Whatever the Cost (11 page)

“Fuck.
Fuck
,” Liam moans. Curling his arms up over his head, he grabs at the bedding, twisting his hands in it, hips coming up off the bed and undulating into Jacen’s mouth. His reddened length slides back between Jacen’s stretched lips, gliding over his tongue, and then draws back. Jacen hollows his cheeks and Liam moans more deeply, bucking quickly back inside, needing to be closed up in Jacen’s mouth. Turning his face into the side of his arm, Liam lets out every whimper, every gasp.

“Hold him down, suck him ’til he comes,” Claudia says to Jacen, her voice lust-roughened.

Bearing down on Liam, locking his hands around his hips, pinning them to the bed, Jacen works his mouth on him, sucking him raw through the condom, bobbing his head. Hungry for it, maddened by the stark, visceral reality of being stuffed full of Liam’s cock, and being instructed to take him completely apart, Jacen obeys. He hums and sucks even harder, moaning around Liam’s flesh, working and curling his tongue when he can, giving Liam such intense sensation that, for Liam, all rational thought seems to funnel out through his dick and down Jacen’s throat. Lips drawn back over gritted teeth, Liam whimpers and hisses, so erect it hurts, right on the knife’s edge of oblivion.

Jacen pulls off with a slurp, strips off the condom and corkscrews a tight fist up Liam, root to tip. He erupts. Semen shoots in a wide arc from his slit, pulsing with the beat of his heart, spattering in thick drops over the whole length of his gloriously naked body.

Slowly, Liam comes to himself again, feeling emptier, drained. Staring up at the ceiling for a long moment, aware of his nakedness, of the come drying on his skin, he listens but doesn’t dare look as Jacen gets off the bed and Claudia goes to her knees in front of him. There’s the zip of Jacen’s pants coming open, the crinkle of foil, a thunderous, rolling groan from Jacen as he buries himself in her throat, finally getting some much-needed relief for his own raging passion.

Liam waits to be summoned, keeping his eyes averted, knowing he’ll be haunted later by the wild sounds of Jacen’s pleasure at her rosy lips. But they leave him be. A few minutes later, Jacen is pushed unceremoniously down onto the bed and Claudia climbs on top of him. Knowing he isn’t needed anymore, Liam slips away, unnoticed. He rolls off the bed and escapes to an adjoining bathroom.

In a fog, he cleans himself off, not wanting to bother with a shower, just wanting to leave. Dimly aware that he’s still whimpering like a kicked dog and that tears are streaming down his cheeks, he uses a wet cloth to clean up. Tugging his underwear back up, he waits at the door, cringing inwardly as Jacen groans loudly with his climax, Claudia’s higher-pitched cries burning like a scar into Liam’s brain.

There’s a soft knock at the other side of the door, so Liam opens it, eyes trained on his feet as Jacen slips through into the bathroom. Not saying a word, nor waiting to see what Jacen might say, Liam goes back into the bedroom, gathering his discarded clothes and pulling them hastily on.

“Thank you for joining us,” Claudia says somewhat deliriously from where she is curled up like a cat on the bed. “You were spectacular, my darling. I enjoyed it immensely. Will you consider doing this again? I’d like that.”

“Yeah, that’d be great. Just let me know,” he says with a smile that is completely convincing in its sincerity. If nothing else, Liam is at least well-trained.

“I will. Excuse me if I don’t show you out. Shall I summon Teddy for you?”

“No, thank you. I can manage it,” he says.

She smiles kindly at him. “Okay then. Goodnight, William.”

“’Night, Claudia,” Liam returns.

As soon as he’s got the door shut behind him, he’s running blindly through the hall, down the curving staircase, out of the wing to the main foyer, bursting out into the fresh air and fumbling for his keys. Moments later, he’s racing down the streets in his truck, coming up fast on home, pulling into the driveway and slamming the gearshift into park.

Then he loses track completely. It all goes grey and formless.

Jacen finds him a short time later, sitting in the dark a few steps inside the house, his knees curled up to his chest, hugging them like a scared little kid. Boots clicking on the hardwood, Jacen walks up to him, stands there over him for a long moment, and then sinks down beside Liam with a groan.

They sit side-by-side, their backs to the wall, cocooned in the darkness, Jacen a little bit taller, Liam a little bit smaller. With a sigh, Liam’s head tilts sideways, leaning against Jacen’s shoulder. Eyes fluttering closed, heart lightening, Jacen kisses the top of his friend’s head.

“You smell. Like mouthwash.”

“Mm,” Jacen hums. “Thanks for clarifying.”

Liam smiles, just a little. “Welcome.”

“I keep an economy sized bottle in the car. Emergencies. You know.”

“Yeah. Totally.”

From the living room, a clock chimes ten o’clock. They listen as it bongs, the sound echoing and fading away.

“Couch’d be more comfy,” Jacen observes.

“Yeah,” Liam agrees, slipping a hand around Jacen’s bicep, resting it there. The natural scent of him, richer now, fills Jacen’s senses. He gets a little high off of it, sighing softly.

“What?” Liam grunts.

Jacen buries his nose against Liam’s head, his short hair tickling. “You smell too.”

Frowning, Liam admits, “Didn’t shower yet. Sorry.”

“Mm, no. It’s a good smell.
Your
smell. I like it.”

This makes Liam frown even more, until he hears Jacen take another deep inhale.

“Stop smelling me.”

“Make me.”

Liam sighs, “Too tired.”

“We should go to bed.”

Liam’s head snaps around. Looking incredulously at Jacen, Liam struggles to his feet, groaning as his knees pop, smoothing out his polo shirt and fidgeting. Jacen follows suit, standing as well.

“I mean, you know.
Separately
go to bed.”

“Yeah, I know,” Liam scoffs, looking like he knows no such thing.

“Hey,” Jacen says gently, getting face to face with Liam. Weariness overpowers Liam again, so he leans back against the wall, unable to protest as Jacen invades his personal space yet again that evening, hooking a finger under his chin to gently tilt it up.

“Jace....” Liam aches, letting Jacen move him, letting him press up close, their bodies flush from chest to thigh. Shifting his legs slightly apart, Liam’s suckable, plump lips go soft and pliant, ready to be kissed. It gets under Jacen’s skin, just like Liam’s unique perfume.

Jacen’s lips drag in a light, open-mouth kiss to the faint wrinkle by the corner of Liam’s mouth where shallow dimples sometimes dent his cheeks. “Why don’t you kiss? You never—you said you never kiss, and I never asked why, so, why don’t you kiss?”

Tangling the fingers of both hands in Jacen’s touchable, soft hair, Liam nuzzles Jacen, the tip of his nose dragging over his cheek as Jacen continues to pepper kisses around Liam’s mouth, skirting the edges of it.

“Is it... like a boundaries thing, or keeping something sacred?”

“I get off on it,” Liam breathes, cupping the side of Jacen’s face, feeling his jaw work as he applies the next kiss, this one to the small dent under Liam’s lower lip. “I love to kiss. Fucking love it. And I don’t, I don’t want to give them that. I don’t—”

Jacen’s lips are right there, hovering. They’ve left a tingling, spearmint-scented trail over Liam’s skin and the temptation is too great, his defenses too weak. Angling his head slightly to the side, Liam moans out a breathy little sound and catches Jacen’s lips between his own.

Exhaling sharply through his nose, Jacen’s brow furrows. He grunts and parts for Liam, the very tip of the sweet-tasting tongue licking lightly over the center crease of Jacen’s lower lip, flicking over his top lip before it is swallowed up by Jacen. Sucking a hard kiss to the luscious fullness of Liam’s mouth, Jacen fits his hips snugly against Liam’s. For a second they break apart, with Jacen panting roughly as he discovers that Liam is hard. He’s completely hard and as soon as Jacen inhales, Liam attacks his mouth again, tongue-fucking it. Simultaneously Liam’s hips roll forward in a needy thrust, grinding against Jacen’s body.

Jacen palms the curve of Liam’s ass as his tongue delves back into Jacen’s mouth, into the same hot cavern that his hardened cock had ridden to an exquisite climax not so very long ago, darting in and out of it, moaning when Jacen sucks on it, then pushes back for more of Liam’s sweetness. They tangle together, teeth nipping lips that press tightly, joining them, binding them. Every sound they make gets lost and swallowed back, devoured. Counter to every kiss, surging in and out, back and forth, go Liam’s hips, rocking desperately against Jacen’s upper thigh when it draws up snugly to Liam’s balls, giving him more to move against. Jacen squeezes his handful of Liam’s bottom, guiding him faster. The tempo increases. Liam’s keening sharpens. Quivering, bucking against Jacen, held so tightly that Jacen feels every shiver, drinks down every exhale, Liam comes, wrapped in him.

The sterility of their earlier intimacy causes something to snap in Jacen’s mental control center. He needs contact with the proof of Liam’s passion, that raw, primal, sacred moment between them. Pushing a hand down, pivoting it at the wrist, Jacen yanks open Liam’s pants and slides his fingers under the waistband of the white cotton briefs. His fingers drag through Liam’s hot, dripping come and Jacen makes a small, wrecked sound, taking a big swipe of the fluid, gathering it up.

With his clean hand, Jacen hastily undoes his jeans, shoving them out of the way. He takes a quick lick off the tip of a come-coated finger, moaning with heady pleasure at the salty flavor. Liam’s eyes fix on Jacen’s mouth as he rolls the tiny drop of fluid back on his tongue, swallowing it, then he surges in and tries to lick his own flavor from Jacen’s mouth.

Jacen’s soiled hand wraps his straining cock. He jacks himself rough and fast, fingers sliding slickly with the lubricant of Liam’s spend. Gasping and grunting, Jacen beats off feverishly as Liam kisses him dizzy.

Stars explode behind Jacen’s eyes as he climaxes, painting Liam’s polo shirt in streaks of pearly white.

“
Lee
....”

“It’s okay... it’s okay...” he promises between caresses of his perfect lips.

They take a shower together in the dark, washing each other off, letting the warm water soothe them as it cleanses. Turning on the light seems to equate returning to reality and neither of them can bear that yet, so after they’ve dried off, they find clothes to sleep in without turning on a single lamp or light switch.

“I don’t wanna sleep alone,” Jacen admits, when they are left wondering what comes next. “Can we just sleep? Please?”

“Yeah,” Liam says, sliding in under the covers on the other side of Jacen’s queen-sized bed.

“Lee?” Jacen asks, his voice hushed, his head nestled on the pillow, facing Liam who gazes back sleepily at him.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for kissing me.”

“Go to sleep,” Liam whispers.

Jacen is out cold in minutes. He sleeps straight through until morning. When he next opens his eyes, the sun is out, the sheets rumpled, and the bed empty except for himself. Liam is gone.

Right about the same time that Liam is in East Hollywood with a married, successful screenwriter perched between his spread thighs, getting fondled and receiving a slow, sloppy blowjob, Jacen is shuffling up to Yasha’s front door. Bleary-eyed, Thermos of coffee in hand, and still wearing pajama pants, he rings the bell. The scent of jasmine is overpowering, as the front yard is littered with it. The perfume tickles his nose and he sniffs, rubbing the back of his hand over his upper lip as footsteps approach from within the house. Beneath the perfume he can smell the ocean, hidden behind the property.

A slender, petite brunette answers the door. Valery Savaria, Yasha’s wife, gawks at Jacen, his plaid flannel pants, his flip-flops, his dazed, watery-eyed expression, and tsks, “Honey, you look fucking pathetic. Come on in. Yasha’s just finishing his shower. Went for a run.” Jacen follows her into the home like a lost puppy. “You need anything? Breakfast? Xanax?”

“Hug?”

“Yeah, okay. I can work with that. C’mere,” she says, waving him on, opening her arms as Jacen folds himself around her much smaller form and groans, the coffee held carefully out of the way.

“Fuck my life,” Jacen complains, grumbling into her hair, hanging loose and soft around her shoulders in dark tight curls.

“That bad, huh? Who is it? Man or woman?”

He grunts then admits, “Most of the time he’s a man.”

“Hmm. Well, that’s new for you anyway,” Valery observes, patting him on the back, trying not to get smothered, rolling her eyes as Jacen starts unconsciously groping her left breast through her shirt. “Is it serious?”

“In every conceivable way. Why couldn’t I just settle down with a good woman like you, and listen to what my momma always told me? That would have been so much easier. Shitty job. Shitty kids. Nice and boring.”

“Gee, thanks, Jace,” she scoffs, trying to untangle herself, but Jacen just wraps her up tighter, his busy, roaming hand now cupping the firm, healthy curve of her ass, the other playing with the ends of her hair.