unanswered questions that have to do with that man. One thing you need to remember is that you’re not alone and if I have to take you and my baby to Kentucky or any other state to be safe, I will. We’re goin’ to be a family.”

I rested my chin on Conner’s chest and looked up at him. “Say that again.”

He smiled and reached down to kiss me. “We’re goin’ to be a family.”

I turned my body into Conner’s and ran my fingers through his. He reached his arm around me, in the spooning position. “Thank you.”

He kissed the back of my shoulder. “For what?”

“Loving me.”

“Lovin’ you was easy, it was gettin’ you to believe it, that was the hard part.”

I closed my eyes and let myself drift to a goodnights sleep. I don’t know why it was so easy for me, but being in Conner’s arms made all the difference in the world.

The next morning came sooner than expected, but Conner held me tight in his arms. He even helped me look up my father’s number and call to tell him that I was okay. I didn’t mean to make the man worry, but I didn’t exactly have a choice. Since they had an alarm on their house, I didn’t have to worry so much. Besides, Rick was after me, not my father.

I wanted to ask my father if he knew anything about fifty thousand dollars, but since it meant nothing to me, I just dropped it.

The bottom line was that Rick had been stealing money that I’d been making for six years. The salon was mine and everything in it belonged to me. Rick had been living with so many lies that even he couldn’t keep them straight anymore. He could show up a million times, but he couldn’t make me leave with him. I had no secrets from Conner and now that I knew he was going to stand by me and be with me, I knew I could get through anything.

After all of the months of fighting with Conner to wait and look for a good reason to get away from Rick, now that I was pregnant, everything had changed. I no longer cared so much about having anything. If Rick wanted to fight me and he ended up taking the salon, I would still have Conner and our baby.

I figured that Miranda was going to come flying into the room giving me a piece of her mind, but she never did. Since I felt stupid, we stayed in his room all day. He went out to use the bathroom and get us something to eat.

All throughout the day, I kept waiting for the phone to ring or Rick to knock on the door, but he never did. By the end of the night, I just knew he wasn’t coming back for me. In fact, I was pretty sure that he was probably drunk somewhere, in the company of whoever he could find. Hopefully, they would both get a disease and die.

The next morning, I woke up to Conner’s kisses. I’d taken a shower before bed and couldn’t imagine how horrible my hair looked, but he didn’t even seem to mind.

I felt down to my belly, just reminding myself that none of this was a dream.

Conner kept staring at me. “What are you thinkin’ about?”

I smiled and leaned over to kiss him. “I’m thinking about being a mother.”

“Yeah, you were smiling and lost in thought over there.” He reached for my hand and kissed the back of it. “When do you want to tell my family the good news?”

I sighed and shook my head. “Maybe we should just wait. I mean, I can’t expect that they will be happy about it.”