Wide Open (10 page)

And one of them was kissing me now.
The other was the very first girl, my first everything. She was my girlfriend in high school, when we both were so young. She tried so hard to help me, fix me, be the one to save me. But when it all slid downhill for me, she bailed. With good reason.

She was too sweet, too innocent, not ready to deal with the emotional bags that I brought with me everywhere I went. I didn't blame her. In fact, I looked back at her and that whole relationship—my only relationship—with fondness. She was there for me when the accident happened. She helped me through that in some ways. I would always be grateful to her for trying.

I changed things up, turning us so that Maya was pressed to the wall instead. I let my elbow rest on the wall by her head and didn't mind that I had to bend to reach. That mouth was worth any kink I'd have in the morning.

She let her hand slide from my neck, but she fisted the fabric of the front of my shirt. She broke away with a breath and looked up at me. It looked like she was on the verge of tears, but she was smiling.

And heaven help me, it was absolutely beautiful.

She spoke softly. "You have no idea what you've done for me. You just have no idea."

I chuckled. "It's just a few truck parts. No biggie."

"It was a huge biggie," she insisted in a whisper and put her arms around my waist. I felt her exhale, like a thousand pounds had been lifted from her. "You saved my brother's life."

My brow creased as I rubbed my hands down her back. "What was that, sweetheart?"

"Maya," someone called. We looked over to see an older woman holding a cup of coffee and looking perturbed yet irritated. "It's time. It's starting."

Maya looked up at me and licked only her bottom lip. I felt a small rumble go through me. What the hell was wrong with me?

"I have to go," she said and smiled beautifully. "Please come and listen?"

I nodded. "That's why I'm here. To stay."

In truth, I had decided I needed to be the one up at that podium one day, but for now, I needed to make myself commit. No more back row for me.

I was done with being a coward.

She smiled small as she walked away with the other woman. I went and sat right smack in the middle of the room—addicts surrounding me at three hundred sixty degrees. I took a deep breath, preparing myself for whatever I was about to hear. I felt this little push to go up there, for me to be the one to tell all today, but I wasn't ready. Not quite.

I looked up to find Maya at the podium. She was twirling a coin in her fingers, that loving, possessive look in her eyes like before. It was a coin. I lifted my eyes to find her gaze on me. She smiled and licked her bottom lip before closing her eyes and opening just as she began to speak.

"When I look at this coin, I see a completely different life, the one I could have lived, the one I was saved from by someone who loved me enough to come and find me, be the bad guy that I needed him to be." She lifted it, though it was too small to see the numbers. "I got my four-year coin today." The room around me erupted with applause and she tried to hide her tears, but finally just smiled through them. I couldn't even clap I was so in awe of her. This seemingly simple thing was so indescribably beautiful as I watched her be embarrassed and try to finish her story. The way she tugged at her earrings while looking at the floor, the light in her eyes as she spoke of her brother and father, the sadness that overcame her as she talked about her father dying and how much she wanted to get high, but her brother watched over her, and she somehow made it through without breaking her clean streak. All of it played out across her face and movements, and I'd never been so enthralled, never seen anything so beautiful.

She told us everything. When she was done, the hour was up and everyone clapped and went up to congratulate her.

But I held back. I wanted her to have this time to be the center, to soak up the much-deserved congratulations. I went to the front steps and sat. So many things weighed on me. I knew by then that Mason knew I had stopped by and Emma had told him I saw her at the store.

I watched several people go and even more come for another meeting. My peace was weird. I hadn't felt peace of any kind in so long that it almost felt uncomfortable.

"Are you waiting for a cab or for me?" I heard.

I turned to Maya and let my grin show. "Definitely not a cab." I stood and brushed off the back of my jeans. "You see, I'm a mechanic, ma'am," I said in my best Southern gentleman voice. She giggled. "I know how to fix things. My Jeep runs just fine."

"Good to know. You know, this guy fixed my truck for me," she took slow steps toward me, "and left me a note to explain before going incognito for six whole days."

"Pfft. That guy," I shook my head, "is obviously a tool."

"He's a crafty, sweet, son of a gun, and a pain in the butt."

I laughed. "All that?"

"All that," she confirmed and made the last step. She looked up at me. "Thank you. You didn't have to."

"I wanted to." My fingers reached out and barely gripped and grazed the ends of hers. "I was being a coward. I took it out on you."

"You're not the first person to take it out on me and you won't be the last. I'm a counselor, remember?"

"But I'm not one of your callers," I corrected. "And you're the girl I'm chasing."

She smiled wider. "You're not going to let that go, are you?"

I chuckled. "After that kiss?" She blushed a little, her neck turning pink. "No, I won't be letting go after that."

"I sort of attacked you, huh?" she laughed out breathily.

"Sort of?" I stepped half a step closer, barely a sliver between us. "That was…"

"Scary?" she supplied with a little laugh under her breath.

"Awesome," I countered and lifted her fingers in mine, toying with them between us.

"You deserved it," she said breathlessly, looking at our fingers together. "I would never have been able to get it fixed otherwise. And my brother—we had an emergency this week, and if you hadn't fixed my truck—"

"What happened?" The words jumped from me, concern etching my forehead. "Did something happen to you?"

"Everything's fine. It was him, not me. But he's fine now, so thank you. Your timing was amazing."

"Don't worry about it. I wanted to. You
can
make it up to me though." I smirked. "What time should I pick you up tomorrow?"

"For…a date?" She may have been trying to look serious, but a smile sat in the corner of her mouth.

I didn't answer. She knew exactly what I meant. I grinned down at her, making her squirm. She wasn't getting off easy. She tilted her head to the side and then said, "Okay. You can pick me up at six."

"Great." I felt her closed fist in my hand. "Will you show it to me?"

She squinted in confusion, but I gently squeezed her hand to tell her. She slowly opened her hand to reveal the coin. I lifted it reverently in my fingers, and prayed and hoped and begged that one day I would have one with that many years on it, too.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" she whispered, a tear running from the corner of her eye like it was finally free. "That stupid, ugly coin is really beautiful."

I wiped it from her cheek with my thumb. Holding her face, I moved and put my lips to her forehead. The way she gripped me around my waist so tight made me think she hadn't had someone hold her in a long time. Maybe ever. And this girl needed to be held. She deserved to be absolutely adored.

When the door opened behind us, it had been so quiet and still that we both jumped at the sudden noise. She giggled and leaned back. "Thanks. Um…"

She smiled and seemed as unsure about all this as I was. "Yeah, um," I joked.

She licked her bottom lip as she smiled. "I better go. I'll see you tomorrow?"

My eyebrow rose. "You think I'm going to stand you up?"

"No," she shook her head and walked backward to the doors, "just checking."

"Nothing could stop me," I heard myself say. I scoffed at how easily I turned into mush around her.

Her smile was gorgeous as she went back inside. I turned and raised my fist in the air in triumph, closing my eyes. That girl was going to be mine. I know I didn’t deserve her, but I couldn't stop chasing her.

I opened my eyes, the smile a mile wide on my face, and quickly put my arm down at the sight of her friend—the one with the coffee cup still attached to her hand. She gave me a solid glare. "If you hurt her, I'll end you, hotshot."

Hotshot? "Yes, ma'am." I nodded and cleared my throat. "I won't."

"Good." She smacked my chest with the back of her hand when she passed me. She stopped. "Holy cow." She gripped my arm. "What do you have in here? Rocks?"
I chuckled. "No, ma'am. It's a good way to keep idle hands busy."

She looked at me closely, her eyes squinting a little. "You're going to be good for her. I can tell."

"Well…thanks?"

She laughed and started to walk through the doors. She turned back and smiled. "Hotshot?"

"That's me," I joked.

"She's going to be good for you, too."

I nodded and watched her leave. Of that I had no doubt.

The next day at work was the only day it seemed to drag on. Most of the time I was perfectly content to stay busy and do what needed to be done, but that day was brutal as it crept smugly by. It must have wanted to torture me.

My boss knew it was about a girl. He said I was mopey, whatever that meant. I wasn't mopey. I was anxious and excited and couldn't wait to have my mouth on hers again. That wasn't mopey, but I'm not sure what you would call it.

When I finally was able to go home and get a shower, I put on some dark jeans and threw on my black leather jacket. The nights were cold. It was almost time for the snow again and the top would have to go back on my Jeep.

I rubbed my hands together when I went outside. It was colder than I thought. I had called the center that morning and gotten Maya on the first ring. She gave me her address and her cell number, since we'd forgotten to do all that the night before.

When I pulled up, I parked on the street because the driveway to the duplex apartment was full. I got out and saw Maya in the doorway as I was coming up.

I stopped.

Maya was standing in the doorway, looking absolutely gorgeous in black tights and a dress with a flowy jacket thing. But she wasn't alone, and her arms were wrapped tightly around some other guy's neck.

Maya

"I'll be fine. I always am," he insisted.

"Will, I know, okay, but it's been so long since you've been alone this long. And what the doctors said, it's getting more aggressive."