Why Lie? (Love Riddles #2) (5 page)

The smoke still bothers me but since no one is at the table, I head that way while pulling my phone from my apron. My thumb moves over the screen to call one of my girls.

“Hey, girlie,” Gina greets.

“They’re making bets as to whether he’ll be back tonight or not.” I jump right in.

“Why are you even surprised?” she asks.

Turning around once I reach the table, I lean against it so I can face the diner. “I don’t know.”

“You’re the one who poured soda on him and got everyone talking in the first place,” she murmurs, a touch of irritation in her tone.

Even though I didn’t live full time in Ferncliff during my school years, I still made friends. Gina and Molly are my closest and I am currently still in the doghouse with both of them because I failed to spill the beans on Heath and I hooking up.

Thing is, I was so caught up in it happening that I didn’t come up for air to share with everyone until it was over. While I was staying with Cecil, I decided it was best to keep it to the two of us. Cecil didn’t know Heath and it was highly unlikely that their paths would ever cross.

With Gina and Molly, I had to worry about one or both of them saying shit to Heath if they saw him. Things were going great with my whole “don’t share” plan until Heath tried to apologize.

Sure, I could have quietly acted like nothing happened when Heath strolled into the diner. This is why they say hindsight is twenty-twenty. Once you have time to sit down and think things through the likelihood of you not getting pissed and dumping soda on someone is increased.

Sucks for me, but I wasn’t prepared and went off half-cocked. You live, you learn. Obviously that’s the case since I didn’t pour soda on him today.

Thing is, Gina and Molly both thought I was insane for being annoyed at Heath still. Maybe since I didn’t graduate from Ferncliff High, Heath’s golden boy status in town wasn’t ingrained in me. Gina was married with two kids and she still screamed so loud when I admitted we had sex that my ears rang.

Molly was currently giving me the cold shoulder because she called dibs on him the summer we turned sixteen. Even though thirteen years have passed and she is seeing someone, she’s still giving me the silent treatment.

Part of me wonders if Gina is only talking to me now so she can report back to Molly. God, I should have called Cecil.

But, they’re my girls so my impulse is to vent and get advice from them. What stings is, for some strange reason, it feels like I’m the bad guy in their eyes.

Directing my gaze skyward, I say, “Yeah, I shouldn’t have done that. Well, I just walked outside to call but I should probably get back.”

“Are you going to talk to him?” she asks, ignoring my attempt to wrap up the call.

“No clue,” I murmur.

It’s the truth. Rationally, I get that the adult thing would be to talk to him. At lunch today I proved that I can be in a crowded room with him and function. Anything more than that, I just don’t know.

“You got time for me tonight?”

That’s what he had said before I dumped the soda on him. Granted, it could be argued that he hadn’t meant it to sound like it did. But, to me, after a long shift, it sounded like he wanted to book my bed by the hour.

“Maybe he only wants to be friends,” she says.

At her words, my gaze drops to my feet. Even after sharing what happened between us, both her and Molly keep coming back to the “he only wants to be friends” thing. I had argued that if they meant friends with bedroom benefits, they’d be right, but they disagreed.

Pulling my phone from my ear, I stare at the display and watch as seconds add to the length of time of our call. I give up.

Moving the phone back to my ear, I murmur, “You’re probably right.”

“See, now there’s nothing to worry about. Just let it go and you can move on. David has a friend I could set you up with.”

Ugh, no way in hell am I going out with one of David’s loser friends.

“Thanks, babe.” I lie. “I don’t think I’m ready to go out with anyone but I’ll let you know once I am. I really gotta get back though so I’ll talk to you later.”

“Okay, girlie. Talk again soon.”

After we hang up, I stare at the display of my phone again. Instead of feeling better, I feel worse. Awesome girl talk.

Slipping my phone back into my apron, I’m still stewing on her words as I walk back into the diner. What is so unbelievable about Heath wanting me?

It’s always words from those closest to us that have the potential to inflict the most damage. Once I’m back in the kitchen, I wash my hands, a force of habit after working around food for this long.

Allen’s plating my order.

“Thanks,” I mutter, grabbing the plates.

One of them is a lot hotter than the other. I hold the cooler one higher up on my arm, the palm of my hand less sensitive to hot plates.

He’s there when I walk out. My eyes avoid him despite the fact that every one of my nerves is firing that he’s near. Even though the moment was brief, my eyes catalogued and evaluated every nuance of him.

He’s wearing the same suit from lunch. The suit that makes me want to undress him with my teeth. His hair’s damp, not in a styled way, in a “careless he was in a rush” way.

He’s sitting at the same table as before. Most of all, I don’t miss that he only has eyes for me.

Still outwardly ignoring him, I serve my table and check on another one. Only after I top off their drinks do I turn my attention to Heath.

“What can I get you?” I ask his shoulder.

There’s a better chance that I’ll be able to stay pissed at him if I don’t look at him. It should be criminal how attractive he is.

Remember he’s the dick who broke your heart.

Remember he’s the dick who broke your heart.

Remember he’s th—

My internal chant is interrupted when he says, “Sydney, will you at least look at me?”

Stubbornly keeping my eyes on his shoulder, I repeat, “What can I get you?”

I don’t need to see his frustration. I hear it.

“You know what I want.”

My eyes get squinty and I ignore how dangerous his face is so I can glare at him.

“Tough luck. I’m not on the menu.”

There are a couple of gasps behind me.
Oh, shit, shit, shit.
That came out louder than I thought it would.

He’s up and out of the booth in a flash, his hand tight around my wrist as he pulls me out of the dining area, through the back hall, past the bathrooms, through the kitchen and into the back vestibule.

“Don’t forget to club her over the head,” someone calls after us.

Twisting my arm, I pull away. He follows me, his body pressing mine against the wall as his mouth covers mine. With my palms flat against his chest, I struggle to push him away, refusing to open my mouth to him.

His tongue glides along the seam of my lips. Unwanted memories invade my thoughts reminding me of just how talented his mouth and tongue are. How easily he tricked me into thinking he actually cared.

I won’t be tricked again.

Lifting my knee, I plan to show him just how serious I am. He dodges me and steps back.

I wipe his kiss from my lips and growl the words, “Like I said, I’m not on the menu.”

Spinning, I start to walk away but he stops me, his arms around my waist, his chest to my back.

“Please give me another chance?”

“What?” I snap. “To fuck me and then ditch me again? No, thanks.”

“I screwed up before. I’m not going to do that again,” he replies, his breath hot against my skin.

“I don’t believe you,” I whisper.

There are worse things than being lonely. When you’re lonely, you wish for something you don’t have. It’s an empty ache inside, but you can ease it, not fully, with friends and family.

The week I spent with Heath filled me to the brim. Then I was left even more empty than I was before him. It was so much worse because, now I knew what I was missing.

“You will.”

“God, what is it with you?”

His arms around me tighten. “I’m not walking away.”

“Too late, you already did.”

He spins me until I’m facing him and grins down at me. “I’m going to have fun changing your mind.”

I shiver and his grin deepens.

“Can I get back to work now?” I grumble.

He dips his head, touching my lips with his before he lets me go.

Without looking back, I move into the kitchen to catch my breath. Allen is standing close to the door so I know he heard everything.

His eyes widen and he quickly moves away. Great, just what I need. This will be all over town in no time. Pulling my cell from my apron, I call Gigi.

“Hello,” she greets.

“Gigi, I know I took a couple weeks off not that long ago but I need to get away. I’m off tomorrow. Is there any chance I can take off Sunday and Monday? It’s last minute but I think I can get Clarey to cover for me.”

“Is everything okay, baby girl?” she asks.

“Heath just kissed me, twice,” I reply.

“I see. Where will you go? Back to Cecil’s?”

There it is. No judgment, no attempt to push her opinion on me, just support. I should have called her and not Gina earlier.

“Can I go to the cabin?” I ask.

What I need is to unplug. What better place than a cabin with no cell service, and no Wi-Fi?

“Of course. You know you can use it anytime, but are you sure you want to go this weekend? The views are better when it isn’t raining.”

“No, honestly, a rainy weekend at the cabin sounds perfect.”

“Do you want me to come keep you company?”

Turning toward the wall, I press my forehead to it. There’s a part of me that would like nothing more than a weekend at the cabin with my Gigi. I’m afraid I’ll be terrible company, though. What I truly need is time alone to gather my thoughts in a place that doesn’t remind me of him.

Knowing that he wants to rekindle whatever it was we had will surely resurrect the ghost of his presence in my place.

“Can I take a rain check, Gigi?”

“Only if you promise to cash it in, baby girl.”

Man, I love my grandmother.

“Cross my heart,” I whisper.

“You should pack up and go now. That way it won’t be dark when you get there.”

“Okay, Gigi. Thank you.”

After we hang up, I make sure my tables are set before turning them over to Wendy. Thankfully, I’m not closing tonight so I’m only cutting out an hour early. In no time, I’m up in my place and shoving my crap into a bag. My grandparents only keep the essentials so I pack enough food and liquor to get me through the weekend.

Once I have everything loaded into Lady, my silver convertible bug, I hit the road. First stop light I hit, I rummage through my CDs. Adele is on blast by the time the light changes to green.

I can’t sing. That does not stop me from belting out song after song with her. Her music reminds me of the music Gigi would play when I was little. There aren’t any gimmicks or weird auto-tuned electronic overlays. That’s a guess since I know zip about recording music.

Adele has a gift, one that is keeping me company all the way to the cabin. The rain starts halfway there and is really coming down while I park. I reach into the backseat for my bags and make a run for it. I’m soaked by the time I hit the front porch. After I unlock the door, I toe off my muddy sneakers so I don’t track a mess in.

It’s darker than it normally would be because of the rain. Using the flashlight on my phone, I make my way into the kitchen to turn on the breakers. Once the electricity is hooked up, I switch on lights as I head back to the front porch. It sucks but the water cut off is out there and the rain has not let up. I step back into my muddy sneakers and turn it on as fast as possible.

Back inside after my mad dash, soaked and alone, I start to second-guess how soothing a weekend at the cabin will be.

“Time for a bubble bath,” I tell no one in particular.

Many minutes later, cup of hot cocoa with a healthy splash of Baileys, I sink into the tub. Once the water is up to my chin, I’ve had my second drink of spiked cocoa, and I have a chance to enjoy the patter of rain on the roof. This is exactly where I need to be right now.

Tonight, I’ll clear my mind. I’ll let the stress and pain of the last few months go. I’ll find my center and hold on tight to it. I’ll let the rain be my lullaby and I will get a good night of sleep.

Tomorrow I will pro-con the crap out of whether or not letting Heath back into my life is what’s best for me. As much as I have relied on advice and guidance from my friends and family in the past, the decision needs to be all mine.

Shifting my arm out of the tub, I reach for my mug. Before my time and long before people in town started the tradition of giving us funny mugs at Lola’s, my great grandmother had simple white ceramic mugs with her name printed on the sides.

There are a couple of those mugs on the display case at the diner. Gigi has a couple more at her house, the rest, and there aren’t many left, are here. It’s one of the mugs I’m using now.

A short while ago, I was undecided about whether I would take over Lola’s. It was over a cup of spiked cocoa with Gigi that I made up my mind to stay.

I’ve been to a lot of places. More than once I’d get a wild hair and hit the road. Lola’s and this cabin are the closest I’ve ever come to feeling like I belonged somewhere.

Once the water turns lukewarm, I get out and dressed. Since I’m not hungry enough to cook, I curl up on the couch with a bag of chips.

When I start dozing, I drag my ass off the sofa and up into the sleeper loft. There’s a bedroom on the main level, or I could have just crashed on the couch but the loft may be my favorite place on earth.

There’s a ladder, a sturdy one with a decent angle so it isn’t scary, behind the woodstove. It overlooks the open-style living and dining rooms and covers the back half of the cabin.

There’s one long low set of drawers that run along one side. There’s enough space to pull the drawers open but otherwise, the rest of the loft is one giant bed with a feather top. At the back wall, the one opposite of the opening, is a circular window.