Authors: Danielle Steel
“Yeah, whatever. The consulting is fine. And now I’ll get to see Chris.”
“Give him my love,” Ben said, and she took a cab to the Reno airport, and caught the plane to Denver. And she got a cab to the hotel when she got there. Chris said he was busy that night with basketball practice, and she was meeting him the next day for breakfast, before she met with Bill.
It worked out perfectly. She met Chris at his dorm, and met his roommates, who all looked very nice. She brought him the bag of things from home, and they walked around the campus, and then she took him out to breakfast at a restaurant nearby. He looked happy and relaxed and said he was having fun. He couldn’t wait till ski season started, but in the meantime he was playing basketball, and was on the swim team. And she dropped him off at school when she left, with a little tug at her heart. She had promised to see him again before she left on Sunday.
And then she took the cab to Bill’s, where he was waiting for her with plans, résumés, and adjustments to the model, and he wanted her advice on a dozen subjects. They got right to work at his kitchen table, and were deeply engrossed in architecture plans, when Lily rolled into the kitchen to get some lunch. She was going over to Craig to visit Teddy, and then she was going to a college fair at her school to pick up some applications and brochures. She had promised to get some for Teddy too. And she was happy to see Jessie, who looked equally pleased to see her.
“You look great, Lily,” Jessie told her, as they stopped working for a few minutes. “How’s senior year going?”
“Okay, so far,” Lily said with a broad smile. “I haven’t flunked out yet. I’m going to a college fair today.” Her father didn’t comment, and Lily made herself something to eat while they went back to work. And a little while later she left, and then Jessie thought of something and looked up at Bill.
“How is she getting around these days?” She had heard a car door slam and a car drive off. He looked sheepish when she asked the question.
“I got her a car with manual controls. She didn’t want me driving her to school. I know, I spoil her, but it really made sense, and she needs some independence.” Jessie smiled at him as soon as he said it. “She can even get her wheelchair into the car all by herself,” he said proudly.
“You don’t need to apologize to me. I think it’s a great idea. And she’s a very responsible kid.”
“I’m glad you think so.” Lily really had made a remarkable adjustment to her situation, with every possible advantage Bill could give her. And Jessie thought he had done well too. He had come far since January, when he refused to accept the reality of her situation. Now he was building a rehab of his own. It still amazed her.
They went out to look at The Lily Pad together that afternoon, and went over his notes and drawings, and she solved the problems of how to structure the medical wing. They were keeping the medical aspect to a minimum, but they had to be realistic about the kind of care their residents would need, and some would need more than others. They had to have some kind of medical facility. They were just walking out of the building when Joe arrived with Carole. She had flown in from Boston early that morning, and they’d been going over other plans and a list of counselors Carole thought they should hire. And the minute the two women saw each other, they both looked pleased, and gave each other a warm hug.
“How lucky is that?” Carole said immediately. “That we’re here on the same weekend?” She thought her old friend looked tired, and in contrast Jessie thought Carole had never looked better, although she recognized instantly that the stylish dark hair she wore was a wig. She remembered Carole’s own hair as a little lighter and softer. But her new hairdo was very chic. She hadn’t seen Carole since she’d been sick.
The four of them sat together in the main office after that and went over the architect’s plans and blueprints, Bill pointed out things they were changing on the model, and the swimming pool and the building it was in were almost complete. And then they went down a list of potential employees together. They were getting down to the wire on some of them. Bill wanted their skeleton office staff in place by the end of the year.
“We have no medical director yet,” Carole said with a look of concern. Bill and Joe were worried about it too, but no one they really liked and felt comfortable with had appeared.
“Not unless you can convince Dr. Matthews to do it,” Bill said with an imploring look at Jessie, and she shook her head.
“You guys know I can’t. Someone will turn up. We’ve got feelers out in hospitals all over the country. It’s just a matter of time,” she said confidently.
“We’re opening in eleven months,” Bill reminded her, and she nodded. And they went on to other things until after five o’clock. The four of them were planning to have dinner, Carole left with Joe, and Bill drove Jessie back to the hotel at six. They both looked tired on the ride back, they had covered a lot of ground all day, and it was hard getting everything done and discussed in the two days she was there.
“You know, I’m serious about your taking the job as medical director, Jessie. Whatever it takes. I’d like to give you a house to go with the job, and a salary that would make it worth your while.”
“I love to be bribed,” she said, teasing him. “And a house would be great. The one we’re in now is falling down around our ears now that Tim’s not there to do repairs. But it would mean moving three kids to a new city and new schools. Heather would have to graduate here instead of with her friends. She’s a junior this year and she’ll be a senior next year. It just wouldn’t be fair to them.” And it was a sacrifice she felt she had to make no matter how appealing the job was or how good the salary. “They don’t understand the economics of something like that. Their lives have already been disrupted enough losing their father. I might be able to do it with the two younger boys—they’re young enough to adjust, especially Jimmy, who just turned seven, and Adam’s twelve. But at Heather’s age, she would feel like I’m destroying her life, moving her for her last year of high school.”
“We have some great schools here,” Bill said, but he had lost hope of convincing her. She was too dedicated a mother to do something that would upset her kids, even if it cost her a great job opportunity. Her kids were the priority, just as Lily was for him.
They had gotten to the hotel by then, and he promised to pick Carole and Jessie up at seven-thirty. They were going to meet Joe at the restaurant.
Jessie went upstairs, lay down on the bed, and called her friend. “Wow, that was a long day. We do so much when we come out here. You must too.”
“We really do,” Carole agreed.
“Do you want to come to my room?” Jessie invited her. “It’s so good to be here together. I wish we could have dinner alone tonight.” It would have been nice to have a girls’ evening, and Carole agreed.
“Yeah, I thought of it too, but I didn’t want to be rude. They’re so nice to me every time I come here.”
“Are you going to move for a job out here?” Jessie asked with interest. It made more sense for her since she was on her own.
“It’s a great project and I love what they’re doing, but I don’t want to leave Mass General. Call me a job snob, but I love the prestige of working for an institution like that.” Jessie smiled at what she said.
“I don’t blame you, I’d feel the same way, although I think The Lily Pad is going to be something very special. Bill is pouring a fortune into it, and really doing it right. If we can help him staff it decently, it’s going to be fabulous.”
“What about you?” Carole asked her. “Would you move here?”
“I can’t move my kids, not after Tim. Can you imagine how traumatic that would be for them?”
“Kids adjust better than we think, and they have each other and you. And Chris is in school here now, so you’d all be together, more than you are in Squaw, with Chris away at school.”
“Try explaining that to my daughter. She thinks the center of the universe is Squaw. Tim thought so too.” She laughed, and Carole promised to come down in a minute, and she appeared at Jessie’s door five minutes later in jeans, ballet shoes, a Harvard sweatshirt, and a scarf on her head. The long dark locks had disappeared.
“Sorry.” She patted her head when Jessie saw her. “It’s nice to take my wig off for a while. My hair is finally coming in, but it’s all wiry and weird.” She took the scarf off, and Jessie could see the bristle all over her head, which was lighter than the wig, just as she’d remembered. “My hair was never as good as that wig,” she admitted with a grin and sat on the end of Jessie’s bed. “So what’s new with you? Anything?”
“Are you kidding? Between work and the kids, I don’t even have time to sleep. And half the time I’m on call. It’s been pretty crazy for the last nine months, and not a lot of fun.”
“It’ll get better,” Carole reassured her, but Jessie didn’t look convinced. She couldn’t imagine her life getting better again without Tim. It had been a very tough year.
“I don’t know how,” she said honestly, “unless I retire or give up the kids. And it’s going to be harder now without Chris—he’s been a big help. It’ll do him good to get away. He was constantly taking care of the younger ones. I just hired someone to help. What about you? Is life getting back to normal after Dylan and being sick?”
“Pretty much. I feel really good. I’m back on track, and the consulting here has been great, thanks to you. That’s about all I’m doing right now. It’s enough.” She seemed satisfied with her life, and for a second Jessie envied her. She still hadn’t made peace with losing Tim.
“You’re not dating anyone?” Jessie asked cautiously. Carole was a beautiful young woman and five years younger than Jessie.
Carole shook her head with a determined look at her friend. “I’m done.” She sounded definite about it, and Jessie looked skeptical.
“At thirty-eight? I hope not. Don’t be silly. Just give it time.” Carole could have said the same to her, but she didn’t. She could see that Jessie was still grieving Tim and their lost life. It was too soon for her.
“I don’t need time. It’s different for me. I can’t have kids. I don’t want to get married again. Dylan cured me of that. My body is … well, different. I’m not ready to show this to anyone, and I don’t want reconstructive surgery. It’s too much. I went through enough last year with the double mastectomy and hysterectomy. And I’m happier like this, on my own.”
“I hope you’re seeing a shrink,” Jessie said seriously, and knew her well enough to say it. “You can’t give up on your life as a woman at your age.” She had made a tough choice, and Jessie thought it was the wrong one.
“Yes, I can.” She looked satisfied with her decision and seemed to have no doubts or regrets about being alone. “I can do whatever I want, and I don’t have to put up with shit from a guy. It’s not as bad as you think,” she said with a mischievous grin. “I’d been accommodating men for years—my father, the guys I went out with, Dylan. This is a lot easier and a lot more fun than making life wonderful for some crabby guy who cheats on you in the end and dumps you anyway.”
“Not everyone acts like Dylan,” who had had an enormous ego and was a narcissist in Jessie’s opinion. Tim had never behaved like that with her. He was a good guy, and surely not the only one in the world to treat a woman well. Carole had just married the wrong one. “There are some good ones out there.”
“They’re all married, and I’m fine like this. It would be different if Dylan and I had stayed married, but I’m not starting out with a new guy with this ravaged body. No way.” Jessie was sorry to hear her say it, and sad for her, she was so definite about it. And then they went on to talk about their respective jobs and reminisce about their work at Stanford Hospital, which had been fun for both of them. And then it was time to dress for dinner.
“I wish we could stay here and order room service,” Jessie said wistfully. It was relaxing and nice just sitting there and talking. She had no women friends anymore after her years with Tim, and no time for them now, chasing her kids all the time, and working as hard as she did.
“It’ll do us good to go out,” Carole said as she got off the bed. They consulted briefly about what to wear for dinner, and Carole went back to her room. Jessie was thinking how much she liked Carole, as she got into the shower. She missed having someone to talk to now without Tim.
They met in the lobby half an hour later. Jessie was wearing a short black skirt, gray cashmere sweater, and heels, and Carole was wearing a red leather skirt, black sweater, and sexy boots, and her freshly brushed wig. They were a very good-looking pair. And Bill looked impressed as he picked them up, wearing gray slacks and a black suede jacket he’d bought in Italy, and he had a crisp blue shirt under it with an open collar.
“I feel very lucky being with two very beautiful women,” he said as he walked them to his car. The three of them chatted easily on the way to the restaurant, and Joe was waiting when they arrived. They talked about The Lily Pad all night, although Jessie noticed that Joe looked at Carole differently from the way Bill looked at either of them. She could easily see that Joe had a soft spot for Carole, and she mentioned it to her as they walked back into the hotel afterward.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Carole brushed off the suggestion. “We just work well together.”
“Yeah, you may think so.” Jessie laughed at her. “I think he has something else in mind too. Do you like him?” Jessie was curious, and Carole just laughed.
“I think he’s fine. I’m not dating, remember? And he’s too old. But it doesn’t matter. I’m not in the market for a guy.”
“I don’t think he’s looking for a woman either after his experience with his wife. I think he just likes you. Sometimes that’s how things happen,” Jessie said wisely.
“Trust me, nothing’s happening. When are you leaving?” Carole asked her.
“After I see Chris tomorrow.”
“Let’s try and come out at the same time again,” Carole suggested. “It was fun.”
“Yes, it was,” Jessie agreed, and hugged her as she left the elevator. “Call me sometime. I miss you, Carole.”
“Yeah, me too,” she said, and waved as the elevator closed. It had been a very pleasant evening, and every time she came to Denver, Carole got more excited about The Lily Pad, and now Jessie felt the same. It was an exciting project, and the man who was organizing it was a wonderful person. And his passion for what he was doing was contagious. They were all on fire with his plans and following his dream.