Wild Rendezvous

Published by Accent Press Ltd – 2011
ISBN 9781908262615

Copyright © Victoria Blisse 2011

The right of Victoria Blisse to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

The story contained within this book is a work of fiction. Names and characters are the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be copied, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, electrostatic, magnetic tape, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the written permission of the publishers: Xcite Books, Suite 11769, 2nd Floor, 145-157 St John Street, London EC1V 4PY

More titles in the Rendezvous Series:

To Flannel, my muse, inspiration and longtime encourager. Without you this story would not exist.

Chapter One

‘I'm just about to   what is it you call it again?   oh yes, dish up tea. Lucy's just tucking into hers.'

‘'Ello, Mumma,' a little voice cries happily.

‘OK, I'll be there in a moment. Hiya, Lucy, hiya, Joe.'

I slip my shoes off my feet and into the corner of the hall. I should put them away but I am too tired to bother. This is the fourth day in a row where I have pulled a twelve hour shift starting at six in the morning. Oh, the joy of 24-hour supermarket opening. Tomorrow, thank the Good Lord above, is going to be my day off.

I walk into my living room and am hit with the soothing scent of cooking meat.

‘Hiya, darlin'.' Joe smiles over his shoulder from the stove in the kitchen, I can see him through the door.

‘Hiya, love,' I reply and walk over to Lucy who gurgle, clucks and coos.

‘Oh, good girl, you've eaten up all your din-dins!'

‘Din-din!' she exclaims in a joyful tone as I kiss her on the forehead. ‘Mumma din-din. Mumma din-din.'

‘Yes, that's a very good idea, Lucy,' Joe says, walking into the kitchen with two plates in his hands. ‘Here's Mummy's dinner now.'

My stomach growls as Joe places the plate of burger and chips before me and my body sings when Joe kisses me before sitting on the other side of the table to eat his own meal.

‘How are you?' he asks as I take a handful of grapes from the fruit bowl in the centre of the table and pass them to Lucy, who giggles with glee. Grapes are her favourite.

‘Tired, achy and glad to be home about sums it up.'

‘I'm not surprised, all the hours you've been working lately.'

‘I know, but at least it's my day off tomorrow.' I sigh happily. I've been looking forward to a day off   just Joe, me and Lucy   all week. I'm determined not to even think about wedding plans. I'm going to give it all a rest and just enjoy my family.

‘Oh, about that.' Joe grins. ‘Your mom rang earlier and she's going to take Lucy tomorrow for us so we can have the day to ourselves.'

Joe looks so thrilled that I try hard to cover my disappointment. I've not played with my baby in so long, I wanted to spend some quality time with her too.

‘Oh, when's she coming, then?' I chirp. ‘That's very kind of her.'

‘Yeah, isn't it? She was saying she misses having her so often so I thought it'd be nice for all of us if Lucy goes to Nanna's for a while. She's going to call over about ten in the morning and will bring her back for her bedtime at seven.'

Well, least I'll have a few hours with her in the morning. I have to think positively. Joe and Mum have both organised this as a treat for me; it would be ungrateful not to realise that.

‘That'll be lovely, Joe. Thanks for organising things for me.'

‘It's my pleasure. I feel like we've barely crossed paths lately.'

He reaches across and squeezes my hand. I smile and my stomach flips. His touch thrills me even when I feel so tired I just want to curl up and sleep.

‘I know, love but this is my last long shift for the week, thank God.'

‘I wish you didn't have to work at all.' Joe sighs and takes a bite of his burger.

‘I know love, but it won't be like this for ever.' I finish off a chip and continue, ‘Any news on the job front?'

I know from the way he purposefully chews the piece of meat in his mouth that it's not going to be a positive answer.

‘Nothing new. No answers to the résumés I've sent out yet. I'm playing a waiting game,' he replies matter-of-factly but I know his continued unemployment is tearing him up inside. Already he's made so many sacrifices. He gave up his expensive apartment in the city to come live with me, for a start, and that was very difficult for him. It was as if he admitted at that point that he was unemployed. Before then, he could convince himself he was just between jobs, on a sabbatical. When he moved out and came to share bills with me it was like he had to admit defeat.

‘You won't have to wait much longer, I'm sure.' I smile and put my knife and fork down on my nearly empty plate. ‘Someone will snap you up soon.'

‘Thank you,' he replies with a weak smile as Lucy starts to whimper.

‘OK, sweetheart, let's get you out of your high chair.'

Adult conversation all but stops as I see to my little girl. She turned one last month and is becoming more independent by the day. She's in her own room now; the tiny box room has bright coloured flowers and cuddly animals on all the walls. Her vocabulary is coming on leaps and bounds; soon she'll be reading
me
bedtime stories.

Time flies and she's growing up right in front of my eyes. I love it and at the same time I hate it. I want to slow the process down so I don't miss a thing but I know I can't and I just cherish every moment I spend with her.

‘She's asleep.' I sigh and flop down on the sofa beside Joe. ‘Sparked out.'

‘We've had a long day,' Joe replies, sliding his arm around my shoulders. ‘We went to the park and the shops and then we drew some pictures. It wore me out, anyway.'

‘Ha.' I chuckle. ‘But seriously, thank you. You're doing a great job.' I kiss his cheek, which I gleefully note is warm and red.

‘I do what I can. It's only fair. I enjoy it too. Lucy's fun to be around.'

‘Yeah, she is.' I must sound more wistful than I realise as Joe squeezes me tighter.

‘I'll get a job soon, Leanna, then you can concentrate on being a mum.'

‘I know, Joe, I know. I'm just tired. I was in exactly this position before you came along; a single mum, worn out by trying to make a good home for Lucy. Now I have you to talk to, to fall back on and Lucy has another parent to look after her. Not that my mum didn't do a good job … '

‘No, your mum's done an awesome job and she still does. We need to make sure Lucy goes to see her more often. She misses her.'

‘Yeah, I know. I'll leave that to you, all right? You can work it out between you.' I smile and Joe nods. ‘Oh, I picked up an extra shift next week. You know I was only doing the morning on Wednesday? Well, I'm working till four now instead. Sharon needs the afternoon off to take her little boy to the dentist.'

‘I don't like you working so much.' Joe sighs.

‘Well, love, I have to if we want to keep paying our bills and finish paying for the wedding.'

‘Oh, talking about the wedding, I've had a response from my mom.'

‘Oh yes.' I'm very interested, but try to sound nonchalant. When we talked about who to invite it was the first time Joe had even mentioned his mother to me and he was fairly dismissive of her. She divorced his father when he was a kid and had a list of further husbands and divorces from that time on. At 18 he'd escaped, got his own flat and concentrated hard on his work. He barely even contacted his mum; they sent each other Christmas cards and that was it. He wasn't even sure he wanted to invite her to the wedding, and I'd told him it was up to him.

In the end he decided he should send an invitation, just to let her know what was going on. He said to me that he knew she wouldn't come all this way just for him.

‘She wants to come.'

‘Oh, right, that's good, then.' I smile at the unexpected answer.

‘Yeah, I suppose.' He sighs. ‘She's going to come over a few days before. She's booked herself in some hotel in the centre of Manchester which means we shouldn't see too much of her.'

‘Are you all right?' I ask. I can't ignore his bland tone.

‘Yeah, yeah, of course. I didn't think she cared enough to come, and I still don't think she cares enough to come, She just wants an excuse for a holiday in England. I'm not looking forward to seeing her but I won't let her rain on our parade. I can't wait till I can call you my wife.'

‘Only four weeks left, baby.' I stroke my hand down his chest. ‘Not much time left to back out now … '

‘I never would,' he replies without hesitation. ‘I may not be looking forward to all the – how does your mum put it? Oh yes   fannying around on the day but I cannot wait until we're married. I want to be with you for ever.'

‘Aw, thanks. However, we have to talk about the fannying around bit. There's only a month to go and you've not decided what you're going to wear yet.'

‘I want to just wear my suit. I don't know why I can't,' he says with a pout.

‘Joe, it's your wedding day. You can't just wear the same suit you've been wearing for work all these years.'

‘But why not, I mean you're the one who keeps going on about keeping costs down.'

Joe's arm comes from around my shoulders and he crosses it in front of his body.

‘I know, but there are some things you can't skimp on. I don't want you to look like a tramp on the day.'

‘Leanna, my suit is damn good quality, it will do. I am not going to go out and buy a new one or even hire one when I have a perfectly serviceable suit in the wardrobe. I will not show you up on the day.'

‘You will if you don't listen to what I am saying.' I snap.

‘I am listening, I'm just not going to do it. I like my suit. It's fitted, it's comfortable and I want to wear it for my wedding.'

‘Fine,' I snap standing up and moving away from the couch, ‘but then you're not getting married to me.'

I stormed out of the room and upstairs to the bedroom. I know it seems a petty thing to get so upset about but we'd been having the same conversation for months. I want him to have a lovely new suit to mark the beginning of his wonderful new life with me and Lucy but he insists on holding on to his suit from the past. He's right, it's a very nice suit, I've often admired it but it is a left over from his old life.

I pull off my uniform with a sigh and hang it in the wardrobe. I slip into my nightshirt. It's big, it's red and it has a sleepy dog cartoon on the front of it. I don't care about looking alluring tonight. I wonder if Joe will come up to bed at all or whether he'll sleep on the sofa again. He's done that several times in the last few months. Sometimes because of arguments and other times because … well, I don't know why.

I know it's been tough for him, losing his job. He's always dismissive of it and says he'd do it again in a heartbeat and I know he means it. He wanted to come home to me and he took the consequences of disobeying his boss, but he does regret being sacked.

He might deny it, but if he could have done both he would have done both. Blimey, that job was his life all the time I knew him and for years before that and then suddenly it wasn't there anymore. He was upbeat and happy at first. He treated it as a long holiday, or vacation in his American words, that he would enjoy while he could because he knew he would get another job offer soon enough.

But weeks turned into months and months into more months and no job offers came in. Joe has filled in application forms, sent off his CV to people even knocked door to door to see if there was a position out there for him but no one is hiring in his specific field. We both know that he is going to have to start looking at different jobs soon. Lower paid jobs that are less skill specific and more general labour. He's avoided it so far but we can't take many more months of relying on my wage.

Joe had savings, still has some but I said we should keep those. They were what he'd squirreled away for his old age and we will need savings in our old age still. All other monies have been used up. Some went to wedding things like my dress and the cake and flowers and other bits went to decorating Lucy's room and moving Joe from his old place to ours.

He'd not really wanted to leave his flat but with the rent being twice that of mine per month for a simple one bed flat it just was not economical for him to stay on there. He'd not had a vast amount of stuff to move really but it was still a long weekend that involved a fair amount of swearing and sweating. I'd been extra gentle with him the few days after the move because I knew his emotions would be raw.

Suddenly, I get it. I sit bolt upright in bed as I realise why Joe has been so adamant about the suit. It's not just his suit, it's
him.
The essence of what he was before he lost his job. The only real, tangible thing he has left from those days. He doesn't want to lose everything he was. He's already lost his flat, his bachelor freedom and he doesn't want to lose anything more.

And what have I been doing? I've been telling him he has to move on, get something new. I've been telling him to get rid of everything he was, even though I didn't realise it, that is just what I had done.

As I lift the corner of the duvet to get out of bed, the bedroom door opens. Joe walks in, head down and after shutting the door behind him he walks over and sits on the bed. He lays a hand over mine and squeezes it.

‘I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so stubborn. I'll go get measured for that new suit tomorrow, if you like.'

‘No, I don't like,' I reply, ‘I've been completely hard-headed and I've just realised what I've been asking you to do. I don't want you to be anyone but
you
at our wedding. I don't want you to change. I've been such a fool. You should wear your favourite suit to the wedding, in fact I insist on it.'

He looks up, his broad face is covered with a smile that lights up his cloud grey eyes.

‘Thank you,' he whispers before his lips touch mine. There is a revelation in the intensity of his kiss. It hits me how important this decision was. If I'd continued to insist on a new suit that I'd have lost something vital from my man. And he was willing to give it up. He was willing to pander to my wishes to make me happy despite the attachment he has to that garment.

His hands smooth down my arms and I press my fingers to his chest. Clothes do not make the man but you cannot take away the symbolism associated with a garment. Cool, calm, sophisticated business man Joe is represented by the suit. I love that part of my fiancé and can't believe how close I came to stripping that away from him.